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Message-ID: <62491asstr$1359155402@assm.asstr-mirror.org>
From: Ed Rider <edrider73@gmail.com>
Subject: {ASSM} Crawl
Lines: 869
Date: Fri, 25 Jan 2013 18:10:02 -0500
Path: assm.asstr-mirror.org!not-for-mail
Approved: <assm@asstr-mirror.org>
Newsgroups: alt.sex.stories.moderated,alt.sex.stories
Followup-To: alt.sex.stories.d


<1st attachment, "Crawl.txt" begin>

Crawl



   By Ed Rider



   "Are you calling me an alcoholic," said Jess.

   "Are you even listening to me," said Charlene.  "I'm calling you an
immature, clueless jerk who refuses to grow up.  Yes, I know you never
drink on workdays.  But when I'm not with you and nagging you constantly,
you just don't know when to stop.  What's wrong with you?"

   "I'm working on it," said Jess.  "You need to give me some space."

   "Just the opposite," said Charlene.  "I need to get in your face.  It's
just pure luck that you haven't been caught DUI yet or killed somebody when
you drive home.  Lately, you've been so far gone that you can't even be
quiet when you come home.  And last night, you barely made it to bed before
you passed out.  It's disgusting trying to sleep next to a stinking
distillery."

   "I'm sorry, Charlene," he said.  "But I promise you that I'm going to
stop."

   "Your promises are worth the paper they're not written on," she said. 
"Have you even made an appointment with a therapist yet?"

   "No, not yet," he said.

   "What are you waiting for?" she said.

   "I think I can work through this myself," he said.  "I don't need a
shrink."

   "Well, I'm getting tired of waiting for you, Jess," she said.  "I guess
it's my fault.  You were doing this in college, but I thought you'd grow
out of it.  As much as I love you, I'm not going to marry you as long as
you keep bingeing, and I'm not going to wait much longer.  If you do this
one more time, I think I might be ready to move out."

   "Wait a minute, Charlene," he said.  "How is that going to help
anything?"

   "I would feel bad about not being able to help you," she said.  "And
I'll feel guilty when I read about your being arrested and imprisoned for
drunk driving or manslaughter.  But if I continue to do nothing, I'm going
to feel even more guilty.  I wish I knew a magic pill that would cure you,
but even if I did, you probably wouldn't take it."

   "Yes I would," he said.

   "That's what you say now," she said.  "What if I could find a pill like
that and put it on the table in front of us next week and you refused to
swallow it?  Would you give me permission to force it down your throat?"

   "I don't get you," he said.  "You're not as strong as I am," he said. 
"If I resisted, you couldn't make me."

   "But what if you were drunk," she said.  "I'm pretty strong, and if you
were drunk, you'd be helpless.  I could force you to do anything I wanted,
and I could force you to swallow that pill."

   "What are we talking about?" he said.

   "We're talking about my question, which you didn't answer," she said. 
"If you didn't want to take the pill that would cure you from your binge
drinking, would you give me permission to force you to take it?  Yes or
no?"

   "What difference does it make?" he said.  "There is no pill."

   "Yes or no?" she said.  "I want an answer.  You know what I'm thinking
right now.  I'm thinking your answer is also going to be the answer to
whether our relationship continues.  So what is it, yes or no?"

   "I guess it has to be yes," he said.

   "That's not an answer," she said.  "I want it simple and clear.  Wait.
Let me take this piece of paper and get a pen.  I'm going to write down
your two choices, and then I want you to read the one you choose out loud
to me."

   When she had finished writing, he looked at the paper a while and looked
up at her.  There was a steely, determined look in her eyes, so he decided
he better not mess with her.

   He read his answer: "Yes, I give you permission to force me to take the
medicine that will cure my binge drinking.  There, are you satisfied?"

   "Not yet," she said.  "I want you to cross out the other choice on the
paper and sign your name below the choice you just read.  Good.  Now give
me the paper."

   "You know this isn't legal," he said.  "There are no witnesses or
anything."

   "Yes there are," she said, "you and me.  We both know you agreed.  When
you get into your car while you're drunk, you're not legal either.  So this
piece of paper is enough for me.

   "If you tell me you've starting going to a therapist or AA meetings or
you're doing anything to work on this, I don't need this piece of paper. 
But I'm warning you, if you ever come home again like last night, I'm going
to put a lot of effort into finding some kind of medicine to cure you.  You
may not like it, but you're going to take it.  I hope I can find the right
medicine the first time, but if it doesn't work, I'll keep looking and
trying medicines until I either find one that works or torment you so much
that I drive you away."

   "I'll never leave you, Charlene," he said.



