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From: J R D <jrdss@pobox.alaska.net>
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Subject: {ASSM} Bad Wishing:The Singer
Date: Mon, 10 Dec 2001 01:10:04 -0500
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Newsgroups: alt.sex.stories.moderated,alt.sex.stories
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Had to get a new email, so I'm reposting my old works under the new 
addy to get it out.

Another Patty story.  This time, Patty explains the rules he must 
obey in regards to granting wishes.  There's also a cameo from a 
previous wisher.

Now, onto the boring stuff

-------------------------

DISCLAIMERS

-------------------------

This story contains scenes of an erotic and/or controversial nature, 
and is not intended for the perusal of minors.  Further if perusal of 
such material is considered illegal in your area or immoral by your 
religion or personal beliefs, you should likewise bypass this story.

This story remains the property of the author.  Permission is granted 
to download, photocopy, copy and repost so long as any such action 
contains these disclaimers, and no attempt is made to profit from 
this story.

All characters in this story are the creation of the author, and any 
resemblance to real persons, alive or dead, are purely coincidental.

This story may contain aspects of fantastic science or magic.  The 
parameters of what this science/magic can accomplish are completely 
at the discretion of me, the author, and, as such, I make no 
apologies for any rules of "real" physics, chemistry, biology, or 
magic that may be broken within the story.

-------------------------

Now onto the fun stuff

-------------------------

BAD WISHING 8:THE SINGER

It started with a trip to my cousin's, although I need to explain a 
little about my background.  I'm the lead singer in an all girl band. 
Well, now I'm the co-lead, but that's getting ahead of the story. 
Originally, it wasn't planned to be all-girl.  My husband and I met 
in choir back when I was in seventh grade, and immediately hooked up, 
first as fellow singers, then as boyfriend and girlfriend.  Pretty 
much from the first day we were together, we talked about how we 
wanted to be singers in a rock band.

But then, when we were in 9th grade, Timmy, my husband, made a 
stupid, STUPID mistake.  He started smoking.  He quit only three 
years later in our senior year, but by then the damage had been done. 
He had lost his singing voice.  For good, we thought.

In college, we started looking for a band.  Timmy may not have been 
able to sing anymore, but he knew the business, and was taking the 
classes to know more, so he became the manager.  We didn't intend it 
to be an all-girl band when we did the auditions, it just worked out 
that way.  Our band was Erin, the keyboardist, Julie on base guitar, 
and Diane on drums, with me, Dana once O'Malley now Abbott playing 
guitar and singing vocals.  We cut a demo and Timmy took it to a 
producer.  He was interested and asked us all in.

Then we made a mistake.  You see, other than being all women, we had 
something else in common.  We were all incredibly well-endowed. 
Julie's our smallest at a D cup, Diane is a sizable E, I'm a whopping 
F, and Erin is, was, our largest at G, and it's all natural.  Our 
mistake was that we let the producer bill our publicity on that.  He 
told us that by using our breast size, we'd be able to get a firm 
foot hold on male listeners, particularly the 13-19 demographic. 
Hence, "D Plus" was born.  "Starting at D and going up from there," 
was what our publicity was based on.

Timmy didn't like it.  He thought if we based ourselves on our boobs, 
we'd wind up working twice as hard to prove ourselves.  Timmy was 
right.  Damn it, our music is good, but the critics (particularly the 
women) treated us like we were 4 little sex kittens doing a soft core 
porn show for our fans.

But that all changed when I stopped in to visit my cousin Maya.  I 
expected to stop in and visit with her and her husband Leo.  Imagine 
my surprise when I found her living with this cutie, this female 
cutie, named Lee Ann.  They had two babies and both were starting to 
bulge with buns in the oven.  I guessed they were both about 4 or 5 
months along.

I asked where Leo was.  Maya got a bit evasive, not answering me, 
before Lee Ann said, "Leo disappeared about the same time that Maya 
got pregnant with our first child."

"So Leo abandoned you for getting pregnant?  I thought he wanted 
children as much as you did."

Maya got a real weird look on her face and said, "Can't be helped 
now.  So how's the music tour going?"

I got the distinct feeling she was changing the subject.  I thought 
just because she didn't like talking about it.  "It's great.  Still 
having a tough time with the press, though."

"And how is Tim?"

"Fine."

