© Copyright 2004 by silli_artie@hotmail.com
This work may not be reposted or redistributed without the prior
express written permission of the author.
A work of fiction, meant for adults. Read something else if you are
not an adult, or are offended by stories with sexual content. Then
again, if all you’re looking for is in-out, in-out, in-out, you
should probably read something else. I welcome constructive comments.
Enjoy.
This is another story of the Veil that separates the Worlds.
Tasha didn’t know whether to be amused, depressed, or disgusted. She sighed softly to herself and remembered what she’d been reading: impermanence, all is impermanence; this too shall pass.
Uncle Wes always did operate on his own schedule, she thought, even to dropping dead the week before Spring Break. That had dragged her mom, dad, and her off to the Northern part of the state for services. At least it had gotten her out of school early.
The preacher pretending to eulogize Uncle Wes called him as “John” again, and Tasha cringed. At fourteen she recognized hypocrisy all too well; anyone who knew her uncle called him either “Jack” or “Wes,” but never, ever “John.”
She chuckled to herself, attracting a nasty glance from her father. She was surprised Uncle Wes’s casket wasn’t moving around from him spinning inside it. Wes had always followed his own drummer; he never was one for organized religion as far as Tasha knew. Aunt Viv had argued strongly against religious services for her brother, but the rest of the family, lead by Tasha’s father, won out, insisting that Wes receive “the full rites and a proper Christian burial.” The phrase stuck in her throat.
It was hard to believe they were part of the same family, her father, Aunt Viv, Uncle Wes, Aunt Betty, and Uncle George. Viv and Wes seemed to have all the life, all the vibrancy. The rest were so ... narrow and stubborn.
Her parents had bristled at staying with Viv, but given the short notice she had the most room, and had welcomed them warmly. That had been a pleasant surprise to Tasha -- Viv greeted everyone warmly, openly. Viv was the only relative she’d met on this trip who didn’t treat her as a child. After all, even at fourteen, she was in her Junior year in High School, having skipped a few grades. She already had scholarships and college admissions lined up; her big choice was on how far away from home she wanted to run, and how soon.
Maybe that was it, she pondered. She was too much of a threat to adults, so they insisted on treating her even more like a child -- all except Aunt Viv.
Aunt Viv had given her a wonderful room to stay in, quiet and private. Viv had taken the time to speak to her, as an adult, and had shown concern for how she was doing in school, and especially how she was adapting to dealing with classmates who were older, at least physically.
Mercifully, the service ended. Outside the hall, another of her right-wing red-necked relatives, standing next to the preacher, accosted her. “And just what do you have to say for yourself, young lady?”
Tasha sighed and smiled. Compassion is the key, she reminded herself; decline to accept gifts of hostility.
“Uncle Wes was a good man,” she said, “May he be free from suffering. May he be at peace. May we all be free from suffering; may we all be at peace.”
The preacher erupted in enthusiasm, “Amen! You’re raising a good God-fearing child, Brother Wayman.” The preacher put a hand on Tasha’s dad’s shoulder. Her father grunted. Tasha smiled, wondering what the preacher would say if he knew her prayer was Buddhist.
Tasha felt a hand on her shoulder; she turned to see Viv behind her, smiling.
“Why don’t you ride home with me,” Viv said, “your parents have other things to discuss. We can meet up with them at the dinner tonight.”
Tasha gave her aunt a tight smile, then composed herself and turned to her parents. “Father, mother, may I please?” she asked meekly. Her father seemed stunned by her tone of voice; her mother smiled. Her father nodded his head.
Viv said, “We’ll see you at the hall at half past six then.”
Tasha turned to the preacher and opened her mouth. She paused -- compassion. She extended a hand, swallowed her venom, or most of it, and said, “Thank you for your words; you taught me a lot this morning.”
The preacher beamed as he shook Tasha’s hand. Tasha turned and left with Viv.
Halfway through the parking lot Viv asked softly, “How did you manage that without throwing up?”
Tasha giggled and replied, “I didn’t have any breakfast this morning, and now I need to wash my hands."
Viv laughed and put an arm around her niece’s shoulder.
Tasha said, “I don’t know how I can thank you for rescuing me. I don’t think I could have survived the rest of the day.”
Viv sighed. “I know I couldn’t. I thought it would give us an opportunity to chat.”
Tasha welcomed the opportunity to speak with an adult, as an adult. She had a few teachers she could talk to, but even that was rare. As for the high school administration, they didn’t know what to do with her. The so-called “counselors” were useless. She thought maybe Konrath, the English teacher, might be the one sending her the books. But that didn’t seem very likely after their last conversation. Tasha had been surprised and more than a little disappointed to scratch the surface and find yet another closet Baptist.
Tasha and Viv talked along the short drive back to Viv’s house. Once inside Viv suggested, “Why don’t you change into something comfortable while I start tea. We’ll have it in my study upstairs. Take your time.”
Tasha smiled at that. Aunt Viv’s study was a room that seemed to garner a great deal of discomfort and disfavor with her parents, making it all the more appealing to her.
Tasha went upstairs and got out of her somber dress. Not only was it somber, it made her look ten years old, she thought. She put on a comfortable pair of pants and a shirt. As she changed, she looked at herself in the mirror and sighed. Mental and physical maturity were two separate things. She laughed to herself at the thought -- her two separate things had quite a bit of maturing to do, barely filling her bra. But, looking at her mother, Viv, and her other female relatives, she was sure she’d catch up.
She took a leisurely stop in the bathroom before making her way to the corner room. The door was closed, so she knocked. From inside, Viv said, “Please join me.”
Tasha opened the door and stepped in. She was startled by the candlelight and the smell of incense. Viv had a small table in the middle of the room, with a large candle on it, and tea for the two of them. Viv waved her to the rocking chair.
Tasha sat eagerly, accepting the teacup and saucer Viv handed her.
“Thank you so much for treating me as a sentient being,” Tasha said.
“That’s quite all right my dear,” Viv replied, “We have quite a bit in common.”
As they enjoyed the tea, and the skies darkened and rain started outside, their conversation ranged far and wide. They talked about family. They talked about school. To Tasha’s surprise, Viv asked quite pointedly about her development and sexuality. Tasha responded as frankly as she could. The boys at the high school showed no interest in her, preferring her more physically mature classmates. That was fine with her. She remarked offhand that she’d had some quite enjoyable reading recently.
