Part 2 - Gerry
I'm really not what I seem, you know. My whole life, since puberty, has been a lie in one way or another. I remember everything about it so clearly, right from when it started. It's so clear it seems like it just happened.
For me, puberty came late, and when it came, too many things came along with it, too much happened, far too fast for me to handle. I was barely thirteen years old when it started. Mom had just gotten divorced from Daddy. Steven had left home so he could go to University and Dennis had gone into the navy. Mom and Daddy had sold the old house when they split up, which meant that Mom and I had to move into an apartment. So, on top of puberty, my life was going through major upheavals and there were tons of surprises clobbering me that I wasn't prepared for.
Then one day I was helping Mom wash the walls in the kitchen of the old house, doing the final cleanup after we'd moved out. While I was doing that, I was thinking about some of the people in our new neighbourhood. Now, I hadn't dared to say anything to anyone, but I already knew that I liked girls a lot more than guys. So there I was, standing on a chair, reaching up above my head, washing a wall, but my mind was on girls.
Actually, I think right then my thoughts were about this hot chick who lived one floor above us in our new apartment building. That's when I felt this horrible pain in my lower stomach. It was so bad it was almost enough to take my breath away. Then all of a sudden, the pain got a lot worse, so much worse that I just keeled over and fell to the floor.
"Gerry? Gerry, what's wrong?" Mom demanded as she rushed over to me.
"Oh God, it hurts." I moaned, both of my hands grabbing at my groin.
I remember Mom asking me to move my hands and then I think she touched me. I know I screamed about then and I guess I passed out. The next thing I knew I was waking up in the hospital and Mom was sitting on a chair beside the bed. I must have made some sound, because she lifted her head and looked at me. She'd been crying. I could see that her eyes were red and there were tear streaks on her face.
"Hi, Sweetheart." She whispered as she got up quickly and moved to my side. "Are you feeling a little bit better now?"
Her hand reached out and stroked my forehead. I didn't know what to say. My lower belly still hurt, but now it was a strange feeling, a dull, numbed down, throbbing pain that seemed to pulse and flair a bit in time to my heartbeat.
"I guess? It still hurts some." I managed to croak, then I realised how bad my mouth tasted. "Euch, I need to brush my teeth. My mouth tastes horrid"
"Well, that we can do something about." She managed a smile and I saw her reach for a glass of water with a straw in it.
I tried to sit up and heard her start to say something to tell me not to move, then I was out like a light.
The next time I awoke I was still in bed, but this time I couldn't move. It was dark, very dark. I was hurting too, and it hurt a lot! Everything from my chest to my knees seemed to be on fire. I screamed.
That was the last time I ever saw Daddy. Suddenly there was a light. Then he was at my side, bending over and asking me something. Suddenly he was being pushed away by nurses and doctors as they crowded around my bed. I faded out, then I woke up for a few seconds as I felt someone lift the covers from my tummy. That felt strange, something wasn't right and I didn't understand what it was. I tried to sit up, but something was holding me down. I think I struggled, but I'm not sure.
When I awoke the next time, the pain was almost gone. I was in a room with a window and the sun was shining. Mom was there and we were talking. I can't remember what she said for sure, but I know it was about sex and the difference between men and women. She had a book that she was trying to show me, but I couldn't seem to see it clearly. Then a nurse came in and Mom had to leave. The nurse did something to the plastic tube that ran to a needle in one of my arms, then everything seemed to fade away once more.
There were several more times when I saw Mom and we'd talk for a while, then I'd just seem to fade out and wake up by myself.
Then one afternoon, everything came to a head and my life changed forever. I was still in the hospital and I was still in bed, in a tiny room by myself, but I felt better somehow. My head was clear and I felt good. For once I wasn't tied down to the bed and I only saw one tube in my arm but I wasn't sure if there were any anywhere else. I tried to sit up, but as soon as I did, I got woozy and light headed.
Someone must have told me that I had a button to call a nurse if I needed one. I was looking for it when the door opened and a pretty nurse came into the room.
"Well. Hello, Gerry, and how are we today?" She smiled. "My name is Emily Simmons and I'm your afternoon care giver, but you'd better call me Miss Simmons if anyone else might hear you, okay?"
I just stared at her for several seconds, feeling completely weird. She was beautiful and for some reason I wanted to please her, but I was thinking about sex in a different way than I ever had before. It was weird, I knew I was a girl and yet this woman was making my whole body tingle and somehow I wanted something I didn't understand. My head was still telling me I was being weird. I should like guys, not girls, but this woman was different in some way and I was drawn to her.
"Gerry, are you okay?" She asked.
"I . . . I . . . I feel weird." I tried to speak, but I could barely manage to whisper.