I guess I was a little melancholy, because she asked, "What's wrong? 
You two fighting?"

"No.  Nothing like that.  It's just Timmy's a great manager, but he 
hurts being around us.  He wants to sing with us, I know he does, but 
with the damage his smoking caused to his vocal cords, it'll never 
happen."

"Never?"

"Not without a miracle of modern medicine."

The Lee Ann said, "Or maybe magic."

I looked at her.  From the look on her face, I guessed that she was 
probably thinking aloud, so I asked, "What?  Are you some kind of 
witch?"

She smiled.  "No.  But maybe we could get Patty to help."

"Who's Patty?"

Without answering me, Maya said, "Maybe, but how do we get a hold of 
him?  We don't have the coin."

"Who's Patty?"

Lee Ann also ignored me.  "Maybe we could use another coin to call 
him.  At least to get his attention."

"Who's Patty?"

Maya continued, "It couldn't hurt to try."

Before Lee Ann could respond, I yelled, "Who the HELL is Patty?"

Lee Ann smiled and said, "A leprechaun."

Before I could say a thing, Maya said, "You see, Dana, Leo didn't 
abandon me.  A few hundred years ago one of our ancestors helped him 
out and got a wish in repayment.  She was a simple woman and didn't 
want to use it, so Patty gave her a coin to summon him at a later 
date.  The coin was passed from mother to daughter until I got it. 
At the time, Leo and I were having problems getting me pregnant, so I 
held the coin and asked for help, and Patty appeared, explaining all 
this to me.  So I asked that Leo and I could become pregnant whenever 
we wanted."

To say I was doubtful would've been an understatement.  "Uh-huh.  So 
what happened to Leo?"

"Well, Patty is required to grant the wish asked for, not the wish 
intended.  So when I asked that my husband and I could get pregnant," 
Maya got a guilty look and pointed to Lee Ann, "Leo became Lee Ann."

"Uh-huh.  Sure."  I started to rise.  "Storytime's been fun, but-"

Maya pulled me back down and Lee Ann ran into another room.  "We've got proof."

I was doubtful, but willing to wait.  Lee Ann returned a few seconds 
later carrying a dildo.  Maya stood and removed her panties.  I tried 
to leave again, but Maya sat me back down.  She lifted her skirt, 
exposing herself to me.  I blushed and tried to look away, but Maya 
said, "Don't wus out on me now, Dana.  This is the magic part."  I 
faced her as Lee Ann pressed the dildo, the base of the dildo, to her 
vagina.  When Lee Ann removed her hand, the dildo, with no 
restraining device at all, stayed right where it was.  Maya then 
said, "Feel it."

I tried to protest, but Maya just grabbed my hand and put it on her. 
It felt real enough.  Maya said, "Now try to find my slit."

I tried to beg off, but she convinced me to look.  I moved the dick 
and balls around, amazed when I found nothing.  To all appearances, 
she had a dick and it was completely natural.  I said, "Okay, I give 
up.  How'd you hide it?"

"Still don't believe in magic?"

"Nope."

Lee Ann said, "Watch this," and took the dildo in hand.

I looked away, but Maya grabbed my arm.  "You have to watch!  If you 
miss my orgasm, you'll miss the magic!"

I wanted to look away, but she seemed so insistent.  I watched, more 
than a little embarrassed, as Lee Ann masturbated Maya right in front 
of me.  It wasn't much longer (thankfully) until Maya orgasmed.  When 
she did, she actually sprayed out globs of semen.  I thought it was 
some kind of cream or something else similar.  I had heard that there 
were dildoes that could fake spraying stuff.

But the really amazing thing came next.  As soon as Maya finished 
cumming, the dildo disappeared.  Maya's legs, hips, and skirt were 
covered in the semen, but the organ that had just created it was 
gone!  Lee Ann then stood and lifted her skirt.  There, inside her 
panties, was the unmistakable bulge of a hard-on!  Lee Ann pulled her 
panties down, and there was the exact dildo she had just stuck to 
Maya!

I still had trouble believing it.  "How do I know this isn't some 
kind of trick?  Lee Ann could've had a dick all along."

Maya said, "Pull on it."

"I don't-"

"Just to confirm it's real.  You've come this far."

