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Subject: {ASSM} Respect (Revised) Chapter 1 of 4 by Rache (M/F, Cheat, Pregnant, BDSM)
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Respect (Revised)
Copyright 2006 Rachael Ross all rights reserved
Story Codes: M/F, Cheating, Pregnant, BDSM

Note: This story is significantly changed from the original post on
ASSM and SOL particularly in the first and last chapters...thanks for
reading -rr

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

Respect Chapter 1
Fiction by Rachael Ross


I couldn't bear the thought of sneaking around all the time. Going
behind my husband's back to meet a boyfriend. He loves me and trusts
me, so I don't want to hurt him, but I need a little more than he can
give me, you know? He works so hard, putting food on our table, buying
me little unexpected gifts that are just perfect. He's a pretty amazing
guy, my husband, I'm a lucky woman and I know it. So I don't want to
lose him. But, gosh, I just need...sex.

I'm only 20 years old, but sometimes I feel a lot older, just because I
only get it from my husband maybe once every two weeks or so. He's
tired, I know, exhausted from the daily stress. And he does try, but I
hate making him do it, when he's so obviously uninterested. I do buy
sexy clothes for him; you know lingerie, stockings and garters, thongs
and peek-a-boo bras. I'm 5'4" tall about 105lbs, with a good hard body,
a great ass, fine legs, and I got a boob job, so my breasts are
magnificent 34C's now. My face is pretty, my teeth fine, my eyes brown
and hair a long healthy wave of black silk. So, I don't know what else
to do, nothing seems to work with him.

Maybe it's because I'm just not into really weird stuff, you know?
I mean dressing up is okay, it's even fun, but when we first started
dating, and even right after we were married he'd ask me to try
things. But I guess I'm olad fashioned? Or it was my upbringing
maybe, which I'd never thought of as being particularly strict,
anyway I just wasn't comfortable with some of the things he
suggested. But we could still have sex, wouldn't you think? That was
all I really wanted and it was frustrating when he wouldn't give it
to me.

Like I said though, I didn't really want to fool around on him. I love
him. I masturbated a lot, and that helped, but not much. I need a man's
touch. So, I was talking with a friend of mine named Clarice. Her
husband is always there with her, a very attentive man of about 35 or
so. She's 38 and comfortable with that as she's a strikingly
attractive woman. I use her for my role model when I go shopping. If I
look at a dress, I say to myself, 'Would Clarice wear something like
this?' and if the answer is no, then I don't want it. So she has a lot
of influence over me.

I started talking to her one day about my sex life. Actually, I think
she brought it up, speaking at first about another friend of hers whom
I vaguely knew. Clarice doesn't gossip very much, so this surprised me,
but the conversation soon changed to mine, as I said. I told her I was
a little frustrated, I supposed, because my husband wasn't very active
in that department. He had a low sex drive, I shrugged.

"And yours is...high?" Clarice smiled at me.

"Yeah." I nodded and giggled a little self-consciously. "High like
through the roof sometimes, you know?"

"Yes, I think I do." She was smiling at me. "Have you taken a lover?"

I gasped at that. "No, of course not!" I told her. We'd only gotten
married 8 months before. "I thought it was common decency to wait at
least a year!" I joked.

Clarice laughed too. "I have several lovers." She told me. "It really
is the best thing when two people are in love, but just unsatisfied in
that one small way."

I looked at James, her husband who was sitting there nearby, reading a
book and drinking some iced tea. He must have heard his wife's words,
which means he must have known...and didn't care? I wondered about
that.

"Oh, James doesn't mind if I have lovers, do you James?" She smiled at
her husband.

"No dear, of course not." He looked up and smiled back at her.

"See, Lisa?"

"But, uh, excuse me for being nosy, why doesn't your husband care?" I
couldn't help but ask, could I?

"Oh, he probably would if I hadn't had him castrated." Clarice
shrugged. "But since I've removed his balls, he's so much more relaxed
and understanding."

"You...What?" I couldn't have heard her right. "I'm sorry Clarice, did
you say you removed his...balls?"

"Well, I didn't do it of course. I have a friend, a doctor friend, who
specializes in that sort of thing. She's very good; maybe you should
talk to her about Jack."

Jack was my husband. "But, oh...I don't think so. He'd never even think
about that, and besides we want to have children someday, so..." I was
shaking my head.

"Well, it was just a thought, Lisa." Clarice smiled and changed the
subject.

But the seed had been planted, as she'd known it would be, and I often
found myself thinking about what she'd told me. I tried to picture what
my husband would look like without his balls. They really were kind of
ugly. I mean, I know some women like them, but I found them to be
rather...unseemly. A hairy little sack swinging back and forth? Ugh!
Where was the excitement in that?

One night, lying in bed with my husband, I started fondling his cock,
trying to get him stirred up because I was feeling the need. But he
just sighed and rubbed my thigh. He loved me, but he said he was just
too wound up to relax, he had numbers and accounts and clients dancing
through his head. He needed to work extra hard because we needed a new
car, blah blah blah...I'd heard it all before and it didn't make the
ache between my legs feel any better.

I felt his balls, hairy and warm, rolling them around in my fingers
gently. I started thinking that maybe losing those wouldn't be such a
bad thing. Clarice's husband was perfectly normal, very calm, almost
sedate, but a lot of fun to be around too. He was the model of a good
husband, just like Jack. The only real difference was that James
didn't mind if his wife had a lover, whereas my husband...I
couldn't even imagine his reaction.

"Jack?" I whispered.

"Hmmm?" He responded softly. "What is it, baby?"

"What do you think of castration?"

"Huh?" He rolled over. "Castration? Are you getting a dog?"

"No, Jack, I mean like a guy, a man getting castrated."

"Oh. Mmm...I don't know." He started sleeping about then and I rolled
over, frustrated as usual and finding it hard to sleep.

If Jack was castrated, I kept thinking, perhaps I could be with another
man then. I could be having all the sex I could handle and Jack
wouldn't care. He'd still be the same, and I'd be so much happier. He
might be happier too, Clarice seemed to think so. It really could work,
I thought, if we could get around the baby issue.

I spoke with Clarice a couple days later, asking her about that doctor
she'd mentioned.

"Oh, have you been thinking about getting Jack fixed?" She asked.

We were seated in the backyard with a young Hispanic woman, Roselyn,
who couldn't have been more than 18 or 19 at the most. She was
exotic, which made her all the more beautiful with her dark skin and
black eyes. I didn't understand exactly what her relationship with
Clarice was, but the two women seemed close somehow.

