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From: Frank McCoy <mccoyf@millcomm.com>
Newsgroups: alt.sex.stories.d
Subject: Re: {ASSD} Triples.
Date: Thu, 16 Mar 2006 00:18:45 -0600
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In alt.sex.stories.d A Strange Geek <astraYOURngegeek@comMINDcast.net> wrote:
>Frank McCoy wrote:
>> Lately in my stories I find myself getting into triples on just about
>> everything.
>>
>> I've always been fond of adding excess adjectives and adverbs to spice a story
>> up; being careful to use as many variations of them and different nouns for the
>> same thing that I could.
>>
>> But lately I find myself doing triples on just about everything.
>> What's a triple? It's like:
>> A, B, or C.
>> X, Y, and Z.
>>
>> Like, for example, in the current "Story from Hell that won't die!" I just
>> expanded the line:
>> "They will share the greatest joy possible between two people."
>> which is nice, clear, and concise. (There: I did it HERE!) to:
>> "They will share the greatest joy possible between two people of *any* age,
>> gender, or relationship."
>> The idea being to emphasize the uniqueness and depth of the joy so-shared.
>>
>> Instead of "Hot cum" I have the guy ejaculate "Hot, wet, and sticky cum".
>> Just about any place I can put a single expressive adjective I place three
>> expressive, pungent, and pointed adjectives. ;-}
>>
>> Does anybody else have this problem with their adjectives and adverbs getting
>> out of hand? I'm going to have to get rid of that Thesaurus that Kenny talked
>> me into getting. :-}
>
>Like anything, you can sometimes have too much of a good thing. I guess
>the thing to do is to ask yourself which ones are really needed to
>highlight the point of the sentence or paragraph. Sometimes if you're
>describing action that is meant to be fast and hard-hitting, the excess
>verbage can get in the way.
>
>Also be careful using multiple words if they are very similar, in which
>case it can look redundant.
>
That, I do .. watch out for, that is.
I also try to avoid using words with the same root too close to each other.
Some words though, don't have enough synonyms.
You can cycle through, girl, teenager, youngster, young woman, child, and such;
but after a few sentences you either repeat or fall into the trap of "she" and
"her" which are worse yet. Using the person's actual name adds one more word to
the cycle, but ....
Same thing with words like prick, penis, schlong, cock, dick and such.
>Anyway, that's what works for me. I often write a first draft with
>excess descriptives and pare it down during edit to what's really needed
>to tell the story and to keep the sex scenes hot. Excess verbage is a
>hard call to make in the latter case. Too much can drag down the scene;
>too little can cause it to fall flat.
>
>>
>> So far no women have showed up at the door naked, horny, and with beer.
>
>Could be worse. Could have had women showing up naked, beery, and with
>horns.
Hmm ... Jehovah's Witnesses?
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