Hard to argue that.  I reached out and tugged a bit on Lee Ann's 
organ.  "Okay.  Seems real enough."  Maya stepped behind Lee, reached 
around, and took her dick in hand.  "Not again," I said as I tried to 
look away.

"Don't wus out now, Dana."  I steeled myself and watched Maya 
masturbate her lover to orgasm.

Once Lee came, the most amazing thing happened.  The dick which, 
seconds ago, I was so sure was real, just popped off in Maya's hand. 
Maya said, "This is... was Leo's dick.  It attaches to either of us, 
becoming a natural appendage until orgasm, whereupon it switches to 
the other."

Part of me wanted to deny it, but the evidence was undeniable.  I 
looked at Lee and asked, "You were Leo?"  She nodded.  "Okay, magic 
is real.  How do we get a hold of this Patty?"

"We don't have the old coin anymore, but maybe if you had another 
gold coin of your own, you could get him to stop in.  You are from 
the same bloodline as Maya."

"It can't hurt to try."  We spent a little while longer making up a 
plan before I left.  Maya walked me to the door.  Just before I left, 
I said, "You know you never struck me as lesbian material."

"Before Lee Ann I wasn't, but I love Leo, no matter his form."  Her 
voice dropped to a whisper.  "Besides, the fun you can have with 
another girl and a detachable dick is unbelievable."  I wasn't sure 
if she was teasing or not, so I just said good-bye.

I went straight to a coin collectors' shop and purchased a solid gold 
Spanish doubloon.  I returned to my hotel room.  Timmy was working on 
some contracts, so I didn't disturb him.  I went into the bedroom, 
held the coin tightly and said, "Patty, if you're out there, I'd like 
to ask for help."  I looked around.  Nothing.  I sighed and said, 
"Didn't work."

Before I could say or do anything, I heard, "Now, lassie, just 
because I don't want to go running head long into what could be a 
wizard's trap, doesn't mean I didn't hear ye."  I turned and saw a 
two-foot tall man standing by the bathroom door smoking a briar pipe. 
"Now, lassie, gettin' the attention of one of the wee folk is easy. 
Convincin' us to stay?  There's the trick.  So what brings you to 
call for a leprechaun, even calling to ol' Patty by name?"

I explained everything to him, from my husband's smoking as a teen to 
Maya telling me about her wish.  Then I asked, "Could I get a wish to 
help my husband?"

"Well, yuir not entitled to one.  Your family had one wish and your 
cousin used that one.  But you could be purchasing one by giving me 
the coin ye hold."

"Done."  I handed the coin to Patty.

"Now what is it you'd like?  And take a lesson from yuir kin. 
Consider your words carefully."

I thought about everything.  I didn't just want my husband to get his 
singing voice back, I wanted him by my side on stage, so I said, "I 
wish my husband had his singing voice back so he could join my band 
and sing alongside me."

"Lassie, I can tell you've got a good heart and your intentions are 
good, so I'll give you a warning.  You'll be wanting to rethink that 
wish."

"Why?  What's wrong with it?"

"Can't tell you that."

"Why not?"

"I am bound by ancient law not to tell you what to or what not to 
wish for.  Telling you what's wrong is effectively the same as 
telling you what not to wish for."

"That doesn't sound fair."

"Ah, but it's fair that got these laws set in the first place. 
Centuries ago, before Oberon, The Great Lord of the Fae, set the 
rules, wish granting was a popularity contest.  If you were on the 
good side of the wish granter, you got exactly what you wanted, no 
matter what you said.  But if you weren't liked, what you said was 
twisted and corrupted in the worst possible way.

"Now faeries live in the realm where dreams and reality overlap, and 
the anger of those harmed by bad wishes was poisoning our land.  So 
Oberon laid down the law.  If we could not be trusted to grant wishes 
without bias, then we would be bound to the letter of the wish.  The 
exact wording, no matter how badly worded, would be what fae were 
required to grant.

"But we little folk are nothing if not crafty, even in obeying the 
laws of Great Oberon.  If the faerie liked the wisher, he would tell 
the lad or lass exactly what to wish for, spelling it out in no 
uncertain terms.  If he didn't...  Well, any language has a certain 
amount of lee way for interpretation.  So the great wise one ruled 
again.  The Fae would not be allowed, either positively or 
negatively, to tell a person what to wish for.

