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From: Anthony Taylor <anthonytaylor121@hotmail.com>
Subject: ST: Determined To Succeed chapter 3   mm / con
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===================

Determination to succeed!
By Anthony Taylor
Edited by Drew Hunt


Authors Notes:-

This story contains Sex between men.  If you are under 18 in the Uk (or 
appropriate legal age in your country) please stop reading here. If such 
mentioned material may offend you please stop reading too.  This story is 
fiction and any resemblance to reality is pure coincidence.
Though this story may involve unsafe sex (It is only fiction), and I believe 
in playing safe (look after yourself and your partner).
Hope you enjoy my story, and of course please email me with your comments 
good or bad.  It is always nice for us writers to know other's are reading 
our stories, and know what readers think of the stories as they develop.
gaystories@anthonys-digital-world.co.uk

Enjoy!!



CHAPTER FOUR -

I was in the hospital for two days as they observed my mental state. In that 
time I looked at my life, and realised that I didn't want to die, I had 
ambitions to fulfil and no one would stop me.  I was discharged and went to 
Blackpool with my mother.  The small flat that we moved into was really 
dirty and damp. I hated it but until I worked out my plan for my future I 
had no option but to make do.  Mum seemed to be staying off the booze, dad 
was out of our way, so life was a little easier but I still had the empty 
ache that only Steve could fill.

Life in Blackpool wasn't quite as bad as I'd expected.  I missed Steve like 
crazy, he always knew what to say to me if I was upset or stressed. Now I 
had no one in which to confide.  I tried to phone and write to him, but his 
phone was disconnected and I never received any replies to my letters.  It 
seemed obvious to me that dad had won that battle.

About two months after we moved to Blackpool, mum came into the flat in an 
hysterical state.

"Shit Mum what's happened?" I asked in shock.

"I've been bloody attacked and raped!" she screamed.

"Who the fuck was it?" I asked.   Of course that was a stupid question, but 
I was in shock and I was also in a vengeful frame of mind too.

"How the hell should I know, I didn't have time to ask the fucking bastard 
his name did I?"

"Sorry mum, I can't think straight." I pleaded for forgiveness for my 
stupidity  "You have to go to the police Mum."

"I can't go through all that Ben, not again."  This surprised me I didn't 
know that mum had been raped before, but I didn't dare ask her about it. 
She went straight to the shower and must have been in there for at least 
half an hour.  When she came back into the living room I made her a cup of 
tea, and sat and comforted her until she went to her room.

The next day she acted as though nothing had happened the night before.  It 
was from that moment on that mum hit the bottle again, but it wasn't the 
only noticeable difference to her.  She also lost interest in life, letting 
herself go.

Over the course of the next year she gradually got worse, she  lost her job 
at the bingo hall, she was drinking heavily and bringing back different men 
every time she went out on the town.  I finished school and that's when the 
next chapter of my life really started.

After leaving school I got a job in a café at the back of an amusement 
arcade.  It was one of those greasy Sausage and Chip's café's that you tend 
to find in such places.

"Right Ben, this is my son Jason, he'll show you the ropes."  Bill the owner 
of the Café said as he left me with his son.  Jason wasn't the handsomest 
guy that I had seen, but he had a charisma, a way to him that intrigued me 
and I just had to get to know him.  Jason was softly spoken and 
exceptionally kind to everyone even if it was a customer complaining about 
the meal she had ordered.  Nothing fazed him.  We seemed to get on quite 
well and made a good team.  Halfway through my first day we were even 
cracking jokes.  We closed at 10pm and had another hour of cleaning up the 
place before we could leave.  The work was hard 12-hour shifts but I had 
enjoyed my first day.  Finally I had found someone I could relate to and get 
along with.  On the way home I reviewed the events of my first day of my 
working life.  I couldn't help but think of Jason.  I started getting turned 
on as I thought about his personality and he had a nice butt too.

Mum was in her room and obviously shagging as she always did on a weekend 
night.  I could hear the usual noises coming from her room.  I put the TV on 
and turned up the volume to try and drown out the noise.  I must have fallen 
asleep, because the next thing I knew was my watch alarm  going off.  It was 
eight in the morning and I was still bleary eyed as I made my way to the 
bathroom.  I was surprised to find it locked.  Mother never got up till 
midday usually, and her weekly shags were always long gone by the time I 
woke up.

I didn't think much of it, I went to the kitchen and made some toast for my 
breakfast with a glass of fresh orange juice.   I sat and read the local 
free paper.  There it was, an advert for Flamingo's - a gay nightclub.  Wow 
I thought to myself.  I jotted down the address and promised myself on my 
next night off I would go and check it out.  That was of course if I could 
pass the bouncers for 21, I usually managed to get in straight clubs and 
pass as 18.

