I called dad at
noon to tell him not to pick us up. I explained to him, Mr.
Wiggins would be bringing us over to our place, he would leave his
truck there and all of us would ride with him in the Bronco to the
Dunbar ranch.
“Part of Mr.
Wainright’s conditions for Sidney helping us was Mr. Wiggins has to be
a part of our commando team, Dad.” I told him.
“Humm, I’m bet’n
there weren’t a lot of arguments from you and yore’ brother ‘bout
that.” My old man chuckled.
“When you’re
right, you’re right, Dad.” I laughed. “Sidney thinks we can
use the chores as a cover, so the Colonel won’t get suspicious, and if
by some chance, he should come home early, we’ll just be pleasant and
say we felt bad about him having to do the chores so we came by to give
him a hand.”
“Good
idea. We already talked about dropping by over there to do the
chores before he got home. Frank can tell him we just dropped by
to do them as a neighborly gesture. Maybe he’ll think I’m afraid
of him and try’n to suck up to him. Fine with me, whatever floats
his boat.”
I laughed at my
dad.
“Have I told ju’
lately, I love you, old man?”
“Yeah, but I
don’t never git tired of hear’n it from my boy.”
“Well,— I guess
I don’t tell you nearly enough,— but I do. I’m proud you’re my
old man, Dad.”
There was a
pregnant silence on the other end of the phone.
“Love you, too,
Son. See ya’ll this afternoon.”
“‘Bye, Dad.”
I clicked off my
cell phone with a lump in my throat. I walked to my locker to get
my books for my next class. Peacock’s locker was about eight down
from mine. I saw him rummaging through his locker as I worked the
combination on mine. He saw me and stopped to look at me like he
was about to say something, but stopped as my eyes caught his. He
quickly turned his attention back to his locker.
“Hey, Gary,— how
ya’ doing today?” I said trying to sound well met but not overly
friendly.
He looked up at
me stunned, like I caught him completely off guard. I could tell
he thought, because of our exchange last week, I would be angry with
him and wouldn’t bother to give him the time of day. A look of
frustration, but pleasant surprise came across his face.
“Uh,— I’m okay,
Casey. You all right?” He responded.
“I’m fine,
buddy. You have a good afternoon.” I tossed off and turned
to walk away.
“Yeah,— thanks,—
you, too, Casey.” he said, like he couldn’t believe I even spoke
to him.
* * * * * * *
That afternoon
there were more than a few of our fellow students noticed me and Dwayne
climb into Mr. Wiggins huge, black, Hummer, with our little
brother. We started out for our ranch. Dwayne and I
couldn’t get over the interior of Mr. Wiggins’ truck. It was done
in the finest leather and not imitation either. The seats sort of
wrapped themselves around you in a warm plush hug. It smelled
like the inside of a new cowboy boot and immediately made Dwayne and my
dick’s get hard. We looked at Sidney sitting between us and
laughed. He was as hard as we were. Sidney showed us the
backseat DVD screen for watching movies on a long trip. It had a
stereo system that made mine at home pale by comparison. It was
unbelievable, but somehow, it seemed to fit the big cowboy
perfectly. It was as if the truck was made for this cowboy.
It shouted strong, handsome, ruggedly individualistic modern Western
man.
It reminded the
three of us of a funny sequence on the ‘Simpsons’ TV show poking fun at
Hummers and large SUVs in general. Homer bought Marge a new all
terrain vehicle called a ‘Canyonero.’ Dwayne, Sidney and I were
great Simpsons fans and immediately named Mr. Wiggins new truck, the
‘Canyonero.’ The three of us would sing the ‘Canyonero’ song
complete with the, ‘yee-haws,’ the whip cracks, and the
‘duddle-lee-ump-tee-umps.’
(http://www.simpsoncrazy.com/downloads/music/canyonero.mp3)
Mr. Wiggins
never watched television so he didn’t have a clue, but he wondered why
we giggled every time we called it that? We were so bad.
Being teenagers, it was also wickedly funny to us. It was stupid
little things that bonded the three of us together all the
more. While we were growing up and learning to accept
responsibility our wicked sense of humor seemed to be still firmly
rooted in boyhood.
Mr. Wiggins
pulled up to the front of our house and we immediately transferred
Sidney’s bag and box of stuff to the back of dad’s Bronco. Dad
already had my stuff in the back. I was pleasantly surprised to
find dad also loaded our tool box and some other tools he thought might
come in handy. As it turned out, a couple did come in quite
handy. Mr. Wiggins lost no time getting to our place. He
didn’t spare the considerable horses under the hood of the Hummer and
dad didn’t either getting to the Dunbar ranch. Time was at a
premium for us to get everything done.
