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Message-ID: <33518asstr$1005999003@assm.asstr-mirror.org>
From: fcastratus@softhome.net (Fidelius Castratus)
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NNTP-Posting-Date: 17 Nov 2001 08:20:04 GMT
Subject: {ASSM} New: The Bulldog Blows Himself (M, solo, oral, glory-hole dreams)
Date: Sat, 17 Nov 2001 07:10:03 -0500
Path: assm.asstr-mirror.org!not-for-mail
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The Bulldog Blows Himself

The plastic surgeon entered the examining room wearing a gas
mask.

"Well Mr. Bulldog, according to the chart, you wish to have
your stomach stapled.  I see that your weight is close to
500 pounds, so that procedure is something I would
definitely recommend.  I also see that you wish to have your
penis lengthened.  Please lift up the gown."

The Bulldog did as asked.

"I don't see anything," said the plastic surgeon.

"Exactly, doctor," said The Bulldog.

"Hmm.  How large is your penis when it's in its erectile
state?"

"Almost a quarter inch."

"Well, I'm sure insurance will cover a penis enlargement
procedure, although I must warn you that you will probably
only see an inch or *maybe* two inches improvement.
However, that will *almost* be functional for sexual
purposes.  It's this last surgical request that I find
shocking.  It says here that you would like to have 'as many
of your ribs removed as possible'.  Please explain."

"Well, doctor.  It has always been my desire to feel a, um,
penis, um, ejaculate in my mouth."

"I can certainly see how losing weight and having a larger
penis might facilitate obtaining a sexual partner, although
I find it curious that you are not requesting facial
reconstructive surgery, since it's obvious that you've been
in some horrible fiery accident."

"I was born this way doctor."

"Hmm.  Still, I think we can get insurance to pay for such a
procedure.  One look at a picture of you will convince them
that you need it to have any kind of a normal social life."

The doctor took a second look at The Bulldog.  "But then
again, all I can guarantee is that people won't vomit when
they look at you.  You will probably still find it
impossible to have a social life, let alone be able to
obtain a sexual partner."

"I realize that, doctor.  Even my own mother abandoned me
because she couldn't bear to look at me.  Obtaining a sexual
partner isn't my goal."

"I hope you don't mind me asking what your goal *is*, and
how having your ribs removed fits into that goal?"

"Although I would prefer to, um, suck *another* man's cock,
I realize that will never happen, so I want to perform oral
sex on myself."

"If, as you put it, 'sucking a man's cock' is your goal,
then maybe you could perform this act anonymously behind a
'glory hole' at some sort of gay establishment."

"Unfortunately, doctor, my natural stench makes that
impossible.  Even bathing can't rid me of it."

"I forgot.  That's why I'm wearing this gas mask.  Of
course, removing your ribs will not be covered by
insurance..."

"I recently came into a sizable inheritance.  I have the
money.  Please, doctor, help me realize my life-long goal."

"Well, it's highly unusual, but after you lose weight from
the stomach stapling procedure, I'll do it."

A year passed, and The Bulldog lost enough weight for the
plastic surgeon to remove The Bulldog's ribs.  After a
lengthy recuperation period, and intensive Yoga exercises,
the big day finally arrived...

The Bulldog bent himself over, and was finally able to get
his tiny little penis inside his own mouth.  He had been
imagining what this would be like since he was a child, and
had been practicing by sucking on the tip of his little
finger.  Of course, even after the penis enlargement
procedure, his penis was far smaller than his little finger,
but nothing had prepared him for the joy of actually feeling
a penis inside his mouth.  Not only that, but his mind felt
like it was split in two by the twin pleasures of having a
penis in his mouth, and having a mouth on his penis.  Up
until now, he had only experienced his own fingers on his
penis.

The Bulldog ejaculated immediately, a single drop of semen
dispersing itself on the taste buds of his tongue.  The
pleasure was so intense that The Bulldog died.

They found him bent over like that several weeks later.  At
first, the neighbors had thought that The Bulldog had
stopped bathing, and that's why the stench had increased.
But even though his nearest neighbors were a quarter mile
away, the stench of his rotting, decaying body eventually
became too much, and the police were called.

An autopsy report revealed a second drop of semen on The
Bulldog's putrid chin.  The autopsy did *not* reveal that
The Bulldog had died before he released that second drop, or
that having a man come on his face was The Bulldog's second
greatest desire.  A desire left unfulfilled, in *this* life.

--

Fidelius Castratus

-- 
Pursuant to the Berne Convention, this work is copyright with all rights
reserved by its author unless explicitly indicated.
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