"That reduced the popularity factor to a manageable level, but there 
was still a problem.  In a time when most of humanity was illiterate 
and had a very poor command of their native tongue, many good, poor 
people were being slighted for innocent errors, so Oberon created a 
caveat.  If the faerie likes the wisher and thinks him worthy, the 
fae may grant ONE warning to re-think the wording on his, or her, 
wish, which I have just given you.

"So take your time, consider what you want, and choose your words 
carefully.  And remember I can only grant one warning, which I have 
already done, so whatever you wish for, I either grant it or return 
your gold and walk away, but the only way I'll do that is if the wish 
is bound to cause only problems."

I considered the wording on my wish.  The only thing I thought of was 
that by saying 'could' that meant that he might not actually become a 
member of my band, either because of a personality conflict with the 
girls or because he'd go solo.  So I wished, "I wish that my husband 
was a fellow singer in my band, with his beautiful voice restored."

Patty sighed.  "Worse than the first, but... granted."  He snapped 
his fingers, and he and the coin were gone.

Then I heard Timmy's voice.  The good news was that his beautiful, 
beautiful voice with its wonderful tones was back.  The bad news was 
that he was yelling, "What the fuck?"

I ran into the main room of our suite.  Standing there over the desk 
was a beautiful woman with this massive pair of breasts.  I didn't 
get it.  "Timmy, is that you?"

"Dana, what happened?"

"It wasn't supposed to be like this."

"What are you talking about?  What do you know about this?"

I explained everything.  "But I never envisioned anything like this."

"What did you wish for?  Exactly."

"I said, 'I wish that my husband was a fellow singer in my band, with 
his beautiful voice restored.'"

He looked at me like I was stupid.  "You don't see the problem with that?"

"No."

"You wished for me to be a member of your band?"

"Yes."

"Your ALL-GIRL band?"

I cringed.  "I'm sorry, Timmy.  I just wanted you by my side on 
stage.  I didn't mean for this to happen."  He looked down, shaking 
his head.  "Timmy?"

He chuckled a bit.  "Well, I always said I'd do anything to get my 
voice back."  He looked up.  "The question is, are you still going to 
want me?  As a woman?"

I stepped up to him, took him in my arms, and plastered my lips to 
his.  "I'll be yours forever, no matter what you look like.  Although 
I wonder what cup size you are."

"Want to bet H?"

I got it.  "The rest of us are D through G, so you inherited H.  I'm 
sorry, Timmy."

"Don't worry about it.  And call me Tammy.  No one's going to believe 
I used to be Timmy."

And that was how Tammy, my co-lead singer, was born.  Patty did give 
me a little forgiveness.  Tammy's a she-male, still having her dick. 
Her voice also blends perfectly with mine, and now even the critics 
are having to give us respect.

There were some problems early on.  The group remembered Tammy from 
the auditions, but thought she hadn't joined immediately because of 
some other personal reasons, and now she could.  But everyone also 
remembered Timmy and we had to come up with a reason why he wasn't 
around.  Tammy said that he couldn't handle being so near the 
entertainment industry without being part of it anymore, so he gave 
her all the business stuff and left.  I didn't like the thought of 
everyone thinking Tim ran off, but figured it was up to him.

Tammy and I as an item was a bit of a problem.  You see, Erin's a 
lesbian and made it clear that if I ever wanted to try the "other 
side of the tracks", she'd be more than willing to be my first.  When 
she found out she wasn't, she was a bit cold to both of us.  Tammy 
solved that one by inviting her to our bed.  She was a bit weirded by 
Tammy's crotch, but gave it a try, and loved it.

It wasn't much longer before Diane and Julie, both bi and 
experimental, were joining us.  It's kind of ironic.  Now that we're 
getting full credit for our singing, in private, we've become the sex 
act everybody accused us of being before.  Go figure.

I told Maya all about Tammy.  She thinks that after I learned about 
how much fun she and Lee were having, I subconsciously wished for 
exactly what I got.  I don't think that was it, but I can't help but 
wonder what it would be like to have Tammy's dick be detachable and 
sharable.
-- 
"This is reality, not T.V.  Can't you tell the difference?"
"Sure.  I just like T.V. better."

J R D
jrdss@pobox.alaska.net

-- 
Pursuant to the Berne Convention, this work is copyright with all rights
reserved by its author unless explicitly indicated.
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