"Uh, kind of, I don't know. I'd just like to ask some questions, you
know?"

"Oh sure, I have her phone number in my address book. Roselyn, would
you be a dear and get Dr. Lyon's phone number please? It's on my
writing desk. Thanks sweetie."

"Yes ma'am." The young woman nodded and walked off to find the
information.

"Oh Dr. Lyons really is very good, too. You'll like her I think. She's
been castrating men for years and I've never heard of anyone
complaining." Clarice continued, gazing after her Hispanic friend.

"There are more castrated men in town?" For some reason I'd imagined
Jim as the only one.

"Oh yes, dear!" Clarice chuckled. "Quite a few in fact. Most of my
friends have had their husband's castrated already. It really is a very
trendy thing nowadays, even among newlyweds like yourselves."

"Really?" I was surprised at that.

Roselyn returned with the phone number, written on a piece of
stationary for me in her neat handwriting. "Here you are, Lisa." She
gave me a little smile. She was quite beautiful but there was something
about her dark eyes that was vaguely unsettling.

"Oh, okay. Thanks Roselyn, thank you Clarice." I smiled at the two
women and decided I'd call this doctor and see what the deal was.

-=-=-

"Sunrise Care Services, my name is Peter, how may I direct your call."
A very nice man asked me.

"Uh, Dr. Lyon's office please."

"Thank you, have a nice day." He said and then another phone was
ringing.

"Good morning, Dr. Lyon's office, Nurse Ryan speaking, may I help you?"

"Hi, good morning, I got your number from a friend of mine and I was
wanting some information regarding a, uh...castration procedure?" I
actually blushed when I said it, I think, although I don't know why.

"Sure, I can answer any questions you might have. Could I have your
name please?" She sounded very young.

"My...name? I just wanted to ask..."

"I understand, we just like to keep a record of who calls, the
information is confidential, I assure you."

"Oh, well, my name is Lisa Pavageau and my husband's name is Jack." I
hadn't meant to say that!

"Then I take it this is regarding the castration of your husband?"

"Uh, yes." I winced.

"And how old is your husband, Lisa?"

"He's um, 27 years old."

"Oh, that's a good age to get castrated." The woman told me.

"It is?"

"Oh yes, there's numerous health issues related to the testicles that
first arise in the 25-35 age bracket. Many of these problems are
undetectable by normal examinations until the they become symptomatic,
and by then the medical costs of treatment is much higher, and the
likelihood of successful treatment much lower. So many men who are very
ill today, in their 40's and 50's would be living much better,
healthier lives if they'd been castrated when they'd been 30 or so."

"Really?" I wondered how she remembered all that, but maybe Dr. Lyons
really did have a lot of customers...er, patients or whatever.

"Oh, yes ma'am, that's a medical fact. Of course the biggest issue is
that the medical establishment is largely run by men, if you catch my
meaning, Lisa." She chuckled softly.

"Ah." I said, being a little unsure of what she meant.

"Men being, well, men...They're a little reluctant to publish the fact
that castration as a preventive medical measure is both feasible and
desirable."

"I see." Actually castration as preventive medicine sounded a little
strange to me. I mean I wouldn't want to get a mastectomy to prevent
breast cancer, would I? "But what about, uh babies? I want to, we
want to, start a family and if..."

"Oh we always preserve sperm specimens from all of our patients. Your
husband's sperm would be stored indefinitely, and available for in
utero fertilization any time you desired it. The viability of the
process is right around 98% which means very little of the spermatozoa
itself is degraded, and in general terms it isn't even worth worrying
about since the average patient donates roughly 10CC's of sperm
containing literally millions of healthy sperm cells."

"So I could get pregnant any time I wanted?"

"That's right Lisa, exactly like that. All that is required is your
husband to sign a few forms releasing his sperm for fertilization. He
can sign those anytime and they'll stand up in any court in the
country. Our clinic isn't interested in a hypothetical custodial
battle over sperm;" she giggled, "we leave that to the daytime talk
shows."

"So even if we got...divorced, I could still get impregnated by him?"

"As long as the paperwork has been done, sure."

Wow! My mind was going a hundred miles an hour. Is there such a thing
as too much good news? That made me smile, but still, the whole
castration thing was sounding strange too. This girl was almost excited
about it!

"And, um...what about the procedure itself?" I wondered. "Is it..."

Nurse Ryan reassured me immediately. "Oh, the procedure is very simple.
Unless your husband has complications, such as hemophilia for example,
the castration itself is an out-patient procedure. That means he comes
in and we prep him for surgery, Dr. Lyons removes his testes and excess
tissue, and we suture him back up. It takes less than two hours and
he's back home."

"It doesn't hurt, does it?" I had no desire to hurt my husband, of
course.

"No. Not at all. We generally prefer to use just a local anesthetic,
since anytime a patient is put unconscious it creates small but
unavoidable risks. Of course, some men, many men, would prefer to be
completely out during their castration." Nurse Ryan laughed. "But
unless there's a real medical reason, we keep them awake. Dr, Lyons
believes that seeing their balls removed is also good for the
psychological health of the patient."

"I see." I paused for a moment, wondering if I'd asked about everything
I wanted to.

"Would you like to set up a consultation?" Nurse Ryan suggested.

"Oh! Uh...I don't know, um..."

"It's okay, you probably haven't really had a chance to discuss this
with your husband yet, have you?" Nurse Ryan must have had a lot of
experience with young wives like me.

"No, um...not yet."

"Well, you could still come by, if you like. By yourself, or with your
husband, and see our facilities, meet Dr. Lyons. Especially if you find
it hard to talk to your husband. We might be able to suggest some
methods to convince him of the value castration can add to his
life...and yours, Lisa."

I could almost hear Nurse Ryan's smile through the phone and I couldn't
help but make an appointment with Dr. Lyons for the following week. I
wasn't really sold on the idea, it was just one of those weird
thoughts really, but if Clarice seemed to think it was a good idea...

As we lay in bed that night, I broached the subject again with my
husband. "Dear?" I was rubbing his chest lightly, knowing all too
well that I'd probably get no physical interest out of him. "I was
thinking about that...thing...that we talked about the other night."

"Mmm..." He murmured sleepily. "What thing?"

"The castration thing." I glanced at him but he just lay there.
"Did you know it can be really good for you?"

"Good for me? What?" Jack turned over, onto his side facing me.

"Castration, the doctors say it can be really healthy."

"Lisa." He almost laughed. "What the hell are you talking
about?"

"I love you. I just want to do what's best for you, that's
all." I didn't add that I thought it would be pretty good for me
too.