   The conversation convinced Jess he better do something.  But as much as
he hated to talk about his problem to Charlene, he hated to talk to anyone
else even more.  So he decided to solve it by himself.  Charlene asked him
about what he was doing a couple times, but after he told her he was
handling it, she stopped asking and began encouraging him.  As the weeks
went by, she complimented him and told him how happy she was.

   A couple of college buddies happened to have business trips that brought
them to town at the same time, and they decided to stay over and get
together Saturday night.  Neither of them had their wives with them, Jess
told Charlene.

   "Do you need me to go with you?" she said.

   "No," he replied.  "I'll handle it."

   But he didn't.  He realized later that he shouldn't have let them talk
him into going to the hot singles bar so they could ogle the women.  The
music was loud, and they had to shout at each other and he found himself
losing track of how many drinks he had.  After a while, he was in his binge
zone.  He couldn't remember how he got home, but when he got into the house
from the garage, his mind somehow focused on one thing: not to wake up
Charlene when he went to bed.

   After bumping into a few things and making noises, he decided it would
be safer not to walk.  So he got down on the floor and began to crawl.  He
put all his efforts into crawling slowly up the stairs without making a
sound, but he was so intoxicated and tired that he was getting sleepy.  As
he crawled down the soft, thick carpet in the hallway that led to their
bedroom, he was blinking his eyes to stay awake, but it was getting harder
and harder.  Finally, just outside the open bedroom door, he put his head
on the carpet and passed out.

   That's where he woke up the next morning.  He was still wearing his
clothes, so he quickly figured out what had happened.  He saw the bedroom
was empty and the bed was made, so he took a shower, brushed his teeth, put
on some clothes and went downstairs.  Charlene was in the kitchen.  "I made
you a sandwich for you to eat while you're watching the football games,"
she said.  "I've got to go out." She didn't say it as if she was never
coming back, he thought to himself and wondered what he should say.

   "I'm sorry," he said finally.  "It won't happen again."

   She looked at him, but he couldn't figure out what she was thinking. 
Did she believe him?  Did he believe himself?  Why didn't she say
something? Jess was scared.

   After gazing at him a minute, she said, "I'll be back in time for us to
go out for dinner," and then she turned and left.



   Charlene didn't say anything about that night to him later or in the
next few weeks, except for once.  It was a remark that came out of the
blue, when they were having dinner at an expensive restaurant to celebrate
his birthday.  He ordered two wines by the glass and no cocktail and was
feeling good about himself, when she asked him the question.

   "When you came home drunk a couple of weeks ago, were you crawling on
the floor?" she said.

   "What?" he said, because it took him a few seconds to understand what
she was asking.  "Uh, yes.  I didn't want to wake you up, and I think that
I thought it would be quieter for me to crawl to bed.  But I guess I never
made it.  I don't remember much about that night."

   "Thanks," she said.  "You answered my question." She changed the
subject, and he was afraid to go back there and tell her again how sorry he
was.

   He was feeling really good about himself again a few months later and
was thinking about where to take Charlene for a surprise celebration of
three months without bingeing when he got blindsided.  He and Charlene were
at a hockey game in his company's box.  He had one martini, and her look
told him he wouldn't be drinking another one.  She was talking to the two
other wives who were there, and he and the husbands, three executive
assistants and two of their boyfriends were watching the game and talking
office politics.

   At the start of the second period, the wives announced they were leaving
to go to a nearby mall, and if they didn't return, the men should carpool
home.  "Should I drive?" Charlene asked him, "and you can get a ride home."
She looked at him, and he knew why she was asking the question.

   "No, I'm fine," he said.  And he felt fine and in no danger.

   But after the wives left, the other husbands ordered more drinks, and
they began getting frisky with the assistants.  The boyfriends didn't seem
to care because they saw that their girlfriends were getting horny and
figured they'd be the beneficiaries later.  But the woman who came stag
latched onto Jess as her temporary date.

   She began flirting with him and touching him and continued to drink. 
She told him a couple of times that it wasn't fair that he wasn't drinking
with her.  He finally decided to have one more whiskey, and then the walls
came down.  He didn't remember much afterward, but he remembered entwining
with her in the back of the company box while the others were in the window
seats.  Their hands were all over each other, and he was sure everyone
heard her orgasms as he fingered her.  She wouldn't be satisfied until her
handjob made him come on his pants.  It was a good thing the pants were
dark.  He went down the hall to the john and washed himself off but then
had trouble finding the box again.  She wanted him to take her home, but he
wasn't too drunk to know how dangerous that would be, so he made sure she
got a ride with one of the boyfriends, the one who seemed the most sober.

   Once again, he didn't remember how he got home, but he remembered being
scared when he walked in from the garage.  And after a few bumps, he again
dropped to his hands and knees and began crawling.  He tried to concentrate
with all his might, but he was so tired and drunk that even the first stair
was too much for him.  He fell into a heap in front of the staircase and
hit his head on one of the stairs.

