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Ruthie (Mf, incest, cons, pedo)
Windy City Freedom
Ruthie Barker was the girl who made me forget my inhibitions
long enough to ask her if she wanted to meet someone new. When she said
sure and told me where she lived, I said I'd ride home with her and walk
back to get my car. She stopped in front of a brick house and turned off
the lights.
"This is where you live?" I asked. She said no and pointed to a
white two-story house with the second story porch roof beginning to sag.
"I live there, but my Dad wouldn't like it if a guy brought me
home." I looked at her. It was too dark to see now, but at the store I
had seen the long, straight shiny blonde hair that curled up at the
bottom and framed a soft face with tiny features. I had seen the white
ankles that made you want to take off her shoes. This was no teenager,
and I didn't get it.
"Ruthie, how old are you?"
"Twenty-three," she responded.
"And your father doesn't allow you to date?"
I could feel her looking at me. "You must be the only guy in
town who doesn't know about me," she whispered.
"Know what?" I responded.
"If we're gonna see each other at all, you need to know so I'll
tell you now. I'd like to be with you, but you need to know this about
me because it's not going to change even if you still want to see me."
"Go on."
"Okay," she sighed. "My father and I sleep together. That's why
I don't get asked out -- everybody here knows. No, don't say anything,
let me tell it all. It started when I was twelve and my mother worked as
a nurse at night. At first my Daddy just came into my room after I was
in my PJs, and he sat at the bottom of the bed and talked to me. While
he talked, he played with my feet. He didn't tickle, I think of it now
as a gentle caress that he did with his hands. It felt good, in fact, it
made me feel a little funny but I didn't know why. And we just talked. I
really loved my Dad..."
And she told me:
I'll never forget the night he started things going further. I
had on a pink nightie, kind of thin and short because it was hot. I
didn't have any covers on, either. When he came in, he just looked at me
for a while and smiled. I moved my feet so he could sit down, but
instead he sat down beside me. We talked some and he was smiling, then
he put his hand on my tummy. I felt kind of strange because he didn't
seem like he was trying to tickle me, just caressing me like he did with
my feet. When he moved his hand up to my left breast he just kept on
talking like nothing had changed, and I was so shocked that I just kept
listening. Usually we talked about all kinds of different things but
when he started touching my breast and saw that I was going to let him
do it...
Jack, I was so surprised and confused that I was scared to say
anything. Then he started talking in the same calm tone about how much
he loved me and loved touching me and he never wanted anything to happen
so that we couldn't have what he called 'our times together.' I didn't
know what to do, so I said, "Me too, Daddy," and that's when he started
to put his hand inside. I was frozen and I was scared but I didn't do
anything.
I started to feel guilty.
Jack, the first few times I felt so guilty about it all because,
even at twelve, I knew it was wrong, but I liked it! It felt good, and I
liked it.
Anyway, on that first night, after he put his hand inside, I
could feel his fingers on my breast. I had fairly big ones for being
twelve, but I hadn't really thought about letting anybody touch them. I
thought my parents would kill me. And there I was with my father playing
with my left breast. When he saw I wasn't going to do anything, he
really started to get serious then. He unbuttoned the buttons and pulled
them back so he could see.
"Ruthie!" he said to me, "you're as big as your mother," which I
wasn't, and then he said, "and much prettier." I was trying to get up
enough courage to say, "Daddy, should we be doing this?" when he started
kissing them. Oh, Jack, I was so scared, but I liked it and it felt
good, and I didn't want to ruin our times, so I let him do what he
wanted.
And I was also getting excited. I just couldn't help it, he was
so good, and I loved him because he was my Daddy, and I knew he
shouldn't be doing it and I felt guilty because I was letting him, but I
couldn't stop because it felt too good. He lay down on top of me and
just licked and sucked my breasts until I was really aroused. He was
rubbing against my inside legs, too, and I could feel that it was wet
down there, and my nipples were real hard, and my breasts felt like they
were swollen.
When he finally got up and asked me to take off my nightie, I
just stared, speechless, so he started to take it off -- and again, I
let him do it. I was really scared then because I didn't know what he
was going to do and I was also really aroused.
He lay down beside me and kind of pulled me sideways to him so
he could put my breast back in his mouth, but then he put his hand down
between my legs.
When he first started to rub my hole with his fingers, I thought
I was going crazy. There I was, a totally sexually inexperienced twelve-
year-old girl, and my father was doing things to me I didn't know
existed, and a part of me wanted to run, and a part of me was so totally
turned on that I couldn't believe it.
He rubbed what he called my button, then he put his finger in
the hole, and all that time he sucked and licked at my nipples. From
that very first night, I found out that I have incredibly sensitive
nipples, and it's real easy to turn me on if you play with them with
your tongue.
After a while I started having these jerks between my legs that
I couldn't control, and my breath got shorter and shorter. I remember
thinking that I was moaning and I didn't know why, but I couldn't help
it.
He knew I couldn't do anything to stop him then -- he knew I was
about to come even though I didn't have any idea what was about to
happen. He jumped up on the bed and put his face down there and started
sucking on my button and pushing at it with his tongue.
I think I was almost unconscious, I was so overwhelmed with all
these feelings and then I heard myself moaning, "Lick it harder, Daddy,"
and I was pushing up off the bed at him and then everything in the world
exploded.
Oh, Jack, my first orgasm was so incredibly good! I was so out
of control that all my guilt was just overpowered by that orgasm. I came
and came for what seemed like several minutes. When it was finally over,
I was so exhausted that I almost fell asleep with Daddy still between my
legs. He raised up, and came up beside me, and kissed me on the cheek
and started playing with my hair, and he was saying things like "You're
so beautiful, Ruthie" and "I love you so much, Ruthie" and I finally
raised up and kissed him and said, "I love you, too, Daddy, but I'm so
tired." He said, "Okay, honey, I'll see you tomorrow" and he got up and
left. I was so drained that I was probably asleep by the time he got to
the door.
I didn't know what to say, but I knew that my dick was aching,
it was so hard. Her story had made me so horny that I was about to jump
on her but instead, she slipped across the seat and into my arms. I
wanted to kiss her so badly that I couldn't stand it, but she pushed my
head away.
"If you're holding me like this, then you don't feel like the
others. They either laughed at me or were mean to me or -- usually --
just ignored me. But I have to finish telling you about me."
"I don't care," I tried to nuzzle against her ear. "Right now, I
just want to touch you and love you and kiss you."
But she wasn't ready yet. I think that now that she had found a
sympathetic audience, she had some guilt to spill out. She did kiss me
lightly on the mouth, but then she said, "We have all the time in the
world to do what we want, and I know places, but I have to finish so you
know what kind of girl you're getting."
I sighed. By this time, I had my hand on her left breast and she
let it stay, but I couldn't feel much because she had a jacket on. "We
can play with each other while I talk, okay? But I've got to tell it."