"I have the biggest presentation of my life in three days." He
sighed. "The president is going to be there, the CFO, all the
department heads..." Jack shook his head. "And you're talking
about cutting off my balls?" He did laugh then.

"Well, I think it would help you." I shrugged a little. "The lady
I spoke to said a lot of stress comes from having balls." I wasn't
explaining this very well, was I?

"A lady? A woman?" Jack closed his eyes. "What would any woman
know about balls?" He rolled over again. "Just go to sleep,
okay?"

He wasn't taking me seriously, I realized. I was just his trophy
wife, not someone he wanted advice from. It made me more than a little
sad and try as I might, I just couldn't think of a way to make my
concern for him any plainer. I really hoped Dr. Lyons would have some
ideas, if not about castration, then a pill to make him horny, at
least.

I kept my appointment, feeling vaguely uneasy that I was alone. Jack
should have been with me, but Nurse Ryan, who turned out to be a very
attractive young girl, maybe 20 years old and just out of nursing
school, reassured me.

"Most of our patients don't come to the first visit." She smiled
and patted my arm. "Their husbands, or boyfriends, even sons and
fathers sometimes, just don't understand how important their
well-being is to the people around them."

I nodded, she was expressing exactly how I felt. If Jack only knew how
much I cared about him, he would have come along. I filled out some
forms in the waiting room. It was a very nice office, well appointed
and pleasant. Not so much like a hospital at all.

There was another woman there, older than I, perhaps forty or so, and
she smiled politely at me. Next to her sat a teenaged boy, looking
somewhat bored and acting the tough, but it was obvious he was nervous.
He was good looking, with short brown hair and a too big t-shirt, worn
jeans and unlaced hiking boots. He looked like a typical teenager and I
largely ignored him.

"Is this your first visit?" The woman asked me, when it was obvious
I'd finished the forms. I nodded. "Husband?"

"Yes, my husband...I'm just getting some information really." I
sounded like I was telling a sales clerk I was just browsing a store.
"I mean, he isn't really interested in it."

The woman stared at me for a second and then laughed happily like I'd
just told her a really good joke. "Oh, they never are! Believe me. I
have a husband and three boys. But if Kevin wants to play
football..."

Just then Nurse Ryan returned and took my forms. She smiled at Kevin.
"Are you ready, Kevin? Right this way please." The boy practically
jumped at the sound of his name and he looked at his mother with wide,
pleading eyes, but when the woman stood up, the handsome youth did the
same. I watched them leave wondering what playing football had to do
with being castrated.

"Excuse me." I caught the nurse as she was walking by. I knew it
was rude but... "That boy, Kevin, is he going to be...?"

Nurse Ryan looked at me, slightly confused. "What? Castrated?" I
nodded and she giggled. "Good heavens, no! He's just getting a
prostate exam for his sports physical." She looked around and lowered
her voice. "He doesn't really need one, but his mom's a
little...you know...overprotective." She twirled her finger near her
right ear. "It won't hurt him anyway; Dr. Lyons is very gentle with
our younger patients."

"Oh." I actually let out a little sigh of relief for young Kevin.
"Uh, good."

Perhaps 15 minutes later I was surprised to see a very good looking
man, dressed in green scrubs with a lab coat over his broad shoulders,
approaching me. "Lisa?" I smiled and stood up, feeling a little
self-conscious beneath his soft brown eyes. "I'm Dr. Prescott, the
clinic psychologist." He smiled and I felt my knees go weak. When he
took my hand gently in his, it was worse. This guy, I thought to
myself, belonged in an art gallery. Or at least in some underwear ads.

"It's nice to meet you." I blinked, feeling my stomach doing
little flip-flops. I could smell him. Not his cologne, not the soap he
used. I could smell him. It was obscene.

"Dr. Lyons is with a patient right now, but I thought I could have a
little chat with you." He let go of my hand and put his palm in the
small of my back, making me give a slight gasp. "Would you like to
come to my office?"

I nodded dumbly, not trusting my voice. I let him lead me gently down a
warm, carpeted corridor and into a spacious office with a nice view.
There was a desk, of course, but also a comfortable chair and small
sofa, a love seat really, arranged in the corner. We moved there and I
sat on the loveseat. I declined his offer of coffee and watched as he
sat in the chair, leaning forward so that we were very close.

"Now you're here about your husband, right?"

"Yes, uh, yeah...Jack, my husband." I was looking into the
doctor's eyes and having a very hard time remembering what my husband
even looked like.

"So, I understand that you're interested in having him
castrated." He nodded to himself. "But..." He smiled, inviting me
to explain.

"But, uh...He's not very...interested." I admitted. "He
doesn't really take me seriously."

Dr. Prescott nodded in understanding. "We'll talk about Jack in a
moment. Why do you think it would be good to have this procedure?"

"Well, um...I love him." I had to say that. "I...he's under a
lot of stress, at work. Maybe if he were...fixed..." I smiled weakly.
"It would make things easier for him."

The truth was I wasn't sure if I wanted him to have that procedure or
not. I mean I knew all the selfish reasons, especially since Clarice
and James seemed so happy, but now that I was actually sitting there, I
felt like an actress saying what I did. It was like I'd put myself in
a hole and I really had no choice but to keep digging.

"I see." Dr. Prescott pursed his lips. "The testicles can
certainly contribute to emotional as well as physical problems,
especially if the patient works in a high-stress environment." He
paused. "How is your personal life, Lisa?"

"What?" I frowned slightly. "My...personal life?"

"Yes." He shrugged. "Your sex life. Are you satisfied by your
husband?"

I made a face and Dr. Prescott smiled. "Uh, no. I'm not
satisfied."

"You realize that once your husband is castrated he'll lose
virtually all interest in sex."

It was my turn to laugh. "That would be an improvement, Doctor,
believe me." I closed my eyes. "Jack has no interest in sex now."

"Okay." Dr. Prescott looked at me, leaning back into his chair.
"So, tell me, Lisa...What specifically is your interest in this? Your
personal benefit from castrating your husband?"

"I..." I wasn't sure I wanted to answer this beautiful man,
doctor or not. "I'm only 20 Doctor." I folded my arms across my
breasts protectively. "I need...sex. I guess." I hoped that
didn't make sound like a slut or something and I could feel my face
reddening slightly.

"Well, of course you do, Lisa." He laughed and I blushed hard then.
"So how does this help?"

"I want to...to take a lover." I looked down. "And maybe
if...if...Jack was castrated..."

"He wouldn't care?" Dr. Prescott offered. "You'd feel
justified having a relationship, a sexual relationship, outside the
normal bounds of marriage?"

