Perverts 'R' Us

Adventures in Reporting 1 - Blown Away

By PlumpLover ( M/F, oral, anal, ws )

I hope you enjoy this. If you get off while reading this, please let me know! If anyone has questions you can e-mail me at plumplvr <at> gmail.com. I welcome all correspondence.

Part 1

Before my present job, I was a Navy SEAL. With a name like Hunter, I guess it was a foregone conclusion I'd do something like it. Best fuckin' job in the world, and I say that despite getting dinged up, shot, and even hit by a grenade during my years of service.

I was on duty in Afghanistan when some rag-head asshole tossed a grenade in our direction. My buds waxed his sorry ass, but the grenade went off near me. I wasn't hurt all that bad, except for one piece that got me in the left ear - damaged my hearing just enough to disqualify me for SEAL service. I argued, told them I could still hear just fine out the other ear, but the board said sorry and offered me a desk job.

Desk job? Fuck you, which is what I told the Navy. I'm an adrenalin junkie. I didn't join the service to sit behind a fuckin' desk. So I took a medical discharge and got a job as a TV camera man. That way I could still get into exciting situations.

Boy did I. Friends, let me tell you about what happened last year. I was assigned to a female reporter to cover hurricane Katrina as it made landfall in New Orleans. Because I work for a cheap ass company, the crew consisted of me, and Randy the reporterette in question. She was kinda bitchy, but looked damn good on camera. Blond hair, nice enough face, huge DD-cup tits (which were amazingly enough natural, I later found out). Nice curves and sweet ass that said "fuck me".

I, well I did everything else, sound, lights, camera. Fortunately most of it was pretty automated, set it and forget, and all I had to do was point the camera at Randy and make sure her highness was kept in frame.

Randy was a cute kid, but had the one flaw of not listening to others. Very headstrong, she wanted to take risks. Hoping to break into network news, I guess. So while most others were getting the hell out, Randy decides we can get some dramatic footage standing on a roof off Bourbon Street while the hurricane comes aground. We did too, and I must admit it was a real rush being out there - nothing like a hurricane to give you a hardon.

It was in the aftermath that we got into deep shit. Randy decided she wanted to get some footage around town. We didn't know it, but the waters were beginning to rise as the levees broke, plus the looters had already started. Since ignorance was bliss, we loaded the SUV and headed out.

We took a few shots around town, and got uncomfortably close to some looters. These assholes had been ransacking a bar, and were both drunk and armed, firing into signs and buildings - definitely not a safe place. I shoved Randy's sweet ass into the Durango and peeled out. Apparently the thugs decided this made for great target practice as our rear window exploded, along with the rear view mirror on Randy's side. I would have been amused over Randy's screams only I was too busy trying to find dry ground to drive on. It wasn't until later that I noticed she'd wet her pants.

I made it a few blocks away, but quickly realized we were not going to be driving out of there. Water blocked our way, rising rapidly in the streets. "Shit." was my only comment as I skidded to a halt in front of an older hotel, one that was five stories tall. Tall enough, I hoped.

I bailed out, slinging my camera over my arm, and grabbing my emergency backpack from the rear. One thing I'd learned was to keep a pack with emergency supplies handy at all times. I gave it a quick check.

9 MM Glock, 3 high-capacity magazines (two with hollow points, one with the ultra penetrating Talon rounds), spare ammo, two concussion grenades, K-Bar knife, rope, radio, flashlight, oh and some spare water and MREs (Meals Ready to Eat, better known as dehydrated crap).

Yeah, I know, illegal as hell, but my old Seal buds still slipped me a few toys every so often, and in some of the situations I find myself, I hate not to have a few basic necessities along. Like the slogan says, never leave home without it! I grabbed Randy and raced for the front door as a wave of nasty water surged around the corner.

Ever notice when some people get scared they get diarrhea of the mouth? She was yammering nonstop. "What the fuck are you doing? Where the fuck are we? Let's get the fuck outta here!" Hey, she knows my favorite word. I decided to use it myself.

"Randy." I told her in my stern 'I am taking no shit' voice I used to use on the plebes. "I'm fucking trying to save your sorry fucking ass, so shut the fuck up and stay the fuck outta my way before you fucking drown." That got her attention.

The door was locked, fortunately I had a key. They had conveniently placed a trashcan on the curb, which sailed nicely through the plate glass of the front doors. I charged in, Randy close on my heels. Hey, she learns quick!

