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From: Lazlo Zalezac <lzalezac@yahoo.com>
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Subject: {ASSM} A Different Sort Of Lifestyle 21 (MF, rom)
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Date: Thu, 18 Jan 2007 08:10:05 -0500
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Lazlo Zalezac
http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Authors/Lazlo_Zalezac
http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Authors/Lazlo_Zalezac
 
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<1st attachment, "Life01-21.txt" begin>

A Different Sort Of Lifestyle
Chapter 21: Morning After
By
Lazlo Zalezac
Copyright (C) Lazlo Zalezac, 2006

Relieved to see that her husband had arrived home safe and sound, 
Shirley stared at Daryl stunned by his haggard appearance. He was 
unshaved, his clothes were rumpled, and his eyes were bloodshot. 
She had never seen him look so bad in her entire life. She licked 
her lips nervously and asked, "Where were you?"

"I slept in my car behind the waffle house," Daryl answered. His 
voice was dull and listless. He was tired and didn't feel like 
arguing. He'd spent an hour in his car thinking about his life after 
being asked to leave work. He had wondered how he ended up 
getting sent home from his job.

"How did you end up there?"

"I drove around for a while and couldn't think of any other place to 
go," Daryl answered with a tired shrug of his shoulders.

"Oh." There wasn't too much for her to say. Daryl was basically a 
stay at home kind of man and didn't wander off on his own very 
often. 

Daryl went to the cupboard and retrieved a coffee cup wondering 
why she wasn't asking him about why he had left. After pouring a 
cup of coffee, he went over to the table and sat down. After adding 
two spoons of sugar, he tasted the coffee and grimaced at the harsh 
bitterness of old coffee. He pushed the cup away rather than drink 
more of it. 

At the sound of the lawn mower starting up outside, he said, "I 
guess we need to talk."

"You were right," Shirley said. It hurt her to admit that his get 
tough approach had found fertile ground with Ted. 

"Really?" he asked wondering what had made her change her 
mind. 

"Ted told me that what you were saying was what he needed to 
hear. He was rather upset that he didn't listen to your advice 
earlier, though. He's upset about not having finished the school 
year."

Daryl shook his head while considering how Ted must feel about 
his failure to return to school. He said, "I'll talk to him about that. 
I'll let him know that there's a difference between being a man and 
a superman. No one should strive to be a superman."

"That would be good." Shirley looked down at her cold cup of 
coffee. Getting up, she went over to the coffeemaker to brew a 
fresh pot. Daryl watched her work knowing that she was using the 
time to organize her thoughts. It took three minutes to set up the 
coffeemaker. Turning to face her husband, she said, "I thought I 
could trust you."

"What do you mean?"

"You left last night and didn't tell me where you were going," 
Shirley answered. She felt as if he had betrayed her. He had left 
and there had been no way for her to re-establish contact. As far as 
she was concerned, she had to know where he was every minute of 
the day.  

Daryl thought about how he had felt after leaving the house the 
previous night. It had been horrible giving up like that, but he had 
run out of things to say. He said, "I couldn't stay here and listen to 
you accuse me of not caring anymore."

"But you left me. I was sitting here worried that you were dead or 
dying somewhere and I'd never know," she said. Her tears were 
threatening to flow once again. It was only her anger that was 
keeping the tears at bay.

The coffeemaker started gurgling as the last of the water was 
forced through it. Daryl shifted in his chair and stared at his wife. 
After seventeen years of marriage he knew when she was angry. 
He decided it was time to defuse the situation. Taking a deep 
breath, he asked, "Do you want to see a marriage counselor?"

"No, our marriage is fine," she answered. Getting up, she went to 
the coffeemaker and returned to the table with the pot. She refilled 
her cup and topped his. What she really wanted to do was throw it 
at him and scream, but she knew that wouldn't solve anything.

"We need to do something. My boss sent me home from work and 
told me to get my act together. Another night like last night and I'll 
probably lose my job," Daryl said. 

The idea that he might lose his job was a devastating blow. She felt 
sick to her stomach. Everything they had worked for would be lost. 
There was no way they could make all of the payments if his 
paycheck were to disappear. Clutching her stomach, she said, "You 
can't be serious."

"Very serious. Ever since Ted was attacked, I haven't had a decent 
night's sleep. I can't concentrate and my work has suffered."

"But you've worked there for nineteen years. They wouldn't fire 
you because you came into work looking like hell one day."

"Yes they would," he said. One didn't work in a place for that long 
without hearing horror stories about people getting fired because 
their boss lost confidence in them. Normally, they didn't watch the 
clock, but if they wanted to get rid of him they'd mark down each 
time he was one minute late. They'd mark down if he left work 
early. It wouldn't matter if he'd stayed late the night before. One 
day, he'd show up and be told that he was being let go for just 
cause. He said, "I've already blown my raise for next year."