"Yes." I looked up, as if daring the man to disapprove me. "I
won't cheat on him. Not now, like this...I can't."

"But if he were castrated and unable to perform, you think
he'd...approve?" Dr. Prescott arched his eyebrows. He didn't wait
for my obvious reply. "What if he didn't approve?"

"If he...didn't?" I hadn't thought about that. "I don't
know. I-I'd..."

"Would it matter to you? Really? Would it bother you having an affair
with another man, knowing your husband disapproves..." he smiled.
"And knowing at the same time that he was powerless to give you the
satisfaction you need?"

"But he doesn't give it to me now..." I was feeling confused.

"But right now you're not having an affair. Is it because he
wouldn't approve? Or is it because he maintains at least the
potential to give you pleasure?"

"I don't know."

"Are you afraid of your husband, Lisa?"

"What? No! No, not at all." I shook my head.

"Then why are you afraid of having an affair?" He asked reasonably.

"Because...uh, because he's my husband. I love him." I looked out
the windows briefly. "I respect him too much to do that to him."

"And so what would be the difference if he was castrated?"

"I'm...I don't know."

"You'd still love him?" Dr. Prescott asked.

"Of course, yes. Always." I had no doubt in my heart.

"Then...if it isn't fear, as you've said. And you'd still love
him...then what changes?" He smiled and held out his hands.

"Respect?" I wondered softly.

"Can you respect a man with no balls, Lisa?" Dr. Prescott made it
sound like the very idea was repugnant.

I thought about it carefully. I'd still respect my husband, I mean as
a husband. As the person who loved me, who supported me. But as a man?
Was he a man? Would he still be without his testicles?

"Lisa?" The Dr. prodded gently.

"No." I whispered, feeling the words escape my lips like a small
betrayal.

"No." Dr. Prescott agreed. "Of course you couldn't. A beautiful
woman like you. A woman who needs so much, and has so much to offer to
the right...man." He shook his head sadly. "You can't respect him
now, can you? As a man?"

I shook my head sadly, feeling bewildered more than anything else. I
felt like Dr. Prescott had just spun me around a whole bunch of times
and I was going to fall down any second. Did I really feel this way? I
wasn't sure at all. But Jack couldn't even make love to me more
than a few times a month. A real man, I was sure, would take me every
chance he had. In every possible way he could ever want. He would do
things to me...awful, terrible and beautiful things to make my body
scream with ecstasy. My husband wasn't really a man at all, or so it
somehow seemed. And if I understood what this doctor was telling me
then I didn't respect him at all, did I.

"I..." I licked my lips, trying to find words for the thought
forming in my mind. "I could respect him again, if he was
castrated...couldn't I, doctor?"

"Of course you could." He smiled and nodded, plainly happy with me,
but hat just confused me even more. I'd almost thought he was trying
to talk me out of it.

Just then there was a knock at the door and an auburn haired woman
entered the room, smiling. She was dressed in scrubs as well, with a
lab coat and carrying a clipboard. She was tall and thin, with a pretty
face. Her blue eyes were bright and her smile genuine.

"Ah, Dr. Lyons." Dr. Prescott stood up. "I was just speaking with
Lisa, getting a feel for her situation."

"Good, good!" Dr. Lyons nodded and walked over, shaking my hand.
"I'm Theresa Lyons, it's so nice to meet you, Lisa." She sat
down next to me and Dr. Prescott took his chair again. "I've looked
over your file, just briefly. So, you're interested in having your
husband castrated?"

"Yes." I nodded.

"And you've had a little chat with Dr. Prescott." She looked at
her colleague. "How was that?"

"Well..." He looked at me. "I'm not sure Jack, Lisa's
husband, is really a good candidate for the procedure, frankly."

I stared at him, wondering what he was saying.

"The issue isn't so much Jack's health, or his present physical
condition. If he was...mmm...exhibiting deviant sexuality, was sexually
addicted, or if he was simply prone to serial infidelity..." He gave
me a little smile. "...In such cases castration is a preferred and
very successful form of treatment. But this isn't the case here.
Jack's lack of interest in sex has resulted in the inability of Lisa
to recognize his traditional role as the dominant partner in their
marriage. She can't respect him as a man. She loves him, obviously,
cares about him and responds to Jack's ability to support her..."

"Do you agree with Dr. Prescott, Lisa?" Dr. Lyons was tapping her
pen against her clipboard softly.

"I...I guess so, yes." I nodded. I wasn't really prepared to
dispute him; I just hadn't expected the man to speak so bluntly.

"I haven't spoken to Lisa's husband about this, of course, so I
can't predict how he would react emotionally. Lisa's hope is that
he would approve and even encourage her in seeking extra-marital
affairs. My belief, my instinct...based in a large part on my
observations of Lisa...are that Jack is a competitive, even protective
individual, who would not willingly approve any such activities."

"What...uh, what does that mean?" I asked.

"It means, Lisa, you're a trophy wife. You're Jack's trophy
wife and unless I'm very much mistaken, losing his balls is going to
have very little to do with giving up something so important to his
self-image. In fact, the effect achieved may be the opposite of what is
intended. He might be inclined to paranoia, exemplified by fits of
jealous rage."

"What?" I sounded shocked because I was. Jack going into a jealous
rage? I would never believe it. "But I thought castrated men
were...more calm. Had less testosterone or whatever it is."

"That's true dear. But the response that concerns us is caused by
your husband's personality, his ego to put it in the simplest terms,
and that does not change overnight." Dr. Lyons nodded and her voice
softened. "We're not saying that's what will happen, of course.
Once Dr. Prescott is able to meet your husband it becomes much easier
to predict his reaction. But we do have a lot of experience to draw on
and your story is not an unfamiliar one by any means."

"You want to meet him? My husband?" I wondered how I would ever
talk Jack into coming to the clinic.

"That is the next logical step, Lisa." Dr. Prescott nodded. "It
can be very informal, the information I need is fairly simple to gather
from just a normal conversation really."

"So you're saying Jack doesn't need to know that you're a
doctor?"

"Exactly." He smiled. "Your husband doesn't even need to come
to my office, we could meet anywhere he would feel most comfortable."

"But please keep in mind Lisa, castration is not always the best
option." Dr. Lyons told me. "You can't plan on it, okay? There
are many considerations and there are other options available to you as
well."

"What other options?" I looked at her, knowing I'd had my heart
set on castrating my husband.

"Well, we can talk about those another time. After Dr. Prescott is
able to make a better recommendation." She patted my knee. "I need
to see another appointment, but you just be patient, okay?" She gave
me a warm, sympathetic smile and left.

