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CHARITY

 a short story by

 NICOLAS TRAVERS

 

   Graham Rappaport is a successful solicitor, comfortably into his mid-forties, senior partner in a prosperous country practice, pillar of his golf club, and a good father to his two teenage daughters. He also counsels the bereaved on two evenings a week, because he knows that good deeds are the most rewarding of actions.

   All his friends admire him, because he is a good man, and several wealthy local widows value his investment recommendations, because Graham counts good financial advice every bit as important as emotional support – particularly when it generates the odd copper in commission. Opinion in the Home Counties market town where he lives generally holds that he could shine as a JP, or a County Councillor, were he not so devoted to helping mitigate sadness, and moves are afoot to co-opt him as a fitting successor to the sitting, but ailing, Tory MP – for Jane Rappaport is already an influential member of the local Conservative Party committee, and the constituency ranks amongst the bluest of the blue. It is also commonly supposed that the Queen will one day grant Graham an OBE.

   However whilst his copybook is seemingly spotless, Graham also has a secret weakness, for he is a man with an adventurous libido. Nothing very daring, of course, because he is above all cautious. But he does like to explore the back streets of Soho two or three times a year, and have close dealings with hard-faced women who often know a good deal more about married men than married men’s wives, and he has been known to stand rather more close to his firm’s better looking secretaries than might normally be considered proper, and look down over the shoulders of young girls working in the accounts department, particularly when the weather is hot, and they have come bare-shouldered, and sometimes bare-legged, to work. He has also been seen dancing once too often with the firm’s divorced receptionist at the firm’s Christmas party, and office gossip whispers that his car has been seen parked outside the divorced receptionist’s house at a time when Graham claimed to all and sundry that he had been out counselling.

   However this afternoon he is counselling for real, for he has a new bereavement client, a wealthy widow named Patricia Rochford, fresh from burying her husband, and he is going to be charming, and on his very best behaviour, because Mrs. Rochford is rather an attractive woman in her late fifties, with a touch of ginger in her blonde hair, and a figure very neatly trimmed in her grief, possessed of a truly bulging portfolio of stocks and shares.

   They have already met in his office, for Mrs. Rochford has made it plain that she can handle grief, but might welcome good financial counselling, and she has notably turned his partners’ heads. But solicitors are pragmatic, and Graham’s partners have benevolently stood aside, allowing him to mount a major campaign to win her mandate as an investment adviser, and also – if he judges her rightly – to prepare his ground for offering a little more recreation at a later date as well, because Graham has a powerful inner feeling that this particular grieving widow might possibly tire very soon of sadness.

   In fact he hopes that today might well prove a magic one in this desirable progression, for he is now promoted from meetings at his office to an invitation to tea, and plans to strive his utmost to convert a prospectively dull business encounter into a cosy tete-a-tete, if Mrs. Rochford but gives him just half a chance – and of course he is wholeheartedly persuaded that he totally deserves that chance, for he is naturally shaping all his efforts in the very worthiest of causes, as part and parcel of a most dedicated counselling package.

   So he parks his gleaming BMW tidily, pats at his neatly brushed hair, and practices a sober solicitor’s smile at his rear view mirror before turning off his engine and engaging his handbrake.

   Mrs. Rochford’s house is impressive, large and solid, a fine early Victorian vicarage, set at the end of a short drive in grounds that Graham has quickly estimated with a professional eye at a good acre and a bit. He is sure that it will be comfortably furnished, with chintz loose covers on sofas and armchairs, an ancestral oil or two, because Mr. Rochford’s family were leading local landowners, and some nice bits of mahogany, not to mention a silver tea service and some good china, and he will have the name of the local auctioneer on the tip of his tongue, just in case the widow contemplates down-sizing, because the local auctioneer is a good friend, and generous with his backhanders.

   Nothing stirs, and it is a good sign, because Graham hates to hurry. He checks carefully that he has a new notepad in his smart black leather document case, that his glasses are spotless, and that his pen and propelling pencil are both functioning smoothly. Then he gets out of his car, stretches his legs, and admires himself in his car window.  A neat chubby face stares back at him seriously, the face of a dark-suited man of good intent, and Graham and good intent approve each other soberly.

   He straightens his tie fractionally, glances down at his feet to check that his toecaps are gleaming, and marches across the widow’s gravel to rap briskly at her front door.