"Really?" she asked while topping off his cup with fresh coffee.

"I'll tell the truth, I can't take another night of arguments. I'm 
doing the best I can with respect to this situation. I know you feel 
that it isn't good enough, but it is all I've got," he said while she 
carried the pot back to the coffeemaker. 

He watched her return to her chair. He took a sip of his coffee and 
frowned. She had topped off the old coffee with just enough new 
coffee to heat it. It still tasted bad. He got up and dumped the 
contents of his cup out, refilled his cup, and returned to the table. 

"They weren't arguments. We were discussing his problem," she 
said bristling slightly.

"You just don't get it," Daryl said while shaking his head. In a flat 
voice, he said, "You weren't listening to me. You didn't want to 
hear what I was saying. There wasn't a discussion; it was a rant 
with me cast in the role of villain. I didn't deserve that. I don't 
deserve that."

In light of Ted's comments, Shirley knew that he had been doing 
the right things from her son's perspective. It didn't change the fact 
that she thought Ted needed more from him than he was giving. 
She said, "I was worried about him and you weren't acting like 
you cared."

Daryl knew that if the situation with Ted had been more serious, 
then their marriage would have been over. There wouldn't have 
been enough that he could have done to convince her that he was 
worried. If Ted had died, she would have said that he wasn't 
grieving enough. 

Taking a sip of his coffee, he looked at his wife realizing that the 
woman he was looking at was a different woman than the one he 
had known the day before. It wasn't that she was any different; it 
was that he was seeing her differently. Sighing he said, "I thought 
we had a good marriage. We talked about our days. We worked 
together to raise Ted. We even had sex once a week and it was 
okay. The past few weeks have made me look at our marriage 
differently. Last night, I decided that we don't have a good 
marriage."

"What do you mean?" Shirley asked with a sick feeling in her 
stomach.

"I mean, we didn't discuss anything substantive about our lives. 
We haven't discussed any plans for the future or things that we can 
do to be happier. We've been coasting through our life talking 
about the weather. Is that the foundation for a marriage? I don't 
know, but I do know that I expected more from a marriage.

"Even raising Ted, we basically went through the motions on 
autopilot. We got him dressed and off to school without taking a 
deeper interest in his life. Why didn't we notice that he didn't have 
a girlfriend? A boy his age should be dating, but he isn't. That boy, 
Harry, gave Ted more advice about women than I've given him his 
entire life. It is wrong and I don't know what to do about it.

"Our sex has been pretty vanilla and without passion. How in the 
hell did we end up with Tuesday night being our night for sex? I 
mean, Tuesday night? When was the last time that you dressed up 
and tried to look sexy for me? I don't remember when it was. Even 
our anniversaries are pretty tame. Dinner and then come home. We 
rub bodies for a while before going to sleep," Daryl said. The 
disgust in his voice was obvious.

Shirley, feeling sick to her stomach, listened to Daryl knowing that 
every word he was saying was accurate. Their marriage had 
seemed good, but neither really looked at their marriage with 
respect to how fulfilling it was. It had never been tested with 
adversity. They had been coasting. Each of them had their roles 
and went through the motions of fulfilling them. She stammered, 
"We don't need to go to a marriage counselor."

"Do you want a divorce?" Daryl asked thinking that if they didn't 
address their problems they would end up divorced.

His question was too much for her to deal with. Ted had been 
attacked, his job had been put in jeopardy and now even their 
marriage was on the rocks. What had been a very secure life had 
become a very insecure life. Shirley didn't like insecurity. She 
stood and raced to the bathroom. She made it just in time. Bent 
over the toilet, she voided the small breakfast that she had eaten. 
She couldn't see because of the tears in her eyes.

In the kitchen, Daryl listened to the sounds of his wife retching in 
the bathroom. He rose and went in to make sure that she was all 
right. The only other sound was the low rumble from the lawn 
mower. In a way, he wished there was something to distract them 
from their problems, but there wasn't. 

Reaching the bathroom, he rubbed a hand along her back and held 
her hair out of the way. She looked pretty pathetic bent over the 
toilet bowl. It was not the reaction that he had wanted to achieve. 
He had wanted her to look at their marriage with the same kind of 
honesty with which he had examined it the previous night. 

It took a few minutes for her to recover. Straightening up, she 
moved over to the sink to wash out her mouth and her face. She 
didn't speak to Daryl; not even to thank him for his concern. She 
didn't know what to say to him. Her entire life was spiraling out of 
control. The only thing she really had control over was her 
appearance. Looking at her reflection in the mirror, she said, "Get 
out of the bathroom. I want to take a shower."