   Before he fell asleep, he saw a light go on upstairs, and it scared him.
He drifted off into a strange nightmare.  Part of it involved his stomach
and strange feelings inside of him.  At the same time as he was
experiencing these uncomfortable feelings, he was outside of his body like
a ghost and looking at himself.

   The person -- himself -- that he was looking at was in a bathroom -- it
was their downstairs bathroom -- and he was expelling solids and liquids
from every opening in his body.  If he wasn't throwing up in the sink, he
was on the toilet.  Everything was streaming out of him.

   There was someone else there in the dream, but he couldn't see who it
was at first.  After a couple of rounds of disgusting stuff pouring into
the sink and toilet, he saw it was Charlene, and she was naked, and she was
dragging a naked body around.  She dumped the dead body into the shower,
and then she got into the shower with it and began washing it.  As she
rolled it over, he saw the face of the dead body and screamed.  The body
was him.  That's when he woke up.

   It was light when he woke, still feeling funny inside.  At first he
wasn't sure if he was awake, because everything seemed strange.  He was
lying on his stomach, but not on the floor or the carpet.  He was on some
kind of plastic sheet.  He was naked.  And all around him were heavy ropes.
They weren't tied to him, but he could feel them covering his body.

   Then he realized why he was feeling funny inside.  Something was pushing
into his anus.  He tried to move away from whatever it was, and that's when
he realized he had handcuffs on.

   He was able to scoot forward away from the thing at his anus, but when
he tried to stand up, he couldn't get further than a squat before hitting
his head against ropes woven together above him.  He saw that the ropes
were in a wide pattern, and he could have pulled them apart and gotten out,
but the handcuffs prevented him from doing that.

   He squatted for a while, but then that became tiring, and he dropped to
his hands and knees.  Then he heard Charlene's voice behind him.

   "That was great, Jess," she said.  He couldn't see her when he turned
his head, so he tried to turn his whole body around.  There wasn't enough
room inside the tangled ropes, but he got a glimpse of her by twisting his
body.  It was enough to see that she was in the rope tunnel right behind
him, and she was naked.

   "What's going on, Charlene?" he said.  "Did you put these handcuffs on
me?"

   "Yes, Jess," she said.  "You're busted.  Just thank you're lucky stars
that I put them on before the police did.  I'm not sending you to prison."

   "OK, Charlene," he said.  "I get it.  Now let me out of here."

   "Not just yet," she said.  "First say hello to Irene.  Look to your
left. She's the one kneeling on the floor with the video camera.  She's
going to be filming your medicine this morning.  See this can of Crisco
outside the ropes.  I was stuffing it into your anus, and she was filming,
waiting for you to wake up.  I got nearly a third of the can inside you
before you finally came to life, but I think she got all your wonderful
expressions as you woke up and began to feel what was happening."

   "I don't understand what you're doing, Charlene," he said.

   "Let me explain, Jess," she said.  "When I woke up and saw you passed
out in the hallway upstairs a few months ago, I realized that you weren't
going to be able to cure your drinking problem by yourself.  Even when you
held out for months, eventually you always had a relapse.  Sooner or later
your luck would run out, and you'd be dead in a car crash or in prison for
years.  That's when I started working on your medicine.

   "I knew it would happen again, so I worked hard to get this ready, and I
finished last week.  I didn't think last night would be the night, but I
knew that I'd have to give you the medicine eventually.  By the way, did
you know you had come on your pants?"

   "I am so ashamed of that, Charlene," he said.  "Will you ever forgive
me? Are you going to leave me?"

   "I've already forgiven you, but you better see a doctor this week to
check for STDs if you didn't use a rubber," she said.

   "It wasn't like that," he said.  "She just used her hands."

   "Good," said Charlene.  "Anyway, you're forgiven, because cheating is
not your problem.  Alcohol is.  Whatever you did, I know you wouldn't have
done it if you hadn't been drunk."

   "That's right," he said, "and you know what, Charlene, I'm going to call
a therapist the first thing tomorrow morning.  I see now that you were
right.  I need help to get through this.  My pride is gone.  Now let me out
of here.  I'm willing to do what you say, because I don't want to take a
chance on losing you."

   "That's great," said Charlene.  "I'm going to help you follow through on
what you just told me, and I know you keep your promises.  My cure is going
to help the process.  And after this morning, the therapy is going to be
easy for you by comparison."

   "No, Charlene," he said.  "This is not the way to do it.  I told you I'm
going to cooperate.  I'm the one who needs to do this, not you.  Now let me
out of here."

   "Not yet, Jess," she said.  "Part of your problem has been that you've
insisted on being in charge.  And you're still doing that right now.  But
I'm not listening anymore.  Tomorrow, you'll take ownership of your
problem, but for today, I'm in charge, and you're going to take your
medicine."