Viv smiled and said, “I’d hoped your French was up to it.”
Tasha was momentarily stunned. Her mystery book supplier had sent her quite a batch of French erotica a few months back. “You!” she stammered in surprise, “You’re the one sending me the books!”
Viv nodded her head. “Both Wes and I. I’m sure he’s proud of you, quoting one of his favorite Buddhist mantras to a fire-and-brimstone preacher.”
Even though she had been feeling so relaxed, Tasha now felt exhilarated. They talked about the books she’d gotten. They had started arriving about two years ago. At first her parents examined everything closely. Then, as more appeared in French, Tasha’s foreign language of choice, her parents gave up. It was almost a joke now -- a package with two or three books would arrive, bearing dust covers identifying them as being written in French. For the most part they were. Of course the cover which proclaimed “History of the War of the Roses” had been on a volume of erotic literature.
Tasha was so excited to be able to talk about the books. Viv steered the conversation to some of the more difficult volumes, those on Buddhism, and especially some slim but dense works on things Tibetan. Tasha was surprised when Viv started quizzing her about how she felt, especially the days around her period. Did she have any unusual experiences? Feelings in her hands and feet? Have things looked unusual? Especially after strong orgasms?
This last one was a bit disquieting to Tasha. She confessed to trying, but she wasn’t sure she had the knack yet. Viv laughed softly and told her it would come with practice. They both laughed for a while at that.
It was raining outside, and warm inside. Tasha sighed and smiled to her aunt.
Viv said, “Why don’t you close your eyes for a while and rest? Let me rock you.”
Tasha smiled and wiggled into the chair a bit as her aunt moved over next to her. She put a small throw over Tasha, and started rocking the chair gently. Tasha closed her eyes.
“That’s good,” Viv said softly, “you can relax now. We’re so safe and comfortable here. It’s warm and cozy, and the sound of the rain is so soothing. Breathe in slowly, and when you exhale, relax, just relax. That’s good. Feel the relaxation in your scalp and your forehead. Breathe in and exhale, spreading it to your cheeks, and feel your jaw loosening.”
Viv rocked her niece gently, slowly. She felt so relaxed herself; it was hard to keep from dropping into trance. But she had work to do. She’d seen it in her, felt it in her; Tasha had it, just as she and Wes had it. It just needed to be awakened.
She continued taking Tasha into trance. The harried events of the last few days, the tea, the incense, the sound of the rain, all helped to make it easier. Tasha was a good subject. Soon she tested the depth of Tasha’s hypnosis. Then Viv moved on to the real test.
“Tasha, straighten your arms for me, and let them hang over the arms of the chair. That’s good, dear. Now open your palms; you know how. Now take a deep slow breath for me. What do you feel in your palms?”
Tasha was floating in such a relaxed place, rocking back and forth, so content and so safe. As she breathed in she felt the cool tingle again. “It’s cool, and it tingles. I like it,” she said softly.
Viv sighed and smiled, letting her head hang forward for a moment. Yes. Still, she had to be careful, careful of her brother and the family. They were in the Bible Belt after all.
“Good, dear,” she told Tasha, “Now when you exhale, feel the tingle and the coolness spread through your body. Exhale slowly, and feel it spread.”
Tasha exhaled and felt the feeling fill her. The tingle went down her spine and her neck, down her arms, down her trunk. She especially felt it in her breasts and between her legs.
“Good,” Viv said, “draw it in as you inhale; feel it flow through you as you exhale.”
Viv worked with Tasha for a while, moving energy around. After a bit though, Tasha frowned and started moving uncomfortably in the chair.
“What’s wrong, dear?” Viv asked.
“I need to straighten my legs; things are blocked.”
Viv smiled; Tasha was good, recognizing that so early. She spread some cushions on the rug and helped Tasha to her back on the floor. Tasha sighed as she extended her legs. Viv moved to the floor, sitting at her head.
“Good dear, now let’s take another breath in, and feel the coolness in your hands and feet. Can you feel it in your feet?”
Tasha took another breath. It felt better now, legs straight. “Yes, but I miss the rocking.”
Viv smiled. “You can go back to the rocking any time you want.” She put her hands under Tasha’s head and started rocking her head slightly from side to side. “I’ve got you, and you’re rocking again, so safe. And with every breath, the coolness flows through your body, and you relax more and more, and go deeper and deeper.”
Tasha was back rocking again; it felt so good. The coolness spread through her and she relaxed with a deep sigh.
Viv was a little surprised at how much Tasha relaxed; she saw her niece’s shoulders drop, and her feet drop a little further apart. Viv sighed. She’d develop what she could today, and play it by ear. Then she chuckled with a thought. That would work -- that would probably work just fine, and solve a number of problems.
She spent the next hour working with Tasha in trance, deepening her connection to her palms and her feet. Under questioning, Viv was surprised when Tasha reported sensation at her third eye, and then suddenly that her father was very angry. This upset Tasha, and it took Viv a while to calm her again. Once she’d calmed down, Viv gave Tasha some suggestions to help her through the trauma of awakening, and through the difficulties of teenage life in general. Then she took her deeper, and left her to rest and awaken on her own.
Viv sat back, sitting in meditation. Her work for now was done. Now she needed to wait. She would be here to help, as she’d told Tasha, but Tasha would decide the time. Viv took a slow deep breath, rolling her eyes up in her head as far as she could. She exhaled, letting go, dropping into trance, floating and rocking. It was a wonderful place.
Tasha awoke, coming up from a soft, comfortable place. She was surprised to find herself on her back, and it took a moment to remember where she was. As she stretched, she heard someone taking a deep breath. She tilted her head up and saw Viv sitting at her head, smiling and stretching as well.
“How are you?” Viv asked.
Tasha sat up, a bit puzzled. “Fine.” She stretched her arms, and almost reflexively did something with her hands as she took a breath. She felt the tingling coolness spread through her. She looked at Viv and laughed. “You did that to me.”
Viv shook her head, smiling, “No, you did it on your own. I’ve helped awaken it. It’s part of the family, even though your father would deny it.” Viv took a deep breath of her own, straightening. “But now, my young woman, we need to get changed into our somber attire once more, and gather our contribution for tonight’s ordeal.”