Her words came out harsher than she had intended, but Daryl 
understood. The idea of taking a shower appealed to him as well. 
He turned to leave the bathroom while he said, "I'm going to take a 
shower upstairs."

"Don't take all of the hot water."

"Don't worry about that," Daryl replied. He closed the door behind 
him. After a few seconds, he could hear her start the shower. He 
went upstairs to the master bathroom. Looking in the mirror, he 
shook his head at the sight that stared back at him. He grabbed the 
toothbrush to get the taste of camel shit out of his mouth. 

Feeling good about having mowed the lawn, Ted entered the 
kitchen and looked around. His parents were nowhere to be found. 
It took him a minute to pick up on the sound of the shower 
upstairs. Believing that all was well, he dug into the refrigerator 
and pulled out the bottle of orange juice. Looking around, he 
decided it was safe and took a drink out of the bottle. The sound of 
his mother clearing her throat startled him and he turned to look at 
her feeling guilty at having been caught. Shrugging his shoulders, 
he said, "Sorry."

Rather than launch into her standard tirade, she said, "Just use a 
glass next time."

"Okay," Ted answered bothered by her appearance, but unable to 
identify why he was bothered. He studied his mother. Her hair was 
wet and she was wearing her house robe. She always wore a 
nightgown under her robe, but there was no trace of it.  It didn't 
look to him like she was wearing anything under it. That was odd 
since his parents were a pretty conservative pair. Even his father 
wore pajamas under his robe.

Shirley didn't know what to do. She needed to have a long talk 
with her husband, but she felt that they couldn't talk with Ted 
around. There was no way that she would send Ted away since it 
wasn't safe outside the house. She sighed and sat down at the table 
while holding her robe closed. She didn't say or do anything 
except stare at the tabletop. 

His mother's behavior worried Ted. He'd never seen her act like 
that before. Usually, she would be bustling around the house taking 
care of it. He couldn't remember a time when she just sat in the 
kitchen doing nothing. He sat down at the table with her. In a soft 
voice, he asked, "Are you guys getting divorced?"

The question struck her like a slap in the face. Trying not to show 
her real feelings, she answered, "I don't know."

"You need to talk to Dad," Ted said understanding that they 
wouldn't talk in front of him. 

"It can wait," she replied with a dismissive wave of her hand.

Normally a very calm and balanced kid, a small kernel of anger 
rose up and took control. Jabbing his finger in her direction, he 
shouted, "It can't wait! You have to talk now! You aren't getting 
divorced without putting up a fight! I won't have it!"

His reaction startled Shirley. Ted had never raised his voice to her 
and the furious expression on his face was frightening. She said, 
"Calm down, Ted."

"I won't calm down, damn it," he shouted while standing up to 
lean over the table while glaring at her. The one constant through 
his ordeal was the firm belief that no matter what happened to him 
that both of his parents would be there for him. Her dismissive 
attitude towards the problems in the marriage undermined that 
belief significantly. 

"Don't swear," she said.

 "Why in the name of hell shouldn't I swear? You're fucking 
giving up. You have no right to tell me what to do if you just give 
up," he said using words that he'd never said in front of his 
mother.

Shocked at his coarse language, Shirley shouted, "Theodore 
Malcolm Brown, you are not to use language like that!"

Looking at his mother as if she were a complete stranger, Ted 
realized his mother was in denial. He turned and ran to his room. 
His world was coming apart and his mother didn't seem to care. 
She stared at the door wondering what had gotten into him.

Daryl came down the stairs in time to hear the last of the outburst. 
Rather than head to the kitchen, he followed Ted into his bedroom. 
He didn't bother to knock since he knew that Ted wouldn't want to 
talk. He found Ted lying on his bed pounding the mattress with his 
fist. 

Sitting down on the edge of the bed, Daryl said, "Young man, I 
understand."

"What do you understand?" Ted asked with more hostility in his 
voice than he had intended.

"Your world got turned upside down two months ago, but you 
knew there was one constant that you could depend upon. You 
could depend on us being there for you. This morning, you 
discovered that it wasn't such a sure thing," Daryl said.  He fiddled 
with the tie of his robe for a second and then asked, "Am I right?"

"Yes," Ted said looking at his father.

"We're having a rough time right now. That doesn't mean it is 
over, just that we're having a few problems."

"She doesn't care!"

"Oh, she cares. She just doesn't want to worry you about our 
problems. She thinks that you wouldn't be able to handle it. I think 
you can," Daryl said turning his head to look down at his son.

