DISCLAIMER:- The following text is sexually explicit and contains depictions of sexual acts that have been classified by the surgeon general as potentially dangerous and unhealthy. You must be a broad minded adult to read the text, and you must not make this text available to minors or to any person who does not wish to view it. Unprotected sexual relations with unknown partners is hazardous and we urge the use of condoms and safe sex at all times.

My parents died in a car accident when I was 17, just six months before my high school graduation. I went to stay with a school friend until the end of the academic year, but since I was so close to 18, and had already been admitted to college, I never really had a guardian in a real sense. Tragedy emancipated me early.

My name is Joe. I lived in Western Massachusetts, and by the time of my parents’ deaths I had been dating Tanya Spillman for two years. I was an awkward boy, good in school but not too socially adept. While I had grown in confidence in high school, it is not too surprising looking back that I met Tanya, my only high school girlfriend, at summer camp, instead of in school where I never felt that comfortable.

Like a lot of summer camp relationships, Tanya and mine was particularly intense, in a naïve way. We gave each other our first experiences with physical intimacy. The tension of my palm resting for the first time on her thigh. Then the next time a little higher. On another occasion on her stomach, just close enough to her chest that the bottom of her breast grazed my thumb when she breathed. We laid like that for what seemed like hours on grass near bushes, our pulses accelerating, until we heard someone approach. And then it was over.

Tanya was relatively short, and in the summertime she wore longish shorts that made her slim hips look almost boyish. But for a 16 year old she had a perfect figure, especially for a girl who was short and pretty thin, and an innocent face with light brown hair framing it perfectly.

We were so innocent, and summer camp so supervised, that we couldn’t really go past French kissing in terms of direct skin to skin contact. But we found our own way. On the last weekend of camp, the whole camp was supposed to participate in two days of team competitions. We found a way to disappear in the chaos, and bring some pillows and blankets with us to a large abandoned cement run-off pipe. It was dry in the summer, and large enough for two people to lay down.

There, laying for hours uninterrupted, Tanya and I explored each others’ bodies. Mostly, it was enough for us to touch through the thin cotton fabric of our shorts and T-shirts. Somehow, at that age, at that level of inexperience, skin is even more sensitive. I still her remember her gasp as I fully cupped her breast for the first time. I remember the thrill as she held my hand to her chest, and it occurred to me that she really liked this just as much as I did.

Eventually, slowly, tentatively, we moved toward our crotches. Her hand found mine first, and the pulsating electricity that her finger tip sent from my penis, even through a layer of cotton, nearly made me black out. I felt myself losing control. Then she said, “Touch me.” I returned the favor, and she gasped again. I felt moisture through her shorts, and the faint outline of her slit. She began to moan. Her legs spread slightly, and her hips began rocking, up and down, very slowly, lifting up off the blanket. At the time, I didn’t know that women do that during sex, and it was the most arousing sight I had ever encountered.

Then Tanya pulled me on top of her. For a brief few minutes we had our first, partial experience with sex, albeit in the form of dry humping. It didn’t matter; we experienced the closeness of pleasure from the pressing urgency of our bodies. The sensitive underside of my penis, now completely erect, pressed against my shorts between her legs. I thrusted, and she gasped back at me. I felt the ridge of her pubic bone through the cotton between us, and I began noticing that she was still thrusting her hips. I thrust again, and she rocked her hips faster. I was learning about sex, and the fact that because she was aroused, and she wanted me as much as I wanted her, I did not have full control over my own stimulation. Her movements along could bring me to climax. She pulled me closer to her, and drove me to the edge.

“Oh, oh,” she said.

“Tanya …”

And then, so quickly, explosion. A quick, ecstatic surge of pleasure and pressure.

“Tanya …”

“Stay right there,” she said, her hips rocking, her arms clutching me, one on my back, one on my buttocks.

“Oh God.”

“Joe!” she screamed, and her hips rose higher.

And then I ejaculated, pure pleasure flowing out of me, and into my underwear.

“Oh God, Tanya.”

“Oh!”

I think I might of giggled then.

“I know, I know,” she said.

