I don't remember leaving the hospital. I don't know how I got by the Chicago riverfront. I was just there, walking through the cold, dark velvet night. The chill in the air helped remind me I was still alive. I knew I was breathing, I could see it in the air. I was otherwise numb. My world had ended at 11:59 p.m. The Doctor, had covered the face of my love with a sheet, and said how sorry he was, there was nothing else to do.

I was sorry too, the tears falling unheeded from my eyes showed the world I grieved. I didn't even feel them fall.

In my mind, the time was summer, the spot was New York, and we walked down Broadway, holding hands and laughing about the strange people passing us on their various errands.

Saving up the special sights that raised our temperature, so we could play later in our hotel room.

Roman loved to play. I can almost feel the tickle of his breath, as he whispers in my ear. I can almost feel the quick silver shiver of delight I felt then, as he slipped his hand below my shirt and cupped my breast. Tweaking the nipple till it ached for much more than we could or would do, in a public area. He was like that, tease me till I ached for him, then take me home and savage me till dawn.

Suddenly, home sounded like a wonderful idea. I flagged down a cab. Within minutes I was walking into a home that had become a refuge, against a world empty of my love. Here it still smelt of his pipe, and cologne. Here his papers and books were strewn over his desk.

I hurried to the bedroom. It seemed important to strip off my clothes, and surround myself with his scent. I wrapped my naked body inside his terrycloth robe. The comfort of the rough fabric almost felt like a caress.

Pulling the covers back, suddenly cold, I cuddled on his side of the bed. The pillow, the sheets everything smelled like him. I closed my eyes and willed it to be a bad dream.

I opened them to the softest of kisses. There was Roman, fresh from the shower, wrapped in a towel, laughing cause I had his robe. 'Looks better on you anyway pygmy." He growled. I reached for him and he shook his head No.

"No touching tonight pygmy, let me love you." He whispered.

I obediently raised my arms and grabbed the headboard. He opened the robe, and I felt him nuzzle my neck, then bite it softly. "I love the way you taste, I always will you know."

I tried to talk and he shook his head again, No.

His mouth went slowly down my front, his hands gathered my breasts in as he suckled them ,as if newborn and requiring all the nourishment he could receive from me. " You are so giving, my love give me your pleasure to remember forever. I came with his mouth on my nipples, first the right and then the left.

He traced a path down my belly to the fiery center of my being. "I love this so, pygmy, the taste and heat of you ." His mouth was over me and the heat of his kisses, and his sweet tongue had me melting and giving him all my essence, I could not refuse.

He lay next to me, I could feel his heat. I tried to move to please him. He would not allow it. Softly he kissed my eyes closed and took my mouth gently merging his tongue with mine so I could taste me on him ."Let's rest now, my love. Close your eyes like a good girl."

I didn't want to, afraid of what I could find when I opened them again. I did it anyway. The next thing I felt was morning sunshine on my face, as the ringing of the phone brought me back to a world I didn't wish to face.

I could now however with the memory of a love that overcame the boundaries of time.

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