Running behind the abandoned front desk, I began rummaging through the drawers. "Hurry." Randy said. Glancing up I could see brown water covering the street. Damn, it was coming faster than a 17-year-old virgin on prom night. My luck held out for once, though. In the next drawer I found a key ring loaded with keys. I grabbed them and took off for the stairs.

Incredibly Randy stopped by the elevator and began pushing the button. "Fuck, fuck, fuck." she was blathering frantically as water began to gush into the lobby. Shaking my head I didn't take time to argue. I just scooped her up in a fireman's carry, tossing her over my shoulder like a sack of potatoes. It was then, by the way, I'd noticed she'd wet her pants. Joy.

Despite being out of the Navy, I still kept to the daily exercise regimen. Habits are hard to break, I guess. I am buff. I can bench press 350 pounds with no problems… repeatedly. I say this not to brag, but just to show I was easily able to charge up the stairs, despite the fact Randy was squirming like a kid in need of a piss.

When I got to the second floor, I dumped her on the ground. She landed with a thud right on her plush backside. I said nothing but kept moving. With little choice, she followed all the way to the top floor. I dumped my survival bag in the hallway, and then used the keys to let myself onto the roof. My camera man instincts were coming out. Despite getting soaked from the rain, I did get some dramatic footage as the Durango began floating, and then tumbled a few times before getting swept out of sight by the rushing water.

I heard a quiet female voice softly say, "Fuck." from beside me. I looked over to see Randy, watching our SUV float away. The rain had soaked her through and through, and I could see her nipples straining at her thin shirt. It was then I began to think of her in a more... personal way. Hmm, I knew she liked to say it, I just hoped she liked to do it!

Business first though, so I took Randy by the hand and led her off the roof and back to the top floor of the hotel. I'd lucked out on the keys; they were a master set that seemed to be able to open anything. 9MM in hand, I did a quick recon. The floor was deserted, and there were enough sodas and snacks in the vending machines to keep us going for several days. There was also a storeroom on the floor used to restock the mini-bars, filled with snacks, bottled water and booze. Enough to keep us going for a month, if need be.

I opened one of the suites and shoved Randy inside. Grabbing a spare sheet from the closet, I shoved it into her hands. "You better get out of those clothes." I told her. "You're soaked. If you stay in that outfit, you'll catch a chill. Wrap up in that sheet if you want. I'm gonna check out the rest of the building." She only nodded; I guess she was a bit overwhelmed.

Kids, here's an important lesson from Uncle Hunter: Never Assume. I figured the building was empty, but since I didn't want Mr. Murphy showing up I did a quick but through search of the remaining floors. I had to stop at the second though, as water was halfway up the stairs between the first and second floors.

I returned to the suite to find Randy staring out the window. Through the bathroom door I saw her clothes hanging on the shower rod - all of them, including her thong undies and sexy bra. She was now clad in a bed sheet, tied toga style around one shoulder. It clung to her damp body, revealing her curves in a new light.

Being a former SEAL, getting wet and uncomfortable was nothing unusual for me. Just part of the job, but I figured I was no longer in the Navy, so what the hell. I stepped into the bathroom and pulled off my soggy clothes, wrapping a towel around my waist.

The sun was setting, not that we could see it for all the clouds. All we could tell was it was getting dark. I stood beside Randy, and she melted into my arms. "I'm scared. Hold me." she said.

I tried to be a good boy, really I did. But her soft skin, warm female aroma, and being close to me, well I began to get aroused. And when I get aroused, there is just no hiding it.

Boys and girls, you're gonna think I'm bragging again, but I swear I'm not. It's just that, well, I have a big cock. I mean a BIG COCK. My man-meat is 11˝ inches long, and that's measured on the top… thick too, as thick as a beer bottle and then some.

For a while I thought about getting into porn flicks. But that's when the USS Cole got bombed, and I got all pissed off at the assholes who would do something like that, and decided someone needed to go kill some terrorists and I was just the asshole to go do it. So I joined the Navy, and the porn industry lost its next star. OK, OK, I can hear your bitching, gentle reader, so enough of the flashback and back to the action.

As I was saying, my erection was beginning to get quite obvious, rubbing against Randy's belly. She stepped back and gazed at the bulge in my towel. "Jeez, what the fuck do you have in there?" Her hand reached out, gently touching my hardon through the towel. "Well, what the fuck?" I thought, "go for broke." I gave her my best shit-eating grin.

