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From: The Sysadmin <root@wingadingairplane.com>
Subject: I get an evening of hot sex with a beautiful woman, courtesy of Bill Gates
Date: Sun, 16 Oct 2005 01:07:50 -0700
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===================
I get an evening of hot sex with a beautiful woman, courtesy of Bill Gates
A couple of weeks went by since I got laid M______ _____, the
marketing 'droid. Interestingly enough, this chapter of the story begins around 9:30 in the morning. I was in my cubical, analyzing some system logs when M_____ showed up, in person. She looked gorgeous, as always. A nice skirt, with no creases, trim shirt, expensive watch on her left hand and a gold bracelet on her right, perfect hair.
"Why M____", I exclaimed, "How nice to see you! What brings you down to the basement?"
"I am invited to a marketing presentation tomorrow night by some Microsoft people, and it seemed a good idea to bring a technician along so we can understand some of the implications of what they're proposing. We have some of our executives flying in from out of town and it would give you some visibility", she explained. "Plus, I wanted to see your environment. Is it always this stark and noisy?"
"Yes, why do you ask?"
"Never mind, will you accept?"
"I think so, where and when?"
"Be in my office at 6:30 tomorrow, and dress up, please, because it will be in a nice hotel downtown. We will get there by Taxi"
"Okay". I could take a shower in the fitness room, and believe it or not, I do have a suit and tie for job interviews, weddings, funerals, divorces and other courtroom appearances, that sort of thing.
The next day, we took delivery of 60 computers, and they had to loaded (thank god for PXE), racked, networked, and tested. That's a lot of lifting, in a hot computer room, and I was sweating... and watching the clock carefully. Around 3:50, M_____ showed up outside the computer room door, knocking loudly. She dressed in a severe business suit, jacket, skirt below the knees, nylons, this time.
"I've been trying to find you", she panted, "the meeting has been moved up to 4:00 because the executives from out of town want to leave early. Let's go, now!".
She grabbed my wrist, pulled me out of the computer room, and rushed for the elevator. "Can I shower and change?", I pleaded. "No time for that now, c'mon". We dove into the elevator. "You're all sweaty", she informed me. So I explained to her how I'd been manhandling 60 computers, each weighing about 50 pounds. Hmmm, 1-1/2 tons of computers. I *had* been working hard. We got to the lobby, raced out the door and dove into the last taxi. Just barely in time. And I was face to face with M_____'s director! I'm hoping that the blowjob and the fucking I had gotten from M_____ to fix her computer, twice, was not going to be a topic of discussion. Instead, he gushed over me, what I nice guy I was and technically competent, too.
We arrived at the hotel, and walked into the meeting room. Everybody else was wearing a suit and tie or equivalent feminine attire, except for me in my sweats and my "In a world without fences, who needs gates?" T-shirt. I tried to make myself as inconspicuous as possible but M____ and her director insisted I have a seat at the inner table, between the two of them.
The Microsoft people got up and talked about their new operating system and new applications. Yadda, Yadda, Yadda. So then they asked their questions. Most of the people asked easy questions. M____ nudged me in the side and whispered "Ask a tough question!" So I asked about the reliability of the OS. They said their new OS would be very reliable. I asked if it had a registry. Yes, it has a registry. Can applications write to the registry? Yes, applications can write to the registry. Can a misconfiguration of the registry cause the computer to become unbootable? Yes, it can, but no application would do that. A malicious application would. Is your API compatible with previous APIs. Yes, it is. So if there is a fundemental problem with the API in a previous version of Windows, that will be manifested in the new operating system. Well, no, because we've fixed them all. Then you've broken compatibility. Well, err, uh, we're mostly compatible.
And so on. You could tell that the Microsofties were losing the battle.
"Who are you, anyway?" one of them asked me.
"I'm a sysadmin, of course". I told them.
Well, they kicked me out of there, so I sat down in the lobby and waited for the meeting to break up. I not only missed the rest of the presentation (which I am told didn't go very well), but I also missed the catered dinner.
M_____ came out and sat down next to me. "I'm sorry", she said. "I didn't understand a word of what you said, and probably nobody else did either, but everybody got the message that you were trying to send".
"That's okay", I reassured her.
"Look, I'd like to make amends", she said.
"Oh really? What do you have in mind?"
"Follow me, please", she smiled.
She led me out of the lobby and into an elevator, and we rode up to the 17th floor. We then walked down the hall and stopped at room 1723. She withdrew a card key from her purse and opened door. She walked in. "Follow me, please", she said. So I followed her. A fly in a spider's web.
"When the executives changed the meeting time, it was because they wanted to go home on a red-eye flight tonight. They told me to cancel the rooms - but it was too late and the hotel wouldn't do it. So I decided to use the nicest room for myself", she said.
"Really?"
"Yes, now go hit the shower, you smell awful"
So I walked into the bathroom (it was bigger than my cubical), stripped, turned on the water and got in. The hotel supplied soap and scented shampoo. I scrupped myself as best I could. And then the door to the shower opened, and in stepped M______.