What made Tanya and me different as summer camp relationships go is that we stayed together. For the next two years, about once month, I went up to her house in a small town in New Hampshire, and we talked on the phone regularly. We never were able to repeat our interlude under the run-off pipe because we were always supervised by her mother at her house. And I think that increased our bond. We had that intense, personal, sexual memory, something unique and special to us. But we couldn’t quite move beyond it, not yet anyway.

Tanya’s mother, Sara, was a professor in the Department of Neuro-Psychology at the liberal arts college in the town where they lived. Her father was estranged long before, and Sara and Tanya had a relationship that combined friendship and parenthood. Sara’s research specialty was actually the evolution and anatomy of human sexuality. This came as a shock, because, initially at least, she hardly seemed as liberal as this profession would seem to imply.

Sara seems to hover over Tanya and me on my first visits especially, and seemed suspicious about our relationship. I felt insecure too, so this only heightened my nervousness. Gradually, Tanya explained to me that her mother specialized in uncovering how human sexuality related to evolution, especially how sexual behavior thwarted or promoted procreation and birth control. The idea was that human beings can have more control over their reproduction than other animals, but their bodies can still sometimes overpower them.

Sara did studies on condom usage and the withdrawal method, and correlations between failure rates (ie where people failed to use their intended methods of birth control), fertility and life circumstances. Other studies had found that people failed to use birth control for frequently during the most fertile week of the female cycle, but Sara found that they also failed more at times when, from an evolutionary point of view, it was advantageous to reproduce. This included times when people did not consciously want to get pregnant, like when young people are students. From the body’s point of view, the fact that people are young and healthy, well fed and with secure housing meant it was time to reproduce. But ambitious young people wanted to avoid pregnancy.

In general, Sara concluded that the rate of failure, whether forgetting to use condoms, forgetting to take the pill, or failure to withdrawal, depended not on whether people wanted to avoid pregnancy, but on how much anxiety and stress they felt in their lives. And it was true for both men and women.

Previous researchers had assumed that younger people were just naturally more careless. But Sara found evidence that that wasn’t the cause. During exam times, when young people felt more anxiety, they actually practiced safer sex, but when they felt less stress and anxiety, they often failed (usually at the last minute) to use condoms or to withdrawal. And girls were more consistent about taking the pill when they were stressed and anxious. During sex, both men and women felt more desire to begin penetration quicker (ie without stopping to put on a condom) or to stay in longer (without withdrawal) when they generally felt less stress in their lives.

Sara’s findings went even farther, delving into how people stimulated each other during foreplay. It was already known that a woman’s arousal leads her cervix to dip into the vagina, and her orgasm produces a kind of dipping and sucking motion to pull semen into the uterus. More obviously, both men and women have an urge to clutch each other, thrust deeper, and move for the deepest possible penetration as they reach the plateau stage of arousal, making sure the man ejaculates as close to the cervix as possible. But those are actually two of many ways that sexual activity and pleasure can be shaped around reproduction.

Sara found that women were not just more likely to orgasm during penetration if they felt less anxious, but also if their partners fondled their breasts and nipples during foreplay. Not only that, playing with a woman’s breasts lowered the acidity of the fluids she released into her vagina, prolonging the amount of time that sperm could survive. But sensitivity of the breasts was not limited to women, though men did not always feel as comfortable talking about such erogenous zones. Her research found that male sperm count rises if a woman fondles his nipples during foreplay, along with hormones in his semen that prolong the uterine and cervical contractions that are associated with orgasm.

But Sara had most recently conducted a particular groundbreaking research where she actually filmed couples having sex, with consent and in a laboratory. Each couple was examined first to determine fertility, without telling them the results, and were subject to psychological profiling. All were sexually active and monogamous, but said adamantly that they wanted to use birth control and feared pregnancy.

Sara discovered the following:

• When both men and women faced stresses in life, they nearly always either used a condom correctly, or withdrew before ejaculation. Not only that, analysis of the videos showed they both showed less interest in breast and nipple foreplay.
• When neither felt stress overall, both partners tended to spend long periods playing with each others’ nipples and breasts, both before and during penetration. They often ended up with vaginal penetration before putting on a condom, and appeared to have difficulty withdrawing. In other words, a high failure rate for birth control.
• When the man felt less stress than the woman, he often spent long period caressing her breasts, but she often pulled his hands away. In these cases, it was usually the woman who spent the most effort making sure that birth control was used. He, by contrast, often tried to enter her before putting on a condom, and hesitating to withdrawal.
• When a woman felt less stress than the man, the reverse happened. She continually brushed her hands over her partner’s nipples – often without realized (in questioning later) that she had done so. And she often initiated penetration, before the condom, or held him close to her to delay withdrawal.