Tasha nodded. When they stood, Tasha hugged her aunt. “Thank you so much for the books. They’ve helped keep me sane.”
Viv hugged her niece. She was surprised at the energy flowing in Tasha, and how easily Tasha accepted it.
They changed and finished preparing their contribution to the buffet supper for the evening. Being a relatively small town, the dinner was a fairly big deal. Tasha worked eagerly next to her aunt, talking about family. She laughed at Viv’s predictions of multiple mystery Jell-O salads and questionable casserole dishes.
When they arrived at the church social hall, Tasha saw her aunt’s predictions were all too correct. They added their contributions to the groaning tables.
Tasha ate more or less by herself. She had little in common with the other young teens, and less in common with the older ones. Her parents were talking with other adults. About the only entertainment she had the whole evening was when Viv wondered out loud about the picture of the Pastor being higher than the painting of the founder of the organization. She looked to where Viv was standing, and sure enough, there was a very large portrait of the Pastor, above a smaller painting of Jesus. Some of the adults chuckled, some moved away from Viv. After that Tasha went over and sat with her parents.
“Daddy, are you all right?” she asked.
Her father gave her a puzzled look.
“You seem upset,” Tasha said.
Her father smiled, “It’s okay, baby, just family politics.”
Her parents went back to ignoring her shortly thereafter. She thought she saw Viv walking nearby, but didn’t want to stare at her; for some reason she knew she needed to keep her distance. She thought she felt something brush the back of her neck as Viv walked past.
And soon Tasha felt so tired, she almost collapsed in the chair, leaning against her father.
“William! That poor girl is worn out!” Viv said loudly, stepping over to Tasha. Viv was glad she’d given Tasha that cue; it would get them both out of their predicament in a socially acceptable way.
Tasha’s mother helped straighten her daughter up. Viv said, “Doris, I’ll take the poor dear home and get her to bed. You two stay here and chat -- it’s not often you get to visit.”
Tasha vaguely felt herself being helped to her feet, being helped with her coat, and walking out the door.
She felt the cool night air. She was so tired, holding on to Viv.
Then Viv said softly, “Alert and awake again.”
Tasha couldn’t believe it. She was wide awake and alert. Viv grabbed her arm and laughed softly as they walked to the car.
“What was that? How did you do that?” Tasha asked.
“I’ll explain later dear. We needed to get out of there before one of us caused a scene.”
“What could I do?” Tasha objected.
“Oh, I saw the way you looked at your cousin, and I’m pleased you kept your mouth shut.”
Bile formed in Tasha’s throat. “Just because those fools paid more attention to a seventeen year girl old with a child than to one who’s been admitted to four universities with full scholarships?” she spat out.
Viv hugged her niece. “Something like that dear. I’m proud of you.”
Tasha sighed as she sat in the car. “Oh aunt Viv, what am I supposed to do?”
Viv patted her hand. “Learn and grow dear; learn and grow.”
They drove home in silence. When they walked in the door, Viv said, “I want you to shower and get ready for bed, then meet me in my study.”
Tasha complained, “But I showered this morning, and I’m not tired.”
Viv looked down at her niece. “No arguing.” Then she softened her gaze, smiled, and gave the girl a hug. “Trust me dear.”
Tasha gave her aunt a hug, then stepped back smiling herself. “Okay, when you put it that way.”
They both laughed and Tasha scooted up the stairs.
The shower did feel good; she imagined herself washing away narrow-mindedness. She put on her nightshirt and dried her hair, and brushed her teeth.
She rejoined Viv in the study, surprised this time at the lack of incense and candles. This time, Viv was sitting on the floor, and waved Tasha to a cushion near her. Tasha sat down.
“Here, drink this down.” Viv said, handing Tasha a small cup of tea. Tasha tasted it and wrinkled her nose. “Ugh!”
Viv put a hand on her arm. “That’s why I said drink it down. Please.”
Tasha looked at her aunt questioningly, then looked at the cup, and quickly swallowed its contents. She looked at her aunt again, and was handed a glass of water, which she drank appreciatively.
Tasha shuddered a bit at the taste of the tea; the water hadn’t quite gotten rid of the taste. Then Viv handed her what looked like a mouth guard.
“Do you know what this is?” Viv asked.
“It looks like a mouth guard the hockey and football players use,” Tasha told her.
“That’s right. It’s for you.” Viv said with a smile.
Tasha wrinkled her brow, and was about to ask, “Why?” when her aunt took out a second item. Tasha was puzzled at first, then blushed.
Viv laughed softly. “I see you know what this is,” she said, holding the butterfly vibrator, “Have you used one before?”
Tasha shook her head, “No,” she whispered.
Viv sighed. “Would you like me to show you how to put it on?”
Tasha smiled and nodded, her heart stating to beat faster. “Yes, please.”
“Stand up then, dear,” Viv said.
Tasha stood up and her aunt helped her fit the vibrator in place, helping her adjust the straps, having her squat down a little to settle it in place. Tasha tingled from one end to the other, even though her aunt was using the tone of voice you’d expect for trying on new shoes.
“But what’s this for?” Tasha asked when she’d pulled up her panties and dropped her night shirt again, now holding the mouth guard.
Viv stood up. “Put it in your mouth. Now.”
Tasha put it in her mouth, biting on it.
“Can you talk now?” Viv asked.
Tasha tried, but the mouth guard prevented it.
Viv laughed. “It’s to keep you quiet.” She put her hands on Tasha’s shoulders and looked her in the eye. “Here’s what I want you to do. I want you to go to your bedroom and get into bed, on your back. Get comfortable, holding the control in your right hand. Breathe deep and slow through your nose and let that wonderful cool tingling fill you. Move it with your breath, in and out. Do that for as long as you can, then turn this on.”
Tasha understood, but she didn’t. She started to ask a question, but still had the mouth guard in her mouth.
Viv leaned over and kissed her on the forehead. “You’ll understand as it happens. Do it, and I’ll see you in the morning. You can sleep in -- the graveside service isn’t until eleven.”
Tasha sighed and gave her aunt a hug. She left the room, going down the hall to hers.
When she went in the door, the incense hit her. It was strong but delicious. She soon felt as if she was melting. She moved quickly to the bed, getting comfortable on her back.
