The Annex Reviews, September 2003

9/26/03 ~ Slash, and Slash Again ~ Heart of Tribus (lildragon); Arrangements (Moniquill); For Lord and Land (Delilah DeSora); Of Unicorn Flesh (Kristene Sweep); Bloodraven, Chapters 1 - 3 (PL Nunn); Devotion, Chapters 1 and 2 (Bright Angel Aetherius); Tarnished Armor, Chapters 1 and 2 (Pluto); Delight (Katie Viecei); Kings Love (Mel Blue)

9/26/03

In these reviews I turn again to original slash stories, a longtime favorite of mine. Rare when I first started reviewing them -- a year or so back -- they've since multiplied, in part due to the popularity of yaoi and Japanese manga and anime series, but also, I think, to the writers themselves, many of whom are maturing and growing bored with the limitations of fanfic. Also, I think, from the feedback they've acquired on self- posting archives such as Fictionpress and slashfanfiction.com.

So slash... and slash again!

Heart of Tribus [B+/B]
Where found: Adultfanfiction.net
URL: http://adultfan.nexcess.net/aff/story.php?no=3629
Author: lildragon
Type: M/M, original slash, fantasy

Adultfanfiction.net has picked up the slash gauntlet where Fanfiction.net left off, allowing many writers to continue to post their fanfics and fantasies. Here's a slash ficlet described by the writer as "randomly thought up."

Imathaen is a (elvish?) dancer chosen to perform for "Kamkari, emperor of Zilgaldous" a name which might make some with less self-control than I break out into giggles. Struck by the young emperor's beauty, the dancer sneaks into his bedchamber later that night even though "laying with royalty is punishable by death." For dancers I guess, or males? And is it laying or lying? Overcome with feelings of slashy lust, he ties the emporer hand and foot to the posts of his bed; but surprisingly, the emporer isn't too upset at this. You see, no one ever treats the emporer like a normal human being, only like royalty... though why he would think being treated like a normal human being includes being tied to the bedposts, I don't know.

For a light read this was OK; it was pretty literate for a piece made up on the fly, the first-person tone was engaging, and it was easy to digest. But it didn't go anywhere, and it was pretty silly. If it lost me at any point, it's that an emporer's bedchamber would be better protected from break-ins of this sort. Wouldn't he have bodyguards?

Arrangements [A-]
Where found: Fictionpress.net
URL: http://www.fictionpress.com/read.php?storyid=1279416
Author: Moniquill
Type: M/M, bond, original slash, fantasy

Moniquill is a prolific original slash writer who used to post on the FanFiction.com site before the purge; now she's switched over to its sister site, Fictionpress, ostensibly for original fiction rated R and below. I say ostensibly because there is still plenty of kink and smut available if you're willing to sift. She impressed me on the former site, so finding she had jumped ships, I decided to read some more of her work.

"Arrangements" is a continuing slash serial about young Lord Giles and the elven slave he buys to share his bed. As such, it's a classic power differential setup. The elf, a civilized being who's had some hard luck, has a reputation for savaging his owners and Giles thinks he can tame him, so he ties him to the bedpost and comes up with some novel torments... knowing elves are allergic to silver, he puts a silver earring on him. However, things are not as dark or serious as such a setup would imply... as serious as they would be in, say, a Francesca Bathory slash story. Lord Giles is a youthful and light-hearted sort, characteristics rather out of place for a slave owner, and after a while the elf decides to be light-hearted too -- tired of being tied to the bedposts (a repeated theme in these stories) he decides to become more aggressive with his master. This turnabout is portrayed in a teasing, whimsical way that, to my taste, is out of place for a slave fic, which should by its nature be more serious. And as usual for slashy slave fics, there's nary an explanation of how or why this pseudo-Renaissance society maintains slavery as a societal institution.

This was light, fluffy slash reading (think a well- beaten meringue, flavored with lemon) and Moniquill writes it well. But I wish there had been more originality and maturity. In a genre this young, with such young writers, those are qualities difficult to find.

