Adults Only

Pissie

This story contains: FF, Lesbian, First, Rom, Consensual FemDom, WS, Public, Shaving, Mast and is intended for Adults Only
Pissie is copyrighted by Rebecca Stancil 2007 and may not be reposted without permission. h.s.sweetheart@gmail.com

Synopsis: When 19 year old Prissy goes to college she decides it's finally time for her to be herself. She dyes her hair blonde, changes her name to Pissie, and comes out of the closet as a lesbian piss slut...But will she ever find true love?

Pissie
By High School Sweetheart


Chapter 1 - Part 1

When I was nineteen I broke out of prison. Well, not really, but it felt like that. I just finally got to leave home and go to college. It sounds different, I know, but you don't know my parents either. Too much of anything can be bad, even love, and to tell the truth I was a little suffocated with it. So the college I went to was about as far away from home as I could get.

My name is prissy anyway, no I mean it really is Prissy, and that is a terrible name. Maybe even worse than you can imagine if you're thinking I grew up being called Pissie, because I was, but not only that I was sort of into it too. Like secretly, you know. By myself, in the bathroom, that sort of thing.

And so people would tease me in grade school, not so much in high school because I filled out nicely when I was around 14 and 15, but in 7th and 8th grades, like that, other kids, girls who didn't like me, they'd call me Pissie and I'd pretend I didn't like it. 

But you know what? I'd go home and remember those girls and what they'd said and I'd slowly but surely learn how to masturbate. I mean it isn't all that hard, but the exploring, finding out what I liked, getting used to my body. Yeah, all that stuff, I was doing it and more often than not, before I could have even those little sort of orgasms that I thought were so good back then, I'd usually end up peeing on my fingers. I liked that a lot.

And that grew over time to where I liked being naked, in the empty bathtub, laying on the cold porcelain and really just getting myself off while I pissed in my cupped hands and rubbed it over my body, my growing breasts. My face especially, I loved the taste of my own pee. I'd been scared of it at first, but I got over that quickly and I'd lick my hands clean, and eventually I was sipping and then drinking the stuff.

All by myself, of course. I wasn't crazy or stupid, not by any stretch, and I was careful not to get caught. I spent a lot of time in the bathroom, and public ones too, sitting in a stall and playing with myself while girls at school came in and pissed next to me, just on the other side of the partitions. Or at the mall, getting myself off while anonymous women used the toilets around me. 

I never thought it was bad. I didn't suffer any weird guilt trips. I wasn't hurting anyone, you know. But I couldn't tell anyone either, which was the big bummer in my life. That and being pretty gay, obviously. Not totally, I mean I wasn't like 100% sure I was queer for other girls, but when I closed my eyes and rubbed my pussy…Other girls is what I thought about, so…Yeah, I had a clue.

It was okay though, because my parents were so uptight it wasn't like I had to pretend I had a boyfriend. The fact was I couldn't have one anyways. I was a good girl, sweet and innocent and home by the time the streetlights came on, in bed by ten and holding a teddy bear. I'm serious, it sounds stupid, but that was me. I suck my thumb to this day, honestly, but I'm no baby or anything. I just have an oral fixation or something. I dunno.

Anyway, so I was such a good girl I had my pick of colleges and I picked a serious school, a woman's college in New Jersey, which is neither here nor their really. And I was free.

I was nineteen years old, 5'6" tall and a very proportional 110 pounds. My hair is boring brown, but I colored it blonde like 10 minutes after I moved into my dorm room, so it was golden really. Nice boobs, not big or anything, but firm and more than a handful, and topped with pretty pink nipples. The nubs themselves I mean, the areoles we're practically white, like the rest of me. 

I swear, if you saw my tits you'd think I just had nipples, sorta long and very pink, poking from pale round globes. You have to get close to see the little round patches of creamy skin around them. I shaved my pussy and I'd been doing that since I was 16, which isn't easy when you're mom is as anal and overprotective as mine was. I had to join the school swim team just so I could shave. I hate swimming, but it was a good enough excuse that my mom let me do it. Plus I got to see some of my friends up close and personal after school.

I have a cute face too; everybody likes my face, mostly because I'm seriously animated. Like every possible emotion I experience is just there for everyone to see when I talk. Surprise, anger, joy, whatever. My green eyes and little upturned nose, even my full lips and my dimples, especially my dimples…Everything just gives me away and a lot of my friends like to say things, weird things, just to see my face react.