   The house is silent for a moment, and then the door opens and a young woman inspects him coolly. She is slim, with green eyes set high in a long pale face dusted lightly with freckles and framed in a halo of red-gold flame, sleek in a green silk dress that is both exactly matched to her eyes, and really very smart for a country afternoon.

   Graham smiles his very best professional smile, and twinkles with just a hint of roguishness.  He knows that Mrs. Rochford has a daughter, married to a computer wizard rich from linking photography and digital technology in mysterious ways and generally away from home a great deal criss-crossing the North Atlantic, and has heard her described as raunchy, and a collector of scalps, and very possibly testicles into the bargain. He wonders momentarily how she views counselling solicitors, and his hopes grow warm, for Graham has a large opinion of himself, and secretly believes that a man might very well please more than one woman at a time.

   “I think I’m expected.” His voice is creamy with charm and desire.

   “You must be Mr. Rappaport.” Green eyes examine him appraisingly, and may even be twinkling back at him, and Graham feels his hand being clasped in a most welcoming gentleness. “I’m Laura Whiting. My mother says you have been a great help to her, a great comfort.” Gentle fingers hold him for several seconds longer than might be demanded by convention, and Graham glows as he senses that he is almost being caressed. But it is only a momentary encounter, and she steps back.

   “We thought you might like to join us for tea on the terrace, at the back of the house.” A slim hand gestures at the open door behind her.

   Graham follows her as she leads, and is torn between noting the way her dress clings to her hips as she walks, and a mental attempt to catalogue every potentially valuable object in sight. The hall is hung with several oils, all of them impressive, and one possibly a real treasure – an eighteenth century family group in a garden setting, a pastoral idyll – and he also notes a finely turned and veneered table and a couple of chairs that London salesrooms might be expected to die for.

   Flame hair and undulating silk lead on through a large drawingroom towards open French windows, and Graham’s mind clicks on faster than a computer, logging more pictures, more furniture, an elegant grand piano and some good Georgian silver candlesticks. The house is a real find, and really much too large for a middleaged woman living on her own. He can sense that he has a duty to provide good advice on turning one’s back on the past and moving ahead into the future, not too laden with regressive emotional baggage, on downsizing and revising and rebuilding, on creating a new space that might well eventually create its own need for a selfless and well-informed male comforter.

   But now he is out onto the terrace, blinking in the sun. A finely chiselled face smiles up at him from a chintz-upholstered garden chair, and he bends deferentially to touch the tips of long cool fingers.

   Mrs. Rochford is a picture of grace: delicious in a smart saffron linen dress, relaxed in her chair with an elegance that neither chubby and practical Jane Rappaport, nor Julia and Sonia, Graham’s two stocky and rather ungainly teenage daughters, could ever hope to emulate. She waves towards a chair set facing her, and Graham cannot but note two very large diamond rings on her fingers, and his nostrils flare in admiration as her movement scents the air with some delicate, but plainly very expensive fragrance.

   He perches respectfully, his eyes humble, albeit a touch calculating. This is a time to abase himself and serve, to know his place and at the same time to ingratiate himself.

   “Ah, Mr. Rappaport. How good of you to come.” Mrs. Rochford’s greeting is cut in the finest crystal, and she binds him with hazel eyes for a searching moment. Graham looks down, lowering his gaze with respect, but then quickly changes his mind and looks up again to hold her eyes levelly, allowing himself just a flash of ardour. This may be a time to serve as a lackey, but Mrs. Rochford is also a woman with a woman’s needs.

   She smiles faintly, and looks away, and he notes the elegance of the silver Queen Anne tea service set on a spotless cloth on the wrought iron garden table between them, and the delicacy of china that must be early Wedgwood or Spode. He is admiring trinkets to slay for.

   “My daughter is making tea for us, Hodge has the afternoon off.” The cool crystal voice peals from a world where there are cooks to cook, and maids to clean, and encompasses everything that Graham has ever sought to secure. He is alert on the edge of his chair with all the eagerness of a well-trained pointer: he stands at the door to a tabernacle, and waits on admission.

   “I think you brought some ideas with you.” Her voice rises on a gently interrogatory inflection, and Graham scrabbles for his notes. He knows that he must first clear business matters out of the way before he can move on to try laying the foundations for closer, warmer discussions.