Saying that, she pulled her coat open so I could get at her and as she
started again, she began to try to get my swollen dick out -- and kept
talking:
The next day, I was tired and scared and really upset. I didn't
want to go to school because I thought everybody would be able to look
at me and see that I was different and know what had happened. But I
couldn't think of any excuse my mother would believe so I got on the
bus. When nobody acted like anything was different, I went on to school
and stayed.
By this time, Ruthie had my dick out of my pants and was doing
incredible things to it with her long, thin fingers. Sometimes she
caressed it so lightly that I wasn't sure she was even touching it;
other times she pulled it with long firm strokes. I had her shirt
halfway open and was doing everything I knew to turn her on with my
fingers -- she wasn't letting me get my mouth on her nipples yet -- but
my caresses were amateur blunders compared to her skill. A dozen times I
thought I would come, but each time she settled me down, only to start
up again after I relaxed a little. The pain in my balls was starting to
grow and I knew that sometime that night, I was going to have to come,
even if I had to do it myself. What I wanted was for her to lower her
sweet mouth over my dick and let me shoot everything I had down her
throat. But she was still full of talk, so I waited, as much turned on
by her story as by her -- and she was far from finished with telling me
her story:
I decided at school that I had to talk to Daddy when he came to
my room that night. I had decided to put on something really plain
because the more I thought about it, the more I realized that I had been
dressing to turn him on, even though I hadn't meant to. I wanted to tell
him I hadn't meant to dress like that and that I was scared and felt
really guilty and I didn't think we ought to do that kind of stuff
anymore. The worst thing of all was that I just couldn't lie to myself,
and I knew that I had liked it while it was going on.
I really didn't want it to happen again. but I was afraid that
if I let it start, then I would want it and not be able to stop it.
See, the thing was, I didn't blame my Daddy, or hate him or
anything. I still loved my Daddy very much, I just felt like I had done
stuff to make him think that I wanted to do things like we had done last
night and I had decided that at bedtime, I was going to explain it to
him.
He was way ahead of me, though, and I never got my chance. I had
gotten out of my bath and was drying off when he slipped into the
bathroom, and I didn't even hear him until his arms went around me from
behind. I jumped and dropped the towel, and each of his hands took one
of my breasts. My heart started beating really fast and I kept saying to
myself, "Slow down, Ruthie, and tell him," but while I tried to think of
what to say, he was already starting to turn me on. One hand went down
between my legs and as I finally started to try and tell him, I totally
lost my cool when I realized he was naked too.
I had seen pictures of guys' dicks. Even at twelve, I knew what
he was pushing between my legs from behind. He was moving it around and
rubbing me with it in some places while his fingers were touching other
places and the shock of my Daddy's dick touching me down there just took
my breath away and my thinking away so that I couldn't do anything but
stand there naked while he got me hot again.
And I have to tell you, it didn't take long. He was really good
with his fingers, and sometimes he would push his dick up so that the
tip was at my back hole. I was scared to death that he was going to try
to put it in there, but feeling it touching me there just drove me
absolutely wild. After a while, I was so turned on that I started
thinking what it would be like if he did put it in there but even
through all this, I trusted my Daddy and figured that he would know the
right thing to do.
He did, too. He was playing with me in three places where a girl
is most sensitive and I don't know what turned me on the most, his
fingers squeezing my little nipple like they squeezed his cigarettes, or
his other hand playing with my button or his dick playing with my back
hole. I think that after a while, the tip did start to go inside, but he
never pushed enough to hurt, just enough to feel good. I couldn't help
it; I came just as hard as I had the previous night and I heard myself
repeating over and over, not conscious that I was speaking, "Don't stop
Daddy, don't stop."
After I came, he just held me in his arms. My guilt was on hold
because I felt so good. I felt totally fulfilled and I also felt a love
for my Daddy, who had made me feel that way. I just couldn't help it,
the pleasure was so good that there was no room for anything else but
love. I felt something else, too, and that made just a little bit of
guilt come back, but I felt it anyway. I felt like I wanted to see my
Daddy naked, I wanted to see his dick, and I might even want to touch
it. But for then, I was so tired that I just stood there and let him
hold me. If he had let go, I think I would have fallen over.
We stood there for what must have been five minutes. I was a
limp rag doll and he held and cuddled me. Finally he turned me around to
face him. I was looking at him now but he was holding me so tightly that
I couldn't see anything but his chest. But I could feel his dick pushing
in on my stomach and it was still real hard. My breasts were flattened
against his lower chest and he held me real tight, almost as if he
weren't ready for me to see. Then, he slid down my body, kissing at my
breasts and stomach until he was on his knees.
I knew what he was going to do then and almost cried out for him
to stop but his face was between my legs and his tongue was playing
round like it wanted to get up my front hole. I knew then that I had
wanted him to do more. Even as he sucked at me, I could feel guilt and
shame. I wanted to tell him that I didn't want him to do this and that
he should stop. But the feelings and the sounds of slurping were driving
me crazy again and I knew I wouldn't say a word, at least not until he
was finished.
My back was against the sink and my body curved in a backward
arc as I pushed myself at Daddy so he could suck harder. Remember, I was
twelve and this was only my second time, but it was already beginning to
dawn in my mind what he was doing. For a while he would really try to
make me come by sucking my button or playing with it with his lips or
his teeth. Then, as I got hotter, he would back off and not let me
finish. He was playing with me and making me want it, and it was driving
me absolutely crazy. The sucking sounds and the slurping as he licked
his tongue across my hole, and the sucking sound when he sucked at my
hole like he wanted something to come out were making things even worse.
I had totally lost control again. Finally, I grabbed his head in my
hands and started screaming, "Come on Daddy, make me do it!" because I
didn't even know what to call it yet but I needed it, yes I needed him
to make it happen.
He was sucking on my button now and I knew I was getting close
again. I didn't want him to stop this time, I didn't want him to play
with me anymore, I really needed it this time. I was up on the tips of
my toes, bracing my back against the sink and pushing out my legs at
him. I started thrusting my hips sharply at his face, and I pulled his
face against my hole. "Come on Daddy, finish me this time, please finish
me, come on Daddy!" and then I was gone, my hips still pushing back and
forth but completely beyond my control now. If the first two orgasms
were good, this one was harder and better. He had made me want it so
badly, and I had helped make it happen by moving my own body.
As silly as it may sound, that still seems to me to be one of
the strongest orgasms I ever had, though maybe it was just the first
really good one. I didn't want it to stop, and then for a while, I
didn't think it was going to, and that was okay too, to just come and
come with Daddy sucking on me.
