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From: john lubber <batcum2002@yahoo.com>
X-ASSTR-Original-Date: Sun, 17 Aug 2003 09:29:29 -0700 (PDT)
Subject: {ASSM} Glorious Death (snuff)
X-Original-Subject: Please accept my story
Date: Sun, 17 Aug 2003 20:10:02 -0400
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I hope you enjoy this snuff type story.
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<1st attachment, "Glorious Death.txt" begin>
Glorious Death
I was ready and looking forward to taking my life. I had
looked long and far for an appropriate method and time to exit
this life. After many months, I had chosen a time, place and
method that seemed to satisfy my desire for a glorious event. I
didn't want too much pain or too much blood and I didn't want it
to take too long after the actual act. Just a few days before
the main event was to take place, I found a message in a
newsgroups for those individuals like me that thought suicide
should be glorious and spectacular, not hushed and shrouded in
darkness.
I had been conversing with a few other people over the months
looking for someone who might witness, but not assist in my
demise. Gerald was on of these acquaintances. He asked if I was
really at the final point and ready to die. I had convinced him
that I was totally serious and committed to snuff out my life,
but in a spectacular way. We had also discussed the connection
of sex and suicide. Anyone who has read "Patriotism" by Mishima
will understand what we mean.
I decided to meet Gerald at a bar and we immediately hit it
off and had a lot in common. We were both ready to end our
lives, but didn't want to just go out with a breeze. We both
longed for a more exotic exit where people could see and enjoy
our death. As we talked, I was amazed to find out there were
people who would pay thousands of dollars to watch willing men
and women commit suicide.
He had heard of a small Caribbean island where there was a
private continuous suicide cult that maintained its existence by
recruiting new members to replace those who died and by selling
the films of the deaths to very rich and secretive clubs and
individuals. I was fascinated. Gerald only stumbled on the
group at an underground club in NYC where a snuff film was being
shown. He said it looked so real and asked about it. The owner
didn't want to talk, but said he had access to many more for the
right price. We got some money together and bought one. I had
always fantasized about being the star of a dark horror snuff
film.
I went over to Gerald's apartment the next weekend and
watched in amazement as a dozen, mostly 20 something men and
women, committed suicide in front of a crowd of people. Everyone
in the film was nude and they were smiling throughout the film.
The biggest smiles were from the participants. There were at
least 6 different methods of death and all were the type of death
I and others longed for. There was always a man and woman on
stage and they always engaged in some sort of sex act before
taking their places in the various death devices or simply doing
themselve in. After watching this video, I was incredibly
stimulated in every way. It was all I could have ever dreamed of
for a final exit. Gerald was almost in a trance and equally
filled with desire. Another friend of his had seen the video. A
girl, Julie, he had met at a goth club. She passed out during
the movie, but when she awoke, she said she'd had the best orgasm
of her life.
We all got together at a coffee shop and discussed what we'd
seen. After and hour or so, we made a pact to go ahead. Julie
and I seemed more into it than Gerald. We were all going to meet
a man in Miami in two weeks who would hook us up with the people
who would actually take us to the island. I settled my affairs
as did the others. We flew to Miami and checked in at a crappy
motel where our contact was to meet us. At about 2 am, he
knocked on our door. As we opened it, he told us to each face
the wall while he frisked us for a wire or other device. They
were desperately afraid of the police and had to be careful. We
sat on the bed as he asked us some preliminary questions.
As we were each quizzed on our desire to die, Gerald began to
realize the reality of what we were doing. The man held out
three syringes and said we had to each self inject and that 1 in
100 of the syringes had a lethal dose of drugs. The other 99
were saline solution. This was our first test to see if we were
serious. I had been ready for months and grabbed my syringe. I
stuck it in my arm and pushed the plunger. It felt warm as
Gerald and Julie watched for a reaction. After a few minutes, I
felt nothing. Now Julie did hers. Again, nothing. Gerald
looked at the syringe and looked at Julie and me. He then got up
and left. We never saw him again. I knew somehow he wasn't
really into death. The man laughed and said that the weeding
process would go one more step once we got to the island. He
said to get some sleep and that we would leave in the morning.