   "But whatever you're planning, I'm not going along," he said.  "You're
not going to accomplish anything."

   "We'll see about that," she said.  "Don't forget, you gave me permission
to force you to take the medicine.  I have that in writing.  I've listened
to you, but now it's time for you to listen to me or else we're going to be
here all day.

   "You helped me think up this cure.  The first time you came home and
began crawling, I was shocked at what your boozing had turned you into. 
You couldn't even stand up like a man anymore.  You were turning into some
kind of animal.  The thought came to me that eventually, you wouldn't even
be able to crawl, and you'd have to move on your belly like a snake.  You
were like evolution going backwards.

   "All these crazy thoughts ended up helping me create your medicine. 
Since you don't mind crawling like an animal, that's what you're going to
do today.  The ropes are braided loosely to form a kind of tunnel, but it's
a transparent tunnel, so Irene can film everything that happens as you are
crawling.  As you've already found out, the ropes are anchored, so they'll
give a little but not enough to let you stand up.

   "You may be able to squat for a while, but I'm right behind you, and you
won't squat for long, because it's easy for me to give you a little push
and topple you forward.  With those handcuffs keeping your arms in front of
you, there's not much you can do.  So what you need to do is start crawling
on your hands and knees.  The rope tunnel is in a circle and goes around
our living room, so you'll be crawling around and around until we're done.
Think of it as a horizontal hamster wheel.  When you're drunk, your brain
shrinks to the size of a hamster's.  It's time to start crawling now, so
get going, Jess."

   "No, I'm not," he said.  "I'm tired, and I'm just going to stretch out
here under your ropes and rest until you come to your senses."

   "I don't think so," she said.  "I explained how the crawling was
supposed to remind you how low you've gone.  But I didn't tell you about
the part that will remind you why you don't want to go to prison for
killing someone while driving drunk.  Here's how that reminder works.

   "Hey, what are you doing?"

   "I just put a finger into your anus," she said.  "It went in easily
because of all the Crisco.  When you're in prison, you need to be lubed up
and ready at all times, because most of the guys who are bigger than you
will be at least this big.  Do you feel my second finger?"

   "Stop it!" he yelled.  "That's sick."

   "I'm just getting you used to it," she said.  "In prison, you better try
to keep moving, because two fingers can easily turn into three, like this.
If you just keep on lying there, you're going to make it easy for your
cellmate.

   "Oh, I see you changed your mind, and you're in a hurry now, like a big
hamster.  Yes, crawl as fast as you can.  I'm right behind you.  Why are
you stopping?"

   "You didn't take your fingers out" he said.

   "That's right," she said, "just like in prison.  The fingers are now
part of Jess.  They're staying in there, and you can feel how I'm moving
them around inside and also slowly in and out.  They're sliding through the
Crisco easily.  This is much easier than last night, when I had to give you
two enemas and a shower while you were dead weight."

   "I thought that was a dream," he said.

   "Maybe for you," she said.  "I also had to clean where you threw up.  It
wasn't a dream for me, but I wanted you all shiny clean for Irene's video.
I think your insides might be totally empty now, and you'd probably feel
hungry if I wasn't distracting you.  After we're done, I'll fix you a big
breakfast if you want.

   "Anyway, the fingers stay, so you need to start moving.  Because while
you're crawling, it's a little harder for me to put fingers in you, like
this.  Oh, that fourth one really got you going, so I'll have to talk while
we crawl.

   "I'm going to put as many fingers in you as I can while you're crawling,
Jess.  You're bigger than me, so you normally could crawl a lot faster, but
the handcuffs slow you down just enough so that I can sometimes catch up to
you and do this.  Did you feel me push the four fingers to the second
knuckle for a second?  I thought so.  There I did it again.

   "I'm going to go slowly because I want to open you up without tearing
you.  I've watched some videos on the Internet, and that's why I'm using
lots of lube.  In fact, I want to put some more Crisco into you now, so
let's stop when we get close to the can.

   "I don't think you heard me, Jess, because you kept right on crawling
past the Crisco.  If you don't begin to slow down now, I'm going to have to
put on the brakes.  You need to do what I say, Jeff, so we can finish the
medicine.  You're not listening.

   "We're getting close to the Crisco, so here go the brakes.  Wow!  I've
never heard your voice so loud and so high.  These brakes really squeal,
but they're effective and so accessible.  All I had to do was reach down
between your legs and grab those round things hanging down with my left
hand and pull back as hard as I could.  Did you notice my four fingers on
my right hand never stopped going in and out of you.