I heard these titillating findings directly from my girlfriend’s mother herself. After about a year of visiting up at their house, Sara began seeming more relaxed around me, talked more about herself, and began actually treating Tanya and my relationship seriously, implying in conversation that we might stay together for the long term. After prodding from Tanya, Sara finally agreed to tell both of us in detail about her work. And with that, we got the most detailed sex talk we could imagine, in the form of a day long private lecture.

You could expect that someone who did this work for a living could not possibly be a conservative in terms of conventional political ideas about sex, and that was certainly true. But nor was Sara in favor of free sex. Sara concluded her lecture with a dissertation on her philosophy.

“We have to realize two key things here,” she said. “First, humans are animals, but we want to be civilized. That means we want to rise above our natural instincts, and be more than what natural evolution made us.

“Second, about sex, we should realize it’s a great thing, but its origins are totally animalistic, from evolution. But that doesn’t mean sex is only for reproduction. That’s its first function. But it is also for stress relief, and you could say, fun, which is something many animals need. And it can be, but isn’t always, something that brings a couple together. People today have the technology to separate the fun and the love from the reproduction, but they can’t forget that they are still animals. The evolutionary desire to reproduce will sneak in during sex, and sometimes prevent us from using the technology that we think will make us more civilized. In other words, our animal sides defeat all our best efforts at birth control.

Sara went on to say something that some might find more radical, that because people make clouded decisions about birth control during sex, the only way people could rise above animal desires is to be more liberal about abortion, especially easy access to over-the-counter abortion medication. She said, “When people are about to have sex, they aren’t going to make reliable decisions. If we want the decision about having to be rational, not animalistic, then a civilized society has to allow people to make the decision at a different time.”

And then she got to her bottom line. “So, about you two, who I know can and probably will have a sexual relationship. But I’ve been stopping you, I know. That is because from all I know, I want you to have the deepest relationship you can. That means having all three parts of sex working together. Fun, love, and yes, reproduction. That doesn’t mean I want you to have a baby, but it means you aren’t ready. These things are not easy to balance.

Tanya and I just stared at each other, our mouths open.

Then Sara laughed. “Okay, now that I’ve spent several hours getting you two worked up, I am going to have to hover over you especially vigilantly to make sure you don’t go too far. And since you’re going to college together in the fall, I’ll have to think about how best to help you transition, so to speak.”

That conversation took place just a couple weeks before my parents’ accident. When I was in shock and then grief, both Tanya and her mom came to visit, several times. I went up to their house every weekend. They really were my main support network. And once school ended, I went up to spend the summer. I needed to get away.

Needless to say, Tanya and I slept in separate rooms whenever I visited. But during the period after my parents’ deaths, things started to change. Sara said that she saw our relationship was serious, because Tanya supported me and I needed her support in a period of pain. Then, one day, Sara said: “In July you’ll both be 18, and you’ll be here until college in September. So, I think it is natural that I let your relationship evolve. And I mean about sex.”

We just looked at her.

“I will let you sleep in the same room together, but on one condition.”

“What’s that, Mom?” Tanya said.

“You have to let me help you start your sexual relationship. It is going to require some trust and daring on your parts. But I promise you it will be safe in the end, you will not end up with a child together in college, but your relationship and, if I can say, your pleasure, will be much deeper.”

“I think we both trust you, but what exactly do you mean?” I said

“Wait until July,” she said.

“Should I get a pill prescription then?” Tanya said, trying to sound half joking.

Her mom answered seriously. “No, just trust me, and wait until July.”

So we waited. Eroticized, obsessed by sex, and tortured by the wall between our rooms, we waited.

The waiting was over.