Julie and I got up and had a nice breakfast and really began
to talk about our lives and death. Neither of us had any close
family or relationships and simply wanted to look in the next
life for happiness. We met up with Jim and took a cab to a
boatyard. The boat was medium sized, but very nice and
comfortable. As we headed out to sea, I realized that this was
real and I'd never see my old life again. It was my death that
approached. My goal was to go out with style, with someone I
knew and with a violent finale.
After two hours, we spotted and island. It wasn't very big
and there was a large house and what looked like an amphitheater
carved out of the thick palm grove. This was like something out
of a movie and it soon would be incredibly real for us. As we
landed, two men dressed in black robes led us to the main house.
We couldn't see their faces. As we walked in, Jim said we must
undergo one more test or we'd be taken back immediately on the
boat. We jumped as a shot rang out from a room down the hall.
The robed men walked us in that direction and opened the door.
There was a chair under a light and a man standing holding a
handgun. I was pushed in and the door closed behind me. There
was blood all over the floor. I noticed a camera focused on the
chair.
Only one word was said. "Sit".
The man handed me the gun and said that there was a one in 20
chance I would die during this test and if for any reason I could
not go through with it, I should leave. He didn't know who he
was dealing with. A simple gunshot to the head was nothing
compared with what I'd seen in the video. I pointed the muzzle
at just under my ear pointing up and pulled the trigger. I
smiled at him as there was only a click.
I was escorted out and congratulated on passing the final
test. After few minutes, Julie followed me. We were then told
that neither the syringe or gun was ever loaded and that it was
only a test to make sure we were suitable for the island. In
this business, they could not afford fakers. At this point we
were told to shed our clothes for the final journey and that we
would remain naked until called for the ultimate show. We were
led to two different homes. One was large and the other small.
The larger was for the new arrivals which was most of us. The
smaller was for the two people chosen each Saturday plus the
additional four. From the Saturday group of six, two would be
chosen on Sundays at 7:30 for an 8:00pm death
Everyone was walking around naked and smiling and happy. We
were welcomed to the group of about 24 people, mostly in their
20s and 30s and easy on the eyes. This was no accident. The
people paying for the films demand quality and an extreme sexual
element to the films. I know I have always connected sex and
death. Julie feels the same way. We were encouraged to engage
in any sexual act with anyone we wanted during our time before
being chosen. Once our name came up for the finale, we could not
have sex until being led on stage. It was encouraged, but
optional.
It was almost noon and everyone was gathering in the open
theater for lunch and to learn who was going to be chosen as part
of the next six. I was hard at the thought and wished I was
eligible now, but you had to wait for two weeks before your name
went into the hat. Then, you could be chosen right away or
almost any length of time later. Two names were chosen every
Saturday out of the eligible group. A man and woman were always
teamed up to die, but there were always six people in the house,
so you never were quite sure of who would go next. This
uncertainty racheted up the excitement and desire among
everyone. It also gave everyone a wonderful bond that was
somehow different than the newcomers.
Of course, when the lucky couple was finally chosen, their
bond was strongest of all. At precisely noon, a bell rang and
we all sat. Two gold bowls sat on a table with names of women in
one and men in the other. You could tell who's names were in the
bowls by the faces in the crowd. I longed for that feeling. A
hooded man pulled out a woman's name and read it. Angeline was
her name and she screamed and fainted. The name Robert was next
called. He just stood up and smiled. We all ate lunch and
talked about our lives and coming death.
Saturday night was routine with some drinking, sex, talk etc.
I fell asleep and then it was Sunday. I was all tied up with
anticipation of the evening. I had never witnessed an actual live
death and couldn't wait. Julie and I talked and began to make
the final decisions on how we wanted to die when our time came.
We were all told to decide early and dream and look forward to
our chosen method. Our method of death was to be an obsession
and studied and talked about endlessly. As we watched others die
that way, we would become incredibly attached to that method and
grow to lust for it. It would become our final death wish.