When it finally did start to slow down, I was so weak that I
couldn't stand up and I sank down into Daddy's lap. I cuddled up against
him. Then for a minute I was awake again because I knew that my hand had
brushed against his dick and I tried to move my hand so that I would
touch it again, but Daddy picked me up in his arms and carried me into
my bedroom. I hardly had the energy to say goodnight, but as he brushed
my hair back and covered me up, still naked, I remember what I said to
him. I said, "Thank you, Daddy."
I was so turned on by her and her story that the fact that she
was talking about incest and enjoying it made no difference to. It was
like she was all talked out now, and we just sat there while she drove
my dick crazy with her fingers. She looked up at me and said, "Now, do
you still want to see me again?"
"And again and again," I answered and that was when she first
kissed me. It wasn't a long kiss but it was incredible one. "Jack, I
have to go in, he'll be waiting." I started to protest but she put her
fingers to my lips and whispered gently, "You need to get off, don't
you?"
I nodded silently. She kissed me again and lowered her head to
my lap. My cock slipped into her mouth as soundlessly and gently as into
water and Ruthie began to suck. I could tell this was to be no long
teaser. Ruthie wanted to go in and see her Daddy, but she apparently
cared enough about me to let it wait a little while. Her mouth was like
a sucking machine, and she had no trouble letting my whole dick slip
down into her mouth when she wanted to. I could feel her lips on my
pubic hair at times, but with the pressure and the urgency of her
sucking, I couldn't hold out. When it came it was painful because the
spurts were so strong that I had no control. I thought I must be choking
her but she just buried it to the hilt and rubbed it with her tongue
until I finally was empty.
I was as empty as I had ever been. Ruthie popped back up, kissed
me and said, "When we have time, I can do better than that. I'll see you
at the store tomorrow night. Bye."
I could only respond, "Don't forget" as I slipped out of the
car. I stood there as she moved on up to her house. She didn't know I
had stayed but she popped out of the car and bounced into the house. I
couldn't help but notice the enthusiasm and as I walked back to my car I
kept thinking, "I wonder if she has him in her mouth now?"
But I also planned to be at the store the next night.
RUTHIE TWO
After my incredible first experience with Ruthie, I was so horny
that I went home and must have jacked off a half a dozen times while
imagining what Ruthie and her father might be doing at that moment.
Still unable to sleep, I got in my car and drove over to her house, but
all the lights were off. Still, I jacked off again in the car. Finally
exhausted, I went home and fell asleep. I was so anxious to see Ruthie
that I got to the store extra early the next night. I was anticipating
being with her so much that it never even crossed my mind that she might
not come.
She didn't. I waited almost two hours in the parking lot, sure
that each car would be hers, but she never came.
Finally, about ten o'clock, I drove to her house and parked
across the street. Lights were on upstairs, and I just stared, waiting
for something to happen and wondering what to do. About eleven, the
lights went out and that's when I began to get mad. I felt that Ruthie
had used me to spill her guilt, willing to trade one sweet blow job in
return, while she had fascinated me to the point of obsession. I finally
drove home, got drunk and went to bed.
The next morning about ten, I was drinking coffee and nursing a
hangover when she knocked at the door. I didn't know how she had found
my house, but I knew she had, and I was irrationally certain that it was
she at the door. It was.
She looked like a virgin dressed for church, in a pale blue
dress and white heels. Her blonde hair hung below her shoulders and I
would have attacked her on the spot if I had followed my first impulse.
Instead, in answer to her beautiful smile and silence, I simply said
"Come in."
"I'm really sorry about last night," she started out. "I
couldn't help it. He took me out to dinner, and we spent the evening
together. But I thought about you." One thing was for sure -- any guilt
Ruthie had ever had about sleeping with her father was gone now. She
talked about it as if it were an every day thing (which, of course, it
was).
"I hope you had a good time," I played for time, being carefully
neutral.
"Jack, I've told you, it's not going to change. I'm going to be
there for him when he wants me. If you want me, too, then I'll be there
for you when I can." Then she smiled sweetly. "He's working today until
five so I have to be home by four-thirty." Then she was molding her body
against me, and kissing me as a child sucks the juice from a ripe
orange. She started licking my ear and whispered, "I'd like to get in
bed with you now." I needed no convincing. I took her hand and led her
up the steps to be bedroom. Not speaking, we lay down beside each other,
me in my tacky blue bathrobe and Ruthie in her pale blue dress. The
shoes had disappeared.
For a while we just touched and kissed and learned about each
other, then Ruthie stood and pulled her dress over her head and tossed
it aside. There was nothing else left, just Ruthie, and my dick jerked
as I first gazed at her naked body. There wasn't an ounce of fat, but
she didn't look skinny either, just a mature young woman with absolutely
perfect proportions. I am turned on by nipples, and seeing Ruthie's were
like looking at one of my fantasies. Her nipples were a pale but true
pink, not much larger than a pencil eraser but with definite form. Her
aureolae were about the size of a quarter, small but in perfect
proportion to the nipples. The nipples were those of a young girl, but
the full breasts said that this was a woman. Her stomach was flat and
her light pubic bush was small. I don't think she cut it; it just grew
that way. Her hips were thin, and what I could see of her legs made me
assume they were the same perfect proportion.
As she climbed back on the bed, she pulled open my bathrobe, and
placed herself astride me. I guess Ruthie was used to sex without any
hang-ups, because she took my dick in her hand and, without a word,
slipped it inside her. And then, holding my cock inside her velvet
pussy, she continued her story.
"After what I told you, about that night..."
I was really confused and scared. The next night, I put off
going to bed, staying up and studying, but I finally got tired. I got
undressed and got into bed and waited for Daddy, not sure how or if I
could handle him. It wasn't a problem because he didn't come. I waited
and waited and he didn't come. Finally I couldn't stand it anymore so I
got up and tiptoed to his bedroom.
He was lying on his bed, his hands behind his head, staring at
the ceiling.
"Daddy," I whispered. "Are you all right?"
He turned and smiled at me. "Hi, honey. Come on in."
I was scared, but I approached the bed and knelt by it. He
looked at me searchingly. "Ruthie," he began. "I want to know, and I
want you to be honest. We have been doing some new things. If you feel
uncomfortable about them, then tell me. Do you want to keep on or do you
want things to change between us?"
I had no idea how to handle that question. I was so mixed up.
The end of his sentence -- "Do you want things to change between us?" --
really scared me. My Daddy had always been my best friend. I was
confused about what he was doing to me, but I thought anything would be
better than losing my best friend. For lack of a better response, I
simply said, "I don't want things to change between us."
He nodded and smiled. "Okay, honey, I understand. Why don't you
take off your nightgown and we'll just snuggle a while together." After
all the things we had done, simply being naked with him didn't seem too
bad, so I slipped the gown over my head and crawled in. The first thing
I realized was that Daddy was naked. I could feel all of his hot body
against mine. I hate to say it, Jack, but I liked the feeling. I liked
it a lot.