   He sketches his proposals swiftly but deftly. Mrs. Rochford already holds most of her portfolio assets in a trust, to protect her daughter, but Graham suggests some interesting switches to increase her overall income, already a very tidy sum, and provide some added capital growth potential. He also hints delicately at possibilities for domestic asset realisations, just in case Mrs. Rochford should ever contemplate moving, and he has his auctioneer friend very much in mind.

   But hazel eyes cloud a little. “I don’t quite think I need to sell up yet.”

   It is a reproof, and Graham is quick to back away. “Of course not, ma’am.” He speaks as though to a duchess, and notes the approval in the way his listener shapes her lips. “But this is a large house.” He cocks his head judiciously, and his movement speaks volumes. “One day you may find it rather lonely.”

   Mrs. Rochford’s lips purse a little. “Perhaps.” But it is not a denial.

   Graham smiles. He has made his point. He goes on to generalise about economic and stockmarket prospects, underpinning his expertise, and adds some thoughts about a current uptrend in antiques and collectables. But he states no conclusions and forces no compliance – he has baited his lure, and his prey will find her own way to his net. He is concise and competent, neat and efficient, and he has noted all his thoughts on two sheets of paper, which polishes them well. Mrs. Rochford is intelligent enough to know her own mind, and his list of useful contacts appended at the end includes a selection of very reputable stockbrokers and auctioneers, all sworn verbally – though perhaps not in more binding form – to percentage paybacks. Graham is a country boy, and he knows how rural obligations are cemented.

   He holds out his two sheets, and looks up over them to gauge his penetration. Cool fingers take them, and cool hazel eyes appraise him with perhaps just a twinkle of amusement. It is plain that this woman knows his game, but judges it just. Perhaps her twinkle even denotes approval.

   Their twin inspection is broken by an approaching rumble of small wheels. The girl in green silk arrives, pushing a tea trolley laden with finely trimmed cucumber sandwiches and small pastries and a neatly divided pound cake , a kettle steaming on a spirit lamp, and a dish of quartered lemons.

   Graham springs to his feet. It is not a deference he pays to his wife, nor any female acquaintance, let alone the divorced secretary from his office. But he knows how the cream of the county conducts its affairs, and he wishes above all to be seen as correct.

   The girl smiles a dazzling response. “Please, don’t…” She gestures him back into his chair. “I’m sure you’re tied up planning things for my mother.”

    Mrs. Rochford holds up Graham’s two sheets of paper. “Graham,” she pauses after the word, to make sure her emphasis is fully appreciated in all quarters. “Graham is doing a first class job.”

    It is a brief phrase, but enough. Graham realises that he has been subtly promoted from servant to friend of the family, and he glows again.

   The girl in green silk smiles at him with all the warmth that a first class friend of the family might merit. “I only hope that my cucumber sandwiches match your financial planning.” She is leaning towards Graham, and her green silk dress is hanging away from the line of her body, and he finds himself looking straight into a soft green-shaded valley between two small rounded bosoms. He can see the girl’s nipples through the thin silk of her bra, or perhaps he is imagining them, but it does not matter. Her incline is an invitation, and he is momentarily her master, for it is for him to choose.

   For a moment libido well-nigh overwhelms him, and he licks his lips, because they are suddenly dry. But then he closes his eyes, and makes a great effort. He must take possession of himself, and regain total self-control.

   “Do you take lemon in your tea…, Graham?” The girl’s hesitation is arch, if almost infinitesimal, and it is a hard struggle for him to suppress the glow rising within him. He is accepted, and subsumed, he has joined the elect and he will feed at the table of the blessed, he has glimpsed the valley of delights, and he will sup of the pleasures therein.

   Tea, after that, is almost an anti-climax. Polite conversation flows, and a little gossip; they talk of local politics, and county ebbs and eddies, and mother and daughter tempt Graham into speaking a little of his aims and ambitions. Three souls are taking up positions, and fate will determine. But Graham is convinced that he has made a profound impression, and that he will reap where he has sown.

    Then their shared tea ceremony draws to a close, and Graham prepares reluctantly to leave. He glances surreptitiously at his watch. He has stayed a fair while longer than he expected, and he will have now to eat his evening meal alone, for Jane Rappaport is accustomed to shaping her catering around her daughters’ needs, and teenagers like to eat early so that they can keep their evenings free.

   Mrs. Rochford, now Patricia by invitation, seems reluctant to part with him. “You don’t really have to leave yet, Graham, do you?” Her voice is tempting, even enticing. “I would like to have shown you around – the house, the garden. I am sure a man of your tastes would find much to interest you.” Now her tone is really quite tempting.