"Well, that's not surprising." She smiled and I felt myself tingle.
I liked her smile and I wanted her to do it again. I was going to try to sit up, but was afraid to because of the way I'd felt before when I'd tried.
"I'm thirsty." I sighed.
"Well, since I just happen to have something for you to drink, I can help with that." She lifted a glass and brought a straw to my lips. "You shouldn't talk too much now though."
"Mmm Hmm." I muttered around the straw, not daring to open my mouth for fear she'd take it away.
That water tasted so good, it was wonderful, but after only a few sips, I felt full, almost as if my stomach was bloated.
"I think that's enough for now. Don't move and don't try to sit up, I'll be right back." She smiled again as she slipped the straw from my lips and set the glass down on the little rolling table at my bedside. "I'm going to have to call your doctor to tell her that you're doing so well and I'll let your Mom know that you seem to be feeling much better. Then I'll be back until someone else comes, okay?"
I tried to nod my head, but even that made me feel dizzy.
"Just rest. I'll be back. Cross my heart." She smiled again and I felt another thrill run through me, then she went out the door, closing it behind her.
I leaned back and rested, trying to think about what could be wrong with me, but not really worried in any way. My body felt strange, as if I was floating. Then I realised that my whole lower belly itched and felt constricted somehow. I was frowning and wondering about that, when I heard voices outside my door.
"Yes, Doctor. Quite reasonable and reacting as normally as can be expected." A voice that sounded very much like the nurse said. "By all signs, she's alert and responsive."
Another woman's voice murmured for a moment, then I heard the door rattle as someone put their hand on the doorknob.
"All right, Doctor. I'll be at the nurses' station." 'My' nurse's voice said.
The door opened and a short, heavy set woman with a dark complexion came inside, closing the door behind her. She was wearing a white doctor's gown, had a stethoscope around her neck and looked very 'doctorish' to me.
"Hello, Gerry. I'm Dr. Wentworth and I've been responsible for your health since you came to our clinic." She smiled, but it was a fake smile, a tired smile. "I'm happy to see you awake and alert. Do you feel okay?"
"I'm itchy." I managed to croak and pointed at my groin. "Down there."
"I see." She nodded. "We should be able to reduce that itch for you quite soon."
She made a note on a pad she was carrying, then her eyes lifted to meet mine again.
"Any other complaints?"
"I get dizzy, when I move my head."
"Well, you've been lying there for quite some time. I think that will cure itself. Now, how much of your mother's explanation of what has happened to you do you recall?"
"Mom? I dunno, why?" I could only whisper.
"You don't remember?"
"I remember her talking, but . . ." My voice faded right out and when I tried to shake my head to let her know that I didn't remember, but I almost threw up.
"Easy, easy. There's no rush. I don't want you to make yourself ill now." She said instantly reaching out a hand to lay it gently on my forehead.
She spent a few more minutes with me, checking my pulse and my temperature, then she lifted the blankets on the bed from the side, but in such a way that I couldn't see anything. I could feel her hand when she did something that relieved the itch a lot, however, it felt as if I was almost numb, either that or she was touching me through cloth or something. When she put the blankets down and was leaving the room, she gave me a very strange look, almost as if she felt sorry for me.
She left me alone then and closed the door as she went out. Her action with the blankets, then the look she had given me at the last instant had made me wonder exactly what was going on though, so I decided I had to try to see. Moving slowly, I lifted my head and then lifted the blankets.
There was a bandage of sorts over my whole lower belly area which looked strangely swollen. It certainly didn't match my body contours as I remembered them.
Holding my head still, I folded the blankets back, then used one hand to touch myself lightly. Strangely, I had feeling in the swelling, not much, but I could feel something through the bandages. There was definitely feeling there, especially near the bottom of the swelling, close to the opening of my . . . Ohmigod, my vagina!
Was something wrong with my pussy?
Why was it swollen like that?
This was wrong!
I ran my fingers back along the bandages, back toward my navel. It felt strangely like a small shaft. Like a . . . a penis?
I screamed as I flopped back on the bed, then I think I blacked out again.
It seems that when I was thinking about that hot chick as I was washing walls, I'd gotten my very first hard-on. Unfortunately, my penis and my testes developed subcutaneously, inside my belly, under the skin in some sort of a pocket, perhaps an extension of the prepuce of my clitoris. Now since a man's penis develops in the same general area as the clitoris develops on a woman, that's what Mom and I had thought it was, an oversized clitoris. Up until the day I got a hard-on, all that was protruding was the tip of the head of my penis.