Both Tanya and I were eighteen. We had finished high school. My parents were gone, and I was beginning to feel like I had turned a corner. I had moved up to Tanya’s house for the summer while we waited for college. Tanya and I spent all day together, and managed to find some private time for cuddling, and some anxious touching. But in her mother’s house, we could never be together long enough to go farther, and we were sleeping in separate rooms. Not only that, her mom had made us anticipate the big moment in July that we were willing to wait, against our rising desires.

Tanya’s mom, Sara, had given us the strong impression that she was going to let us have sex, but in some way that applied her research. She promised that we could sleep together. And she’d given the strange instruction to Tanya not to use birth control.

On June 30, delivery men arrived to put a double bed in Tanya’s room. “It’s not as big as a queen, but you two will want to sleep close.”

The next morning, we went downstairs early, as if it was Christmas. Sara was already awake, sipping coffee in her bathroom and T-Shirt. “I thought you two would rise early.”

“It’s July,” said Tanya, a little desperately.

“Yes, it is,” said her Mom. “Are you excited?”

I nodded. So did Tanya.

“But nervous?”

“Well, Mom, we’ve waited awhile, but normally I would think that we should have done something about birth co –“

Sara interrupted. “Remember, just trust me. And I promise, you will not end up pregnant or with a baby.”

Tanya and I nodded.

“So, do you and Joe want breakfast first, or shall we go up to your room?”

Tanya and I looked at each other.

“I assume we should go up now, and have breakfast later.” Sara seemed amused.

Tanya and I turned around, and silently walked back upstairs. We walked just inside the doorway to Tanya’s room, and then turned around. Her mom was following us. “Why don’t you two sit on the edge of the bed, and I’ll explain what we’re going to do.”

My heart was racing, and I was already feeling a little aroused. Neither Tanya nor I said anything.

“Well, go ahead and sit down.”

Like obedient pupils, we sat next to each other on the edge of the bed, looking back at Sara. We were both wearing nearly identical clothes, what we had slept in fact. T-Shirts and shorts. It was something that I thought made Tanya all the more attractive, her tendency for T-Shirts and boxers to sleep instead of nightgowns. The shorts always hugged her slim but round hips, and the T-shirts always looked just a little tight around the round fronts of her breasts.

“So here’s the deal,” Sara began. “This is optional, so I don’t want to force it on you. But my goal is to give you guys a first experience with sex that is as deep as possible. For that to happen, you have to feel a little out of control, a little vulnerable, and very close to each other. As I told you, you need to trust me, and be a little daring.

“The daring part is that you are both going to have to get naked in front of me, and you will end up having sex in front of me. The trusting part is that, instead of trying to use regular birth control, you will avoid a pregnancy my way.”

“What does that mean?” I said.

“Well it means this. I fully expect that this summer you and Tanya will conceive a baby, maybe more than once.”

“More than once?” Tanya said.

“Yes. But I said, conceive. What I would ask you to do is divorce in your minds pregnancy, which is carrying a child to term to enter this world, and conception. You will conceive, but you don’t have to be pregnant. I have stocked up from the lab on early detection kits so that we can test Tanya for conception. They are can turn positive just three or four days from conception. Tanya will use them every three days from now on. If it comes up positive, then I have a stock of pills that will prevent pregnancy at that stage. Think of them as pills to make sure you get your period even if you conceive. Now, do either of you have a moral objection to this?”

We shook our heads.

“Okay, then should we begin?”

We nodded.

“What you should both understand from the beginning is that you are both very fertile people, and you are also very sensitive people sexually. Your sensitivity will allow you to lose control with each other, and will release your fertility. Joe, Tanya’s body will cause you to release your semen into her. Tanya, Joe’s body will stimulate you to open yourself to his semen. In the process of losing control, you have to trust each other. And you will hopefully have a lot of fun.”

“Okay,” I said.

Sara nodded. “Now, I am going to lead you through sex. It will be a simple process. Maybe even clinical. Joe, I’m sorry but I will have Tanya be on top. You two can do this however you want from now on, but for your first time I think I want to make sure you learn that being on top or on the bottom is not a male or female role.”

We nodded again.

“So, if you don’t have any questions or objections, what I want you to do is get undressed, completely undressed, but don’t touch each other, and lay down next to each other on the bed.”