I feel like a cartoon sometimes, I swear. But I'm cute and people see me they smile, friends and strangers alike. It helps that I'm totally outgoing too, of course. I'm a people person, no doubt, which is hard to believe considering I lived like Rapunzle at home. Probably I'm just making up for lost time though. That's my excuse anyway.

So…Now that we know about me…See, I told you I like to talk!

I was staying in a 22 room dorm, which seemed kind of big, but it really wasn't. All girls, of course, and there was a lady there who kept us in line, because we were all freshman. We didn't call her our Dorm Mother though, she hated that, so we called her Patty. And I figured out like as soon as I got there, within seconds that I didn't have to be Prissy anymore. I mean none of these people knew me at all, and how unusual was it to have a given name, a proper name, but really to be known by something else? Like a pet name, or a nick-name. It isn't rare at all, especially at college where if you don't have one, they'll give you one.

So you're better off giving yourself a name that you like.

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Chapter 1 - Part 2

"Hi, I'm Patty." The woman said and she was older, in her forties. Nicely shaped and motherly, but not a mother, that was for sure. Big sisterly would be a better expression. 

"Hi." I nodded. "I'm Pissie."

I smiled and looked around a little. I'd just gotten out of my taxi, lugged my suitcase up to the door and inside, and now I didn't know what I was supposed to do.

"Pissie?" The woman gave me a little look and I noticed she had a folded up piece of paper and she opened it. "Prissy?"

"Yeah, but…" I shrugged, and probably blushed. "…I like Pissie. Everybody calls me that." It was a white lie, but I'd made up my mind.

"Okay." She said slowly. "Pissie then. Do you have your letter?" 

"Oh, yeah." I nodded and so then I was Pissie. I got my room assignment from Patty and she showed me where everything was, gave me my little orientation packet, which basically said be at such and such place at such and such time for freshman orientation, you know. It was all pretty easy and Patty was nice enough, once she got used to my new name.

There were a dozen girls there already and we still had a couple days before the school year really started, so other girls would be arriving over the next few days. I colored my hair, first thing. I mean I really hated my hair, just plain brown. Ugh! Blonde seemed a lot more fun and I got one of the girls to help me, Carol, who was tall and pretty with black hair and even black eyes. I mean the color, not like someone…never mind. Anyway, she helped me color my hair and that was fun.

We were in the big bathroom, it was a community bathroom, so there were like 7 sinks and mirrors and toilet stalls. The showers were in a separate room, right next door, a community shower with eight shower heads and pretty pink tile on the floor. Just outside that was a changing area and there were even little lockers there, enough for all of us to put our soap and shampoo in. It was simple and nice, although some girls complained about not having bathrooms in their rooms.

I was just wearing a towel, an old one I'd brought from home, wrapped around my breasts with the end tucked in between them. Naked underneath, I was going to take a shower anyway as soon as we were done. Carol just wore cutoff jeans and a t-shirt and I hoped she wouldn't stain it, but she didn't seem worried about it.

"I never met anyone named Pissie before." Carol was smiling at me in the mirror. "Doesn't it sorta…bother you?" She giggled a little self-consciously.

"No, uh-huh." I smiled back, trying not to move too much as she squeezed color out of the plastic bottle. "I like it."

"Well, that's cool then." She shrugged. 

Carol was just eighteen, a little younger than me, and she'd come from a small town in Pennsylvania. And we talked for awhile, about nothing really. Our families mostly, laughing at how dumb they were, and how strange college was going to be, all that stuff.

"Do you have a boyfriend?" I asked, and I was hitting on her, or trying to anyway. 

But it wasn't like I had a lot of experience or anything, so mostly it just sounded like chit-chat, innocent girl talk, but I was trying, you know. Making eye contact in the mirror and smiling a lot, but that didn't seem to be going anyplace, so I figured I'd try something else.

"Yeah, sorta." Carol smiled, and she was really pretty when she did that. "He's not going to college or anything."

"Oh." I nodded, like I understood.

"How about you? Got a boyfriend back in Seattle?"

"Me?" I giggled and let my face show how silly that idea was, because my face was good at that. "No way." I shook my head, just a little.

"No way?" Carol giggled too, but she was confused probably, since I was cute and didn't cute girls have boyfriends? "Why?"

"I don't like boys." I smiled at her, looking into her reflected eyes.

"Oh." She blinked at me and then deciphered what I was saying. "Oh, you mean you're a…" She turned really red, it was sweet and I nodded, just a little.

"Lesbian. Yeah." I sucked my lips a little.