"I got you an early birthday gift. Care to unwrap it?" Randy giggled, a good sign I thought. With trembling hands she reached out and untied my towel, letting it fall to the floor. Free now, my prick rose to its full glory.

"Holy shit." she said. I get that reaction a lot, but still get off on it. Entranced, Randy sank to her knees and began sucking my prick. She was no stranger to dick licking; that was for sure. I was amazed at how much of my pecker she could swallow. Randy took almost seven of my eleven plus inches down her hungry throat. Felt damn good, too.

I decided I wanted to unwrap a new toy too, so while she sucked I undid the knot on her sheet and let it drop to the floor. Her tits looked great, swaying in the dim light as she went up and down on my cock.

As good as the blowjob felt, I wanted some more. I needed some pussy. I pulled her up to her feet, intending to guide her to the bed, only she surprised me. Leaping up into my arms, she wrapped her arms around my neck and legs around my waist. My hands cupped her plush ass, holding her in the air. She kissed me savagely, then growled in my ear "I like it rough, sailor. Fuck my cunt with that big schlong of yours! Ram it deep."

In a quick move I turned her 180 degrees and slammed her against the wall. At the same time my cock rammed into her cunt, spearing her. She gasped, and then began moaning as I pumped in and out of her. "Harder!" she screamed. "Deeper, oh fuck me harder! Oh fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuuuuuuck!"

Her nails clawed into my back. Suddenly she stopped yelling and started biting me! I could feel her body shudder, her cunt clamped down on my prick like a wet vise. Suddenly Randy went limp, her orgasm spent. I was still hard and wanting.

Turning, I literally threw her on the bed. She landed on her back, bounced once and flipped over in mid air collapsing in a heap. I grabbed her hips and pulled her into a doggy style position. I slid my cock in from behind, Randy gasping as I hit bottom. Damn she was good. Each time I thrust forward she slammed back, forcing my cock as deep as it could go. She had several orgasms as we did it doggy, I could tell from her sweet moans and quivering cunt.

I warned her I was about to cum. Without warning, she fell forward and twisted around. She took my cock head in her mouth and with one hand began savagely jacking my prick. Her other hand caressed my nuts. Her talented tongue put me over the top and I exploded, showering her face and tits with my jism.

I collapsed on the bed beside her, and like most guys did what comes naturally. I fell asleep.

Part 2

I awoke sometime during the night, feeling something warm and wet around my cock. I decided to return the favor. Pulling Randy on top of me, I buried my face in her shaved pussy. Already wet, her honey was soon flowing as my tongue probed her private areas. I was soon rewarded with a tasty treat as her pussy gushed liquid all over my face as she orgasmed.

Moaning, she rolled off of me, and flipped over to lie beside me. Kissing me, she gently licked her own cum off my face. My hands caressed her body, concentrating on her shapely ass.

"You like my ass?" she asked.

"Oh yes, I'm an ass man from long ago."

"Can I tell you a secret?" Without waiting for my reply she continued "I'm an ass fiend. I love getting fucked up my shit chute... taking it up the Hershey highway. And I've never had one as big as yours up there. Yet..." she trailed off hopefully, wiggling her ample ass under my hands.

I needed no further invitation, and moved behind her behind. Even though my cock was still pretty wet from the blowjob, I parted her ass cheeks wide and spit on her anus, rubbing it in with my fingers and even sliding one inside. She purred.

"Don't keep me waiting." she hissed. "Ravage my shitter, you mother fucker." Well, if she was going to be that way about it...

I forced my cock head into her anus. Damn it was tight, but it went in without any problems. "Dammit, I said fuck me!" she screamed. I snarled and thrust forward with all my considerable might. Randy screamed at the top of her lungs as my full eleven-inch cock buried itself in her wanton asshole.

I pressed down on her, pinning her body to the bed with my weight. As my cock continued plunging into her butt, my hands reached around to play with her big jugs. My fingers pinched and tweaked her thick nipples, my mouth kissing and biting her sexy neck. She was pinned, unable to move, except in response to my deep savage thrusts.

Randy was moaning things like "yes, yes" and "don't stop" and I fucked her ass over and over again. It felt like she was on fire she was radiating so much heat. Tears streamed from her eyes, tears of intense pleasure and she orgasmed over and over and over.

Unable to take it any more I gave one last, animalistic thrust forcing my full cock all the way inside her shit hole. We came together, my cock erupting spewing its cum deep into her bowels.