Daddy began to kiss my neck, then he pulled the covers back and
began to play with my breasts. My need for reassurance overcame my fear,
and I lay there enjoying his tongue on my nipples. His hand went down my
stomach and stopped between my legs but he just teased me this time, no
serious playing. There was a question I had to ask:
"Daddy, how come you don't want me to touch you, too?" He
stopped playing with me, raised up, and looked into my eyes.
"Is that what you want?" he asked.
"I dunno," I replied. "I guess I just wondered."
"If you're sure, then just put your hand down there and you'll
find me. But if you do touch me, I'll want you to do the same thing to
me that I do to you -- with my mouth. If you're ready, you can make me
feel good with your mouth just like I make you feel good. But don't
start unless you are ready."
I vaguely knew what he wanted me to do. I had heard about girls
sucking on boy's dicks. I even had a girl friend who claimed that she
sucked her brother's dick every night, although I didn't believe it. But
I had seen Daddy's dick before when I peeked in the bathroom while he
was taking a bath, and it didn't scare me all that much, so I reached
down and found him.
Daddy jumped when my hand touched his dick, and I didn't find
what I thought I was going to find at all. Instead of a floppy little
thing like a sausage, what I had my hand on was a thick stiff curved rod
that jerked when I touched it. My question came out unbidden.
"What's the matter with it? Why is it so big?"
He cuddled me against him, but I kept my hand around it.
"Ruthie, honey, when a man gets in a sexy mood, it grows big like that.
Do you know about making love?"
I really didn't, so I shook my head.
"Sugar," he started, "when a man and a woman have sex, the man
puts his dick into the woman's hole...down here." With that, he touched
my hole. I shuddered. I couldn't imagine anything that huge going up
inside me. "He puts it up inside her, and he shoots out some juice
inside her that makes her have a baby. But that's not the only reason
they do it. They do it because it feels good. It feels better than when
I kiss you down there. But you're not old enough for that yet."
I couldn't imagine anything feeling better than Daddy kissing me
down there, but I was glad he thought I wasn't old enough, because I was
terrified of him trying to put that thing up in my hole.
He went on. "Maybe some day we'll do that; when you're older,
and if you want to. For now, I only want you to kiss me the way I kiss
you. It feels good to a man if a girl puts his dick in her mouth and
sucks it like a popsicle. Do you think you could do that?"
I had to stop her. For some time, Ruthie had been controlling me
like a puppet. I said she had a velvet pussy, but she could contract her
muscles around me with a strong grip. She would ride me like a pony for
a while, then -- when she thought I was getting close -- she would back
off, which was frustrating me and teasing me and turning me on so much I
couldn't stop her. But now I couldn't hold it any longer.
"Wait a minute, Ruthie," I panted. "I need to know if you're on
the pill because I'm going off now."
She just smiled, stopped talking for a minute, and increased her
pressure and movement to a higher level. She was milking me like a cow
and the pressure built until I finally exploded, sending wave after wave
of my juice into her incredible body.
As I emptied my balls into Ruthie, she leaned forward, her
blonde hair cascading down on my chest, her breasts hanging forward, and
she pulled my head up to her nipples. Wishing I could suck both, I
closed my mouth around her right breast and sucked like a baby. I had
never had such a strong need to come inside a girl. The pleasure was
intense and the need to let it out was so strong that there was actually
pain along with the pleasure. To be honest, I was almost glad when it
was over because the pain and intensity of it had scared me just a
little.
When she sensed that I was finished, she raised up, slipping me
out of her, and lay down beside me. She offered her mouth to me and gave
me a few soft kisses, then raised up to look me in the eye.
"Thank you," she whispered. "I wanted you to enjoy it."
"I did," I responded. "It was the best one I ever had."
"Why don't you turn over and I'll rub your back," she smiled.
Ruthie was as talented at back massage as she was sex. As much
as she had turned me on earlier, now she relaxed me with her talented
hands. And as she massaged, she began to talk again about her Daddy:
It was so weird, Jack. There we were in bed, and I was still
thinking that this shouldn't be happening, but Daddy was doing things to
my breasts that felt so good that I couldn't bring myself to make him
stop. And I was lying there with his dick in my hand. Remember, I still
hadn't seen it, just touched it. I didn't know if I wanted to try to
suck it or not, but he had told me that he wanted me to if I touched it,
and I didn't want to stop touching it. Every once in a while, it would
jerk and seem to get a little bigger. I thought about what it might feel
like to have him put it inside me and I knew that I was terrified of
that. Yet as we lay there together, I also realized that it was going to
happen. Sooner or later, Daddy would put his dick inside me, and I knew
something else. Even though I didn't want him to do it then, when the
time came I would want him to. I thought that maybe, someday, I might
even ask him to do it.
Finally he spoke to me. "Ruthie, do you think you can make me
feel good with your mouth like I did to you? Do you think you can suck
it?"
I couldn't tell him how scared I was, so I just said, "Daddy, if
you want me to, I'll try."
He looked at me and I felt love and understanding. "Take it
slow, honey, because I want you to enjoy it, too. Don't rush it. When
you're ready, just slip it in your mouth and pretend it's a popsicle."
He waited while I pulled the covers down to reveal his dick for
the first time. Jack, I don't know how to describe what I felt when I
first saw it, other than to say I was fascinated. It really didn't look
like something I would want to put in my mouth, but the thought didn't
gross me out, either. I was just fascinated. I slipped down in the bed
until my face was even with his dick. It smelled fresh and clean. One
thing about my father, I have never gone to bed with him when he wasn't
clean.
I decided that I might start by licking it with my tongue, and
if I didn't like that, I'd tell him. So, I started licking around my
Daddy's dick. When it jerked, it reminded me of my jerks when he was
kissing me. It seemed to jerk most when I licked underneath. To tell the
truth, licking it didn't particularly excite me, but it wasn't so bad.
But I knew that he really wanted me to put it in my mouth. I knew I
couldn't get it in very far, but I could suck the tip. So I scrunched up
my courage and said to myself, "Do it, Ruthie, it's what he wants and he
loves you."
I slipped the tip of my Daddy's dick into my mouth.
I liked it. I really did. The feeling of Daddy's dick inside me
was pleasant. It was more than pleasant -- it made me feel funny like
when he kissed my button. I sucked and licked it with my tongue. And I
tried to get more of it in my mouth. It was jerking and I liked that,
too. I decided I would do what he had said: suck it like a popsicle. The
feeling was nice, and I sucked on him, knowing it was wrong and not
caring.
Suddenly he interrupted me. He had begun to push off the bed,
but now he said, "Ruthie, stop now. I'm going to come." I remembered
what he said about shooting his juices, and I didn't want to get
pregnant. I was enjoying it, but I stopped when he told me to.