"Okay, yeah. That's cool. I mean…" She didn't have any idea what to say now.

"It's okay." I told her. "I'm not gonna bite you or nothing."

"Ah…" She giggled. "…I just never. So, um…Do you have a girlfriend? Or anything?" Carol asked slowly, like she wasn't sure if I'd get mad or something, but I just thought it was kind of funny.

"Not yet." I sighed a little, frowning. "I definitely need one though."

"Yeah, well sure." Carol cleared her throat and looked at her watch. "Uh, we should rinse your hair now. I think it's long enough."

"Okay." I was easy and I just bent over so my head was over the square porcelain sink, turning my face so Carol could rinse my hair for me. 

I don't know what I was expecting, like maybe the first girl I'd meet at college would be a pretty lesbian and we could live happily ever after or something. She was pretty straight though, and we both knew it, so I wasn't gonna stalk Carol or anything. She knew I was into girls now, and probably suspected that I wouldn't mind being into her, but at least she didn't run away. That was a big plus.

Another big plus was the strange but true fact that once you come out with one person, one girl in a dorm, within 12 hours every girl there is going to know. Now I'm not saying Carol went door to door to spread the news that I was gay. She probably only mentioned it, you know like "Oh, have you met Pissie? She's really nice, yeah…She's a lesbian, yeah, she told me. It's not a secret or anything. But she's really nice too."

Something like that, and then the other girl told another one, they told two more, four becomes eight, yeah. So by breakfast, when I wandered downstairs after my first night at college, there were a dozen girls all looking at me. But trying not to look, you know? Like glances and smiles and little nods, that sort of thing.

Luckily though, I'm just not the sort of girl to get worked up about that. I thought it was sorta cool, actually, being the center of attraction. It was a new experience for me.

"Mmmm…Pop Tarts!" I grinned, "Cherry!" And I just leaned against the counter in my blue halter top and old worn through the knees blue jeans, waiting for my tarts to pop.

The other girls didn't really say anything at first, being all 18 or 19 and fresh off the farm, so to speak. None of us were from New Jersey, I didn't think. Not that it matters, I'm just talking and so I was waiting and I figured I oughta say something, you know, especially since I really hadn't met all of them yet.

"You guys like my hair?" I asked, combing my fingers through it. It had turned out good, I thought, like golden blonde and it was so weird seeing myself like that.

"Yeah, it looks great." A girl said. "I'm Renee."

"Hi. Thanks, yeah. Carol did it for me last night." I smiled at Carol and she actually blushed a little, like I'd said we'd kissed or something.

"What color was it?" Another girl asked, she was sort of mousy with short brown hair. 

"Brown." I told her and I laughed, because she did. "You should color yours."

"You think?" She touched her hair and that was cool because then everybody was talking and we all got introduced and it was hopefully obvious that despite my weird name and my being a lesbian I wasn't much different from any of them.

I know some of them were a little put out by it though, just because some people are. They don't really have a reason, who does? They just never met a girl who would come out and say she was queer.

"Are you really gay?" The mousy girl asked me later. Her name was Olivia but everyone called her Liv. 

"Yeah." I nodded and then smiled. "Are you?"

"Me?" She sort of gave me big brown eyes. "No, uh-uh."

"That's okay." I smiled. 

"Yeah." She nodded. And then me and her and Carol went out for some pizza, which was fun.

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Chapter 1 - Part 3

It took about a week, or eight days I guess, according to my diary, before my boldness paid off. 

I was in the shower, by myself which wasn't unusual, just as taking a shower at the same time as some of the other girls wasn't weird either. A couple girls avoided me though, I knew that, but most of them were okay and didn't treat me any different.

Anyway, I was in the shower and I was shaving my pussy, which I do every three days or so, sometimes less because it does grow kind of quick and I hate stubble totally. 

"Does that hurt?" Linda's voice surprised me. She was just coming in, or maybe she'd been standing there watching me, I wasn't sure.

She was 18 like most of the girls, and about my height, maybe an inch taller, with smallish breasts and big thick nipples, like really puffy. I loved her nipples. A nice body with a really great ass. Her face was cute, with a small mouth and soft brown eyes beneath shoulder length auburn hair, brown with just a hint of red in it.

"What? Shaving?" I paused what I was doing. "Nope, not at all."

"Oh." She nodded, but it was one of those things where you know she wants to say something more.

"You want to try it?" I asked her. "I'm just about done. You can use my razor." 