I heard someone leave the bathroom and shut the front door a few minutes 
later, 'Obviously her shag' I thought to myself.  I went to the bathroom and 
took a shower.  Then when I got out and dried my body I noticed a wallet 
sitting on top of the toilet system.  I couldn't help myself, I had to look 
at the wallets contents, that is when my world started crashing down once 
again around me.  The wallet had my dad's driving licence inside.  I rushed 
to get dressed and then I packed as much of my clothing as I could, along 
with a few personal belongings too.  I couldn't stay there; I just couldn't 
see him again.  I wrote a note and left it on the kitchen unit.  I left for 
work.

"Hey Ben what's with the two bags~" Jason asked me.

"I've left home.  My mother is shagging my Dad again and I can't cope with 
him being around me." I replied.

Jason knew bits of my past; but he didn't know the real reason why my life 
had been so shit.  I just didn't want to risk rejection or abuse from him 
for my sexuality.  I hadn't worked out his or his dad's view on gays yet.  I 
was still feeling my way.  Though I couldn't help thinking about how I would 
like to feel Jason's arse.

"Where are you going to go then Ben?"

"Guess I'll have to go to a bed and breakfast for now."

"Why don't you stay with Dad and me for a few weeks until you get something 
sorted out~"  Jason offered.

This was reaffirmed by his father shouting "Yeah good idea son."

"Only for a couple of weeks then.  After that I need my own space to sort my 
head out properly."  I Thanked them both for their kindness.

It was a fairly quiet day at the café.  Bill let me and Jason or Jase as he 
preferred to be called, off  work early.  We went to their house at the 
other end of the town.  We each carried one of my bags.  When we finally 
arrived at their semi detached house Jase took me on a tour.  He finally 
showed me his room, which I would be sharing with him.  He cleared a space 
in his wardrobe and told me to make myself at home.

"Use what ever you want in there, the only thing that is off bounds is the 
cabinet next to my bed." he shouted as he made his way downstairs.

"Thanks Jase." I replied as I put my things away and made up the other bed. 
Then I looked around his room trying to get a feel of what Jase was really 
like as a person.  Looking back now I suppose I was feeling the ground, 
trying to gauge how far I could open up to him.  I changed into shorts and 
tee shirt before Joining Jase downstairs.

"Ooow what lovely legs we have there Benny Boy."  Jase mocked using 
outrageously camp mannerisms and voice. I wondered if he'd guessed my 
sexuality.  But I ruled it out, I was fairly straight acting what ever that 
means.

"Why are you like interested Jase?" I joked back half meaning it.

"That's for me to know and you to find out.  Mind you I do sleep walk you 
know.  So you never know what might happen in the middle of the night."

"Ooo I will look forward to it then."  I replied meaning it even though I 
said it jokingly.  I knew I had to change the subject quickly before I said 
anything that I might regret and also before my cock got hard as I could 
already feel it murmuring.

"Well Jase are you going to show me the town tonight?"

"Sure Ben, but to be honest I don't get many free nights, so I am probably 
not that much wiser than you as far as the in bars and clubs in the town are 
concerned."

As the evening came upon us, we both showered and fooled around spraying 
water around, and then we started wrestling, trying to pull each other's 
boxers off.  I managed to rip Jase's Boxers off him revealing his nicely 
shaped cock; I had to stop myself from licking my lips.  I was mesmerised by 
the thickness of Jase's cock.  It was not the that long at 6 1/2 inches, but 
it was sure as hell not the thinnest, it was thick, and I mean really thick, 
I wouldn't go as far as saying it was as thick as a cola can, but it was as 
close as it could be to the size of a deodorant can.  His cock was uncut and 
had a nice bush of hair around the base of his shaft and his balls were 
covered too.

]"Hey Ben do you like what you see?"  Jase asked breaking my dreamy state.

I went really red as I felt my face blush.  He had caught me looking, then 
again how could he miss it.  "Wow Jase I've never seen a cock that thick 
before."  Was all I could think of to say in my embarrassment.

"Yep you don't get many of these to the pound."   He Winked at me and gave 
me a cheeky smile.

" I bet you have every girl in town after you?"  I joked.

"Well yes I suppose I do but so do all the boys."  He said winking once 
more. "Come on Ben, let's finish getting ready and get out of here." He said 
breaking the conversation and my train of thought.

Ten minutes later we were walking along the prom towards the north pier.

"All the best places for us are at this end of town."  Jase said with that 
same cheesy grin on his face.   I got the impression that Jase liked the 
idea of winding me up and teasing me.  Suddenly there seemed to be a lot of 
men around ,and not so many women.  There were a few outrageously camp men 
too.

"Here we are, Basils."  Jase said as we entered and walked to the bar.

"Hi Jase Darling, are you doing anything later?"  The barman asked him.

"Yep I'm showing Ben here the highlights of the nightlife"

"Shame."  Sighed the barman.

"Oh fuck, Jase you could have told me you were gay!" I said as I clicked 
what he was up to.

"Well are you or aren't you?"  He asked me as the barman passed over our 
drinks.