Julie quickly grabbed onto hanging as a final out. I was
torn between beheading and the knife machine. In the beheading,
I would climb into a guillotine which would be sideways to the
audience and lower my head onto the semicircle. The other death
mate would close the top over my head and lock me in. In this
way, no one could be prosecuted. She would hand me the rope
controlling the blade. I would decide when and just smile at the
audience until ready.
The Knife machine was a large table where i would lay on my
back with a large heavy block of concrete suspended 10 feet
above me. It would be littered with knives of varying lengths
and when released, would slowly, but unstoppably drop and pierce
my body from waist to neck. The average time from the first
point of a knife touching my chest untill full penetration was
said to be 2 minutes. The idea was that I might live for a few
moments and the audience could watch my reaction and enjoy my
death. I really liked the idea of this. Not too painful and not
too quick. I wanted to be aware of my death and savor it. I
wanted some pain to make it real and be a true death journey not
just and explosion with no conscious memory of the event.
Julie, typical of a woman, wanted no real pain and/or mess,
just a quick out. She did confess to hoping her head would be
snapped off to give any future viewers a treat.
It was now Sunday evening and we all gathered for the main
event. I couldn't wait. Precisely at 8pm, a guillotine was
rolled out and as was a single head knife machine. This was
similar to the total body knife machine, but that the recipient
would be locked into place as a single long blade would quickly
be thrust into his head from directly above and decsending well
into the neck. They say you feel nothing, but cold as the blood
bubbles up around the knife and over your face till you lose
consciousness. I was intrigued. The other possible methods were
more freestyle where the chosen would sit or stand and commit a
more traditional suicide. A gunshot to the head or heart., true
hari kari and slashing your own throat. I personally like to see
some blood to make it real. If you chose the freestyle method,
there was required training which was extensive. They didn't
want anyone else to get hurt or for you to simply injure
yourself. In addition, for these total control methods, various
drugs were offered for relaxation and loss of inhibition. Most
people chose the pull of a lever method because of its definite
and reliable result. I did hear of a few accidents where death
took hours. I guess the video editing department could trim it
down to size for the final film.
A nice looking man, Vince, and an equally attractive woman,
Susan, took the stage and casually examined their death machines.
Susan had chosen the guillotine and Vince had selected the more
diabolical knife death. They enjoyed a sweet nude embrace. He
was obviously erect and totally into this moment. Suddenly, Sue
went to her knees and began to furiously suck his rock hard cock
to the cheers of the crowd. She stood up smacked her lips and
got into position in the head chopper. Vince placed the top
piece in place to lock her into position with her head laying
back on a satin covered pillow. She turned her head and smiled
joyously at the audience. She began to masturbate and get her
body ready to die. Vince was able to lock himself into the knife
machine to make his head and torso immobile. A black robed
assistant handed Sue a rope and one for Vince. They each pulled
them taught for a clean beautiful death. There had been a coin
toss early in the day and Vince wanted to go first and be in the
middle of his journey and watch as Susie pull the rope for her
own sweet, but instantaneous death.
It was time. Vince was gently fisting his cock with one hand
while making a few false tugs on the rope. As he neared climax,
he pulled on the rope and the weighted knife pierced his head
with a whack. There was no blood and he continued to gently
fist his cock. A strange look came over his face as the first
blood spurt out of the top of his head and ran down his face. He
licked at it and savored the taste. Just then, as all eyes were
on Vince, Susie pulled the cord. Everyone's eyes shifted like a
tennis match as the blade quickly severed her head. Her body
flinched and moved violently as her head fell to the floor with
her face looking at all of us. She mouthed something and still
had a smile on her face as her eyes closed and her body went
limp. Vince also mouthed something unintelligible and smiled as
he lost consciousness.
This was very bloody. Susie's body poured blood all over the
stage and Vince was soaked in his own sweet red blood. Many in
the crowd had seen this over and over again, but they were still
mesmerized by these violent deaths, all the time knowing that our
time would come. It was the waiting that drove me crazy. I
wanted to do it now. I wanted to kill myself.
As the weeks went by, the scene was repeated again and
again. Julie and I were only one day away from being eligible.