I glanced down at her sex, not like staring, just a quick look and I'd seen her naked before anyway. Linda had a lot of hair. Her legs were smooth, I don't mean she looked like a wookie, just that her pussy was thick with pubic hair. I couldn't even see her lips or anything hardly.

"Uh, I got one." She smiled, "For my legs, my underarms, like that."

"Sure." I nodded and went back to work on my pussy, and I was pretty close to done, but now Linda was watching me so I was going slower, and I didn't turn away from her at all.

"Do you…" She started saying and then stopped, just standing there watching me with the water spraying on her back and shoulders. She was touching her stomach, not really knowing what to do with her hands, I guess.

"What?" I asked, turning a little so I could rinse my pussy off. It was smooth and pink now and my clit was hard as hell, because it always got like that when I shaved. Linda could definitely see my clit cause it's like an inch long and bright pink, seriously unmistakable.

"Could you show me how?" She asked and she was almost wincing like I was going to laugh at her or something.

"Yeah." I smiled. "Sure, it's easy. You want me to show you now?"

"Um." Linda swallowed so hard I could hear it. "Can you show me in your room? Maybe?"

"Sure, okay." I nodded. "But it's kind of easier with running water." I giggled, and that just shows how inexperienced I really was at that time.

"Oh, ummm…" She didn't seem to want to do it there, and I could see Linda's point. I mean anyone could walk in and being shaved by another girl, especially a lesbian girl, well…

"But, yeah I guess if we got a towel damp, you know." I shrugged. "That would work." 

But mostly I figured all that hair she had was really gonna clog up a razor, but I had a little plastic packet with 4 or 5 new ones in it. You know, those disposable Lady Bic shavers. And I really wanted to shave her too, you know. I didn't seriously think she was coming on to me, I figured she just wanted to know how, which was okay. At least I'd get to see her up close, touch her a little maybe.

"Good." She let out a little sigh of relief. "Like tonight? Ummm a couple hours from now, is that okay?"

"Yeah, sure." I shrugged, but I'd mostly thought she'd meant like right now, so that was disappointing.

"Okay." She smiled. "I'll um, I'll bring a damp towel then. And my razor and…stuff."

"Okay." I nodded, thinking this was kind of weird, but sort of okay too.

I figured it out though, I mean she was coming to my room when everyone else would be gone out, or watching television, or just in their rooms reading a book. Nobody would see Linda coming into my room and I wondered if that meant something, or if it was like all the girls were gonna be that way. Then again, I was going to help her shave her pussy too, so…Duh! It had to mean something, right?

About quarter to nine there was a knock and it was Linda, naturally. She looked happy, but nervous too maybe and I might have been nervous, but I didn't exactly feel it. I don't get nervous a whole lot for some reason, like God forgot to put that bone in my body, or something. 

Linda was carrying her stuff, including a very wet and warm towel, like dripping wet and I laughed at her when I saw it, wondering what we were gonna do with that. She had her razor too, and a little can of shaving crème. So that was cool, but I had my stuff out too, just in case. It was weird having a girl come to my room so I could teach her how to shave her pussy. I mean nobody showed me, I just sorta did it. It wasn't complicated, but there had been some small worries about cutting something too, so maybe that was the deal with Linda.

"Hey, come on in." I smiled, still laughing at the towel thing a little, but I got the one I'd used for my shower earlier and we put hers on that.

"This is really nice of you, Pissie." Linda was smiling too, but not really relaxed. "Uh, are you gonna lock the door?"

I'd just closed it so I looked at her. "You think I should?" I asked, wondering why. 

Nobody was going to just walk in my room anyway, that was for sure, and all we were doing was shaving her pussy. Every girl in the dorm had one of those.

"I'm just shy." Linda made a little face. 

"Okay, sure." I shrugged. I turned the latch and she seemed to relax a little, becoming a little less tense anyway. "You want something to drink? I got um, ice tea and some diet Pepsi, or…uh, that's it."

"No, I'm okay." She stood in my room looking around. 

It looked just like hers, really. A simple bed, a desk and chair, a little fridge. I had some books scattered around, mostly so it wouldn't look so empty til I got some real stuff. I'd put up a poster of Cap'n Jack Sparrow, cause Johnny Depp was way cool. 

"I need to get some stuff." I giggled. "My room sucks, huh?"

"It isn't bad." Linda smiled, looking pretty all of a sudden. "It looks like everybody else's right now."

"Yeah." I nodded. "I really need a radio or something."

"Me too." Linda nodded and we were getting to the awkward silence part of our conversation.

"You wanna do this?" I asked, gesturing at the having crème and razor she was still holding.