   "Now, stay put for a few seconds.  I'm going to pull my fingers out,
grab a big gob of Crisco and push it in.  There.  Wait till you see the
video.  I opened up a huge hole, and the Crisco just fell into it.  It's
starting to close, but I think I can get some more Crisco in.  Yes, it went
in.  Now here go my four fingers again.  It's time to start crawling.

   "You might think about moving a little faster now, Jess, because I'm not
stopping with four fingers.  I don't think you felt what I just did,
because I tucked my thumb behind the fingers, so I'm getting all five
fingers going in and out of you now.  Look at your rump moving from side to
side.  Are you doing that intentionally, or is it just an automatic
reaction trying to shake me loose.

   "But I'm not coming loose, Jess.  My whole arm is moving with your ass,
and when I can get closer for a second, I'm starting to do this.  Did you
feel a little push there?  I'm starting to make my push to get my whole
hand inside you.  I'm going to fist you just like you're probably going to
get fisted in prison.  But there most of the hands will be much bigger than
mine.

   "I think I got a fraction deeper with that push.  It certainly propelled
you.  My five fingers almost came out, but not quite.  I could tell you
when I'm about to make a push, so you could try to relax your anal muscles,
but it's more effective if you're surprised -- like that.  I really felt
like your muscles were about to let me in that time before you moved away.
It shouldn't be long now.  Maybe a few more pushes.

   "I hear you breathing heavily from all the effort.  If you want to take
a break now, it will make this easier on you and probably less painful. 
You don't have to say anything, because I can tell your voice is nearly
gone from all the yelling and screaming.  Just slow down gradually.  I'm
with you all the way.  Do you feel the five fingers going in and out
slower?

   "OK.  Now to make it easier, get fully upright on your hands and knees.
That opens you more than any other position.  What are you saying?  I can
barely hear you.  Yes, Jess, this is necessary, or I wouldn't be doing it.
You've got to take the medicine, and I think we both already know that this
dose has to be strong, because you don't ever want a second one.

   "There, your breathing sounds better now.  Try to relax as much as you
can while I do this.  I'm going to stop going in and out now and compact my
fingers as much as I can.  Now, I'm starting to push just a little.  Don't
move away like that or else I'll have to push more.  That's it.  Spread
your legs further.  And if you can, try to push out like you're going to
the bathroom.  That will open you up more.

   "I'm not applying much pressure, but your body senses that the pressure
is not going to stop, so it's working on a way to let me get through so the
pain of the stretching is relieved.  I'm so tight in you that I can feel
your muscles as they're trying to make way for me.  They're talking to me
and telling me that you're going to be all right, that you may feel
humiliated right now and be in pain for a week or two.  But they're telling
me that this vile medicine is what you've been needing for a long time to
put a halt to your illness.

   "I feel something.  Yes, yes.  Look at that.  I'm all the way in, up to
my wrist.  That's it Jess.  I hear you sobbing.  Yes, cry, Jess.  Cry away
your binges.  Wash them away in a river of tears.  Embrace your pain and
mortification so that you remember it always.

   "You're already pretty much degraded, Jesss, but I want to make sue the
medicine works, so I have to take you even lower.  For now, let's stop and
let you cry for the camera while I open up my hand inside you and wiggle my
fingers a little so they don't get cramps.  Did you get all the drama of
the hand going in and Jess's reaction, Irene?

   "Good.  Now focus on his anus again, because I'm going to pull out very
slowly.  But before I do that, I'm going to ball up my hand inside him into
a fist.  Now, I'm starting to pull.  Jess, get ready, because it's going to
be a lot harder coming out than going in.

   "My wrist is out now, and you should see how stretched your muscles are
as my fist is pulling them.  That's it.  Keep saying "Ow!" like that, loud
and quick, over and over.  I think that's helping.  I'm pulling slowly, so
the pain is lasting longer and your body is going wild.  But if I pulled
fast now, I think you would tear, and there would be lots of blood, and I'd
have to take you to the hospital for stitches, and it would be months
before the stitches would come out and even with pain killers, you'd be in
pain for a long time.  We don't want that.

   "The Crisco is squirting out around my hand, and I see your anus
starting to pull away from me.  It's like I'm taking off a tight glove, but
at least the Crisco is making it smoother.  Oh, here it comes.  What a
noise!  It sounded like a pop but with a lot of yucky, sloppy echo.  That
was all the Crisco that came out with it.

   "Your hole looks incredible now.  It's huge and empty.  I can't believe
it can get any larger, but we'll see.  For now, I'm enjoying watching it.
It's waiting for the fist to go back in, but now it realizes that it gets
to take a break and it's slowly starting to close up.  It's amazing how
it's getting smaller and smaller, until it's the nice little rosebud that
you started with.