"Yep I am Gay."  I said.

"Thought so, my gaydar hasn't failed me yet."  He smirked.

"So why didn't you just tell me back at your place?"  I asked.

"Why didn't you tell me then either?"  He laughed.  "Ben I fancy the pants 
off you, I have to restrain myself from touching your sexy arse at work."

I didn't reply, I just stuck my lips on him, we embraced each other as we 
kissed passionately for a good few minutes.

"Wow Jase, I feel the same way about you, the fantasies I have been having 
you wouldn't believe!"

"Well you will have to tell me some of them sometime Benny Babes."   He gave 
me that cheeky grin of his again, accompanied by another wink.   I was on a 
high at that moment.   all my family troubles seemed to have disappeared 
into the distant past.  I was happier that night than I had been for years. 
I was with someone who I wanted to be with, and who wanted to be with me 
too.  I could be myself, I didn't have to pretend to be straight.  I felt so 
free.

After we had finished our drinks, Jase led me to the next bar, Pepe's, which 
was in the basement of a building, it was small but friendly.  He obviously 
was well known judging by how many guys stopped to say hello to him.  I felt 
a bit uneasy at all the attention he was attracting. I hoped he wasn't just 
after a shag from me.  After a couple of drinks in Pepes ,  we walked 
towards the Flying Handbag.  I plucked up the courage to ask him what he 
wanted to happen between us.

"Well my Benny babes, I want to wine and dine and sixty nine you."  He 
Joked.  "No seriously Ben I want us to be lovers, I'm not into shagging 
around, I've only had two previous relationships, both only lasted about six 
months due to me working long hours at the café.  That's why we would work 
well together, not only is there an attraction and chemistry between us, but 
we both work the same hours too."

"Yeah that's all cool, but what about your dad, does he know your gay?"  I 
had to ask him.

"Yeah dad's cool, he is one of these new world men, he has even joined me 
once or twice on a night out, but the bastard got more men after him than I 
did!" Jase said as we both burst into a real stomach laughing fit.

"So does this mean we are an item then Jase?"

"Yup if you're happy to work with your lover?" he winked.

"Bloody sure I am if he is as sexy as you, how could I refuse."

It was soon time to enter the Nightclub, I was having the time of my life, 
my first time on the gay scene and my first boyfriend, I kept pinching 
myself.  We paid our entrance fee and walked through the adjoining doors to 
the club from the Flying Handbag.

"Bloody hell this place is big!" I remarked.

"Sure is Benny Babes, and full of hunky men.  Just a shame they are off 
limits now."  He teased.

"I can look though."  I said and we both laughed.

"Come here!"  He said as he pulled me into his arms, we started kissing 
passionately.  He certainly knew how to use his mouth, he left my lips and 
tongue tingling.  I was so light headed due to the mixture of excitement and 
alcohol.  He pulled me onto the dance floor and we danced and danced to the 
cheesy pop music, then suddenly at the stroke of midnight the music came to 
an abrupt end, there was silence and everyone was still.

'Shit this is all a dream.'  I thought to myself, thinking that I was about 
to wake up.  Then suddenly all the speakers in the club boomed out the 
latest dance music at full volume.  The abrupt silence before they changed 
the type of music was so atmospheric.

We continued to dance our socks off until around 1 am. Then I started 
feeling really hungry, so we went up to the café on the second of the four 
floors of the club.  We both tucked our teeth into burger and chips. After 
we had finished eating I wiped a spot of ketchup from Jase's mouth.

Jase then led me into a sex shop inside the club.  I had never seen anything 
like it, all those naked men in magazines and videos.  He picked up some 
Lube and condoms, and winked at me.  I felt so embarrassed as we went to pay 
for them. Jase noticed my unease and pinched my bum as he handed over the 
money to the guy behind the counter.

I can't really remember what happened for the rest of the night, until we 
got back home.  Once at home,  Jase made me a hot drink making me drink it 
all up, then he said we'd better get to bed.  We went to the bedroom and I 
was about to get into my own bed when Jase said "Oh no Babes, this is our 
bed now."

"What will your dad say?"  I asked.

"Nothing Dave my last boyfriend used to sleep with me sometimes.  I told you 
dad is cool about everything."  Jase reassured me.

I started to cry uncontrollably.

"Hey Ben, what's up?" he asked as I got into his bed.

"Oh it's a long story."  I managed to spit out between my sobs.

"Well babes I'm here now, and we will share our problems."  He soothed.

"Thanks Jase I'll tell you in the morning when I'm sober."  I replied as he 
laid me down on my side and cuddled up behind me.  I felt so safe and loved, 
the hair of his body against mine and the stroking of my forehead with his 
hand helped calm me down and I soon drifted off to sleep.



TO be continued
Check out my other stories at http://anthonys-digital-world.co.uk


Please email me your comments on this story at
gaystories@anthonys-digital-world.co.uk 

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