Through her first deep breath and exhale, she almost ... she didn’t know what she almost did, but her heart beat faster in anticipation. She remembered her aunt’s voice and moved the coolness through her with each breath.
After a short while she knew she was fading fast -- she felt that rocking sensation again, even though part of her knew she was flat on her back in bed. It was hard, but she pushed the knob with her right thumb.
And would have shrieked if it hadn’t been for the mouth guard. The sensations shot through her and the control fell out of her hand as she started arching her back. She’d masturbated before, but it had never been like this. She breathed deep and slow, and now the tingle was like fire, cold fire, as it spread through her, meeting the heat that spread from her loins and her breasts. The feeling built, and built, and built, until she screamed and started falling.
Viv sat outside the door. Even though the door was closed, the whiff she got of the herbs in the incense sent her tingling. She heard the muffled cries from inside and smiled. She started to move her own hand between her legs but stopped; that could wait for later. She looked at her watch. She didn’t expect Tasha’s parents for an hour or more. Then she felt a flash of energy and heard another muffled cry. Viv leaned back against the wall, awash in sensation as she felt -- could she be feeling her? Was it that strong in Tasha, Viv asked herself? She focused on her breath, moving through the energy, letting it flow through her. Viv straightened her legs and collapsed on her back, riding out the wave.
Viv rode out another three waves, or was it five, before going through one that had her moaning in the hallway, clutching a breast with one hand, the other hand between her legs.
Viv moved shakily to her hands and knees. So intense, she thought. She closed her eyes and breathed deep and slow, using the energy she’d been swimming in to extend her awareness. She felt Tasha, and was in awe. So much energy; it was so strong in her.
Viv stood slowly, gathering herself, and went into the room. She flipped down the bedclothes and turned off the vibrator as she checked Tasha’s pulse, strong and slow. Her breathing was regular. Viv coaxed the mouth guard from her mouth and put it on the nightstand. Then she opened the window a bit to air out the room. She started to close the top vent on the incense burner, then smiled. She leaned over and kissed Tasha on the head, then picked up the incense burner by its handle. “Sleep well, my dear. Welcome to a new world,” she said. She left the room, closing the door behind her. No use wasting the rest of the incense, she thought.
A few minutes later, her cries filled the house.
Tasha woke to cool air on her face. She opened her eyes and looked at the clock -- a little after eight. She rolled to her back. And as the plastic thing between her legs made its presence known once again, images flooded into her. The images and sensations of falling between the worlds filled her again. She remembered.
Then she smiled and started that slow, deep breath. She let it fill her once again. If she held the back of her throat, making a soft “haaa” sound as she exhaled, it moved better. Wasn’t that in one of the Tibetan books? After a while she followed the wire coming out of her panties until she found the control. Did it turn off automatically? She hit the switch.
The sensations were intense. After her first loud moan, she realized how useful the mouth guard had been. She tried to flip over to her stomach, but couldn’t move from the waist down. Her arms were hard to move. She had to do something soon, or she’d wake the house for sure. She was able to grab the pillow next to her and stuff it into her face before she came.
Viv was downstairs in the kitchen with Bill and Doris, getting breakfast started. They’d thanked her for letting them stay at the hall; they’d enjoyed talking to people. As they were chatting, Viv felt an intense and dizzying surge of sensation. She grasped the edge of the counter for a moment, and when it passed, turned to the others. Her brother was reading the paper and his wife was looking at a fingernail. They hadn’t felt a thing. She sighed to herself -- was that good news, or bad?
“I’ll be right back. I’m going to check on sleepyhead,” she said, and left the room.
She got up the stairs and inside Tasha’s room before the next one hit. When it did, Viv was so close that she collapsed on to the bed, and reached out a hand to touch Tasha’s arm; her arms were holding a pillow to her face.
Viv touched Tasha and thought she’d grabbed a live wire. She was carried away by a tidal wave of sensation and energy burning through her. She rode it as best she could, not fighting it, but directing it through her.
Finally it faded, only to start building again. Viv struggled back to the world and found the control in the bedclothes. She turned the vibrator off.
Viv sat up on the bed, shaking and shaken. She looked at her fingernails; they seemed to be glowing. She moved Tasha’s limp arms and moved the pillow from her niece’s face. Tasha was breathing fast and deep, her pulse beating strong and fast in her neck.
Tasha thought she’d felt something else during the second one. Then things stopped. She floated for a while. She felt someone moving her arms and pulling the pillow away. Without opening her eyes, she knew it was aunt Viv.
Tasha felt Viv’s presence. She took one more deep breath, smoothing out the energy roiling around them, then opened her eyes.
Viv looked in wonder as she watched Tasha smile, then take a deep breath. She felt herself calming, settling. Tasha opened her eyes.
“Good morning dear,” Viv said with a wry smile.
Tasha smiled, then blushed. “Did I wake the dead?”
Viv laughed. “No, you didn’t. Why don’t you go shower, then get dressed.” She leaned over and kissed her niece on the forehead. “Breakfast won’t be for half an hour or so.”
Tasha sat up slowly as Viv left the room. She stretched her arms, looking in awe at her hands. As she got out of bed she noticed her nightshirt, panties, and parts of the bed were soaked. She remembered the conversations of her classmates at gym, talking over loudly about smelling like sex, trying to embarrass her. She figured that’s what she probably smelled like right now. She smiled. She didn’t care what she smelled like, she felt great! She took off her new-found friend and placed it carefully in the nightstand drawer, then headed for the bathroom.
Viv headed downstairs, composing herself in the dining room prior to stepping into the kitchen. When she walked into the kitchen, she stopped, stunned.
They looked different, her brother and his wife. They looked thin or transparent somehow. She shivered; she’d experienced this only once before, many years ago when....
“How’s our little girl doing?” Bill asked.
Viv sighed and moved to the sink, looking out the window. “She’s up and showering, she was exhausted last night, poor dear. I think she’s holding up very well.”
Bill and Doris both agreed. Doris mentioned that the time away from school would do her good; it was good for her to spend time away from her books.
Viv had the inkling of a plan. It might work.
Tasha was surprised; even though she’d showered the night before, her scalp was soaked with sweat. She laughed; she’d had a wild ride. She paused for a moment, feeling the coolness in her palms and soles, and the energy extending down through her legs. It was amazing how invigorating that was. She had a lot of serious questions for her aunt.