"Oh, yeah." She giggled. "Sorry. Um, where should I sit? On the bed? Is that okay?"

"Yeah, that's great." I nodded. "Uh, take of your shorts though, and um, your panties, right?"

"Oh." She reddened and smiled, looking down. "Yeah. That would make it easier, huh."

She was wearing a small t-shirt, one of those short ones so I could see her flat tummy, and pink denim shorts. They were pretty cute, little short shorts, that showed off her legs and butt. I thought they were hot.

I'd sorta debated what I was gonna wear. I mean it was my room and mostly I just hung out in panties, not even a t-shirt or anything really, but I'd put on a little skirt, plain old white and pleated. It had been nice once, but now it was just for around the house, you know. And a blue t-shirt that had a picture of Donald Duck on it. I'd swiped it from my youngest brother, just cause I like Donald Duck. Don't ask me why.

So I waited while Linda got undressed, and she did it kinda half shyly and half not, like it was embarrassing for her either way, and she kept glancing at me to see if I was looking and you know I was. I had to, she was pretty and taking off her shorts. Linda had little red and white striped panties, real thin strips and bikini cut. She took those off slowly, with a little smile and a red face, and sat down quickly with her hands in her lap.

"Okay." I smacked my lips a little, grabbing my desk chair, which was where I'd put the towels, and moving it close. "So, you gotta get your pussy wet first…"

It felt dumb saying that, but I wasn't sure if she wanted me to go step-by-step or what.

"Uh…Pissie?"

"Yeah?" I looked at her. 

"Would you do it for me?" Linda asked slowly, stressing the word ‘for' a little.

"What? Shave you?" I kind of scratched my nose, cause it itches sometimes.

"Yeah." She nodded, looking into my face. "I might um, screw it up. Or something."

I laughed at her, gently for sure, but it was still a laugh cause it was kind of silly. 

"It's not a haircut." I grinned at her. "It's easy."

"Yeah, I know but…Would you?"

Now see, this was the problem with living in the prison that was my home for 18 years, because she was coming onto me hard. I'm sure you can see that, and I can definitely see it looking back, but at the time I had no experience with anybody coming onto me, except teenage boys at school. And I was gay, so they didn't count! I'd totally ignored those guys.

But here was Linda, a pretty 18 year old college coed in my locked dorm room with her shorts and panties off, asking me pretty please to shave her pussy. And I was trying to talk her out of it! Jesus, I was stupid.

Luckily even stupid people have guardian angels and the light bulb clicked on above my head.

"Uh, yeah, sure Linda." I sort of blinked because that light bulb was pretty bright and I suddenly realized I was probably going to have sex for the first time in my life. With someone other than myself, I mean. 

The easiest way for me to do it, really, was just to sort of kneel down by my bed and Linda faced me with her legs spread and she was sitting up at first, pretty red faced and smiling and breathing a little harder. I was breathing hard too, since she was like right there. I'd seen a lot of pussies before, of course, I mean I had one of my own, so it wasn't a mystery. But still…

"Maybe, uh…You got a lot of hair." I giggled and so did Linda. "Why don't you lie back a little and scoot your butt and, um…put your legs up, like that yeah…That's better."

So Linda had her heels on the bed, knees bent and her pussy like right in my face now, which was about making me crazy, and she was laying down with her head pushed up on some pillows. 

"Comfy?" I asked, licking my lips a little and Linda nodded. 

She was definitely excited too, I mean she was ripe. I know my pussy smells when I'm excited, not bad or anything, not like people a mile away can tell, but when you're close…Linda was the same way. I could smell her, a sweet musky scent, like teasing me like déjà vu or something and I felt my heart going faster.

I used that wet towel first, basically laughing as I wrung it out, dripping, almost pouring water out of it onto her sex, that's how wet it was. And it was warm too, which was good. And then I got some shaving crème and smeared it around, feeling her dark curly pubes under my fingers, and then her skin beneath that. 

I moved my fingers around kind of quick, cause you have to in order to get a good lather, but I wanted to go slow too, sort of exploring her through that green tinted foam. I lathered her for a long time, a lot more than I needed to and Linda was watching me, sometimes my fingers, sometimes my face, but watching me close and her breasts were rising and falling quickly now.

"Okay, um…This won't hurt or anything." I promised, taking her razor and knowing I'd be using hers and all of mine probably, because I didn't have a bowl of water to rinse them out in, just that towel.

