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From: "Mr Slot" <slot.mr@gmail.com>
Subject: {ASSM} Self Esteem (MF oral) by Mr Slot
Lines: 280
Date: Sun, 19 Feb 2006 02:10:03 -0500
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<1st attachment, "Self Esteem.doc" begin>

Self Esteem.
(MF, oral)

The following is a work of fiction consisting of adult concepts
and possibly sex.  Do not read if you are not legally permitted.
I don't want the police on my front doorstep.  
You are welcome to read this story but please don't distribute
without my permission.  Feel free to make any comments to the
author.  

Send E-Mail to slot.mr@gmail.com

A short story based on the lyrics to Self Esteem by The
Offspring.

***

"Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck."

I picked up the small glass coffee table I loved so much and
threw it against the wall, smashing the top into a million tiny
shards and bending its aluminium legs into complete disrepair.

"Fuck," I said once more as I surveyed the damage. I really liked
that table. I went into the kitchen and opened the pantry. It was
a mess in there, bit like my life really. Everything looked fine
on the surface, smashed furniture not withstanding, but inside
was a conglomeration of useless clutter that was no good to
anyone.

I reached in and grabbed the dustpan and broom and returned to
the living room. Being careful not to stand in any broken glass I
set about cleaning up the mess. On the wall above the ruin was a
picture of the reason for its demise. My love, my desire, my
ruination.

Sharon. The bitch from hell. The foul temptress of Golgotha.

Sharon. The woman I loved. Madly, deeply, stupidly loved.

The catalyst for the destruction of my favourite coffee table was
the conversation I had just had with her. She told me she
couldn't see me tonight, she was too busy. That I was talking to
her at all was a complete accident, I had rung my friend Geoff
and instead she had answered the phone. I knew what she was doing
at his place, the same thing she had done at Brian's, and
David's, and Clint's. 

Sometimes I thought the only reason I had male friends was so she
didn't have to go far to find guys to fuck.

"No more," I said as I threw the bits of the table into the
rubbish bin. "No more of this shit. From now on I'm living just
for me."

***

That afternoon she came over to apologise.

"I'm sorry, Will," she said. "I don't know what got into me."

"Sounded like Geoff got into you," I said.

"It was a mistake," she said. "Sure he's a great lover and all
and sure he can go all night but it really meant nothing to me.
Tuesday night was the last time."

"Wednesday," I said.

"No, it was Tuesday."

"You were there this morning and today's Thursday so you were
there Wednesday night."

"Oh right," she said. "Tuesday night was Richard."

"You're fucking Rick too?"

"Oops," she said, "I thought you knew."

"Just how many of my friends are you sleeping with?" I asked.

"How many do you know about?"

I sighed and rattled off the ones I knew. "Any more I asked?

"Ian, Fred, Justin and Hank, that's all I swear.

"Fred is married," I said.

"Yeah I know but Betty joins in so I guess she's cool with it."

I shook my head in disbelief. "You're sleeping with every one of
my friends except for John?

"Well that's something isn't it?"

"I guess," I said. Hell, she could have lopped off my legs and
told me at least I didn't have to worry about buying shoes now
and I would have heartily agreed. Stupid, spineless waste of...

"I mean blowjobs don't count as sex so yeah, every one except for
John."

"You've given John a blowjob?"

"Well it's more like fifteen but who's counting?"

"Fifteen?" I sighed and sunk down onto the couch.

"I'm sorry, babe," she said as she sat down next to me. "But he
really loves the way I do it."

"I like the way you do it too you know." I didn't really,
Sharon's blow jobs were usually just her way of saying "Hurry up
and get hard so you can get me off." I don't know what John got
out of it, but then she probably did it differently with him.

"Aw, that's so sweet," she said and patted me on the head. She
probably expected me to fetch her paper and slippers then curl up
at her feet while she read.

The sad thing is I'd probably do that if she asked me too.

"Let me make it up to you," she continued, "let's go out for
dinner Friday night."

"Where?" I asked.

"Anywhere you like. Then we can come back here and you can do
that thing you've been asking me about." She rubbed my shoulder
and gave me a smile. It almost looked genuine.

"Do you mean..."

"Yup, I'll let you do me in the arse," she said.

"And it will be the first time for you?" I asked.

"Yeah, sure." She could have tried to be a little more
convincing.

"I'll be over at eight on Friday," she said. She leaned over and
kissed me then hopped up and flounced over to the door in a way
that made my heart melt. "Make sure you're ready, Stud." She went
out leaving the door open behind her. It wasn't in her nature to
close doors, or clean up after herself. There was always some
poor mug to do it for her.

I got up and closed the door.

***

On Friday I showered, shaved and was ready by fifteen minutes to
eight, just in case. 

I was still ready at eight-thirty. 

By ten I was starting to waver. 

At midnight I began to doubt she was coming. 

At two I turned out the light and went to bed.

***

I woke to find someone sitting at the end of my bed.

"Sharon?"

"Hey stud," she slurred. Obviously she was drunk, as usual. I
knew what was coming next.

"Wanna fuck?"

"Sharon, it's..." I rolled over to see the time on my bedside
clock. "Jesus, Sharon it's four in the morning."

"I'll take that as a yes then shall I?" she said and proceeded to
get undressed.

"Please," I protested as she took off my pants. I guess I could
have tried harder to stop her but it's kinda hard when she's
ready to go. 

'I swear to God,' I thought as she took me into her mouth, 'in
the morning I'm breaking up with her.' 

Yeah, right.

I sighed as she quit her half-hearted attempt at head and climbed
on top of me. 

***

"Where were you last night?" I asked as I made her bacon and eggs
for breakfast.

"Nowhere, Hon," she replied. I placed her plate in front of her
and she dug in.

"You said you were coming over at eight."

"Oh yeah, that's right," she said around a mouthful of bacon.

"So where were you?"

"Well I was coming over here to see you."

"Uh huh."

"And there was this guy on the bus."

"Uh huh."

"I think his name was Eric, or Shane..." She paused for a second,
lost in thought. "Oh hell, you know I've never been good with
names, Will"

Considering my name was actually Bill I had no problem at all
believing that. I had long given up on correcting her about my
true identity.

"Anyway he was really cute and he seemed like a really nice guy
so we..."

"Uh huh." I wasn't really listening any more, just nodding in the
usual places. She met blah blah on a bus and went back to his
place. They blah blahed and he stuck his blah into her blah and
blah blah blah.

"Will? Are you listening to me?"

"Yeah, sure," I said.

"What the hell is wrong with you, Will?" she demanded.

"Nothing, I'm fine. I enjoy hearing about all your sexual
conquests, it really brightens up my morning."

"Are you trying to be sarcastic?"

"Well duh," I said.

"Honestly, Will, you're like a disease at times, you suck all the
fun out of life. I don't know why I put up with you."

"Me either."

"Look, I gotta go," she said as she grabbed the last bites of
breakfast. "Can you loan me a few bucks?"

"How much?" I sighed and reached for my wallet.

"A couple of hundred will be fine."

I pulled a handful of fifties out and handed them to her. "Here,"
I said.

"Thanks, hon," she said and kissed me on the lips as she took the
cash. As she made for the door she turned back to me and said,
"You're cute babe, but you're such a dweeb."

I watched her go and muttered to myself, "I'm not a dweeb, I'm
just a sucker with no self esteem."


Mr Slot.

<1st attachment end>


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