She dressed casually, expecting to change before heading off to the cemetery. She went down the stairs, through the dining room, into the kitchen....
She saw Viv first, standing at the sink. Then she looked at her parents, gasped, and fell.
Viv turned just in time to see Tasha go pale, gasp, and fall to the floor. She rushed over, along with Bill and Doris.
Tasha was shocked. Viv looked normal, but her parents.... They looked transparent, washed out, so strange. The whole room shimmered, with aunt Viv being the only solid thing in it. They helped her to a kitchen chair. Her hands were shaking as her mother held her, trying to comfort her. She looked at her mother, almost through her, then at aunt Viv.
She closed her eyes and took that slow breath, calming herself. When she opened her eyes things were the same -- her parents looked thin still.
She forced a smile. “I’m all right. I came down the stairs too fast I guess.”
Viv looked at Tasha; they exchanged smiles. Viv was struck by how solid and full Tasha looked in comparison to her parents. Had Tasha seen that as well? Was that it? Viv turned back to the sink, letting Doris tend to her daughter.
From the glances they exchanged during the morning, both Tasha and Viv knew they needed to talk, privately. They both also knew it would be a while before they could.
Tasha managed to eat. Actually, once she started, she realized she was starving. The difference in how people looked started to fade, but was still very troubling. Her mother hovered and fussed over her, not realizing this only made things worse. Why was aunt Viv staying so distant? She finally escaped her mother’s attention by going to the bathroom. At last, sitting in privacy, she had a chance to compose herself. Viv did this to me, she thought with a momentary flash of anger. Then she sighed and closed her eyes. No, it’s as much of a surprise to Viv as it is to her; she could feel that. Viv meant her well. She’d just have to deal with it as best she could until they had a chance to talk.
Tasha thought she’d get a chance to talk to Viv when they went upstairs to change, but her mother insisted on helping. The only thing she could do was exchange glances with Viv.
The four of them stood in somber dress in the front parlor. Viv suggested, “Why don’t Tasha and I drive over together.”
Bill looked at his sister and said flatly, “No. I’m driving and you’re riding with us.”
Viv sighed and acquiesced. Actually, it worked out well, allowing her to sit next to Tasha in the back of the car. She held Tasha’s hand, closed her eyes, and started calming herself.
Tasha’s heart leaped in excitement when Viv suggested they drive over together, and was soon dashed by her father’s response. But then in the back seat of the car, feeling Viv’s hand, feeling the calming influence, she smiled and closed her eyes, going with the calming feeling, soon leaning against Viv, feeling a comforting arm wrap around her.
By the time they got to the cemetery Tasha was feeling pretty much in control again.
That semblance of control was shattered as they walked to the gravesite. It was the people again, and the way they looked. Some of them looked so thin, so almost transparent and ethereal. She looked around at the gathered crowd, ignoring the preacher’s words. She tried her slow breathing, moving the energy around, but that only seemed to make things worse.
Then as she looked around, she saw a pattern emerge. The younger the person, the more solid they seemed. The older, the more ephemeral looking. She saw one old man using a walker and being supported by a younger man; the old man was almost transparent. The conclusion struck her and she closed her eyes, sobbing. Was she seeing the amount of life they had left? Had she seen that in her parents? What about that cousin, off to the side, he seemed to flicker -- one moment as solid as the rest, the next moment almost gone.... She burst into tears.
She felt strong arms hold her on both sides: her parents. But they were dying, she thought. Then with another sob she realized: we’re all dying, from the day we’re born. In an instant, the realization of the First Noble Truth hit her: the world is full of suffering.
She felt another pair of hands on her; strong hands, cool hands, aunt Viv’s hands. She felt herself being led away as she sobbed.
Eyes still closed, sobbing, she was helped back into the car. She felt Viv’s presence sitting next to her, her arms around her.
“What have you done to me? What have you done?” Tasha cried in anger and fear.
Viv held the girl and tried her best to comfort her. “Tasha, I’m sorry you’re going through this. I’m sorry it’s so hard. Hold me and breathe through it; you can do it.”
Tasha started to pull away; that had been the start of her troubles. “No, I won’t.”
Viv sensed the rebellion growing in the youngster. She sighed; she remembered the terror she’d experienced going through this on her own. How much worse it must be for Tasha. Still, she was glad she’d prepared her for it. She brought a hand up and caressed the back of Tasha’s neck as she said softly, “Relax Tasha, relax for me.”
Tasha felt herself melting under her aunt’s touch and her words. Soon she was in that floating, rocking place, safe again. She realized she could only be hurt by the feelings if she held on to them; she needed to let them flow through her, flow around her, like raindrops striking a leaf and running off. Arising and falling -- arising and falling -- they were impermanent.
Viv saw the service breaking up and people returning to the cars. That would have to for now. She continued her gentle stroking of Tasha’s arm and said, “Tasha, awake and alert again, remaining calm and centered.”
Tasha took a deep breath and opened her eyes, sitting up in the seat and wiping the tears from her eyes. She looked at her aunt, so solid and vivid beside her. She squeezed her hands and said softly, “Thank you.”
Her parents got back into the car. Tasha looked at them and started crying softly.
Doris turned to her daughter. “Are you better now?”
“Yes mother,” Tasha said softly, feeling the lump in her throat. When would she be at a place like this, burying them? “It’s hard, that’s all.”
Her father started the car, saying gruffly, “At least there’s someone who’s concerned about more than what Wes had to leave them.”
They drove back to Viv’s house in silence. As they went in the door, Viv said, “I’ll help her upstairs to lie down; she needs to rest. Then we can have tea in the parlor.”
Bill nodded as he started removing his tie.
Viv helped Tasha up the stairs, out of her clothes, and into bed. She leaned over her, sitting on the bed. “You should relax and practice your breathing for a while. Nap if you can. We’ll talk as soon as we have the chance. I promise. Okay?”
Tasha trembled a little; she was frightened. “Aunt Viv, can you help me?” she asked.
Viv smiled and reached out, placing her hands at the girl’s temples. She started stroking them softly, and said, “Relax Tasha, relax for me.” Tasha sighed and her eyes drifted closed. Viv spoke for another couple of minutes, then leaned over and kissed her on the forehead.