We were sweaty and breathing heavily as I tried to roll off. She was having none of it, and rolled with me. She kept clenching and unclenching her ass, managing to keep me erect. I rolled over once more onto my back, bringing her along. Randy was now lying with her back against my chest, my ass still planted in her hot ass.

My hands tweaked her nipples, massaging her DD cups while I kissed her neck. Slowly my hands slid down her flat belly to her shaved crotch. With a practiced touch (I'm an experienced finger fucker) I began caressing her clit and exploring her pussy with my digits. Moaning, she began returning my kisses, wiggling on my cock.

Her breathing increased, her chest heaving as I got her close. "Dammit!" she suddenly burst out.

"What?" I inquired.

"I... I gotta piss. Dammit. And I don't want you to stop." she added, placing her hand over mine so it would keep probing her pussy. As a SEAL I'd often been forced to piss on myself during a long mission (you can't stop to let your pecker out of your wetsuit when you're doing a two mile underwater swim to take out some bad guys). So getting a little messy didn't bother me one damn bit.

"Go for it." I hissed. While one hand continued fingering her, the other pressed down on her belly, which had the nice side effect of forcing my cock deeper in her wet ass. I heard it before I felt it, that warm tinkle of relief as her bladder released its juices.

I increased the action on her clit as her flow increased, and Randy exploded with delight, having a major orgasm. When she did, she forced down tight with her anus pushing my cock out. I had some odd sensations as it hit the cooler air, then her ebbing flow of warm pee dribbling onto it.

"Damn." she said, kissing me again. "That was fucking nasty. I love being fucking nasty." Randy thrust her tongue deep in my mouth again, then flipping over she began kissing her way down my chest. She got between my legs, and wrapped her big tits around my stiff pecker. Bending over she kissed it, taking my dirty cock into her hungry, nasty mouth.

My length allowed her to give me a combination blowjob and tit fuck, and I gotta say it felt damn good. I just laid there and enjoyed it. I lost track of time, entranced by the feeling of her soft breasts and warm, wet mouth. Her tongue was magical as it licked and slathered me in her saliva.

Soon I felt a familiar tingle in my testicles. I knew another orgasm was approaching, and it was gonna be a big one. My breathing increased and toes curled and she gave a long, slow suck. I erupted, blasting her face with a huge load of cum. What didn't plaster her pretty face landed on her large, fleshy titties. I watched as Randy licked up as much of my spunk as she could, before curling up beside me to a contended sleep.

Part 3

We were pretty nasty when we woke up the next morning, covered in our body fluids. A glance out the window showed the rain had stopped, and the water was actually beginning to recede a little bit. The radio reported the national guard was in the area, and headed in our direction. I figured in a few hours we should be able to find a way out.

I got a couple cases of water, for us to bathe with. The bathroom was beginning to smell a little, sewer back-up I suspected. I figured the carpets were shot anyway, so we just stood in the middle of the room and poured water on each other, and then got soaped up… kinda fun, actually.

We were wet but clean, and Randy could not keep her hands off my pecker. Finally I gave in, and carried her to a room with a clean bed. Throwing her on it, I mounted her, sliding my cock into her willing pussy, giving her a good old-fashioned missionary fuck. She clawed up my back writhing in pleasure as my full eleven inches slammed in and out.

Her face and breasts flushed bright red when she orgasmed. I leaned in and bit down on a nipple, giving her an extra boost. After she squirted hot pussy juice all over our formerly clean crotches, I rolled us over. After twenty minutes, I decided it was time for her to do a little work.

Randy sat upright on my cock, and began moving her hips back and forth. My cock was deep inside her vagina, her breasts bouncing nicely. I reached up and began playing with her big globes as she fucked me good. "Come on dammit, you big stud, fill my twat up with your cream." she yelled at me. "Fuck me good you big horse-cocked mother fucker!"

I do love it when a gal talks sweetly to me. I could feel my cock swell inside her wet womanhood, just before it erupted. My balls pumped their load of hot cum into her hungry cunt. "Oooo yeaaaaa" she purred as I filled her up. "There you go baby. Oh yeah."

Messy again we took another bottled water bath, before deciding we'd better get out while we had the chance. To make a long story short, I filmed a few clips of her doing the reporterette thing at various spots in the hotel, as well as on the bass boat of the volunteer who came and rescued us.

Randy won an award for her "courageous reporting" and landed a job with one of the big networks. I, on the other hand, was chewed out by my boss for losing the company SUV. Still, the new reporterette he paired me with is pretty hot. And, hurricane season is coming! With a little luck...