For Lord and Land [A/A-]
Where found: For Lord and Land
URL: http://angelfire.com/dragon/delilah/forlordandland.html
Author: Delilah DeSora
Type: M/M, original slash, fantasy

This author has come up with a story that treads the middle ground between yaoi and original slash, with excellent visual writing that made me imagine it as a lushly detailed manga or animated series. The land of Ardae is ruled by the red-haired, twinkish young Emporer Ardel Aidan, also known as the Dragon, a being of absolute sovereignty who has an elemental, inherited control over fire that makes him a living God in the eyes of his people. Unfortunately, he's nuttier than a fruitcake and prone to irrational hissyfits. To fix things his loyal knights decide he needs the (male) reincarnation of the Leviathan, who has elemental control over water, to cool him down and stabilize him. Two young knights, Cian and Dante, are dispatched to search for this individual, who will be the Emporer's bed-slave as well as his nurse. Things are complicated when one of the knights turns out to be the Leviathan they're searching for, and is not thrilled at all about serving as a slave. Meanwhile the Emporer is having his psyche twisted by an underling who has control over the element of Air.

This all adds up to a very interesting plot which was one of the busiest and most ambitious I've seen in this genre, with a derivative but fascinating worldsetting, a number of well-defined characters, and plenty of slashiness including slavery, semiconsensual M/M sex, teasing flirtations, and tearful confessions. It succeeded in most of what it did, but I would have liked to have seen, as in Moniquill story above, less restraint and more maturity; also, the plot seemed to rush by at times, with critical events happening off- stage (such as the two heroes fighting off the treacherous underling) while other plot points were not explored at all. In fact these five chapters could have easily been ten. I also grew annoyed at how the author broke down the sexual roles between males into male and female, doer and done by, even though she was careful to point out the lovers do switch off on occasion. Many slash writers do this, and it seems to be a growing trend -- a replay of the uke-seme rules from manga, I'm afraid.

However, for an original slash fantasy, there was lots and lots of promise here, particularly in how the author handled her characters. I encourage her to continue writing in the universe she has created and watch the tendency to skim over and rush her plots.

Of Unicorn Flesh [A]
Where found: Yaoishrine
URL: http://www.yaoishrine.com/fictions/ofunicornflesh.htm
Author: Kristene Sweep
Type: M/M, original slash, myth

Here's a slash fairy tale which is interesting because instead of being based on real-world elements it is based on fictional ones, the unspoken laws of slash. An unwanted foundling is given over to the church of his village to be raised, his unluck inspiring rejection and derision from the other children. One day he has enough of it and runs off into the Forest of Monsters, where he meets a dragon who tells him what he must do to never be unwanted again. Unfortunately, it turns him into a stereotypical yaoi hero ("sturdy arms, a tapered waist, high legs, and the frame of youth. His hair swept over his broad shoulders in the color of a polished blade, smooth and sleek. His skin glowed in the sunlight as if dusted with silver... his eyes were like blue pearls even from thirty feet away") who is wanted, for sexual use, by everyone he meets, which leads to him being serially enslaved, and serially raped, by the powerful males of his kingdom all the way on up to the emporer.

This was an interesting take on yaoi cliches that came out, I think, more slyly amusing than the author meant it to be, at least to my sensibilities. It could almost have been a cruel alternate-world fairy tale in the "be careful what you wish for" vein, though it ended on a confusing note that seemed thrown in simply to bring the story to a close. But what came before was a smart, lovely hoot.

Bloodraven, Chapters 1, 2, 3 [A+]
Where found: Bishonenworks
URL: http://www.bishonenworks.com/ogre1.htm
Author: PL Nunn
Type: M/m, ncon, rape, original slash, slave, fantasy, viol, extrm

This story was one of the more... extreme let's say, featuring intense interspecies rape and tons of violence and cruelty. And as such the author goes way, way out with it, taking it to an orbit I never thought possible, at least until I read it.

The author is, first of all, somewhat of a prodigy in yaoi circles, a self-published writer with an astonishing number of fanfic and original stories to her credit. Plus, she's a helluva artist as well, one of the finest manga/doujinshi amateurs out there, featuring on her website dozens upon dozens of pretty yaoi boys in athletic X-rated contortions. (Thank God for Poser software.) She also has her own style, halfway between the traditional bug-eyed manga and the tighter, more realistic 'American' look with its broad shoulders and six-packs.