Dr. Prescott rose and I stood up then as well, thanking him. I told him
I'd give him a call in a day or two and hopefully we'd be able to
schedule something, a time when he could meet my husband. I offered him
my hand and he took it gently, smiling.

"Lisa, before you leave..." He looked into my eyes. "I was
wondering if you'd do something for me."

"Oh?" I gave a little smile of my own. "What's that, doctor?"

"Get on your knees and suck my cock for me." He put his hands on my
shoulders as I stood there, my jaw hanging open in shock. "Go on, be
a good little slut."

"Excuse me?" I felt my heart stop and I couldn't breathe. "I
don't...No! I can't!" I tried to sound indignant, but I made no
effort to slap his face, like I should have done. Or even to leave the
man's office.

"Yes you can." He spoke gently, reassuring me even as his hands
pressed down on my shoulders, urging me to do as he demanded. "You
don't respect Jack anyway, do you? Why should you suffer for a man
you can't respect, Lisa?"

"But I..." My breasts heaved as I blinked into the doctor's face,
trying to find an argument, or a reason not to do what we both wanted.

"Shhh...You need this, even more than you know, Lisa. You need a man
you can respect, a real man who wants you." I felt my strength
weakening, like my willpower was draining away with every word the man
uttered. "Jack lost his balls a long time ago, didn't he Lisa?"

"Wha...what?" I was looking up at him as my knees touched the
carpet.

"Take it out, go on, Lisa..." He coached me gently.

"I don't...I can't...please, don't make me..." I was pleading
with him, but my hands had gone to his trousers, feeling the largeness
trapped inside.

"Shhh...don't say that...just do it..." He laughed. "You need a
strong man, don't you Lisa?"

I nodded, swallowing hard. "Yes." I whispered as I unzipped his
pants, reaching into the warmth and finding his semi-hard cock. It felt
huge in my hands and I pulled it free, gasping at the size of his
organ.

"A real man, Lisa." He put a hand on my head, stroking my hair.
"With real balls, who isn't afraid to take a woman if he
wants..."

"Yes..." I whispered again and I had to hold his lengthening penis
in both hands. It had to be 8 or maybe even 9 inches long and so thick
that my fingers couldn't even go all the way around it! It was
nothing like my husband's cock, which wasn't really small, just
average.

"Suck it now...wash my big dick, Lisa...Show me how bad you want to
fuck it!" He was pulling my head closer and I groaned with my
embarrassing desire as I let him, opening my mouth for that huge
swollen head and letting it stretch my lips wide. I'd never done this
before, not even for my husband, and I shuddered at the thought of
doing it now for a total stranger.

"Too big?" Dr. Prescott laughed. "Lick it first then, get it nice
and wet and then we'll make it fit, Lisa!"

I licked his shaft up and down, letting my saliva run across his hot
flesh, working my hands back and forth until it was shiny and dark,
pulsing in my hands. I ran my tongue along the underside, around the
crown and tickled that hard beautiful cock everywhere I could. I kissed
it, spit on it, and let it slide across my lips and cheeks and nose.

"Take out my balls, Lisa...Wash them for me!"

I nodded, as though I were in some sex induced trance, and pulled his
balls free so they hung like two huge plums trapped in his silky soft
wrinkled sack. I felt them gently, marveling at their size and weight
as I hefted them in my hand. Dr. Prescott pulled me closer, urging me
to take them into my mouth, one at a time, and wash them thoroughly
with my tongue. I sucked the man's balls tenderly, savoring his male
scent and salty taste. Here was a real man, I knew, a man to be
respected and worshipped!

When Dr. Prescott had enough of my mouth on his balls, he pulled my
head back, his fingers twisting in my hair. He stroked his huge cock
briefly and aimed it at my mouth, pushing the swollen head between my
parted lips. "Suck it Lisa, oh! Suck it you beautiful bitch!" He
pushed his cock into my mouth, even though I was unprepared for it, but
that only made it better!

I felt my lips being stretched taut around him, his cockhead seeming to
fill my mouth completely, leaving no room for my tongue or even my
teeth. He grunted, holding my head tight in his hands while I braced
myself against Dr. Prescott's powerful thighs. I dug my fingernails
into his legs as he pushed, shoving that great prick inside me another
inch and making me gag loudly.

"Choke on it!" He laughed. "Go ahead! I'm not stopping until
you take it all!"

His words seemed cruel and frightened me, but at the same time I
understood his need to dominate me totally. To use me and I wanted it!
I wanted him to treat me that way, fucking his cock into my mouth and
deeper, into my throat until I had every thick hard inch of him inside
me.

"Open up, Lisa! Come on girl, or it's gonna hurt!" Dr. Prescott
warned me.

I tried hard to open for him, forcing myself to swallow and hold that
position, with my throat open. His cock was so huge though, it was
forcing tears to leak from my tightly shut eyes, running down my red
cheeks. I felt him shoving again and suddenly there was a peculiar and
almost painful popping sensation as his cock found itself in my throat
and Dr. Prescott pushed hard then, sinking inside me until his balls
pressed against my chin and my nose was buried in his public hair.

"Ahhhh! Fuck yeah! Lisa! You did it!" He held me like that a moment
and then pulled slowly back, letting me take a breath and gasp a
little. "Let's do it again!"

Over and over he pushed his big dick into my throat, until finally I
was taking him, if not easily, then at least with only small
difficulty. He was fucking my throat slowly, moving in and out and I
loved it. My face was impaled on his great cock and I had the horribly
wicked thought that I wished my husband had been there to see it!

"That's enough!" Dr. Prescott chuckled as he pulled his cock out
of my mouth completely. "Bend over the couch, Lisa. I want to fuck
you now."

"Oh yessss!" I breathed. "I want it!" I'd never even seen
such a huge cock in my life and my pussy was soaked already. I wanted
it inside of me; I wanted to know what that monster felt like inside my
burning pussy!

He pushed me down, over the back of the leather loveseat and yanked my
skirt up, over my hips. "God! What a fine ass!" He slapped my ass
hard and I yelped, wriggling slightly as he grabbed my panties,
deliberately ripping them with his hands. He pushed a finger into my
anus with no warning at all, just shoved his thick digit deep into my
tight virgin asshole and making me hiss with pain. "Maybe I should
fuck you there, Lisa! You ever been ass fucked?"

"N-No! No...never...!" I moaned and my body instinctively recoiled
at the thought of taking him there.

"I bet a slut like you would love it, huh?" he spanked my ass hard
again, twice...three times, making it sting nicely. "Answer me!"