   "When we're done today, you're going to have plenty of time to recover
and get back to normal, but I've heard that prisoners who do this almost
every day eventually stretch their muscles so much that their hole never
gets tight again, and that can be a problem.  But not for you.  You're nice
and tight down there, and we're going to leave your anus for a while now
and focus on your cheeks.

   "I want you to feel the pain that you've inflicted on your family and
friends and -- most of all -- on me when you endanger yourself and others.
What you were doing was totally selfish and self-centered, just like a
small child.  So you're going to be punished like a child.  I'll play the
role of your mommy.

   "I want to make sure you never put yourself in danger again, so I'm
going to do this.  That was good, Jess.  I wasn't sure if I could get
through to you with my bare hand and thought of a ruler or a paddle, but I
prefer this, because it's more loving.  And I see that if I put all my
energy into the swat, it's pretty effective.

   "OK, here's another one.  I'm going to do the same thing as with my
fingers, start slowly and then gradually pick up the pace.  I don't think
it's going to take long to break you down, because you've already been
through a lot.  But hold it in like that and keep your mouth tight.  That
will make it so much more powerful when you begin blubbering like a little
boy.

   "I see your cheeks are already getting a little rosy.  I want to make
them bright red, like a candy apple.  You won't be able to sit down without
a cushion for weeks.  I hear it coming.  You're about to lose it.  That's
it, Jess.  Sob as loud as you want.  Irene's mike is capturing every sound
of my hand smacking your cheeks and every shriek as you feel the sting and
every sob.  And her camera sees every tear running down your face.

   "OK, I think you've almost had enough.  But before I can stop, I need to
hear your little boy voice begging his mommy to stop spanking him,
promising her he'll be good, telling her how sorry he is that he made her
worry about him.  You think up the words, and say them in a tiny, high
voice, like a child.

   "I know it's hard to do while I'm increasing the speed and trying to
smack you even harder, but you can do it.  That's a good start.  The words
were too adult and the voice was too low.  Try it again.  That's much
better, but I know you can do even better than that, so I'm encouraging you
by hitting as hard and fast as I can.  I'm amazed at how much strength I
have left.  I think it's the adrenaline.  Come on, Jess, focus!

   "There, I think you've made the breakthrough.  That's how you do it. 
You actually became the little boy for a while, and you weren't acting
anymore, were you?  It was so realistic that I almost didn't stop because I
was so enchanted.  But I've stopped now, and I'm going to rest while you
have your good cry.

   "We're nearly halfway there, so while you rest, let me tell you about
the rest of your medicine.

   "First, we're going to start crawling around again, and I'm going to
carefully work my hand into you once more.  But this time we're going to
keep on crawling, and it's going to be different.  I won't make a fist. 
Instead, I'm going to keep my fingers as tightly together inside you as I
can.  Whenever you slow down or rest, I'm going to carefully push deeper
into you.

   "I've watched videos on the Internet, and I've checked out the size of
the men and the women who do incredible things to them.  I think you're big
enough and my arm is slim enough that I can get up into you all the way to
my shoulder.  Don't worry, I'll be patient.  I'm incredibly excited about
this, but I'm going to control myself and do it very slowly.  But when I'm
all the way in, you're going to hear my rebel yell.

   "I was thinking about trying to do this with both arms, but I decided I
didn't want to take a chance on splitting you in two.  I'll play with you a
little with my arm completely inside you.  I've got an idea for a cute
puppet show, and you'll be the puppet, and I'll be the puppetmaster,
controlling you from inside.

   "It's just a short show for Irene, and after we finish, I'll pull my arm
out slowly.  Once I get to the wrist, I'm going to start slowly working my
entire hand in and out of you.  It will need some more Crisco, I think, but
eventually there won't be any resistance to it going in smoothly to the
wrist and coming all the way out.  After that's working well, I'm going to
make a fist again when I pull out.

   "Eventually the fist will come out as easily as the hand, and then I'm
going to make a fist going in.  It's called punching.  At first, going in
will be a little harder with the whole fist, and I'll have to slow the
motion to a soft push.  But after a while, when your anus continues to
stretch open to accommodate me, I'll be able to pretend like I'm boxing
your anus and push right in and pull right out.  I can't imagine what it
will feel like to you, but we'll find out.

   "We'll stop occasionally, so Irene can get some good video of your empty
hole getting larger and larger, and then we'll do something even more
exciting.  First, I'll open up my fist so there's more room, and then I'm
going to add a finger on my other hand.  I'll keep adding fingers until
I've got my whole left hand and whole right hand going in and out together.

   "We'll start slowly and then increase the pace.  And then I want to try
what I've seen some women do in the Internet.  I'll leave one hand inside
you while the other one continues going in and out.  Then I start the
second one, but I pull it out when the first one goes in.

   "If I can do it right, it looks incredible, because one hand is always
going in while the other one is coming out, so you're never going to feel
empty.