Sitting up, Ted asked, "What's the matter?"

"Oh, I think we've forgotten why we married. I know I've 
forgotten why I asked her to marry me," Daryl said. He leaned 
forward and rested his elbows on his knees. Looking at the floor, 
he said, "We just have to work a little to remember."

"She doesn't want to work at it though," Ted said.

"She does, but not with you here. It's a catch 22. She doesn't want 
you here so that we can talk, but she doesn't want you to leave the 
house because she thinks the world is just too dangerous for you. 
Either way, she's fucked," Daryl said.

Shocked at his father's language, Ted didn't comment 
immediately. He knew that his mother was going to have issues 
with him leaving the house without her or his father going with 
him. Shaking his head, he asked, "What should I do?"

"How about calling that fellow, Harry, and seeing if you can visit 
with him for a while? They had a pool. Maybe you can go 
swimming with him," Daryl said.

"He didn't invite me to call," Ted said. His mother was a stickler 
for not imposing on people. One of the worst things a person could 
do was invite themselves when they weren't wanted.

"Tell him the truth. Tell him that you really want to get out of the 
house before you go crazy," Daryl said.

"You mean I should tell him about you and mom needing to talk?"

Daryl looked at Ted for a second and then answered, "No. You 
don't want to stay in the house all summer, do you?"

"Not really."

"So tell him that. Ask him about the martial arts that he mentioned 
last night. Ask him about his dating advice."

"Okay."

Daryl watched his son for a minute and then said, "That kind of 
reminds me of something that I wanted to say to you earlier. 
There's a lot of difference between being a man and being a 
superman. No one should try to be superman. There's a time to 
admit when you're weak and that you need to retreat. There's 
nothing wrong with that. It gives you a chance to heal and come 
back stronger. If you don't recognize your limitations, you'll bite 
off more than you can chew and then you'll be the one that gets 
eaten."

"Why are you telling me that?" Ted asked.

Daryl answered, "You did the right thing by staying at home after 
the attack. Sure, you could have gone to the school and taken your 
tests, but there's no telling how much more you would have been 
hurt."

"But my grades," Ted said.

"They aren't all that important," Daryl countered. He'd have been 
happy with the grades Ted earned in school back in his day. He 
patted Ted on the knee and added, "You'll make it up next year 
because you'll be strong enough to go back at it full force. That's 
the important thing."

"It's just that I feel that I let everyone down."

"Son, you're the only one who feels let down. Me, I'm proud as 
hell about how well you've handled this. You're probably doing 
better than your mother and I," Daryl said while standing up. 
Looking down at Ted, he said, "You're a good son. You've got 
nothing to be ashamed of."

Ted looked at his father searching his face for any sign that he was 
lying. His father's eyes met his and he knew that his father was 
telling him the truth. It was as if a weight had been lifted from his 
shoulders. Smiling, he said, "Thanks dad."

"You're quite welcome," Daryl said. He started to turn towards the 
door and paused. He added, "Now if I can talk to your mother like 
that, things will be a lot better around here."

"You're the man," Ted said. He glanced at the phone in his room 
and said, "I guess I had better call Harry now."

"Will you need a ride?"

Ted thought about it for a minute and then said, "No, I can ride my 
bike."

"That would be perfect," Daryl said nodding his head in approval. 
His son was taking control of his life again. It was a good sign.

"I'll let you know what he says," Ted said. He wasn't going to talk 
to his mother until he was convinced that she was taking her 
marriage as seriously as his father. 

"Great," Daryl closed the door behind him after he left the 
bedroom. It would give Ted a chance to make the call in privacy 
and allow him to stand there for a minute marshalling his thoughts. 
He hoped that Harry would be at home and would be willing to 
entertain Ted for a couple of hours. The discussion with his wife 
was going to take that long.

Rather than head directly to the kitchen where he expected to find 
his wife, he headed into the guest room. He couldn't get far into 
the room. There were boxes filled toys from when Ted was a little 
boy stacked on the floor next to the bed.  The bed was covered 
with old clothes. Her sewing machine, which she hadn't used in 
years, was holding the door open. Reaching over, he opened one of 
the boxes and found that it was filled with paperback books. 

Looking at all the stuff piled on the bed and on the floor around the 
bed, it was clear that the room wasn't ready for guests. It would 
take him about an hour to move enough stuff out of the way for the 
room to be useable. He hoped that he wouldn't have to do it, but he 
desperately needed to get a good night's sleep. 

He left the guest room deciding that he would give his wife until 
after lunch to come around. If she continued to fixate on Ted's 
situation or tried to pretend that everything was all right, he would 
come back and clean up the room. 
<1st attachment end>


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