"Rub it with your hand, up and down," he whispered. I took it in
my hand and rubbed up and down like he said. "Faster," he moaned, and I
did it as hard as I could. I had never seen come before, but suddenly, a
white cream shot out of his dick, all over his stomach, and some of it
got in my hair.
"Oh, Ruthie, honey, that was so good, you are so beautiful," he
gasped as he lay back. I could see that he was really tired, which was
curious. I knew that he had come, and I knew that after he made me come,
I was really turned on, but he seemed like he was tired. I hate to say
it, but I was a little disappointed, because I was hoping that he would
lick me down there, too.
Instead, we just cuddled against each other. I could tell that
he was really relaxed and happy, so I was, too. Then, after a while, he
turned on his side, and pulled me closer to him. I jumped when his dick
first touched my pussy, but he put his hand down on it, and rubbed it
back and forth against me. The feelings I was having then were
incredibly strong. I was scared to death that he was going to try to put
it inside me, but I also was so turned on by Daddy's dick rubbing across
my hole that if he wanted to, I wouldn't stop him. He didn't put it in
me for six more months, but if he had wanted to that night, I would have
let him. Right then, I didn't care if he made a baby in me or not, I
would have let him.
Instead, he just kept rubbing me with his dick and his fingers,
and I knew I was going to come soon, and I did. It wasn't a super
orgasm, but I guess I'd describe it as a good, warm, loving one. I felt
good, and I loved my Daddy, and that night I fell asleep in his arms. I
felt no guilt that night.
I was so relaxed by what this young woman was doing to my back
that I might have fallen asleep if her story hadn't turned me on so
much. The truth was, I was hard again, and it was a hard that was so
strong that it hurt.
"Ruthie," I said, turning over. "I don't want to force you, but
I need you. Do you think you could suck me a little bit?"
She smiled, flipped her head back so her hair was out of her
eyes and replied, "Jack, you tell me what you want, and I will do it."
I wasn't used to submissive girls who only wanted to please, but
I like the feeling, so I said, "I'd like it if you would suck me a
little."
When Ruthie told me the other night that she could do better
when she had time, she wasn't kidding. She might have had trouble
getting her father's dick in her mouth that first night, but she had no
trouble with mine. I had heard of girls who could relax their throats to
the point that they could let a dick slip completely into their mouth,
but I had never met one until Ruthie. I'm not real small, but when she
bent her head over my dick and took it into her mouth, it disappeared to
the base. I could feel that I must be half way down her throat, but it
didn't bother her at all. I could tell she was trying hard to make me
feel good, and she did.
She kept up a steady sucking pressure but at the same time, her
tongue was all over my dick, first the head, then all around the sides.
Meanwhile, she tickled my balls with one hand, and with the other hand,
she put one finger up my ass, and moved it in and out. She even added
sound effects with the rest.
She moaned and sighed, seeming to enjoy me like no girl I had
ever met. I couldn't help it. I took her head in my hands and begin to
fuck her mouth. She allowed me to do what I wanted and I plunged deep
into her throat, time after time, with her tongue still going.
At last I shot deep into her mouth. Wave after wave poured down
Ruthie's throat, and she drank it like water and sucked as though she
wanted more. Looking down at this young blond girl begging for my dick
and sucking like she wanted to swallow it just about drove me insane.
When my dick finally stopped shooting, I felt as empty as I ever had
felt in my life. I also felt like I couldn't do without Ruthie, I needed
her, and if the price was hearing her guilt trip, then I would listen
all day.
We snuggled together, her head on my shoulder. I played with her
breasts for a while and for once, she didn't talk. Somewhere along the
line, I must have fallen asleep, because when I awoke several hours
later, there was the sweet smell of Ruthie in my bed, but she was gone.
RUTHIE THREE
I said earlier that I was almost obsessed by Ruthie. Now I tell
you: After that afternoon with her, I was obsessed -- totally. She was
never out of my mind for very long, and the sweet fragrance of her sex
hung above my bed like an invisible cloud. I wanted to call her, but I
didn't know her number. I wanted to visit her, but I was afraid to go to
the door, fearing that her father would answer my knock. I don't know if
I was in love or in lust with her, but I knew that I was totally hung up
on this incredibly sweet 23-year-old woman who talked about fucking her
father as if everyone did it.
The next night, I went out with one of my girlfriends, brought
her home, and went to bed with her. But I could only get off by thinking
about Ruthie. It was a relationship that I had absolutely no control
over, and I was so deeply engrossed in her that I tried to content
myself with waiting for her next contact. I didn't see her for three
days, and they were three of the longest days of my life.
When the knock at the door came, about 7 P.M., I scrambled to
open the door, hoping that it might be she. Perhaps the gods really do
reward those who wait patiently, because it was.
"Hi, Jack," she said lightly, brushing past me and into the
room. "I missed you."
I wanted to scream at her about how I had missed her and demand
to know where had she been, but Ruthie didn't play those games. Instead,
I came to her, took her in my arms and said softly, "Oh, honey, I've
missed you, too. I'm glad to see you. God, Ruthie, I've missed you."
Our mouths met. Her taste was sweet and fresh, and her mouth
opened freely to admit my tongue. She sucked on it and tickled it with
her own while her hands wandered up and down my back and finally came to
rest on my ass, which she pulled forward towards her, grinding herself
against my hard dick.
Finally, she broke off the kiss. I tried to pull her back but
she skipped away from me. "Know what I'd like to do tonight?" she
teased.
"Anything is okay with me," I responded, moving towards her.
"I want to take a ride. I want to ride out in the country. Can
we go for a ride, Jack?"
It wasn't what I had in mind, but being with her was better than
being without her so I said, "Sure we can. When do you have to be home?"
"Probably around eleven. I told him I was going to the library
and to see a girlfriend. Eleven ought to be safe."
I had figured that taking a ride with Ruthie was the last thing
I wanted, but I was wrong again. Before we got out of the driveway, she
was opening my pants. She said not a word, just took out my dick. As I
headed out of town, half out of my mind, Ruthie took my dick in her
mouth and began to suck. She did things to my balls while she sucked
that made it difficult to stay on the road. Once, on the way out of
town, I pulled up to a red light and there was a cop in the other lane.
I was glad he couldn't see what was going on in my lap, because Ruthie
was sucking me like a vacuum cleaner. Finally, we drove to a dark road,
and I found a place to pull over, next to a corn field. The fact that I
had been concentrating on my driving had kept me from coming, but once
parked, I lay back and waited. It wasn't long.
My cock seemed to swell to twice its normal size, and then I was
coming, squirting, shooting, emptying myself in the sweet mouth of this
incredible young woman. It was all I could do to keep from taking her
head in my hands and thrusting my dick down her throat. The "ah" and
"uh" sounds that came from me as I shuddered from the force of my need
were purely instinctive. She was a living force that controlled me.