   Laura Whiting smiles bewitchingly. “We have some chicken breasts – I had thought of roasting them with tomatoes and aubergines, with a glass or two of Sancerre on the side, and perhaps a little dish of crème brulee to follow, if you have a sweet tooth.”

   It is a siren call of seduction, and Graham hesitates. He is enormously tempted, for he has heard it said that Mrs. Rochford’s daughter is one of the best cooks for miles around, with an ability to hostess the kind of dinner parties that send lesser women into paroxysms of jealousy and rage, and he knows very well that his best hope at home must be for cold pork and mashed potatoes, with a small chunk of dried up cheddar and an elderly cheese biscuit to follow, washed down with a single bottle of cold lager.

    “Oh, do please stay.” Laura Whiting leans forward again, and he crumbles. Chicken breasts are temptation, but they are less than nothing by comparison with this soft green valley that beckons. Crème brulee will be his undoing, but he must be undone. He hesitates, and he is lost.

   “Er, I’d better call my wife.” It is the first time since his arrival that he has acknowledged any familial obligation, and it sits wholly askance with his hopes and dreams.

   “Of course, of course.” Patricia Rochford is perfectly understanding. “Laura will show you the phone.”

   Graham follows flame hair and undulating green silk again, and now the silk is vibrant with a barely secret invitation, and he is totally subsumed by lust. He has to make a determined effort to hold himself back from clutching at her as she stops in her mother’s drawingroom, and he drowns in her dazzling smile.

   The phone rings out, and he shapes his excuses as he pictures all his hopes. He has a feeling that he might be heading for a late evening, and he needs to conjure persuasive phrases, for Jane has also heard rumours about the divorcee, and he must shield her from alarm.

   Laura Whiting returns to her mother, and the two women smile at each other. But their eyes are rather stony for a social exchange.

   “He’s very pushy.” Laura stands looking down at her mother, and she is positioned so that she can keep one eye on Graham, now talking into the telephone, and safely out of earshot.

   Patricia Rochford shrugs slightly. It is plain that she is well aware of Graham’s aims and ambitions. “He’s vain.”

   The younger woman smiles again, and this time her face is very hard. “But not much of a stallion.”

   They both consider the thought, and Patricia Rochford gets to her feet. “He needs teaching a lesson.” Her voice cuts her words out like chips of ice. But then her eyes light again as Graham returns to the garden terrace.

   “Ah, Graham. Laura is going to clear up and prepare dinner whilst I show you around.”

   She takes his arm, and Graham swells with pride, tinged just a little with lust. He smiles lubriciously at Laura as she starts to busy herself with clearing away the tea things. He has read of men bedding women in pairs, mothers and daughters even, but such things have always remained beyond the borders of his wildest imaginings. Yet now he seems to be entering a dream, and his imagination starts to whirl within him.

   Patricia Rochford guides him through her drawingroom into an opulent diningroom, and her hand is warm on Graham’s arm. They climb a staircase lined with more family portraits, and a stag that must be a Landseer, and Graham stares longingly through an open doorway into a bedroom where a huge bed calls him like a magnet. But it is not to be, not yet to be, and they descend again, to tour an immaculate garden, and he must perforce admire shrubs and parterres and bedding plants, when a bed is his only ambition.

    Patricia Rochford chats amicably as she guides him, and they are cementing a friendship. But Graham takes care to observe all the proprieties, and keeps a little distance from her. He is a cautious man, and it is better that she makes the running.

   They return to the house, and tempting food smells scent the air, and they sip sherry until they are summoned to table. Laura’s meal is delicious – everything that Graham might have expected, and more. They start with a home-made shrimp pate on home-made oatmeal biscuits, and chicken breasts become proxies for far more lascivious pleasures. Laura fills his glass, and then again, and again, and Graham protests in vain, because he is assured that a spare bed awaits him if he feels he is drinking too much, and he is pampered, and flattered, and made to feel very significant, and he is nicely stuffed, like a piglet being fattened for a wedding.

   He gorges himself on crème brulee, and sips gluttonously on an oak-matured Armagnac, and he is in heaven. This is a bliss that no man could normally attain, and the fact that his pleasure is straying so far beyond the frontiers of his everydays is a promise that he has merely reached the bounds of a known world, to step out on a path leading onwards and upwards into what he increasingly hopes will prove a most sensual paradise.