To say I was stunned was an understatement. I had essentially blackmailed her, or perhaps prostituted her, into giving me a blowjob and also a wonderful fucking. In the nude, in the light, she was stunningly beautiful. She turned me around and scrubbed my back and my ass. Then I turned around and did her back paying careful attention to her ass. We turned off the shower and stepped out, dried off.
"Don't say a word", she whispered.
She led me to the bad, pulled back the covers and pushed me in. Then she climbed in the other side. She laid her head on my chest and started fondling my cock. Within moments, it was a rod of steel. She reached under her pillow and pulled out a condom, opened the package, and carefully wrapped it around my dick, gently messaging it. Then she rolled over on her back, and said "Fuck me".
So I did. We did the missionary position first, and she came 5 or 6 times and then I had my orgasm. She squeezed my cock with her powerful vaginal muscles, then held the condom carefully and slid it off. I rolled off of her, watching her. She reached under her pillow and pulled out a baggie, and dropped the condom in the baggie. Then, she messaged my cock some more, and it was soon erect again. She reached under the pillow and pulled out... another condom.
"Lay on your back", she said.
So I did. She put the condom on, then knelt on top of me and slid me into her. She started moving up and down on my cock, stopping occaisionally for an orgasm. Despite the air conditioning, she was sweating profusely, and for the first time in my experience, her hair was unkempt. She eventually collapsed on top of me. So I stroked her hair, and her back. I kissed her ear and the corner of her jaw. She sat up a little and looked at me, and smiled. I traced the line of her jaw, stroked her nose, fondled her ear. She rose up and again and began rocking again. She leaned back. I held her shoulders to keep her from falling backwards. She came again. And again. And then I shot my load into the condom.
She pulled my cock out of her, deftly removed the condom and tucked it into the baggie. Then she pulled a kleenex from a dispenser next to the bed, and wiped my cock carefully. Then she laid her head on my chest, pulled the covers over both of us, and went to sleep. I decided that sleep was the better part of valor....
At 2:15, my pager went beep, and told me that one of my servers had gone down. She had one leg on top of me, head on my chest, soft breathing. What to do?
Fortunately, she woke up. "Baby", she mumbled, "What is it?"
"Duty calls, my dear"
"Didn't you say that you had reliable servers?"
"Yes, I did, but we have several thousand servers, and the laws of probability say that one will go down every once in a while"
"Didn't you say that you have redundant servers?"
"We do"
"Then stay". She wrapped her hand around my cock and began fondling it. To hell with the pager, I thought. Soon my dick was erect, and she went down on me. Her perfectly manicured hands stroked my dick while her mouth and talented tongue completed a marvelous experience. Within a few moments, I shot a load into her mouth. She swallowed every drop, then put her head on my chest and went to sleep.
Around 6:30 AM, I became aware of something warm and wet around my dick. I tried to push the sleep out of my eyes, and eventually realized that I was getting another terrific blow job. She looked at me.
"Oh, you're awake", she observed. Then she reached under her pillow and pulled out another condom.
"How many of those things do you have?", I asked her.
"Last one", she said.
She put the condom on my cock, and then slid down the bed to end. "Take me", she ordered. So I got up, walked around the end of the bed, and stabbed her cunt with my cock. The bed was high enough so I didn't have to bend at the knees too much. This fucking was intense, savage. She grabbed her ankles and pulled her legs back and apart. She came a number of times, again trying to keep quiet and almost succeeding.
"Pick me up", she ordered.
So I bent over. She put her arms around my neck. Then I straightened up. She wrapped her legs around my hips, I put my hands under her ass. Then she moved up and down on my cock. She buried her face in my neck and kissed me. I was in heaven and so was she. Eventually, I came in the condom. I gradually put her down. She then knelt in front of me, removed the condom and tucked it in the baggie.
"I'm going to take a shower, then I am going to dress, go home, and then go to work", she announced.
"I'm going to get some breakfast and then go to work"
"Wear the same clothes you wore yesterday", she sounded incredulous.
"Sure, I'm a sysadmin, nobody cares what I wear so long as I'm there when they need me. Tell mem, why last night and this morning?"
"All of the men I've dated have been shallow and artificial. You're real. You know what you believe in, and you've got the passion to follow through on it. You don't make things up. You're trust worthy. You're loyal. And you are terrific in bed".
"Oh. You're not sore at me for the first two times?"
"I was the first time. But I haven't had a satisfying date in months. All of the men I have been seeing lie to me. You're honest and direct. I like that"
"Do you generally date marketing people?"
"Yes, as a matter of fact, I do", she said, clearly thinking.
So I got close to her, embraced her, and kissed her.
Then I got dressed in my sweats, left her, and walked to work, to diagnose the dead server.
We've been an item for a year now, and I never would have met her, or even gotten the time of day from her, had it not been for the pile of crap that is MS-Windows.