Coming in Ruthie is a very draining experience, in more ways that one.
After three days of waiting, it was worth it.
She raised up beside me. "I love the feel of your dick in my
mouth, Jack. I love it when you come. It's so neat to drink your come
and know that I made you do it." Ruthie obviously wanted to have control
over a man, perhaps because a man had always had control over her. I
didn't care. I would take whatever she had to offer. She could have
control of me completely.
"Let's get out," she said suddenly. "Let's walk for a while."
So, we got out of the car and began to walk down the road. We discovered
a small lake, really just a pond from the damming of a stream.
"I want to go swimming," she said, suddenly. "Come on, Jack,
let's go swimming." Thoughts of water snakes went through my mind, but
Ruthie was already halfway out of her clothes, so I stripped quickly. We
took each other's hands and waded into the pond. It was cold but it
didn't seem to bother her, so I tried to control my shivering and went
on in.
Ruthie suddenly disappeared beneath the surface. I panicked for
a moment, but then her hands encircled my waist and her mouth closed
over my dick. I stood there, seemingly alone in the pond, while just
beneath the surface a water nymph was milking my cock with her sweet
mouth. It was a very strange feeling. I wanted it to continue forever,
but Ruthie finally ran out of air and surfaced. Still, I was hard again,
and excited again. I wanted her again, I couldn't help it. I was no
longer cold.
I pulled her slim body towards me. We were almost up to her neck
in the water but she came to me willingly. I took my cock in my hand and
glided it into her pussy. She was ready, and I entered her easily. She
was floating now, her legs wrapped around my hips, and I fucked her with
long, slow strokes that felt wonderful. And as I fucked her in the water
in the soft twilight of the unknown farmer's pond, incredibly, she began
to talk about her father again...
I think my Daddy knew he could do anything he wanted to after I
sucked him that night. After that, we did it a lot in my bed. He would
come in, and I was always naked, waiting for him. I still knew that what
we were doing was wrong, but no longer cared. I just wanted him to do
me. And I did him every night, too. He played with my breasts a whole
lot. They really seemed to turn him on. He was always telling me how
beautiful they were and how big they were. I knew they weren't all that
big, because I had looked at some of the other girls at gym class in the
shower. A lot of girls in my class had bigger ones than mine, but some
were still pretty flat. I was glad that I wasn't like that, because then
Daddy wouldn't have had anything to play with. Somehow my breasts always
got him going. Even on nights when he was tired, if I wanted to do it, I
would just go find him and unbutton my shirt. Once he saw them, Jack, he
couldn't keep his hands off them.
He taught me things that a girl could do with her mouth to make
a man feel good. But sometimes I thought up things of my own, and that
always surprised him. He loved it when I came up with a new trick.
I remember the first time he came inside my mouth. By then, I
had seen him come lots of times and I had even tasted his come, because
he asked me to lick it off his stomach. It was warm and tasted really
salty. I didn't love the taste, but I didn't dislike it, either. And I
knew it was what he wanted me to do. He always told me when he was about
to come, and I would take my mouth off and rub his dick up and down with
my hand. Sometimes I would play with his balls with my other hand but
sometimes I would lick them with my tongue.
One night, he told me he wanted me to try something new.
"Ruthie," he whispered in my ear as he played with my pussy.
"When you suck me tonight, I want you to try to keep it in your mouth
while I come. All you have to do is swallow it and keep sucking. Do you
think you could do that?"
I had imagined many times what it would be like to drink my
Daddy's come. I thought I could, but said, "I'm not sure, Daddy, but
I'll try." So I took his dick in my mouth and began to suck. I had my
hand around the base and was moving my mouth up and down on the top
part. Then I moved my hand down to his balls, tried to relax my throat
like he had taught me to do, and took as much of him into my mouth as I
could. Pretty soon, I could feel it start to jerk in my mouth and I
could tell by the jerks that he was getting close to coming. I was
nervous, but I also wanted to know what it would be like for Daddy to
shoot inside me. This was the time when I always stopped and played with
his dick with my hand while he came. But now he took my head in his
hands and held it down.
Jack, when he started coming in my mouth, I thought I'd choke --
but he started whispering, "Swallow it, honey. Swallow it and keep
sucking." I did, and when he was finished, I was proud of myself. I knew
I had made my Daddy happy and I knew that from now on, I could handle
his come in my mouth. I hadn't really tasted it that much, but had just
swallowed it, and it was no problem. I felt good because I had pleased
him. That's all I thought about: I wanted to make my Daddy feel good.
I could hold back no longer. I grabbed Ruthie's ass and pulled
her towards me strongly, once again emptying my dick into her pussy. She
floated up against me and let me control her body while she paddled with
her arms. I moved her up and down on my swollen dick until it erupted
again and I was shooting my seed deep into the body of my beautiful
water nymph. It was an incredible orgasm and I pulled her head to me and
pressed my mouth against hers, totally out of control in my lust. She
clung to me like a baby, giving and taking and enjoying the strength of
the incredible emotion that we were feeling for each other. Finally, she
backed off, floated away from me. She started giggling and splashed me
with water.
"Let's get out and lie on the sand," she suggested.
Actually, there was no sand because this was a farmer's pond in
a pasture, but we lay down by the bank of the water.
"I love making love in the water, Jack," she said softly. "Maybe
someday I'll tell you why."
I had been drawn into her story to the point where I felt
compelled to ask her the one question I really was interested in knowing
the answer to.
"Ruthie," I said, as I tickled her breasts while we lay in the
short grass by the water. "When did you and your father start to go all
the way?"
She looked at me very seriously and for a moment I thought I
might have trodden on forbidden ground. But then she smiled a smile that
was like a whisper of a memory that would always ride on the edge of her
mind forever. Her answer was in a tone of reverence, and full only of
love...
My thirteenth birthday was on a Saturday. Mom was still working
the four to midnight shift. We had a party, and several of my friends
came. A boy who I think was interested in me came, and we had a great
time. After the party, Mom left for work and Daddy and I cleaned up.
I was washing the dishes when he came up behind me and slipped
his hands under my sweatshirt until they were on my breasts. I felt my
nipples getting hard and he took each of them between his fingers and
played with them.
"Did you have a good time today, honey?" he whispered in my ear,
as he caressed it with his tongue.
"Oh, Daddy, I had a wonderful time!" I turned around and we
kissed each other with our mouths open. His hands were all over me, and
I was soon turned on. I wanted him to suck my nipples right there, but
he backed off.
"Why don't we get in my bed?" he suggested. I was ready, so we
went into his room. You have to understand, Jack, Daddy had been pushing
at my pussy for six months with his dick, I think he was trying to
stretch it so I could take him down there. But that birthday night, when
he began to push against me, I knew something was going to be different.