She went to her study. She needed something special for the tea. She wasn’t sure she liked the pace things were taking, but at least they were going in the proper direction!
Tasha floated in her soft rocking space, rocking gently, feeling the coolness flow through her. She noticed some spots where the flow wasn’t as smooth, and worked them gently to even them out. One spot along her right side opened up with a brief hot searing pain, followed by a rush of coolness, almost as if something blocking a stream had broken or been burned out and finally fallen away.
She drifted up from her safe place, finally opening her eyes. She sat up feeling calm and refreshed. She got dressed and went downstairs.
She almost laughed as she stepped into the parlor. More questions for Viv -- she saw the very relaxed glow in her parents as they sat holding hands.
Doris smiled as she saw her daughter descend the stairs. She looked much better now.
“Come sit with me dear. You look much better,” she said.
Tasha sat next to her mother, giving Viv an accusatory glance at the teapot as she did so.
Viv gave Tasha a smile.
Doris held her daughter’s hand and smiled. “You look so much better! You had us worried this morning.”
Tasha smiled.
“We were talking, dear,” Doris continued, “Your father and I have to head home tomorrow, but you could stay on with Aunt Viv for a few days if you’d like.”
Tasha closed her eyes and focused on calm. After a breath, she opened her eyes and said, “That would be nice. For how long?”
Viv moved a little forward in her chair. “Oh, I could take you back any time during the week, but next weekend would probably make the most sense, if you wouldn’t mind staying until then. I’d like your company.”
Doris patted her daughter on the leg. “I think you could use a break from all those books. The fresh air and change of scenery will do you good.”
“Yes, mother,” Tasha said with a small smile. She looked at Viv. “Could I have some tea? I’m thirsty.”
Viv pursed her lips; her niece caught on very quickly. “Why don’t you help me in the kitchen, dear. We’ll see what we can rummage up for a late lunch.”
Tasha stood up after Viv did, and followed her through the dining room and into the kitchen. In the kitchen Tasha threw her arms around Viv and hugged her tight. “Oh thank you! How did you manage that?” she asked quietly.
Viv laughed softly and hugged her niece. “I simply suggested that having you stay here for a few days would give them some time alone together.”
Tasha gave a low laugh. “Yeah, that and the contents of the teapot.”
Viv stepped back and held her niece at arm’s length, eyeing her. “Why, what on Earth are you accusing me of?” she said with a smile.
Tasha smiled. “I don’t know, but I’m very glad you did it.” She sighed and looked serious. “I have a lot of questions. Some times I think I can deal with it, other times it scares the hell out of me.”
Viv hugged her close again. “I know dear; I know. And you’re handling it so well, far better than I did.”
Tasha raised an eyebrow.
“Yes, I went through this,” Viv said matter of factly, “as did Wes, and without anyone to guide or help us, except each other. But now, let’s make some sandwiches before they start getting suspicious.”
After one more hug, Tasha helped Viv put together some lunch. After setting things on the kitchen table, Tasha said, “I’ll go get mom and dad.”
Viv grabbed her by the arm as she was walking out of the kitchen. “No, I think I should do that.” Viv and Tasha exchanged glances, and chuckled together.
“Just what was in that teapot?” Tasha asked.
“You’ll learn, I promise.” Viv said as she stepped out of the room.
She returned a bit later, smiling. She leaned over to Tasha and whispered conspiratorially “You won’t notice a thing. Act as if nothing is going on.”
Still, Tasha almost fell out of her chair when her parents came in the room. She couldn’t believe it! The way they looked, her parents must have been making out like crazy! After her parents sat down at the table, she stood up and walked into the parlor. She quickly picked up the teapot, swirling it. Lifting the lid, she saw it had about half a cup left. Looking over her shoulder, she downed the contents quickly, then set the empty pot on the tray, gathered the cups and saucers, and took them into the kitchen, placing them by the sink.
“Why thank you!” said Viv in an overly enthusiastic voice, giving Tasha a look that told her she knew perfectly well what she’d done.
“Glad to help,” Tasha said with a grin as she sat down.
About halfway through lunch Tasha felt a warm glow spreading through her. How she’d like to go upstairs, collapse back on the bed, and ... She gave Viv a hot glare.
Viv smirked and suppressed a laugh. Serves her right, she thought. Well, let’s unfold things a little more. “Tasha,” Viv said, “would you like to go to Springfield with me? I promised a friend I’d drop some things by earlier in the week. I really should do it today.”
Tasha smiled, not looking at her parents. Springfield was a forty minute drive, at least. That meant at least an hour and a half away from the house. She thought for a moment. She could play this either way.
She tilted her head a little to the side. “Oh, I was feeling tired and looking forward to a nap...” she said, watching the surprise on Viv’s face, “But I think the fresh air would do me good. When would you like to leave?”
Both Viv and Tasha almost broke into laughter as Bill moved his chair on the floor noisily.
“Oh, we should leave soon to miss the traffic. As it is, we’ll be gone at least two hours.”
Tasha kept her eyes on Viv. She thought she heard her mother sigh. Tasha dug her fingers into the inside of her thigh to keep from laughing. “I’ll go upstairs and go to the bathroom and get my coat,” she said, standing up and leaving the room quickly. She raced up the stairs, and started laughing out loud as she reached the top. She went into her room and closed the door. She took a sharp breath. She wanted that thing between her legs! God, what must her parents be feeling! She grabbed her coat with a shaking hand, then quickly went to the bathroom.
Viv was standing at the bottom of the stairs, ready to go, when Tasha came down. Viv took her arm and whisked her out the door.
“Don’t I get to say goodbye?” Tasha protested.
“Naughty child!” Viv scolded, pulling Tasha along. They both laughed. They got in Viv’s car and headed off. Tasha asked, “Go back for my sunglasses?”
They both burst out laughing. Tasha let her head go back against the headrest and put both hands between her legs. “What was in that tea! I can’t believe it! I’m so hot! How can you stand it!”
Viv chuckled and said “It serves you right. Would you like me to help you relax?”
Tasha moaned. Viv said, “Not that way, dear.”
Tasha laughed a little and sat up. She looked around. “I thought you said we were going to Springfield. Isn’t it that way?” She pointed to the left.
