This short story is an entry in the 2003 Soc.Sexuality.Spanking Summer Short Story Contest and is copyright by the author and commercial use is prohibited without permission. Personal/private copies are permitted only if complete including the copyright notice. The author would appreciate your comments
Category: Mini-saga
One Kinky Day
By
Pam <pamimac@aol.companties>
Remove my panties before responding
I'm there. Nervous. Excited. Showing pictures of the family. Chitchat. It's time he says. Bending over. Clothes on. Leather paddle. Squeals. Clothes off. Flogger. Moans. Spankings on my bottom. Spankings on my breasts. He circles around me striking as he likes. Oh lord but this is heaven. It can't last.
The End
© Copyright Pam, 16 June 2003
Reviews
Ted <quixotoes(at)aol(dot)com>
Clearly and intensely, a succinct titillating encounter, but I found no poetry to it.
Rosa
Nice piece of writing! To me, this mini-saga expresses a belief that alienation is inevitable. The protagonist wants to believe in, but essentially has become hopeless that permanence is possible. Sad and well done!
Jessie
There are some nice touches here, like «Showing pictures of the family.», which create a picture and a mood. I would have liked to have seen more of that, which express the awkwardness of the situation.
The ambiguity of the last sentence might have worked better if the story had said something more about the relationship. The reader wonders, what can't last? Is it just this one day which is being lamented? There's no sign within the story that this was ever anything but a good day of kink between strangers; therefore, the final lament doesn't have much meaning.