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Subject: {ASSM} The Telemarketer (very short)
Date: Sun, 4 Mar 2001 02:10:02 -0500
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THE TELEMARKETER
by
RICK JORDAN
"Hello?"
"Mr. Jordan? I'm Cindy Baker from American Surveys."
"Hey, baby. What are you wearing?"
"What!?"
"I said, what are you wearing?"
"..."
[CLICK]
Works every time. It's getting impossible to sit down to dinner
without...Shit! Here we go again."
"Hello."
"I should report you. I didn't call to get an obscene phone call."
"And I didn't answer to get a sales pitch. We're even."
"..."
[CLICK]
I should just let it ring...no, I can't.
"Hello."
"Who do you think you are? This job is tough enough."
"Get another job that doesn't involve interrupting my dinner. Are you
wearing a bra?"
"You're such a jerk!"
[CLICK]
Maybe she's right. But right now, I'm just hungry...Crap...not again.
"Hello."
"I just think you could be more courteous."
"OK. PLEASE tell me what color your panties are?"
"Damn you!"
[CLICK]
I probably ought to go out to dinner instead. Oh man, not again.
"Hello."
"They're ...blue."
"What?"
"My panties. They're blue."
--
Pursuant to the Berne Convention, this work is copyright with all rights
reserved by its author unless explicitly indicated.
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