Viv nodded. “Very observant. We’re not going to Springfield. We’re going to Wes’s place where we can talk for a while. How’s that?”
Tasha sobered suddenly. “Yes. Please.”
Viv laughed. “Relax dear. The hard part is over. You’re doing fine, and we’re going to have a wonderful time together.”
Tasha sighed. “What’s happening to me, aunt Viv? You and Wes went through this? Why not Dad too?”
Viv sighed as well. “Your father doesn’t have it. I don’t know why. Wes and I were the only ones who did. Our parents didn’t have it, but I think my mom’s mother did. And to answer your next question, I don’t know what ëit’ is, other than a gift.”
Tasha muttered, “Some gift.”
Viv reached over and squeezed a hand. “And Tasha, I’d be less than honest if I didn’t tell you that you seem to have it much, much stronger than Wes or I ever did.”
Tasha said, “Great.”
“It is a gift, and it will open many doors for you, if you learn to use it correctly. I hope you’ll forgive me, but when I was sure you had it, I had to awaken it in you. I didn’t want to risk you going through that on your own. With everything that’s happened, I’m very glad I did.”
Tasha squeezed her Aunt’s hand. “I think I am too. What happens to those who go through it on their own? How many of us are there?”
Viv nodded; she’d said “us.” “Yes, dear, we are different. There aren’t very many of us. In times past, we were often revered as healers, or mystics -- or burned as witches.”
Viv pulled into the gravel drive to her brother’s place, then took a left turn onto another gravel road.
“We’re not going to the house?” Tasha asked.
Viv shook her head. “No, we’re going to his library. Wes left it to me. There are some things I want to get, and it will be a good place to talk. And, you can help yourself to any of the books.”
Viv parked next to a plain looking outbuilding with well weathered metal siding and roof. Tasha gasped in astonishment when they went in. Inside, with the light turned on, the space was practically filled with books! She walked slowly, turning around, touching books reverently.
Viv smiled. “And some members of the family would just as soon see it burned to the ground. They’re afraid of what’s in here.”
Tasha shook her head. She understood, but didn’t understand.
There were chairs and cushions in one corner. They sat and talked. They went through the spectrum of emotions -- laughter, tears, joy, sorrow, and more.
Viv looked at her watch. “Well, it’s been two hours. They should have it worked out of their systems by now.” She gave Tasha a smirk.
Tasha sighed. “I love them. I wish them well. I don’t want to hurt them, but all this...”
Viv nodded as she stood. “You’re right -- they wouldn’t understand, at least not now. Very few would, or will. Being very careful is part of the price we learn to pay for our gift.”
They hugged again, and left the library, locking it up. Tasha had a pile of books.
On the way back, Tasha asked, “So what’s our cover story?”
Viv laughed. “You catch on quick.” They discussed their story, stopping to pick up groceries.
As they were getting out of the car back at the house, Viv said, “Let me go in first. Oh, by the way, if they’re okay, I’m going to make a special pudding for desert. You’ll want to wear your mouth guard to bed, along with something else....”
Tasha shared Viv’s low laugh. Then she wrinkled her brow and asked, “If they’re okay? I don’t understand.”
Viv sighed. “They might feel bad about what they did, guilty. Some people are pretty hung up.”
Tasha sighed. She really wished her parents well. Still, the thought of them making passionate love.... She sighed again -- they must. Well, she hoped they did.
Viv waved her in to the house moments later. Her mom was busy in the kitchen cleaning potatoes at the sink.
“Hi mom,” Tasha said, giving her a squeeze and a kiss. Her mom was smiling and looking quite pink. “Where’s dad?”
Her mother smiled as she scrubbed a spud with vigor. “Your father has had a rough few days. He’s taking a nap. We’ll wake him later.”
Her dad got up about an hour later, coming in to the kitchen, smiling and stretching, then pulling his wife out of her chair and giving her a warm hug and kiss.
“William! What are you doing in front of our daughter!” Doris complained.
Bill gave his wife another squeeze and said, “Showing her that we love each other very much.”
Doris laughed and snuggled closer.
Viv said, “Tasha, want to help me make some pudding for desert?”
Dinner was good solid Midwestern faire. As Tasha and Viv started in on the dishes, Bill announced he and Doris were going for a walk.
After they’d gone, Tasha looked at Viv and asked, “Where are they going?” The nearest neighbor was around three miles away.
In reply, Viv rolled her eyes and shook her head. Tasha blushed a bit and sighed.
Her parents returned arm in arm and smiling. Viv and Tasha served the pudding, and everyone soon retired to their respective bedrooms.
Tasha left the bathroom and returned to her bedroom, to meet Viv there, setting up the little incense burner. Tasha looked at it and sighed.
Viv chuckled. “Don’t worry. It’s not as strong as last night.”
Tasha smiled and reached for her new friend in the nightstand drawer. She looked at Viv and asked, “Does this thing turn off automatically after a while?”
Viv smiled. “No dear, it doesn’t. Last night I turned it off, and I’ll undoubtedly do the same tonight. Would you like some help putting it on?”
Tasha nodded and hugged her aunt.
A few minutes later, relaxing in bed, she started her deep breathing again, mouth guard in place and the control in her right hand. After a while she felt that hot glow start to return, joining the rocking feeling. Did she hear a cry from someplace in the house? She held out as long as she could, took a deep slow breath, and as she exhaled she turned the switch.
In her own room, Viv got ready, preparing her own vibrating friend. It had been so long, she thought. Now that Wes was gone, she could clean things up around here and move to where she’d have a chance at finding someone. She sighed and calmed her mind, opening her awareness and focusing on her niece. She felt the glow from the pudding, but waited, focusing on Tasha, waiting, waiting.... At last she felt the shock and thrill run through her signaling Tasha’s start. Viv slid her friend home and turned it on.
She dragged herself from bed later, her friend having slipped out, buzzing merrily against the inside of one leg. She turned it off and put it back in the nightstand drawer, then went down the hall to check on Tasha. Tasha was on her side, sleeping. The vibrator was turned off and the mouth guard on the side table. Viv kissed her good night and went back to bed.