But back to the fiction. "Bloodraven" is an ongoing multichapter serial (and they are long chapters) set in a fantasy world of Medieval kingdoms, druidic forests, ogres, and half-ogres. The hero is Yhalen, a guilt- ridden teen who gets captured by some orgrish raiders and is promptly made into a slave of them, and it ain't pretty. For one thing, they've got *fingers* the size of baseball bats, so you can imagine what their dicks can do:

The one with the earrings leaned over, grinning and tipped the mouth of his wineskin up, dribbling strong red wine over Yhalen's thighs. It dribbled over his balls and down the short channel to his anus, making the cuts sting and his ball shrink. The one at his bottom laughed and smeared his big finger in the wine, then pressed the tip of it against Yhalen's opening. It was thicker than Yhalen's penis engorged and considerably longer. The nail was blunt, but ragged and tore flesh as the ogre twisted it into Yhalen's resisting body.

The wine lubricated nothing so well as the thick blood that began to flow, hot and stinging down Yhalen's spine and across his thighs.

He did scream then, when the bulge of the knuckle threatened to split already torn muscle. Cried and cursed and spasmodically tried to jerk his body away from the intrusion and failed. And hopelessly, miserably failed. He did nothing but scrape his arms and hands against the bark of the tree and amuse the gathered monsters.

Fortunately the hero has a magical ability that lets him heal quickly, but there's plenty of sheer terror as he's sexually molested and carted through the woods to their camp, where Bloodraven, the physically smaller but more intelligent half-ogre leader of the tribe, claims him as his prize. The depiction of slavery was pretty raw compared to most yaoi stories: there's plenty of pain and discomfort, not to mention fear. It's also the real thing, the BDSM and D/s elements lacking, and candid in its depiction of feces, blood, sweat, and dirt. The story was more of a situational one than one with a strong plot or characters, but what an intense situation it was, and it gets its A+ rating from its sheer appetite in depicting some very dark aspects of fantasy.

If there was a flaw in the story, it's that the first 1,800 words or so were almost unintelligible. Something about Yhalen cavorting in the forest with friends who initiate a lover's triangle that is interrupted by the ogres, causing Yhalen guilt for the rest of the story. It could, and probably should, be skipped, for the reader to pick up the story at the ogre-capture part.

Highly recommended if you like abusive yaoi stories, or wild and intense fantasy tales.

Devotion, Chapters 1 and 2 [B+]
Where found: The Celestial Noodle House
URL: http://home.earthlink.net/~aetherius/e_main.htm
Author: Bright Angel Aetherius
Type: M/M, original slash, slave, fantasy, nosex

This story was one of the more typically yaoi ones, as such followed one of the more popular slashy plotlines: young guy is sold as a slave and has to adjust to his new situation. Not escape or protest: adjust. I've seen it used dozens of times, in fanfics ranging from Gundam Wing to N'sync, and on the Nifty Archives as well. It obviously strikes a chord in both gay men and straight women.

The author tackles it in typical yaoi style, first of all setting up her world: Trivea, a decadent city with a distinct upper class and underclass, ruled by the mysterious nobles who live on the guarded isle of Sefiros. The nobles periodically swoop down on the city to buy attractive pleasure slaves, and therein lies our story. Cyan (a recurring name in yaoi stories) is the fey, useless son of a wealthy family who is sold by his own father to pay off a bad debt, and so off he goes into slavehood, purchased by a lord who takes him to the island. There he's put into a male harem of sorts with other yaoi boys, who are all thoroughly, and tediously at times, described by their skin, hair and eye color and typical mode of dress. This introductory part goes on too long maybe, and the reactions of the harem slaves to each other are somewhat junior high (and probably inspired by some junior high anime) but there's intiguing possibilities in the idea of male whores putting up with each other the best they can. However, like the Moniquill story, it does all come across as juvenile; the nastier aspects aren't touched on, and there's plenty of tears and helpless whinging from the protagonist, who acts all of nine or ten. Another annoyance I found was that the story's writing style was too long on the visual descriptions and too short on the action. I found myself skipping over the lengthy summations of halls and rooms, trying to get to a place where the characters are actually advancing the plot.

In sum, how much you'd like this depends on your tolerance for fluffy, well-sweetened yaoi stories. Whatever the meringue level, though, it was promising in that it introduced some interesting characters and the potential conflicts among them.

Tarnished Armor, Chapters 1 and 2 [A]
Where found: Chrysanthemum Vows
URL: http://thatdamncat.com/yaoi/armor
Author: Liz Cheng
Type: M/M, original slash, fantasy, nosex

Liz Cheng (aka Pluto) is another multitalented writer/artist. She started out in the anime fandoms but has also branched out into Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, and original slash.