"Yea...yeeesssss!" I looked over my shoulder. "Yes!"

"Next time!" He laughed. "I'll give you a couple days to think
about it..." Dr. Prescott pulled his finger out and reached around,
pushing it into my mouth. "Suck it, Lisa!" He hooked his finger,
pressing it into the inside of my cheek like a fish hook while I
tongued it. "Clean that finger for me, bitch!"

A moment later he was rubbing my steaming cunt with that same finger,
spreading my labia and telling me how wet I was. All I could do was
moan and push myself back against him. I bit my lip as I felt Dr.
Prescott bring his immense cock to my pussy, rubbing the head up and
down my slit.

"Are you on the pill, Lisa?" he asked me and I shook my head.

"I-I'm trying to get...P-Pregnant..." I sighed. "With...M-My
husband."

"Well, I'm not going to pull out, bitch." He chuckled and slapped
my ass again. "I'm not going to use a condom either...Do you still
want me to fuck you?"

"Ohhh...God!" I wanted a baby, a baby with Jack so badly...But that
huge cock, rubbing up and down my slit felt so good. And this was a
man, a real man... "Do it! Please...Oh please! Fuck me!"

He laughed and grabbed my right arm, pulling it back. "You want it?
You have to prove it, Lisa! Put it in...Put my big cock in your pussy,
slut!"

I groaned, feeling for his penis and squeezing it as my fingers found
him. I pulled him closer, feeling blindly for the entrance to my
fertile womb. I rubbed his cock across my wanton cunt until it found
purchase and I pulled him harder, urging Dr. Prescott to push it in me.

"Ahhh...fuck your hot!" he said with a sigh, grabbing my hips in
his strong hands. "Feel free to scream, Lisa...Everybody knows what
we're doing and this is gonna feel so good!"

Everybody knows? I wondered at that, but only for a brief second before
he was pushing that huge slab of meat into my too small cunt. I did
scream as he squeezed my flesh in his strong hands, getting a better
grip and then lunging forward with his hips, spearing his cock all the
way inside me. The rush of pain and pleasure was a heady combination
and I arched my back, crying out loudly as he bottomed out, the head of
his penis smashing into my cervix.

He fucked me hard for a long time, making me cum over and over again on
his cock until I could barely lift my head. I was being worn out by
this man, this real man, who seemed to have all the stamina in the
world. He slowed down at one point, letting me catch my breath.

"How's that cock feel, Lisa?" He pulled my head up by my hair,
twisting it so he could see my face as he worked his cock slowly inside
me.

"G-Good...Sooooo good!" I gasped and he laughed, reaching
underneath me to pull at my blouse, popping off some buttons and
yanking hard at my bra until it came free. He grabbed my breasts and
then lifted me, actually pulling me off the sofa so I was impaled on
his cock and carried somewhat roughly in his arms.

He walked me over to his desk, putting me on my belly and started
fucking me again, slamming his great prick in and out so that even that
big heavy desk was rocking back and forth beneath us. A few minutes
later he was finally close and he pushed himself as far inside me as
he'd ever gone, even when he'd lifted me.

"Here it comes, Lisa! Oh fuck!....Yeaaaahhh!!" His cocked seemed to
swell even larger, if that was possible and it jerked noticeably inside
me as his hot sperm erupted inside me. It jetted onto the bruised
pillow of my cervix, flooding me with an incredible and distinct warmth
that I'd never experienced before.

It triggered another orgasm of my own and I screamed with the insane
pleasure of the moment. Both of us cumming hard at the same time, our
juices mixing in my womb, bathing my eggs with it. Another man, a real
man had finally taken me, used me the way I'd always wanted and it
was fantastic! Right at that moment I didn't care if I was getting
pregnant, I didn't care what my husband would think or say, I
didn't respect him enough for that...All I knew was that I wanted
this, real sex with a real man.

But such moments pass.

I drove home slowly, shaking inside and out as I tried to concentrate
on the traffic around me, but it was hard. I had left the clinic
feeling suddenly ashamed. Dr. Prescott had fucked me; there was no
other word for it. He'd taken me and filled my womb with his potent
sperm, and then waited, holding me down as if to make sure his seed had
opportunity to find my egg.

At the time I'd felt nothing but arousal, almost euphoric ecstasy and
I bathed in the knowledge that a real man had taken my husband's
wife. He'd pulled out finally, his cock still semi-hard, and given me
a small slap on my ass, chuckling as he zipped himself up. He told me
to make sure and call the office, to let him know when he could see me
again, when he could meet my husband.

He was done with me then, our appointment finished and with it the
sensations that I'd enjoyed so much. I'd reached down, feeling my
loose and puffy sex, soaked with our juices and leaking the doctor's
semen only slowly; most of it remained deep in my womb like a warm
stain on my soul.

What had I done?

I dressed quickly, worried that someone might catch me there in
Prescott's office and see me like that. Or smell our recent union in
the air. I snuck out like a criminal, fleeing the scene of a crime, my
eyes down and face red. My heart was pounding, but for a far different
reason than it had just a short time before.

"Ma'am? Miss Pavageau?" The receptionist, Nurse Ryan stopped me
and I swallowed nervously, afraid to look at the girl, but somehow I
did. "Would you like to schedule a follow-up?" She was smiling.

"Oh, uh..." I shook my head. "I haven't talked with my husband
yet, I..."

"Oh not for him!" The girl laughed and then leaned close over the
counter. "I meant for you, with Dr. Prescott...You know..." She
lifted her eyebrows suggestively.

"W-What?" I stared at her for a second and I couldn't think of
anything to say. I just turned and walked quickly towards the doors, my
entire body flushing with embarrassment.

"I'll pencil you in for next Wednesday, okay? Two o'clock." She
giggled and I almost fell running down the shirt stairs and outside.

I loved my husband. I hadn't meant what I'd said at all, how could
I possibly not respect the man I married? Because he didn't have sex
with me often enough? Was that even a reason? He took good care of me,
always. He was patient and tender, thoughtful of the little things I
loved. I'd married him because I loved him, not because he could fuck
me and laugh about it the way Prescott had.

Who was the real man here, I thought, driving through a veil of tears.
Some doctor, a stranger I didn't even know who had known what buttons
to push, played some little game with my head to bend me over? Or the
man who loved me and cared enough to be honest with me, even if he
couldn't always find the right way to give me pleasure?