"Mmmm…" Linda was biting her lip and nodding and I almost thought she was scared, but the way her hips shifted when she felt my hand on her thigh, sort of pushing her left leg a little wider, I knew she was trying not to cum.

Seriously, I know that sound and I know that look, I'd been masturbating for a long time by then and she was a lot like me in the orgasm department, I thought. That was exciting and a serious trip, knowing Linda was that turned on and I wondered how much of it was me, and how much was shaving. I mean it coulda been she was just really into being shaved, and it didn't matter by whom.

But I hoped it was cause she liked me. Linda liked showing herself to me, and being touched by me. That was what I hoped, and I shaved her slowly too. Very slowly, and I started at the edges, you know, the outside, moving inward towards her slit. I tried to figure out which way was best and that seemed to be it. My pussy shaves best from the inside out, really, but I guess different people's pubic hair grows different.

"I'm gonna have to sorta…" I said softly, not even finishing what I was saying as I just pinched her right labia gently, and it was plump and hot and greasy, and I pulled it a bit so I could get the soft little hairs growing near it. That about made Linda jump with excitement, feeling me pinching her lip like that.

I did the other one two and I was on our third razor by the time I was mostly done, just a bit more at the top really. I'd saved that for last, and I didn't say anything when I pressed my thumb on her hard little clit, all red and peeking out. I just did it, pushing it down so I could edge that raiser up from jus above it and she was shaking. Linda's knees moving back and forth and her hips were moving.

"You gotta stop moving." I giggled, feeling like I was right in the middle f running a four minute mile. I was hot and sweaty and my hear was pounding.

"I…I know…sorry…" Linda nodded, sucking air. "I'm just…Nervous…"

That almost made me laugh, I mean did I look stupid? She was like one finger away from cumming hard. All I had to do was blow on her clit probably and it would be over for her. But I didn't say anything, I just held my breath mostly, keeping my hands steady because Linda wasn't helping, and I finished her off. 

"There!" I smiled and she was as smooth as I was down there. Her pussy looked like a little girls, except it didn't really. It was nice and mature, with big brownish labes and a hard little clit and the skin was a little pinkish, even red, but I'd been careful too and the razors new, so no razor burn or nothing.

"Y-You're done?" Linda looked down at her pussy and I nodded, reaching for my dry towel so I could wipe her clean.

"Almost." I smiled. I got some baby oil, pouring some on my hand and I just really massaged her pussy.

I mean I didn't even ask or nothing, I just put my hand on her cunt and really started rubbing her nice, working that soft smooth oil around her skin. It was so sexy and I'd always wanted to do that to another girl and about 10 seconds after I started, Linda was cumming.

She closed her legs tight on my hand, grabbing my wrist with both her hands, and hunching her hips as I really just squeezed her pussy as best I could. I don't think it really mattered where I touched her, anyplace was good for Linda right then.

I slipped a finger inside her, playing between the folds of her pussy, and Linda was so hot inside it was incredible. I swear, like a furnace between her legs and I moved up, onto the bed because I wanted to kiss her, I'd never kissed anyone before, except myself in the mirror when I was like fourteen or something, and that had just been fooling around. 

I turned my hand, twisting my arm a little, and moved close to her as I kept rubbing her sex, and I kissed Linda's neck gently, and then her jaw and cheek and then her mouth…except she didn't really want to kiss me back. It was like I'd pushed her off switch or something, which was really weird. I mean she kissed me, a little, but Linda was tense and then she just stopped.

"What's wrong?" I asked softly, "Did I do something?"

"No, uh-uh…" She blinked at me and licked her lips and then Linda was moving, getting up. "I'm sorry, um…It's not you, okay? I uh…" 

And she was talking and saying nothing at all and I just watched her get dressed. I thought she was going to cry, really. She was totally embarrassed and I was too then, feeling pretty sure it was my fault. I mean something went wrong someplace, when I tried to kiss her so…That must have been it, right? 

"I'm sorry." I told her, even though I didn't know what exactly I was sorry about, except that she felt bad.

"It's me." She said again. "I shouldn't have, I…" Blah blah…

She left me, like really quickly, and I just lay there, looking at her wet towel, stained with shaving cream and dark bits of Linda's pubic hair. And her razor and mine, and I just grabbed my teddy bear not understanding at all what had scared her so much.

I figured it pretty much sucked being a lesbian right about then and I wondered if this sorta thing happened to guys too. I mean when they were trying to kiss a girl. Probably, I figured it was just me.

And I started thinking maybe college wasn't gonna be so much fun after all.

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End of 01

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