In actual fact, my penis must have been literally folded in half; the base was pretty well where it belonged and the head was where the clitoris would normally be, in other words, right above the base. The shaft had started to grow inside me and folded in half as it developed. That's because it couldn't grow outward since there was a thin skin tie just back of the glans of the penis joining it to the labia minor of my vulva.
When I got a hard-on that day as I was thinking of that chick, my penis was trying to tear its way out through the outer skin. That's what had hurt so badly. My penis was jammed in tight and the skin of my lower belly was being stretched to the limit, so everything hurt at once.
In the hospital, they drugged me up to ease the pain. Then luckily there was a doctor there who was willing to go the extra mile. She didn't know what was connected where, but she knew that if I'd had one hard-on, I'd have more. With that in mind, she managed to fish my dick out of hiding and stitched up any cuts she'd had to make. Then they had to keep me immobile and sedated until I was healed enough mentally that I wouldn't hurt myself physically.
Let's face it, the skin that had formed on my penis while it was inside the pocket in my body wasn't really true skin. It was what the doctor called 'proto-skin' and was way too tender to be handled. That meant they had to protect that until it toughened. In fact I had protective bandages around my dick for a month after I left the hospital.
By the time I'd woken up and investigated under the blankets, they knew that I was a true hermaphrodite with part male organs and part female organs, all muddled together inside my body like a jigsaw puzzle. It turns out that as a woman, I was very incomplete. I have a vagina, ovaries, but incomplete fallopian tubes and I don't have either a uterus or a clitoris. As a man, I'd be slightly incomplete as well. I don't have two testes, only one and it's stunted. My prostate gland is half the normal size of a man's and my penis is rather short and stubby. My urethra doesn't connect to the penis like a man's would, so I pee like a woman, but I have to use my hand to make sure my dick is out of the way of the stream.
It took years and many, many hours of analysis for me to get my head straightened around to accept the idea that I was a hermaphrodite. Then even more years and more hours to decide that I liked being one. Up until then, I knew that a very expensive operation could shift me either way. I just couldn't decide which way to go.
I knew that I loved women, so my genetic makeup is mostly male oriented. However my female hormones kicked in first, so I have a female body contour and female attitudes. Then when the male hormones did kick in, it was like some of the male hormones got cancelled out by the female hormones and vice versa. For instance, my breasts stayed the same size as they were when I was twelve, well until this year when I wanted to lactate and took hormones. I suppose if you regard my dick as an over sized clitoris, I'm still a woman in most ways and after I tried it, I found that I loved to take a nice sized dick in my vagina and have sex the way a regular woman does, but I have a dual orgasm.
It's been really nice to have a dick and to be able to use it on my woman friends too though. A lot of them get off on the fact that I was half and half, well most of the 'bi' women that is. Most of the so called 'real' lesbians think I'm a freak, but it usually blows them away when I agree with them. I know I'm not normal, so I admit I'm a freak, but I love it.
All in all, my whole genital area is a mess, but I like to think I have the best of both worlds. I can screw a woman or get screwed by a man, but I never have to worry about getting pregnant.
Unfortunately, there really isn't a place in society for someone like me because I am a freak. One doctor explained that when I was conceived, my body probably started out as twins, but one twin absorbed most of the other, so only parts of each twin's genitals survived.
After telling Kelly the whole story, Gerry sighed deeply, then lay silent and still for several moments, her eyes leaking silent tears. Kelly leaned over and kissed her cheek, then hugged her from the side as they lay on the bed, both quietly reviewing their own thoughts.
Finally, Gerry raised her head. "Now you know. I'm a hermaphrodite who's been lying and telling her whole family that she's a lesbian. The only living person to know about me is Mom. Well, other than the fact that now you know too."
"So?" Kelly's eyes twinkled. "You have what every woman wants, a cock to call her very own."
Gerry just stared at her for a minute, then began to giggle like a kid.
"Too bad I can't use it on myself." She snorted through laughter after a moment. "It won't bend enough to go where I'd want it to go when it's hard enough to do anything."
That set them both off again. After both of them had calmed down, Kelly smiled.
"So, when do I get to see this penis that was rescued from a fate worse that death?" She asked quietly.
"A fate worse than death?" Gerry looked at her as wide eyed as a child.
"Well, sure, just think about. Confined in dark, hot isolation for thirteen years, that's a heavy prison term." Kelly grinned.
"Actually, I'd rather think of it as a fourteen-year pregnancy before my dick was born." Gerry grinned. "Nine months in Mom's belly and the rest in mine."
Both of them were laughing again, but Gerry stayed in the same position, not letting Kelly see anything. Finally she looked at Kelly seriously.