   "Once I get that perfect, I'll go back to both hands doing it together
again, and I'm going to see how fast I can go and for how long.  When I
finish that, I think both of us are going to be exhausted.  So you should
be loose and relaxed enough for the biggest challenge.  I'm going to make
both my hands into fists inside you and then pull them out slowly.

   "I've only see one video like that, and I couldn't tell if it was real
or computer-assisted graphics, so if I see that you are about to come
apart, I'll give that up, but it's worth a try.  If I can do it, I'm sure
you'll remember it for a long time.

   "Then as long as I've opened your anus up so wide, I'm going to finish
with a little humiliation.  My left hand will easily go inside you, but
instead of brutalizing you, this time it's going to soothe you.  I'll be
gently feeling around in there for your prostrate.  While I'm looking, my
right hand will be working your penis and testicles.

   "It will be like masturbating you, but it won't feel good.  Even though
there will be Crisco everywhere from the stuff that came out of your anus,
I'll be squeezing your penis tightly as I stroke it up and down.  And when
I drop the penis to work on your balls, I'll be squeezing them and pulling
them hard in different directions.

   "The rough friction and pulling will hurt you, but at the same time, it
will stimulate you.  Your penis will not ever get hard and solid, but sort
of halfway there, still flabby but a little more puffed up.  Once I get it
to the right spot, my left hand inside you will press the button.  The
button is your prostrate, and when it's massaged the right way and you're
stimulated, it will release your semen.

   "Your penis will be hanging down below you, and a little of the semen
will dribble out.  That will tell me I've succeeded and that your semen has
entered your penis.  But it won't spurt out, because the pain I'm causing
to your penis and testicles will prevent you from ejaculating.  So I'll be
milking it out of you.

   "I'll start up where your penis meets your balls with two fingers and my
thumb around you and squeeze as tight as I can as I pull my fingers slowly
down to the tip of your penis.  It will look like I'm squeezing a tube of
toothpaste, especially since you have really thick white semen.

   "The semen will ooze out of your penis.  You may feel it a little, but
it won't feel good, because of my fingers squeezing down hard on your penis
and my hand inside your anus.  I may have to squeeze the tube two or three
times to get all the semen out.

   "When I've finished, your come will be out of you, but without you
coming.  I wonder what that will feel like.  You'll have to tell me later.
I'll have you move back up and look at the big puddle of come that came out
of you.  I was thinking of forcing you to lick it all up like the men to do
on the Internet, but I decided that might be too much.

   "Does it sound like I'm excited about all this?  I'm not going to lie
and tell you this hurts me more than it hurts you.  I've had at least a
couple orgasms already, and I expect to have more once we do the double
fisting and the milking.  But I'm not ashamed.  I know that I would never
have thought of this stuff if you hadn't forced me.  Now that my mind is
wrapped around it, it's opened some sexual pleasure zone inside my brain,
and I'm not going to repress it.

   "So what else is there to say?  When you've been milked, we will be
finished, except for one thing.  I want you to tell me and the camera
exactly what you're feeling and what you're thinking.  I don't care what
you say, because my part will be finished.

   "You may say some things you'll want to take back later, or you may
never take them back.  The reason I want you to talk is not for me.  It's
so that if you forget all about what you're feeling right now in five or
ten years, you can watch the video and see exactly what this moment was
like for you.  Your voice and your tears and your words will convey all the
horror, pain and humiliation you're feeling.

   "Of course, people lie to the camera all the time, but I think when I've
finished with your medicine, you will speak the raw, brutal, painful truth.
I expect you to be savage with your words about me, because of what I'm
doing to you.  Right now, you probably hate me like you've never hated
anyone before.

   "That's the only thing that made me hesitate about doing this.  I knew I
had to push you over the edge to have any chance to cure you, but by doing
that, there was a good chance that I would also destroy your love for me.
But I asked myself what would prove my love more, giving in to you and
waiting for that call from the police or the hospital, or destroying your
feelings for me while saving your life?  The decision was painful, because
I know that what I'm doing today may be the end of us.  If it is, I hope
someday you can understand why I did this for you.

   "Well, you're probably tired of my blabbering and you've had some rest,
so let's get started.  You need to begin crawling again, and I need to
start my journey up your colon so we can put on our puppet show.  Oh,
what's the matter?

   "Is my little boy crying?  It sounds like little baby Jess with his
little baby voice is still inside this big body in front of me.  Is little
Jess tired and upset?  Is he scared of the puppet show?  Is he begging me
in his little voice to let him go to bed?  How cute is that, Irene?  I hope
you're getting a close up of his weepy, snotty face?  He's such a darling
little guy.  When he watches this, he's going to feel so humiliated.