This story was in fact more slash than yaoi, and more mainstream fic than slash, in the style of Ellen Kushner and the more modern pro-gay fantasy writers. Marcus is an ordinary soldier in a Medieval world who is sent on a mission to serve Geran, the King of Mirivir. He's wowed by the exotic splendor and beauty of the court, and by the equally exotic and beautiful boy-king himself ("...like a dragon, golden and exotic, with sleek-sharp features that made him look neither young nor old. His hair was no one color, but mottled and streaked like a wild animal's mane in varying shades of gold and copper and brown. It was swept back away from his face and tumbled just past his shoulders") who, in addition to his slashy attributes, is also an Ifuldrin, a sacred dragon warrior of sorts. Their story is told in the form of flashbacks from a present day viewpoint when it's revealed things have not gone down well between the pair: an adult Geran has invaded Marcus' kingdom and captured him in battle.

The story was smoothly and professionally written and I enjoyed reading it, particularly the teasing dialogue between Geran and Marcus. Their relationship was at the center of the story, and its progress was affectionate and believable. Overall, though, the story was trying very hard to be mainstream fiction and not slash. As such, most of the colorful and histrionic elements were missing, and it was perhaps too boring. Marcus goes on and on about his low birth, his physical plainness, and his unworthiness to be a companion to the beautiful and noble boy-king; it got to be tiring. Since we only heard what he had to say, I really had no idea why the king was enthralled with this guy. At several points he even wants to break off the relationship, only to be pushed into continuing it by the commander of the diplomatic mission, in the hopes he'll influence the king to look more favorably on their country; it's also suggested that he whore himself for the mission's good. But while this part was written well, it just didn't have the vicious sting and emotional impact it could have. In sum, the main character was a lump, bound by duty, with few attractive qualities, and the intriguing one, the king, wasn't given the words he needed to shine (such as why he seems to be so perenially unhappy) at least not in these chapters, where we're stuck with Dullboy.

The story also lacked the detail and color, both emotional and descriptive, that one gets from yaoi and slash; I suspect it was edited out for space or 'professional' reasons, which is too bad, as some wildness might have livened things up.

I can't rate the story badly, however, because as I said it was an entertaining read, and I'm motivated to read the rest of the chapters. But I think the writer put too many chains on herself.

Delight [A]
Where found: Silverlake
URL: http://silverlake.imjustsayin.net/katiev- delight.html
Author: Katie Viecei
Type: M/M/M, slave, Narnia fanfic

Despite writing a series that could be considered the "Harry Potter" of its day Narnia creator C.S. Lewis (fellow Inkling to J.R.R. Tolkien) hasn't received much attention in slash circles. This is too bad, because as a longtime fan of Narnia I would say it is supremely slashable, with more than a few opportunities for angst, h/c, kink, mind control and especially fur (the many sentient animal and mythological creature characters.) It even has two of slash's indisputably vital fandom ingredients: a somewhat Medieval, magic-using worldsetting (with one of its societies a slave-based Middle Eastern one) and a television miniseries with young, attractive stars that is available on VHS and DVD. Furthermore, it is soon to gain a third: a movie is in the works, inspired by the success of the Potter books, and there is also talk of the books' publishing house commisioning new works in the series and even daring to excise Lewis' Christian references from the originals. The stage seems to be slowly setting itself for a Tolkien-style fanfic explosion in which both media and literary material are referenced. (Lewis' other works are slashable as well, particularly his "Out of the Silent Planet" trilogy with its morally upright, hapless male protagonist, exotic landscapes, and psychologically intimate encounters with other species.)

This story was found on the Silverlake multifandom site where the author has posted other Narnia fanfics. It picks up on the Calormen motif of the books, Calormen being the vaguely Persian, heathen, expansionist slave- owning country to the south the Narnian characters ocasionally clash with. It takes place sometime in the first book, in the untold history when the four Pevensie siblings (Peter, Susan, Edmund, and Lucy, for those who don't remember) are reigning as adult kings and queens of Narnia. Here they attend a state fuction in Calormen at which Queen Susan is being wooed by the Tisroc's (Calormenese for Emporer) son. Edmund is separated from the others on this mission and provided entertainment in the form of two male slaves, doing things Lewis, like Tolkien, would be scandalized at:

Edmund took the time to examine them both, for they were wonderful to look at, well-formed and slender, both obviously chosen for their beauty. They were both clean shaven, in contrast to the bearded Tarkhaans, which might have been the mark of a slave, and their chests were bereft of hair. Edmund suspected they had been shaven there as well, and wondered how far that went. When he looked at them, they met his gaze his moment, then looked away in a obviously learned manner. Though they might have been trained to appear so, they seemed kind and good, and he was cheered that such men existed in Calormen.