Tanya and I began slowly disrobing. I didn’t look at her until I was totally naked. I thought it would be easier to continue the process that way. When I looked at her, she was bent down pulling off her panties. Her skin was smoother, a little more tan than I thought. I realized that I had touched her in many places, but never saw completely naked like this, nor her me. She stood up, and I first saw her rounded hips, jutting out just slightly from her waist. Her vagina, with just a light tuff of hair above, and round breasts, hanging just slightly, from her chest. My gaze reached her eyes, and she mouthed “hi” to me and smiled. I smiled back.

Tanya climbed on to the bed, and laid on its far edge. I followed her and laid on the opposite edge. We did not touch, as instructed.

Sara continued her instructions. “Okay, now, everything will happen in just one position. Very simple and easy. I want Joe to move into the middle of the bed, and Tanya, you’ll straddle him over his thighs. Don’t let your genitals touch yet, though.”

It was an awkward movement, but I started sliding over, and Tanya lifted herself over me. We looked at each other. I felt her soft legs resting on my thighs, and I began becoming more aroused. I wasn’t sure how hard I was, but I was sure that my arousal was obvious. This time I mouthed “hi” to Tanya.

“Now,” Sara said, “I want you to look at each other’s chests. We’re going to start by making you even more fertile, and more sensitive. Tanya, you will reach down and gently stroke Joe’s nipples. Joe, do the same to Tanya.”

When Tanya touched me, I was shocked how sensitive I really was on my nipples. I thought that was only women, but I was wrong. Tanya gently brushed her thumbs over my nipples, and the tingling in my chest seemed connected directly to my penis. I gasped. I grew harder, and I felt like pressure was growing in my balls, as if sperm was increasing and building up.

When I touched Tanya’s nipples, she closed her eyes for a second and then opened them again. I started by just brushing my hands over her nipples and the skin just beneath them. After a few minutes Sara chimed in, “Joe, you can gently squeeze Tanya if you want to.” I did just that, and Tanya sighed. Her breasts were as soft in texture as they were to squeeze.

For endless minutes, Tanya and I caressed each other this way. Tanya sighed, and I breathed more deeply. Every so often Tanya closed her eyes and opened them. I felt heat and moisture coming from Tanya over my legs. My penis was so hard and sensitive now that I felt even small movements of air over it.

Sara began speaking in a soft voice. “You guys are doing great. Joe, you can probably feel the semen building up in you. And Tanya, as you become more and more aroused, your cervix is dropping into your vagina so it can receive Joe’s semen. Your vagina is becoming an open place for him. Joe, when you look at Tanya, think about how fertile she is, how warm a place her body is to start a new life. Tanya, look at Joe and think about how much sperm he has to put into you.”

By this time, I was so aroused that all I wanted to do was grab Tanya and jump on top of her. Tanya was panting, and her eyes were closed much more of the time, as if she was concentrating and holding herself back. I noticed her hips rock just barely.

Sara broke in. “Okay love birds, I will let you have some relief now. Now listen. You are young, very fertile, very aroused, and very sensitive. Very soon, Tanya will put Joe inside her, and you are both going to lose control, and orgasm. I don’t think it will take long, so savor it.”

I looked up at Tanya and she looked at me. We stopped out caressing.

“Tanya,” her mother said, “the most sensitive part of Joe’s penis is the smooth part that you see facing you, above the hair. That’s the part that your vagina will caress and squeeze until he ejaculates. I want you to lift his penis, but only touch the other side, not the sensitive part.”

Tanya reach forward and gently scooped my penis by the tips of her fingers. Now I closed me eyes in concentration.

“Now, Tanya, lift yourself up above him. With your other hand, you might want to spread you vagina just a little. It will make it easier. Then, very simply, lower yourself, put your vagina around his penis, put Joe inside you, and lower yourself on him.”

Tanya moved quietly, and I squeezed me eyes. Suddenly I felt the tight, wet, warm round grip of Tanya’s vagina slide down my penis. The electricity, the heat was overwhelming. I felt warm blood flood my head. As she lowered herself, bringing my most sensitive part inside her, I groaned, and I thrust my hips up.

“Oh God, Joe,” Tanya said, and then she started rocking her hips, rising up and down.