We were so ready to kill ourselves for anyone who wanted to
watch. As noon on Saturday approached, I grew restless. My
heart was pounding. There were six names and Julie and I were
two of them. We had chosen to die as a couple, but there was no
guarantee we'd be chosen on the first time. Finally, the time
had come and the names were read. When he said,"Julie and Dan,"
I was ecstatic.
Of course, this was no guarantee we would die on Sunday, only
that we would join the four left from the previous week. We
still had to pass the draw against two other couples. That would
be held in private in the death cottage just before the event.
The rest of the crowd would not know who was to die until we
walked onto the stage on Sunday.
We ate lunch and moved into the small death cottage. It was
elegant with anything we wanted to drink or eat available. The
drug ecstasy was offered if we wanted. I had used this many
times during long auto erotic episodes, but I wanted to be
completely sober for my exit. Julie and I flipped a coin and she
won. Since she was going to be hanged, she wanted to see me
impaled first and gaze upon my dying flesh and then return the
favor and pull her own rope so that I would see her die before I
lost consciousness. I loved her for it. As Saturday evening
passed along, we made love on the stage where we would die the
next evening. A few others watched us and were envious of our
deep feeling of love, lust and our beautiful death wish.
As Sunday morning and afternoon passed, I became serenely
content in my life and my decisions. My only regret was that I
would not get to see the video of my death. At least I knew I
would be coherent through the first few moments and enjoy the
sweet pain and wetness of my own blood. Julie would only have a
second until the length of rope ran out and her neck snapped. If
she was lucky, she might be conscious to feel something and enjoy
her own death. When the time came for the two finalists to be
chosen, Julie and I were sweating and nervous. It wasn't to be
our night. Joe and Denise were given the nod and since it was
7:30, there was little time to prepare or be sad that we'd have
to wait another week, at least.
Denise and Joe were free spirits. They had chosen to be in
total control of their bodies. Joe had decided to slit his own
throat and Denise was going to rip her abdomen wide open, hari
kari style. Both of these were horrific, bloody and boldly
erotic. There are few souls with the fortitude to die like this.
They had each been given extensive training in the use of a
special knife and exactly where and how deeply to cut. Denise's
death would be slow so she wanted to go first so that Joe could
enjoy the view of her gutted and bleeding to death as he raked
his own knife through his carotid artery and jugular vein.
They were marched up on stage where Denise quickly sat on a
silk rug and Joe sat in a chair next to her. The knives were
carefully presented to each of them with a ceremonial bow.
Without so much as a word, Denise held the knife up for all to
see and then placed it against her left abdomen. She was going
to cut left to right and then up a few inches allowing her bowels
to spill out in front of her. Joe placed his own knife on the
designated spot on his neck and tightened his grip. Denise
looked over at him and plunged the knife into her belly. She was
in obvious pain and took a minute to compose herself for the main
cut. Blood was spilling out as she used a death clutch and
ripped the knife across her body and then turned it up a few
inches.. She screamed and let go. It seemed as if her entire
insides spilled out onto her lap as she looked out into the
audience for approval. It might take an hour for her to die. As
the waves of pain tore through her, she looked over at Joe.
Joe's knife had already pierced his neck as he watched
Denise. With one wonderful movement, he cut deep into his neck
hitting both vein and artery. The blood shot from his neck as he
dropped the knife and put his hands on his knees and looked over
at Denise. They were both bleeding profusely. Joe quickly lost
consciousness and fell on the floor still pouring blood from his
neck. Denise grabbed Joe's knife and quickly cut a gaping hole
in her own neck to hasten her death. There was so much blood.
She also lost consciousness and fell forward into her entrails
and the pool of blood. It was over and incredible.
The audience was silent the entire time. There had never
been two more violent deaths at the island. So few people chose
the old methods these days. We walked back to our cottage, the
four of us who were left and talked about what we'd seen. Who
would be next?
The next week was endless. I couldn't wait for Sunday. We
didn't care who the next couple was to join us. We just wanted
to die.