While his mind was content with his company, his body was restless, and as his gaze dropped to Tashda's groin, he could see the erection there, pressing against the thin silk of his trousers. Sensing the attention, Tashda shifted and started working at the ties of the pants, finally standing so as to be able to remove them entirely. He dropped them by Arleesh who had also shed his clothing, and knelt again. Edmund looked at the now revealed cock with open curiosity and not a little lust. It was surrounded by well-kept dark hair and covered in the same fine golden powder as the rest of the man, which made the veins on it stand out. His own penis stirred at such a sight, and Tashda immediately moved forward and straddled his thighs.

The "Delight" of the title refers to Turkish Delight, a sweet Edmund has a weakness for, well described in "The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe." The character of Edmund has a special attraction for Narnfic writers; he's the Boromir of the bunch, the morally conflicted one who tries to do good and fails, and therefore he gets all the interesting plotlines. (The author has also written a very dark Narnia hetfic, "The Traitor, the Witch, and the Lovers" posted on the same site, which I definitely recommend as a NC-17 take on what would have happened to the Pevensies if the White Witch had won.)

This author has done a very good job in capturing the flavor, if not quite the exact tone, of Lewis' prose, bringing it into the more adult realm of slash if not that of Lewis' adult fiction. The story was little more than a sexual encounter, yet the pastiche was handled very well, particularly in its use of lush, descriptive language. Worth a look for those who have fond memories of Narnia and wouldn't mind seeing it in a different way.

Kings Love [A]
Where found: Mel Blue's Narnia Fanfic
URL: http://www.melblue.com/narnia.html
Author: Mel Blue
Type: M/m, slave, Narnia fanfic, nosex

If C. S. Lewis wrote angsty slash it would read just like this.

The writer of this story has taken an incident from the third book of the series, "The Voyage of the Dawn Treader," and deftly inserted her own plot between the lines. To summarize, Edmund and Lucy Pevensie, and their odious cousin Eustace, have been called into Narnia to aid Prince Caspian in his exploration of the Eastern Sea. Edmund is already haunted by an encounter from the previous book (or rather, inserted by the author between the lines of the previous book) where he witnessed his older brother Peter and Caspian sharing a same-sex romantic encounter:

After their battle with the Telmarines, there had been a great feast, and it was after this feast that he had seen Caspian and Peter kissing in the moonlight. He had not thought of that moment for a long time and now he felt a slight flush rise in his cheeks as the pictures replayed in his mind. He still did not understand why Aslan had wanted him to see it, and he still did not understand why he had felt so horrified at the time. At school, he had sometimes glimpsed similar incidents and in Narnia those sorts of relationships did not meet with the same disapproval as they did in his own world.

In a fascinating twist this incident has apparantly been approved by Aslan, the all-powerful god/lion ruler of this world: could he have been pro-gay? This only adds fuel to the fire of the story's main plot, which involves the heroes being captured by slavers during a layover in the Lone Isles. This being slash the author addresses the possibilities which Lewis did not:

The merchant immediately yanked on the rope and Edmund fell forward, his face smashing into the merchant's chest. He struggled for a moment, but then a strong arm came around his waist and tightened, holding him in place. Panic suddenly ripped through Edmund and he was gasping for air, trying to clear his head, when a hand was placed under his chin and his face was roughly forced up.

It was for only a moment that he saw the merchants face, because the next thing he knew the merchant had lowered his head and his lips met Edmund's, pressing on them painfully. Edmund froze in shock, and in that moment the Calormene forced Edmund's lips open and pushed his tongue deep into Edmund's mouth.

The rest of the story is taken up with both Edmund's reaction to the incident and his growing attraction to Caspian, an attraction that isn't acted on until the last few paragraphs. No sex here (only some heated kissing) but ohmigosh, it was very well done. A mature spin on a children's story while keeping faithful to the tone of the originals; now THAT is very hard to do, but the author pulled it off.