"Look, Kelly. Just a couple of hours ago you were telling me that you were frustrated because Steven wasn't around. I fiddled around with you while Jen was play nursing on your breasts and I can live with that, because . . ." Gerry paused and sighed. "Well I could probably justify that as women playing around to Steven and not real sex. Since you didn't know about my dick, I can even make an excuse myself. Now though, I'm not so sure. I think you'd want to try it out and I'm not too sure that I could stop myself if we started anything."
"So what, you said yourself that you were sterile. All we'd be doing would be using your dick as a living dildo."
"No, I said I had no uterus and no connection between my ovaries and my vagina, so I can't get pregnant. But, Jen is really my child. I have a DNA test to prove it."
"Are you telling me that with one ball, you got your girlfriend pregnant?" Kelly looked at Gerry in amazement.
"That's exactly what I'm telling you. I thought I was sterile too, so when Janet got pregnant, I accused her of playing around on me. She swore up and down that she hadn't had sex of any kind with anyone else and insisted that I get tested." Gerry sighed. "I do seem to be producing some sperm, not a lot, but what that one ball does produce must be potent. You see, after Jen was born, we had a DNA test done. The day after the test came back showing a match to my genes, Janet split and took everything we had that she could take."
"That was a bit bloody rough of her." Kelly sympathised.
"Oh, I don't know, I still love her in spite of what she did. After all, she did get a shitty deal out of it. Getting pregnant cost her a great job and she didn't want kids."
"She didn't want Jen?"
"Nope, she wanted to put her up for adoption. I was the one who insisted on keeping her. Heck, I even took hormone shots so I could nurse her myself."
"I was going to ask about that." Kelly smiled. "I didn't know you could do that."
"Oh yeah. The hormone is called prolactin. It's a hormone that's supposed to automatically kick in when a woman gives birth, but some women need a booster shot to get started. I got the boost at first and now I just take a pill twice a day to keep on producing milk." Gerry explained. "I thought I mentioned that when I started taking prolactin, I developed my hooters."
"So, you're on female hormones to produce milk and they've made your breasts increase in size?"
"Yeah, so?"
"Well, since your body was in a delicate balance before, I'll bet you can't even get a really heavy duty hard-on, let alone produce any sperm now." Kelly laughed.
"Huh, why do you think I'm laying on my belly." Gerry snorted. "I'm laying on the hardest hard-on I've ever had. Let's be honest, I've had the hots for you since Steve first brought you home with him to meet the family. I'd just turned twelve and I was so jealous of him that I became a real bitch around both of you."
"So, you want me?" Kelly whispered.
"Desperately." Gerry sighed. "Like I said, I fell in love with you years ago."
"Okay, what do you think of Steven, and I mean as a man, not as your brother?"
"Well, I think he's a hunk, but what has that got to do with anything?"
"Oh, I don't know?" Kelly grinned. "It's just that I've always had this fantasy of seeing him 'lay the pipe' to another woman while I watched. He's such a great lover that I'd love to see it from a spectator's point of view. Since you're his sister, it'd be incest as well and that would make it even hotter for me to watch."
She broke into laughter as Gerry squirmed.
"Ohh, that got to you, didn't it?" She crowed. "I think I know someone who would like to try a little brotherly love."
"Kelly, you're a bitch!" Gerry squeaked, then started to laugh in embarrassment.
"Yeah, but you think I'm a sexy bitch." Kelly laughed. "Besides, this is 'safe' incest. You can't get pregnant. The only one around here who can get pregnant is me. On top of that, even your DNA and Steven's would be so similar that anyone would have a hell of a hard time proving he wasn't the person who got me pregnant."
"Jeez, you're serious, aren't you?"
"Unh huh." She glanced at the clock and grinned. "It's five o'clock here. So that makes it eight o'clock in Toronto. I think Steven will be in his hotel room for the evening and I think he should have some input into this, don't you?"
"Shit, you're not going to phone him and ask him, are you?"
"Of course I am. After all, Steven and I are completely open with each other. Well, almost." She smiled, a rather devilish smile. "Sometimes we do choose our words rather carefully when we're discussing things though."
Gerry broke into laughter as Kelly dialled the phone.
"Hey, enough of that. Either be quiet or sneak out of the room. I need to talk to him as if I were in private and you can't hear. Otherwise he'll know we're setting him up."
"Shit, you are a conniving little bitch."
Kelly just grinned and held her finger to her lips to warn Gerry to be quiet as she waited for Steven to answer the phone. Then she heard it pick up and she winked at Gerry.
"Hi, Sweetheart. I was hoping to catch you in your room, Are you alone? Gerry got here today and the baby is a little darling, but I've got some questions I need to ask you about Gerry and . . . well, about us. The three of us."