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Message-ID: <58137asstr$1222261802@assm.asstr-mirror.org>
From: "Nuke Danger" <nukedanger@gmail.com>
Subject: {ASSM} DeBriefing by Nuke Danger (nosex)
Lines: 162
Date: Wed, 24 Sep 2008 09:10:02 -0400
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              De Briefing
         by Nuke Danger, 3rd Aye

Dying was no fun.

Being dead may not be a picnic but it hope it beat
being enslaved by the need to eat, breathe, drink
and...  ummmm... eliminate.

So there I was, freshly dead, stepping away from
the body on the hospital bed, the nursing staff
frozen in the act of running to the room I had
been in, when...

"Hello, Henry."

Well, I've been a Christian for a long time and
had seen unbelievers come and go, but I knew Who
spoke to me, for my soul **knew** Him.  I wasn't
too shy to answer, "Hello, Lord."

He smiled.  It was not a particularly reassuring
smile, either.

"I was not expecting you to meet me, Lord," I
said, hoping this was a sign that my life had
made me special.

He smiled, again, in a particularly menacing
way.  "I meet all of you humans who die, for I
made you... so, Henry, you are nothing special."

Well, on top of being dead, that was quite a
buzz killer.  My mouth-- as much as I didn't
have a **real** body, it sure felt like I did--
hung open, as I tried to understand what he was
implying.  I did my best to recover, saying "But
I followed Your Law!  I spread Your Word!  I did
my best to bring people to know You!"

He nodded.  "Yes, you did, all at the same time
that you drove those around you away from me.
Like your wife, who was more my minister than
_you_ were, by cutting her away from the
community that listened to her words and could
know more of my compassion."

"But she was obsessed with sex!"

"Sex you wouldn't give her because you were too
busy being spiritual and pure.  She taught more
of My compassion in the words she wrote than
**you** ever did, simply because many of those who
read her words _needed_ to hear it."

"She wrote _porn_!  Sexual jack-off fantasies!
That's not 'good'!"

"Did you read any of it?  Without being angry
and upset?"

I had to admit, "No, I did not."

His smile was rather more predatory, now.  "You
could not meet her half-way?"

"Her words-- where she referred to me-- were
hurtful and untrue!"

He sighed.  "It is called fiction for a reason,
you know.  And you **might** have learned from her
if you had bothered to read her stories and see
**her** feelings as valid, in their own way.  But,
then, you were so very sure you were doing My
bidding, weren't you?"

"Of course!  I spoke of your love and compassion!
I wrote poems and prayers!  I passed these words
around!  I spoke of Your glory on the InterNet!"

This time He had a smirk.  "Yes, you passed on
these words to people who already thought they
were following Me.  It was strange how many of
My teachings are forgotten.  People are afraid
of Me because of people like **you**."

It was hard to ask Him "Didn't I do any good?"

He nodded, "Yes, you did.  You're dying.  Some
_will_ miss you more than others, despite your
gluttony of the fruit of good and evil."

I frowned, this seemed a non-sequitur.  "What?
Fruit?"

"Once you had tasted the fruit of the tree of
the knowledge of good and evil, you reveled in
the taste of certainty.  It is this taste you
craved-- as addicted as so many others of this
world-- that has brought you to me here and now."

I gulped.  Where was I?

The monitor over the bed beeped once more, the
heart in my dying body, beating once again, and
the room shifted.  A dark shadow had arrived,
not a negative of the Lord, but something far
harder to describe.

"What?"  I asked, confused.

"In your striving to spead My Word and Gospel,
the way you chose to serve Me has been the
antitheis of the teachings you have claimed to
value.  Where you claimed to be unjudgemental,
you judged.  When you claimed to be
un-self-righteous, you chose to look down on
others.  When people shorted you in attention,
money, love or even just basic politeness, you
spent time telling all who would listen to you
about their sins.  It may have something to do
with the fact that you are an _accountant_...
You felt you were under attack by him", pointing
to the dark shadow, "here, because you were
'doing my bidding', rather than realizing that
I was trying to get you off your high horse and
stop being so damnably certain you were **right**."

I stared.  "So, what next?"

He told me "I've arranged for another to
write this down as a piece of fiction... since
you won't be alive to write anything down...
and, while I doubt that more than a few will
read and ponder, even if **one** who learns the
need to doubt their own goodness will, in the
end, make your life something worthy of the
name."

My Maker turned to the shadow.  "He's all
yours..."

The monitor beeped again, my body's heart
having beat one more time.

The Lord was gone.

Instead, I faced the shadow... which, I saw,
was welcoming me.

		* fini *
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