Tasha woke up to sunshine and stretched. It was nice to sleep in a larger bed; she had a twin bed at home, and this was a Queen. She looked over at the mouth guard on the dresser and contemplated for a moment. She could slip it in and.... She sat up with a laugh. There would be plenty of time for that. She rolled her head and shoulders as she thought about last night’s wild ride. It had been more, how would you put it, visceral than the night before, which had been more mystic. She laughed again. Somehow she didn’t think Miss Jenny McCarthy, who’d bedded most members of both the school football and hockey teams, would be able to discern or discuss the difference.
She got up and went to shower. Once again, her hair was wet.
When she came down, she looked around. Viv was in the kitchen, reading the paper.
“Where are mom and dad?” she asked.
Viv smiled. “They left before you woke up.”
Tasha sighed. She’d wanted to say goodbye. Then she chuckled. “How did they look?”
Viv gave a low laugh. “Quite rosy. Your father mentioned not going back to work this week -- I think they’re making a long weekend of it.”
Tasha sat down and with a determined smile on her face said, “Good for them!”
When they finished laughing, Tasha asked, “And what are we going to do?”
Viv said, “We have quite a bit to do before Wednesday night.”
Tasha furled her brow. “What’s Wednesday night?”
Viv smiled and said softly, “The full moon dear, the full moon.”
The following Saturday afternoon as they drove back to her home, Tasha said, “Please stop the car,” just as they approached the outskirts of town.
Viv nodded and pulled over at a wide spot. It was actually a good place to stop, along the side of a hill and offering a good view of the town and the river below.
Tasha got out of the car and walked to the edge, looking out. Viv walked to her side, putting an arm around her.
“I don’t know how I’m going to do it,” Tasha sighed.
“What?” Viv responded.
“Live in this world for another year and a half, until I go off to college.”
One of the things they’d discussed was whether Tasha should finish her senior year of High School, or go to college at the end of her junior year. They’d also talked about schools. They’d agreed she should go through her senior year, but hadn’t agreed on which college to attend after that.
Tasha hugged her. “You’ll live it as we all do, moment by moment. But unlike many, you’ll be present in those moments, and will make the most of them.”
Tasha turned to Viv and looked her in the eye. “I am so different now. You’ve opened new worlds to me.” She smiled proudly. “And one of the things I feel the best about, the most certain about, I can’t tell people. I can’t tell people those four words I screamed out Wednesday night; words I screamed out with certainty and with pride, words I know separate us from all of them.” She continued softly, “But make us closer.”
Viv felt her tears forming. “I know. Say them, softly, with me.”
Tasha turned facing the town, holding one of Viv’s hands. She closed her eyes, opened her palms, and took a deep slow breath. She remembered Wednesday night; she’d always remember Wednesday night, skyclad under the stars and the full moon. She felt the energy roil through her again, and felt the connection with Viv, a connection she knew she would keep for as long as they lived. She felt the connection, and with pride, gratitude, and more than a little emotion she said, not so softly, “I am a witch!”
Tasha turned to face Viv; they held hands. Viv smiled and spoke softly, but clearly:
We are the Power in Everyone
We are the Dance of the Moon and the Sun
We are the Hope that will never hide
We are the Turning of the Tide.
Viv felt Tasha’s pride, and her power. She’d spoken on the phone to others on the West Coast; they both had. She knew Tasha would grow, and would grow strong over the next year and a half.
They hugged and got back in the car.
Tasha was happy to get back to her house. Her dad was working in the yard out front. Tasha ran from the car and gave him a hug. “Oh daddy, I missed you!”
Bill hugged his daughter. “We missed you too. We’re glad you’re home.”
Tasha had a tearful reunion with her mother. Viv helped her take things back to her small room. She had her clothes, and a small box of books, including one hollowed-out volume containing her battery operated friend. She and Viv had debated long and hard on that one.
Viv was invited to stay for dinner, and accepted.
Sitting around the dinner table, Tasha couldn’t help but notice how happy her parents seemed. They hadn’t had time alone for quite a while. With Viv’s help, that would change.
As Bill sat at the table, he couldn’t help but notice his daughter had changed. She was even more adult now, more mature. She reminded him so much of ... Viv. The thought troubled him -- he had his suspicions about Viv, and his brother Wes. But he loved his daughter. He knew she was special. He had vowed to support her any way he could, even if he didn’t understand her.
He looked at his sister, concerned at first, then he smiled. Wes had been a good man. You could point to a lot of people he’d helped, and not one he’d hurt. The same went for Viv. Could he say the same about himself?
Viv saw the feelings projected on her brother’s face, and watched them resolve into a smile. She felt good. He’d made his mind up, and she knew things would work out. Not without hitches, but they’d work out.
Tasha couldn’t take the silence. She said, “Mom, dad? I’ve decided. I want to do my senior year in High School. And, I want to take piano lessons again, and maybe something else, like flute.”
Bill nodded to his sister. He knew those decisions had to have come through her help. He turned to his daughter. “I’m glad you’ve decided. I’ll help you however I can.”
Tasha was surprised at the emotion in her father’s voice, and the love she felt. She didn’t know how she was going to do it, but she would, one moment at a time.
Later that night, Bill walked Viv out to her car. How had he grown so distant from her? How could he make it up to her, and to Wes?
“Sis,” he said hesitantly.
Tasha stopped and turned to her brother.
“Bill?”
He sighed and held out a hand; she took it. He remembered running down the street, skipping with her, holding hands, laughing as kids do, kicking piles of leaves.
“Thank you for all your help. I have the feeling we’re going to be seeing a lot more of you. I’d like to see you more often. I’m sorry that...”
Viv hugged her brother. “Oh Bill, it’s okay; I understand. And I’m here to help.”
They stepped apart a bit, still holding hands. “Bill, Tasha is a very special and gifted child. You know that. I’ll help however I can.”
Bill fought back tears. “What’s happening to my baby girl?” he whispered.
Viv hugged him again. “She’s growing up. And she loves you both so much. Not only is she smart, but she’s kind and considerate. You should be proud of her, and you’ll be more proud of her in years to come.”
Bill held his sister. “But she’ll always be my baby girl.”
With one more hug, Viv got in her car and drove off. As she wiped the tears from her eyes she smiled; her baby brother was growing up, too.
FIN
Rev 4/20/2004
The Veil - Awakening
by silli_artie@hotmail.com
http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Authors/artie/www