"Ruthie," he whispered, "today you are no longer a little girl.
Today you became a teenager. Childhood never really ends, honey. There
are memories of childhood in every grownup. But today was a special day
for you, and I want to make tonight a special night for you, too,
sweetheart. You'll always be Daddy's little girl, but tonight I want to
show you what it's like to be a woman."
I wasn't quite sure what he meant, so I just lay there -- but I
knew this night would be different. Very soon, I knew what was
different. He had put his dick up against my hole plenty of times, but
usually it was just teasing or at least gentle probing. When he pushed
his dick against me that night, I knew he was trying to it get inside.
Jack, I can't tell you how I felt. I was scared to death that it
would go in me, but the things that he'd been doing to me for the last
six months had made me think a lot about what it would be like if he
ever put it inside. I was so curious about it that if he wanted to do
it, I wouldn't stop him. That night I knew it was about to happen for
the first time and didn't try to stop it. He had his dick right at my
hole, and he was pushing hard and squirming and moving around. The
pressure hurt and I cried out once -- I didn't mean to, but I couldn't
help it. I wanted to help him but I just didn't know how.
He backed off when I cried out and hugged me to him. My words
came out without my thinking about what I was saying.
"Don't stop, Daddy," I whispered. "I want to be a woman. I want
you to put it in there."
"Oh Ruthie," he answered. "I've wanted to do this for so long,
but I promised myself that I'd wait until you were thirteen." Then he
slipped down between my thighs. "I'm going to kiss you to get you
ready."
I figured I was about as ready as I was going to be. Even though
it hurt, I felt the need to have him in there. But he started licking
me, so I gave in and let it feel good. He pushed his tongue into my
hole, then pulled it out again. He rolled it around and around my button
while he tried to open my hole with his fingers. With his other hand, he
played with my back hole. Then he put both his hands under my ass and
lifted me off the bed, pushing his mouth against me and sucking my
button. I went off like a fire cracker, jerking in spasms that I had no
control over. I was as hot as an oven and I needed him to fill me up. I
lost control and started screaming, "Come on, Daddy, fuck me! Please,
Daddy; please fuck me!"
He had never heard that word from me and probably didn't know
that I knew it, but I think that when I said, "Fuck me, Daddy," he lost
control, too. He got up and took a jar of vaseline from the side of the
bed. He spread some on his dick until it glistened, then he got back on
top of me and took his dick in his hand. He led it to my hole, and began
to push.
"Push back, honey," he moaned. "If you want Daddy to fuck you,
push back."
Jack, I was as turned on as I'd ever been, but still it hurt. I
pushed as much as I could, and tried to spread my legs wider so he could
get his dick in. I spread them so far apart that I thought I'd split
open, but it still didn't go in. Daddy was breathing really hard, and I
think I started to cry, but I was determined not to quit now. I was
going to be a woman if it killed me.
He put his hands under my hips and jerked me hard up against his
body. His dick rammed against my hole with all the force that we could
manage. Then, I was screaming and crying as the pain went up through my
lower stomach, pulsing and throbbing, and Daddy was moaning and gasping.
He was inside me. My Daddy had his dick inside my pussy, only my pussy
was on fire. It was a sharp pain, Jack, and it was really bad. I didn't
think I could stand it. I felt like he must have had his whole cock
inside me, but to my amazement, he started sliding it further in. I knew
then that I couldn't hold it all. I just wasn't big enough yet.
"Wait, Daddy!" I cried between gulps of air. "Please don't put
it in any more; it hurts." I was crying, and he was sweating and
puffing. Then I heard him take a deep breath, and I think he was trying
to get control of himself, because he stopped pushing and started
kissing me and playing with my hair.
"My brave little girl, my darling princess." Jack, he hadn't
called me his princess in years, but it was my childhood name. The
memories of it made me remember how much I loved my Daddy, and I tried
to stop crying.
"Daddy," I gasped. "Just give me a minute to get used to it. It
just feels like it's too big to go in me."
"Do you want me to take it out?" he whispered. I knew that was
the last thing he wanted, but to tell you the truth, I did; the pain was
still killing me. But I just couldn't ask him to do it after he had
called me his princess again. I liked being my Daddy's princess.
"No," I answered. "Just let me get used to it." And really,
after a while, the sharp pain stopped, and was replaced by what I'd call
just a bad soreness. But it still felt like I had a telephone pole stuck
up me. He didn't try to put it any further in, he just was kissing me
and tickling my breasts, playing with my hair, and running his hands
around my ass. Tickling my breasts turned me on again, in spite of the
pain. He started sucking my nipples and rubbing his tongue over them,
and I almost forgot the pain in my pussy because he was making my
breasts feel so good.
Finally, he put his hand down on my button and began to play
with it. He was so gentle and so loving that gradually, the pain didn't
matter so much anymore. Now my emotions were in real conflict. My pussy
still hurt, but I felt for the first time that my pussy was doing what
it was meant for: holding my Daddy's dick inside me. I began to feel the
needs of a woman, and I wanted to have my Daddy's dick inside me. It
began to build inside me, and I began to move my hips against him. It
still hurt, but now I wanted more. I knew now what he meant about making
me a woman.
I whispered into his ear, "Fuck me now, Daddy. Please Daddy,
fuck your little princess." He put his hands on my ass and pulled me up
to him so that it started to go deeper again. This time, the pleasure
overcame the pain, and I wanted it. Oh, Jack, I really wanted it!
"Fuck me, Daddy," I said out loud, then, louder: "Come on, do it
to me! I need it! Push it all the way in! Fuck me, Daddy, fuck your
little girl!"
He was all the way inside now; I could tell because I could feel
our bodies touching. It hurt like hell, but I now knew that I could do
it, and I knew that I had never wanted anything in my life as much as I
wanted my Daddy to make his dick come inside me. He had explained to me
a long time ago that I couldn't make a baby by sucking his juice, but I
knew I could make one if he shot his juice in my pussy. If we hadn't
been fucking, I would have cared; at that moment, I didn't.
He started thrusting in and out. He was trying to go slowly so
he wouldn't hurt me, but he did hurt me. Still, Jack, there's a time
when the pleasure makes the pain disappear and I was so turned on that I
had reached that point. I was pushing back, trying to get my Daddy's
dick as deep inside me as I could. I couldn't believe that he could get
it all the way in, but he did, and I wanted it. It didn't feel like when
he sucked me -- it was different -- but I liked the feeling. I needed
his dick inside me now.