   Here he realises that he is growing just a little tipsy, and a tiny warning light flashes. But his two companions are the very soul of warmth and understanding and encouragement, and both now have a certain way of smiling at him, and are now playing on words with him in ever more tempting sallies, that he is certain soon all will be permitted without let or hindrance, and he swamps his light with several more mouthfuls of Armagnac, and it fades, and is then wholly extinguished.

   Laura Whiting clears the table, and carries plates away, and then soft dance music fills the air. It is Latin American, a tango, perhaps most sensual of all dances, and she essays a few steps before him, and her body is an open invitation.

   “Do you dance, Mr. Rappaport?”

   Graham stares at her in surprise, for it is several hours since she has used his surname. But she is smiling as she speaks, and holding out her hands, and moving her body in quite the most irresistible gyrations, and he rises to his feet, swaying just a little, to join her.

   They dance, and he can feel her body pressing against him, and then he dances with her mother, and he is moving with two women in need of a man, and he is a man, and he knows that he must soon do what is expected of him. But he is also hot, and sweating a little, and he does not demur as Laura peels his jacket from his shoulders, and he is slavering as she sheds her dress, to dance alone in front of him in her pale green silken slip, and her mother is a shadow in the background, and turn must take turn, and he is now completely naked, but for his socks.

   Suddenly the room explodes in a blinding flash, and is immediately plunged into total darkness. Graham looks around him wildly in the dark, but he can see nothing. He covers himself with his hands, and he is riven with terror. The room is silent for a moment, and then he hears a mocking laugh.

    “Congratulations, Mr. Rappaport. We’ve caught you on candid camera.”

   Another moment of icy fear, and the room is lit again. But now Graham is alone, and his clothes are strewn untidily at his feet. He snatches them up in a panic, and buttons his shirt and zips up his trousers with trembling fingers. His head starts to thump unpleasantly, and all his earlier joy and expectation and euphoria are now just distant memories. He has stumbled unwittingly into some kind of nightmare, and he must escape.

   Somehow he finds his way back to the front door of the house and stumbles out to his car, his tie trailing from one of his jacket pockets. Somehow he manages to find his way back onto the road and head for his home, pausing on the way to tidy himself and check that he has all his possessions. Somehow he manages to creep up to his marital bed and fend off sleepy marital questions. Somehow he sleeps.

   Breakfast next day is a tense meal. Graham’s mind is a frozen landscape of conjecture, agony, and worse. He is short with Jane, and curt with his daughters. He knows that he has been made the victim of some kind of bizarre practical joke, some dreadful female prank, and he has an awful presentiment that he has not heard the last of it. The papers arrive, and he picks at them listlessly, his mind wholly elsewhere, as Jane opens a large brown envelope bearing her name, though no other address, nor any stamp.

   She takes out a large photograph, and catches her breath, and Graham glares at her. They are alone in their kitchen – both Julia and Sonia have left for school. She does not look at him, but lays the photograph on the table, and quickly gets to her feet. A moment later she is gone.

   Graham glances irritably at the picture, and then stares at it in horror. It is a large, and remarkably clear, black and white print of him naked but for his socks, his face contorted in a leer that he might have intended as seduction, but is now only a wholly repellent grimace. His hands snatch at it, his fingers rip it to shreds. But the damage has been done, and he knows that he is going to have a very, very hard task ahead of him explaining this dreadful thing away, if he is ever to explain it away.

   He is in his car a moment later, heading for his office. He must escape to a peaceful haven, and assess what he must do next. The building is empty, and he sits at his desk and holds his head in his hands. His mind whirls. He is normally a very self-possessed and precise man, planning every working day with dry and careful exactitude. But normality has flown out of the window.

   His secretary knocks at his door, and it is a strange omen, for she normally enters his room without any warning. But Graham sees that she is now carrying a large brown envelope that she has already opened, and his blood freezes.

   She smiles slightly as she places the envelope in front of him, and it is a smile tinged with contempt. “Lots of copies came early this morning, Mr. Rappaport, one for each of the partners. The bank have rung to say they’ve had a couple as well.”

   Graham looks down at the envelope, but he does not touch it. He is suddenly a broken man. He must hide, but he has no place of concealment, he must run, but he has no destination. Ridicule has no place in a world where prudence and gravity are masters, and he knows, with a totally despairing certainty, that he has just wholly and completely enshrined himself as a fool.

 

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