I was driving in circles, afraid to go home. My husband would be at
work, I knew, but part of him was waiting for me anyway. It was our
home, the place where we lived together. Where we ate and slept and
talked and made love, not often perhaps, and not as much as I desired,
but that's what it was. Making love. I couldn't go back there. I
didn't live there anymore, I didn't deserve to.

It was Clarice's fault, I told myself, wiping my eyes with my
fingers. She was the one who'd planted that silly idea in my head.
Her and her husband. He was a man I couldn't respect, and so I
couldn't respect her either. Not anymore. She'd been so eager to
help me, to suggest that I fix my problem by fixing my husband. Well I
had news for her, my husband wasn't broke! I was the one, me, I had
listened to someone I thought I'd admired and now look at me.

I parked the car near the curb, sobbing and pressing my hands against
my tummy. I was probably pregnant now, just a few tiny cells, too small
to see, growing and replicating and attaching themselves to me forever.
I had betrayed my husband, betrayed my wedding vows and my family, my
parents who had raised me. I'd done all that just for a few minutes
of pleasure with a man I barely knew and would never love.

I didn't want to see Clarice. Not that I was afraid of her, only that
I had nothing to say to her. She'd just spoken the words, I'd done
the listening. It was all on me and I'd never felt so ashamed in my
life.

"Miss?" There was a tapping at my window and I was startled by the
policeman tapping on the glass.

I wiped my eyes quickly and licked my lips, looking around like I'd
forgotten where the switch was for the window. I rolled it down,
apologizing and blushing at my appearance.

"I'm sorry, I was..."

"Are you okay?" He was asking me, looking at me and then around
inside the car as if I might be hiding something.

"Yeah, yeah...I just uh, I got some bad news." I was nodding.
"I'll...I'm going home."

"Where do you live?"

"Just there, over there on Maple Court." I glanced in the direction
of my house.

"I'm not sure you should be driving..."

"Oh, I'm fine." I tried to smile. "Really, I'm...I'm okay,
officer."

"I'll follow you, alright?" He told me and there was little room
for argument and I had no choice at that point. I was going home.

I spent an hour in my bathtub, washing myself thoroughly and then
washing myself again. I had a lot of sperm inside me and my sex was
stretched and loose around my fingers as I pressed them inside,
wriggling and trying to get every last drop of Dr. Prescott's gift.
But it was too late, I was sure.

I washed my clothes, everything I'd worn, not caring about colors or
whites or hand washing or any of that. I threw them all in the washing
machine and added twice as much detergent as I needed and turned it on.
I'd wash them twice, or three times, or maybe I'd just throw them
away. I wasn't crying at least, not anymore, but I wanted to.

Especially when I laid down on my bed, on my husband's bed. It
wasn't mine anymore, or ours, it was his alone. I was just borrowing
it, borrowing the memories. I could smell him, I thought, on his shirt
that I was wearing, on the sheets and pillows. His cologne, his sweat.
I looked through our photo album, the thick white one with golden
letters. Our wedding album and I wondered who that woman was.

I stared at the pictures one by one, studying every aspect, every small
detail. I looked at how she smiled, how her eyes sparkled and her skin
glowed. She was beautiful and pure, dressed in white like a fairy tale
princess. There she was with her new husband, and there with her
parents, and with her bridesmaids. So happy, so radiant and bright with
promise.

I went to the closet and found that dress. It was wrapped in plastic,
in a pale grey garment bag and I threw it on the bed, unzipping it and
smelling it, pulling the soft satin and silk to me face. I covered my
body with it like a blanket, wrapping it around me. I curled up, crying
again finally, alone in that big bed with nothing but someone else's
memories to comfort me.

It was no comfort at all.

"Lisa?" I'd been dreaming, perhaps I still was. "Hey, taking a
little nap?"

My husband's voice was soft and his touch was gentle. He was waking
me up, bringing me back and for just a second I forgot everything. I
was just sleeping on our bed and he was home from work. It was normal
and okay and I almost smiled the way I do when he finds me like that,
unguarded and innocent. But then I felt the dress I was still wrapped
up in, clutching it to my breasts. And there in front of me the album,
laying on our bed. I stared at it, feeling the doctor still in my womb.

"I'm sorry." I said, before I could stop myself. It was all
coming out and there was nothing for it. "I'm so sorry, Jack." I
looked at him, his handsome features becoming puzzled as he tried to
understand what I was saying.

"Sorry for what?" He smiled. "It's your dress. I sorta like
it."

His hands were moving over me and he leaned down kissing me in the soft
light of the setting sun streaming through the windows. He was moving,
getting on the bed with me, lying on his side in his clothes and
holding me. Our faces were close and I was afraid to see his eyes.

"Have you been crying?" He brought a hand to my face, running his
thumb across my cheek. "What's wrong? What happened?"

I was crying again, burying my face away from him, covering myself with
that wedding dress and wishing he would leave me alone. He shouldn't
have been there, he shouldn't have been touching me, or kissing me. I
could feel his lips on the top of my head as he hugged me, shushing me
and rocking me slightly like a little girl.

"Just tell me, what happened?" He was worried now and I wanted to
tell him so badly, but I couldn't. I couldn't make my lips form the
words and even if I could, there was no breath in my body. I couldn't
breathe, my heart was stopped, or going to fast, or something. It hurt
and it was breaking, I knew. I'd broken my own heart and how could I
break his as well? I was dying.

We didn't say anything for a long time, neither of us, and I'd
stopped crying. Not because I wanted to, but I'd just run out of
tears. There wasn't anything left in me but pain and it wasn't
enough, not yet. I'd hurt Jack, I knew, I'd hurt him and it would
end finally. I'd take it and hold it and leave with our pain growing
in my belly, I could do that much, I thought. If nothing else, I could
give him the satisfaction of watching me leave.

"I cheated on you." I said softly, beneath my snow white shroud.
"Today, with another man."

"What?" He asked and his voice was soft, not angry or even
disbelieving. It was like he hadn't heard me correctly, that's all.

"I went to a clinic." I told him and I felt a curious calm. My skin
seemed to cool, and I could breathe. I felt detached, like someone else
was speaking for me.

"A clinic? Why?" Jack cleared his throat a little.

"I wanted to find out about..." I did need a breath there, just a
small one. "...about castrating you."

"You can't be serious." My husband said, almost laughing like
this must be a joke. But my tears had been real enough, and they lent
an undeniable credence to my words.

"I thought we'd be happy and I met a man, a doctor." I shivered,
just a little and my husband lifted his hand from my back. "He had
sex with me. He..." I had my eyes closed, but I could feel my husband
pulling the dress away from my face. "He came inside me. I let
him."