Pretty soon I could tell that Daddy was getting ready, because
he started pushing in and out faster and faster. He was breathing hard
now, gasping for breath, and I was, too. I kept trying to spread my legs
further and further apart, and pushed up at him, it was almost reflexive
now, because I wanted it, but he was still doing most of the work. Then,
suddenly, I felt it getting bigger and jerking, and he rammed it all the
way up inside me. I didn't know until then that he hadn't really put it
all the way in. The pain returned, but Daddy was crying and moaning and
I knew he was coming inside me. I couldn't feel the juice, but I knew it
was shooting out because he just held his dick all the way in and
stopped moving, and I could feel it jerking by itself inside my hole.
Finally, he started to calm down and I knew it was over. I didn't come
that first time, but I was filled with love for my Daddy and as he
settled down against me, I hugged him and kissed his cheek. To my
surprise, his cheek was wet. He was crying.
"What's the matter, Daddy?" I whispered.
"Are you okay, princess?"
"Daddy, I'm fine -- I really am. I liked it; I really did."
Slowly, he slipped out of me and we cuddled for a long time.
After a while, I realized that Daddy had gone to sleep in my arms. I
thought about slipping out and going to my bed, but instead, I stayed in
his arms for a long time, thinking about being my Daddy's princess and
the things that we had done. I felt like a woman in those moments, and
wanted to fall asleep in Daddy's arms. But I knew that mother would be
home before long, and finally slipped away to my room. He didn't wake.
Ruthie's story of losing her virginity to her father on her
thirteenth birthday had my emotions churning. I had never thought much
about child abuse, except when I read about it in the paper. Almost
every day there are stories of grown men raping girls Ruthie's age, and
even younger. I had always read them with a certain amount of emotional
detachment; I felt sorry for these children who were abused, but I
really couldn't relate to it on a personal level. Now a whole new world
had been opened to me. Here was an adult woman, willingly telling me
that the same thing had happened to her. She had actively participated
in it and had liked it. It made me wonder about Ruthie's psychological
make-up. More than that, it made me wonder about how much child abuse
goes on unreported because the child doesn't consider it to be child
abuse. Obviously, Ruthie didn't.
I won't pretend the ability to project my mind into the thoughts
of a young girl involved in a sexual relationship. I can only tell you
that Ruthie spoke of her father without resentment or regret, only with
love. I can also tell you that I was now fairly sure that I was in love
with a very mixed up young woman.
Given Ruthie's pattern, I didn't' expect to hear from her again
for a few days at least, and looked forward dejectedly to trying to gain
satisfaction from one of the other girls I was dating. For once, I was
wrong. About ten minutes after I got home from work the next day, the
phone rang.
When I picked it up, Ruthie was on the other end.
"Jack, hi. I'm at County Hospital. Please come down here -- I
need you. Please, Jack!" She was crying and running her words together.
I waited until she finished and said, "Ruthie, what happened?"
"My Daddy, Jack. He was in a wreck. Some drunk kid hit his car,
and he was in a wreck. Oh God, Jack, please come down here. I need you.
Please come right now!" She was obviously hysterical, A small detached
part of me felt like I was making a guest appearance in one of the
afternoon soap operas, but I was far too emotionally attached to Ruthie
by now to do anything but go to her. She really sounded like she needed
my help.
"Ruthie, I can be there in ten minutes. Is he hurt bad?"
"I don't know. Nobody will tell me anything. Please, Jack, if
you care anything about me, come to me now."
I did, and I did. I found her sitting in the second floor lobby.
When she saw me, she ran to me and molded herself to me. It was a great
kiss, worth the trip.
"Oh, Jack," she finally said. "I'm so glad you came."
"How's he doing?" I asked, still trying to regain my composure
from the intensity of her kiss.
"They finally came out and told me. It's not as bad as they
thought. His neck is sprained, and his head was cut really bad, but
that's the worst. The bad thing was that he lost a lot of blood because
the damned ambulance took so long getting to him. Would you believe
there was another wreck and they couldn't get through? Isn't that just
ridiculous, he could have bled to death. Anyway, they say he'll be here
four or five days, then he can come home."
I hate to sound selfish, but five days of Ruthie without her
father's presence sounded mighty good to me. I didn't hate the old man,
but I surely hadn't formed any attachment to him. He was my competitor
for Ruthie.
"I feel better now," she confided. "I thought he was going to
die, Jack. I really kept thinking he was going to leave me and die. If
he had died, I would have died, too."
That one scared me, but I made no comment, and let her go on.
"He's asleep now, Jack. I want to tell him goodnight, then I
guess we can go." So we went down the hall and walked into the room.
The man who lay in the bed made an immediate impression upon me.
He was large, and looked virile despite the tubes in his arms. Somehow,
he reminded me of a sleeping lion. I thought I would feel revulsion, but
what I really felt was a combination of envy and fear. Even in a
hospital bed, this was a man to be reckoned with. I wanted Ruthie for my
own, but how could I compete with this man and the bond that had been
forged between them in all their years together?
Her goodbye was emotional, a combination of "I love you Daddy,"
kisses, and touching his body. He didn't stir. Whatever they had him on,
he was really under; a normal man would have had to be almost dead not
to respond to the way she was touching and kissing him. Finally she let
go of his hand and turned to me. "Let's go to my place," she said, and I
nodded.
Ruthie's mother had left home when she discovered her husband's
relationship with her daughter (but that's later in the story), and no-
one knew where she was. We had the house to ourselves.
It was a huge two-story frame house with porches all around. The
front porch on the second story was sagging. I'd followed Ruthie in my
car, and as we entered the house, I felt her father's presence like a
spirit, hovering around us.
Amazingly, Ruthie was fairly upbeat when we got home. I think
the doctors had reassured her, and she was satisfied that her father
would be back soon. She gave me a tour of the place -- almost a mansion,
though a shabby one -- and we finally ended up in a bedroom on the
second floor. Suddenly, she became very somber.
"This is our bed, Jack. This is the bed where we make love. He
slept here with my mother, but it's where he makes love to me." Then:
"Wherever I make love to you, Jack, it cannot be here. This bed is for
Daddy and me." The unspoken resentment she felt for her mother was
apparent, but I took it as a challenge. I resolved that one day Ruthie
would come to me when I was in that bed.
Still, she sounded so serious, so fanatical, that I decided
there was no point in discussing anything about that right now. Though I
accepted it (and it sometimes even turned me on), Ruthie's behavior with
her father was still an unnatural obsession. My problem, as I said
before, was that my obsession with Ruthie deepened each time I was with
her. I knew that I'd soon be unable to keep Ruthie from learning that I
wanted her for myself. But this wasn't the time, and we stood in that
room where so much had happened, thinking our own thoughts.
Finally, after several moments, she took my hand and said
sweetly, "Let's go downstairs and have a drink."
Ruthie can always tell what a man wants. I don't know how. She
didn't bring a drink; she brought a bottle, an ice bucket and two
glasses. She also brought a pitcher of water, but that night I chose to
take my bourbon straight.
I already knew there would be no sex that night for me, but I
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