   "But it's time for him to mind his mommy.  Here's the first finger as a
reminder that he needs to get up and start crawling or else the fingers and
then the arm are going to be moving inside a lot faster.  Oh good.  I'm
glad little Jess is paying attention.  I was going to give him a couple of
spanks to remind him, but I see that won't be necessary.

   "Around and around the maze we go, Jess.  Awwww, you're crying again. 
As soon as we're done, Mommy will dry all your tears and kiss them away."



   When they had finished, Charlene braced herself for the worst, but even
she wasn't prepared for the filth that came from Jess's mouth.  His voice
was nearly gone, so Irene put a microphone next to his mouth where he was
lying in exhaustion.  Every word seethed with contempt, anger and deep
hatred.  He even said that it was a good thing he had no strength at the
moment because he didn't know how badly he might hurt her if he had the
chance.  He used words she had never heard him use to call her names.  He
damned her and cursed her in horrible ways.

   She tried to listen dispassionately, but as he went on and on in his
soft voice, spewing horror upon horror at her, she finally broke down and
began weeping silently.  She was trying to be strong for him and take his
verbal abuse, but she just couldn't.  She hated herself, because she was
afraid by showing her weakness, she might spoil everything.

   Jess didn't hear her at first, and he kept on talking.  But then he
lifted his head off the slimy plastic sheet and listened for a second.  He
stopped in mid-sentence and didn't say another word.  He just lay there
listening to her weeping for a few minutes.  Then he laboriously pushed
himself to his knees.

   Charlene was still behind him, and she noticed his movement.  She
motioned to Irene, who tapped Jess on the shoulder and then walked ahead of
him a few steps and lifted a few ropes and moved others to make a large
opening.  Jess slowly crawled to the opening, where Irene unlocked his
handcuffs.

   When he got free, he tried to stand up.  But he felt incredible pain
between his legs and total exhaustion, and he fell back again.  He put his
head down and cried, and then he crawled to the bathroom and slammed the
door behind him.  Charlene and Irene watched him.  Charlene couldn't stop
crying.

   Jess took a long bath, and then he painfully stood up and walked to the
bedroom.  He collapsed onto the bed and didn't wake up until the next day.
Charlene wasn't home, but he saw that she had left a tray with fruit and
cheese for him on the nightstand.  He sat up and ate some of it, but then
he felt exhausted again and fell asleep.

   When he woke up, she was sleeping beside him.  He looked at the clock.
It was 4 a.m.  Monday morning.  He looked at her and thought about when he
had first met her and tried to remember the first time he realized he was
in love with her.  He tried to understand how she could have done what she
did.  Had their situations been reversed, he could never have done that to
her.  Or could he?  How could he really know?

   He asked himself if he was still happy that that he felt the warmth of
her body lying next to him, but as he fell asleep again, he wasn't sure of
the answer.

   When he woke up and took a shower in the morning, she was downstairs. 
He painfully made his way down to the kitchen and saw she had cooked his
favorite hash for breakfast, which she usually only did on weekends.  He
didn't say anything to her but used the kitchen phone to dial a buddy.  He
made sure she could hear what he said.

   "Could I stay with you a few days?" he asked his friend.  "Charlene and
I are having some problems, and I need to get out of the house." She didn't
look at him and didn't say anything.

   When he got home, he saw a suitcase in the living room in front of where
she was sitting.  She turned her face away when he looked at her, but not
before he could tell that her eyes were red.  "I put all the clothes and
everything you need for work the next few days in the suitcase," she said.
"Let me know when you want to collect your other stuff, and I'll make sure
I'm not here to make you uncomfortable."

   "I called my buddy this afternoon to cancel," he said.  "I made an
appointment with the psychologist for tomorrow, and my first AA meeting is
tomorrow night.  Is it OK with you if I stay here for a while?"

   "Sure," she said.  "That's fine.  I'll stay out of your way.  I thought
about it, and I think we should be sensible.  We can save money by using
one lawyer.  I know you'll be fair."

   He was quiet for a minute.  "No, you're wrong," he finally said.  "I'm
not going to be fair.  If you try to leave me, I'm going to take as much as
I can get."

   "You hate me that much?" she said in a teary voice, and then she
stopped. "Wait.  What did you just say?" she said.

   "You heard me," he said.

   "But --," she said.

   "No buts," he said.

   "You're acting strange, Jess," she finally said.  "I guess you enjoy
tormenting me now."

   "You're right," he said, "and I plan to continue tormenting you for a
long time."

   That's when it hit her.

   "You're not saying ---?" she said.

   "Oh yes I am," he said as took a step toward her.

   "No!" she said, jumping up.  "No, you don't mean it."

   "Shut up!" he said, and then to make sure she did, he covered her mouth
with his as he pulled her into his arms.  

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