"You let him?" Jack's voice was growing louder. "Look at
me...You let him? What does that mean, Lisa? Look at me!"

I opened my eyes and he was there, sitting up above me, staring at me
in the growing darkness. I had nothing else to say really, I'd told
him everything he needed to know. I was just waiting now. Maybe he'd
hit me, or more likely just tell me to leave. Or he might leave
himself, I didn't know. Whatever he did, I'd accept it. I had no
choice, I loved him.

"You want to cut off my balls?" He demanded, searching my face for
an answer. "Is that what you want?"

"I...I don't know." I whispered. "No...I don't, I just..."

"Fuck." He snorted, turning his head away. "And you let this guy
fuck you, I see. You cut my nuts and fuck this guy, is that the plan?
You bitch."

He got up, walking away, leaving me there.

"I'm sorry." I said, but I don't think he could hear me. I'd
barely heard it myself.

I got up once to use the bathroom, but otherwise I didn't move at all
and as soon as I'd finished I returned to the bed, curling up under
my dress. I was waiting, that was all I could do. I'd heard my
husband downstairs, in the kitchen, and in the living room, turning on
the television and turning it off a minute later.

And it was quiet too, for a long time I could hear nothing but my own
breathing. The lights were off, everywhere, there wasn't even the
soft glow from a light downstairs. Jack was sitting in the dark, I
knew, thinking about me. I wondered if he would drink, or might even be
drunk already. He wasn't much for alcohol, but we had some bottles
from last new years in the cabinet. He wouldn't though, I was sure.
It would be the furthest thing from his mind, like hitting me. It
hadn't occurred to him, no matter how angry or disappointed he might
have been, he wasn't built that way.

The LED's on my husband's alarm clock had just clicked over to 1:08
when he came in. All I could see was his outline, like a shadow in the
darkness. The only light came from a streetlamp outside and it cast the
room with shades of grey.

He was on the bed and his hands were neither gentle nor rough, but
insistent and strong. He was turning me, pulling the dress away from my
legs and hips, pulling and pushing me to my knees.

"Jack, I..."

"Shut-up." He said, and it was an angry quiet sound like I'd
never heard from him before. "Don't say a fucking word. You wanna
fuck, we'll do it this way from now on. You don't, then after I'm
done get your stuff and call a taxi."

That was all the explanation he was giving me and then I felt him
ripped my panties, slapping at my thighs in the darkness. I gasped and
cringed and shivered at the sensations. I felt blindfolded somehow as I
tried to lift my head only to have my husband push my face back down
into the mattress.

My heart was going again, confusion and excitement filling my head. I
didn't know what he was doing, or perhaps I did, but it was so
unexpected. Was he trying to prove himself to me? Was that was this was
about? He was mad that another man had put his penis inside me, so now
my husband had to reassert his claim? I wasn't fighting it, not at
all, if anything I was ready for it. My body warming quickly, my sex
coming to life as I realized my husband wanted me. If only for that
moment, for reasons of jealousy and anger, rather than love, he wanted
me still.

I wanted him as well, more than anything else in the world. I'd give
myself to him, do whatever he asked. I wanted him to take me and the
one real hope I entertained was that I hadn't gotten pregnant that
afternoon, that Prescott was sterile, or his sperm weak, or my womb
just not quite exactly ready. Please God, I prayed, let my husband make
me pregnant. I wouldn't know whose baby it was, and maybe I never
would, but if I found out in a week or a month that I was pregnant,
then there was that chance that it was Jack's. That was my
redemption, I thought, my only hope at salvation.

I held my breath, spreading my thighs as I knelt there, feeling my
husband's cock, as hard and swollen as it had ever been, rubbing
across my slit. I moaned softly, pushing myself back, aching to feel
him inside me, but he pulled away, teasing me, I thought.

"You want it, huh?" He was breathing hard. "Well, I'm not
putting my dick in that dirty hole..." I started lifting my head as I
felt his pressing his cock against my anus, "...So this one will have
to do from now on...Ugggh!..."

He pushed his cock inside me hard, grabbing hops and pulling me back so
that I screamed with pain as my asshole was suddenly split open by his
penis. It was a blunt searing pain that spread through me like a fire
and I was confused by it, all my previous thoughts and hopes and dreams
shattered suddenly.

"Nooo...Ahhh...P-Please..." I was whispering, my voice muffled
against the mattress as Jack shoved me back down. I felt sick and
frightened, the pain was terrible, but the humiliation was even worse.
He was in my ass, in the dirtiest, most private part of me because it
was cleaner than my vagina now. I sobbed with a sudden and pathetic
loathing for myself.

"Uhhh yeah...You whore...How's that? Pretty...Ugh!...Good now? You
like...Uhhhg...That?" He was fucking my ass as hard as he could,
tearing into my delicate flesh. It was an act of rape, for all of its
uncaring violence and dominant desire, nothing else. I was being
punished with a corruption of our lovemaking, just as I'd corrupted
our marriage.

I was crying out and jerking my body as if I might get away, but he
pinned me down easily and in truth I wasn't fighting him at all, just
the awful knowledge that I'd never have his child now. If I was
pregnant, it would be Dr. Prescott's and his alone, my husband was
keeping me, but he wasn't going to save me. Not this night, or for
many more to come I imagined, but I was free to leave. As soon as
he'd fucked me one last time, left me with a painful and humiliating
reminder of what I'd been so concerned with that I'd let it ruin my
marriage and my life. I could go or stay.

My husband fucked my ass for many long minutes before he finally came.
I was weeping still, and my cries were soft and punctuated his
deliberate thrusts. I was limp and exhausted however, and he took me as
he liked until Jack told me he was going to cum and then did so,
burying his penis as far into my torn rectum as he could and flooding
my useless bowels with his sperm.

Jack collapsed on top of me, his body pressing mine flat to the bed
while he caught his breath. "I'm sorry..." I whispered and his
face was so close to mine he must have heard me, but he said nothing.

A few minutes later he was getting up, pulling his cock from my ass
slowly and it was a different sort of ache. My rectum felt mushy and
loose, filled with grease or oil maybe, almost like I needed to use the
bathroom, but I didn't. I didn't move at all, I just watched my
husband's dark form as he wiped his penis clean on my wedding dress
and left the room, leaving the door wide open in case I wanted to
leave.

But I just curled up again, hugging my knees to my breasts and feeling
Jack's sperm leaking slowly from my stretched anus. I couldn't
leave him. I respected him too much for that.

end Chapter 1

-- 
Pursuant to the Berne Convention, this work is copyright with all rights
reserved by its author unless explicitly indicated.
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