It was Sunday evening and the drawing was now here and we
were ready to snuff out our lives. Who would it be? Finally,
the attendant read out the names. We won. This was a million
times more intense than the best sex of my life. The drawing was
only minutes before the robed men would come for us. I kissed
Julie and hugged her one last time.
At 7:30 the robed attendants came for us. Julie had
exaggerated her makeup and we held hands as we made our way to
the stage. I could see my machine. Oddly, over the time I
watched others die, no one used this method. I do like surprises,
not knowing what to expect. It is always the fantasy we love and
anticpate that excites us the most. More often than not, the
fulfilled fantasy is anticlimatic. I couldn't wait, but then I
wouldn't have to worry about my feelings or a possible letdown
afterwards.
Julie hugged the hangman's machine like it was a man she
loved. I stood up on the table and tried to feel the sharpness
of the knives that would hang over me and later snuff out my
life. They were sharp. Just imagining these two dozen knives
slowly impaling my torso was more than I could stand. I would
actually get to slowly see my body being opened for all to see.
I was told the pain was only moderate because of the force of the
weight on the knives and their sharpness. My heart might be
pierced or not. There was no guarantee. Without a heart wound,
I might live for 30 minutes until my lungs filled with blood.
With a good heart wound, it might take only a few.
Julie, on the other hand, would go instantly. There have
been some cases where the neck does not break and asphyxiation is
the cause of death. Julie didn't care. She just wanted everyone
to enjoy her death and feel that one second of pain.
I wanted to have one final orgasm before I died. Julie
engulfed my shaft one final time and then kissed me before she
walked up to the gallows and put the noose around her neck with
the knot to the side. There was no hood. That was the point of
this entire cult. Death should be joyful and celebrated. A
marvelous death would be enjoyed by the particpants and witnesses
alike.
I laid myself down on the table and began to fondle myself
to an incredible hardness. The attendant handed me the rope
which I pulled taught with my free hand. The other attendant
handed Julie her rope. I was so damn hot and ready to die. As I
was to go first so that Julie could watch, I looked up at her and
tugged at the rope. The slab of concrete quickly came down to my
chest and the longest knife sliced into my abdomen. At first I
thought it might be too quick, but as the slab slowed, I
remembered that it would take two minutes to push every knife
into my body.
As each knife pierced my flesh, I looked up at Julie and we
both smiled. I was feeling only mild pain, but a lot of pressure
as some of the knives pressed against my ribs and sternum. Julie
didn't know how long I'd be able to stay conscious, so she pulled
on the rope. Her sweet nude body fell through the trap door and
stopped with a violent jolt. Her breasts heaved and her legs
tensed up as her neck snapped. Her body was immediately
lifeless, but swaying back and forth like a tree from the wind.
Her smile never left her face. She was dead and her last view
was of me slowly dying.
I was now in much more pain and a few of the knives were deep
into my body. Some had scraped across my ribs. I looked at the
audience and they seemed amazed at my lack of emotion. I felt
strange, but not like I was within minutes of death. The slab
seemed to slow and my blood was indeed filling my lungs now.
They ached as I tried to breath. I coughed and the pain was
intense. I coughed up an incredible amount of blood. I could
feel it leaking down my sides and under my back. It was warm and
wonderful. Suddenly, I felt something quite strange. My heart
was on fire. I could feel every blade in my body. My heart
pounded like a deep drum. I could not breath and couldn't move my
torso. My eyes were open, but I couldn't move them. I looked up
at the cold concrete. The slab had now stopped and I was totally
impaled. I tried to remain conscious. I wanted to see my
ultimate, glorious
death..................................................I could
see the light............It
was......................................
EPILOGUE: We still don't know much about the moment of death
or what happens to the soul, the spirit or the essence of our
mind. There is physical pain and happiness with birth. The same
can be said for death. As death approaches in those final
minutes, there is a calm as if we know that what lies ahead is
not bad or evil, but simply a new chapter. This island is real.
It's existence is the most highly guarded secret of the dark
underground world we all secretly covet. Death is part of life.
Who's to say what happens after?
<1st attachment end>
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