‘Tanya, Tanya –“

I opened me eyes and I saw the most beautiful girl in the world, her eyes closed in ecstasy, rising up and down on me.

“Joe, Tanya, slow down, try to slow down,” Sara said.

I tried to concentrate on breathing. I tried not to thrust so much. Tanya slowed to.

“Look into each other’s eyes.”

I looked up at Tanya and she looked down. We both felt desperate for each other, for release.

“Now, Joe and Tanya, you love each other, and the person you love is with you right now. Your more sensitive, vulnerable parts are together. You will lose control to each other. Tanya is open and fertile, and Joe, you’re inside her and you are just as fertile. In just a minute you will both feel so good together.”

Sara paused.

“Now, for just a few seconds, just look at each other.”

Struggling not to move, Tanya and I stared into each other’s eyes. We were floating together into another world.

“Now, just like you did before, caress each other’s chests, just gently.”

I reached up to Tanya’s breasts, and brushed them. Tanya touched just one of my nipples, and I almost exploded in her just then.

“You can move again, if you want,” Sara said.

Tanya began to rock slowly. I tried to stay still, and just watch her, caressing her breasts. Tanya hummed, “Mmm, oh, mmmm,” and began closing her eyes.

“Tanya, you can kiss Joe.”

Tanya leaned forward, her breasts dangling onto my chest. I wrapped my arms around her back in an embrace. She kissed me on the lips, her eyes opening only briefly.

Sara spoke as we kissed. “Right now, Tanya, your vagina is getting tighter and your are moving in a way that is making Joe more and more aroused. You are probably both close to the plateau stage. When you reach that, Joe’s penis will expand so that you will feel even more sensitive and open to him. Your vagina will tighten on him, and you will probably both thrust and hold each other as close as possible.”

Then Tanya broke the kiss as her back seemed to arch involuntarily. Her chest pressed into me, and she thrust her head forward. The movement of her hips became more intense.

Sara spoke in a soft voice. “Now, both of you, just let it go.”

Tanya clutched me with her arms, her breasts pressing into my chest, and her head pulled back, her partly open just above my nose. She moaned, louder and louder.

“Oh, oh,”

I hugged her to me.

Her legs, still bent at the knee as she straddled me, squeezed my hips. Her vagina clung to my penis, becoming both tighter and slicker every moment. Tanya thrust her hips, her vagina, up and down along my penis, which was so sensitive. Just the slightest touch and I would lose control.

“Oh, Tanya …”

She thrust faster and faster.

My hands moved down to her butt, and Tanya moved faster. I rocked my hips back at her.

I thought about how fertile we were, right at that moment, right at that moment of potential creation. With Tanya’s next thrust down I felt my pleasure boil over, the burning pressure building beyond my ability to control.

“I could get pregnant,” Tanya said, in a whisper. Then she screamed, “Oh my God!” She pressed her vagina down on me, her hips locking with mine.

I clutched Tanya’s hips and held her to me. My feet came up, and then pressed down again into the mattress, with my knees bent, I felt a sudden urge to push myself into her even farther. I lifted my hips toward her, lifting her off the bed, and pushing me into her deeper.

“Oh!” she cried, her head and chest coming up, her eyes clenched shut.

And right at that moment I couldn’t control it any more. I exploded, pleasure flowing out of me. “Tanya, Tanya!” I felt each pulse, fluid squeezing from me and into her.

“Oh, oh, oh God. Joe, Oh God!”

We came back down to the mattress, and Tanya leaned back onto me, holding me. I thrust again. Waves of release. Pulse after pulse. I was gripping her. I didn’t want her to go anywhere. I had never before wanted anyone so close to me. I wanted her to stay so close.

“Oh, Joe, oh, I feel it.”

Her thrusts and mine gradually slowed down, becoming a gentle rocking.

“You’re pulsing, Joe,” she said.

“I’m so sensitive,” I said.

“I know, I know.”

We slowly came to be still, our arms and legs wrapped around each other. Tanya lifted her head just enough to look into my eyes, and smiled.

Then we remembered Sara was still here. “So, you two, that is how to begin to enjoy sex. And I think you’re ready for a great summer.”

We laughed, exhausted.