When we arrived,
Frank and Curley came out to greet us. It was a quick ‘hello’ and
my dad was barking orders like the competent leader he was. He
sent Dwayne to do his chores and Sidney and I to the barn. While
Sidney figured out where he wanted the cameras and was camouflaging
them, I ran the power cords as close to them as I could to reach the
twelve volt DC converters for the cameras. I made sure all the
cords were out of the way, wouldn’t be stepped on or tripped over, and
covered with hay or dirt. I was amazed, I thought for sure it
would take us an hour or more, but working together, Sidney and I were
almost through by the time Dwayne completed his chores. All we
had left to do was test the system. The men stayed talking to
each other standing around dad’s bronco while Dwayne, Sidney and I went
to Frank and Curley’s bunkhouse.
I was impressed
with the bunkhouse. I thought it would be a bit more rugged, but
it was basically a big four bedroom house. It was designed for
four men to live in to work the ranch. It was two stories, and
the bedrooms were all upstairs. There never had been four men
work the ranch since Rance and Sadie owned it. Frank and Curley
each had a bedroom, but that was mainly for show. They slept
together every night in Frank’s bed. There was a huge, full bath
with shower upstairs and a half bath downstairs. The living room
or common room, a kitchen and dinning room were all downstairs.
There was also a screened back porch with a washer and dryer. It
was down right homey.
We sat at their
dinning room table. Sidney turned on his lap top. Within
seconds, Sidney sent a signal to the cameras to turn on, and the
feedback from each came up on his lap top as three separate
images. He tested the zoom in and out function on each and they
worked fine. He sent Dwayne to the barn to stand in the place
Dwayne indicated the Colonel usually tied him up and worked him
over. Sidney told him to talk in a normal tone of voice while he
was there.
Dwayne did as
instructed. I was wowed at how clearly I could hear and see
everything; however, when Sidney zoomed in on Dwayne’s crotch, we could
see he was erect. You could see perfectly the outline and head of
Dwayne’s hard penis. It was too funny for Sidney and me. It
only impressed me more of the capabilities of the system and Sidney’s
genius. Sidney was satisfied and shut everything down. We
didn’t want to waste any more time. We wanted to get out of
there.
“Done?”
asked my dad.
“Yes, Sir, Mr.
Longhorn, mission accomplished, Sir.” Sidney replied.
“Gentlemen,—
let’s get out of here. Frank,— Curley,— appreciate talking with
you, and you know what to tell the Colonel.”
“Count on
us!” Frank spoke in a concerned voice like he wanted to do more
than that, but he knew what the boys were doing would bring Brad Dunbar
to his knees. That thought alone, plus his partner's love and
encouragement, sustained his anger at a controllable level.
We were off down
the drive waving goodbye to Frank and Curley. Dad took the back
way home. It was a little longer, but Mr. Wiggins agreed it would
be a good idea. Mr. Wiggins was up front with my dad and we were
in the back seat. Sidney was sitting between Dwayne and me.
He opened his lap top and flipped a switch. Suddenly, Dwayne
appeared on three separate screens and we could hear him talking
clearly. Dwayne couldn’t believe what he was seeing and how
perfect the picture was.
“Ho-lee
shit!” exclaimed Dwayne. “Little brother, you're a
genius. There’s no doubt in my mind. If we get shots like
that of Colonel Jarhead doing his number on me, his ass is ours!”
Sidney had to
show dad and Mr. Wiggins after we got home. They were as blown
away as Dwayne and I. My dad and Mr. Wiggins couldn’t stop
chuckling to themselves. We were all a bit giddy we’d pulled it
off in a minimal amount of time. Mr. Wiggins looked at Sidney and
opened his arms.
“Com’mer,
Son!” he barked at Sidney. Sidney grinned real big and went
to the big cowboy’s arms. Mr. Wiggins held him and kissed him a
good one right on the mouth. It surprised Dwayne and me.
Naturally, we both pissed in our pants again. This was getting
ridiculous. We had to wash our Wranglers every day. Mr.
Wiggins let him go, and my dad spoke up.
“Com’mer, boy,—
y’ain’t through yet!” he barked equally demandingly to
Sidney. He enfolded Sidney in his arms and planted one on Sidney
that made him go weak in the knees. My dad held him tight and
wouldn’t let him go. Sidney just gave in and enjoyed my old man’s
affection. They broke it off, but dad was still holding him tight.
“Damn, Mr.
Longhorn,— I’m so sorry, Sir.” We heard Sidney apologize to my
dad. “Son,— if yore’
ole dick didn’t get hard then you’d have something to apologize
for.” My old man and Mr. Wiggins roared with laughter.
Sidney was not to be outdone.
“Mr. Longhorn,—
Sir,— ya' gotta’ stop doing that. I’m gonna’ get Casey and Dwayne
to teach me to toss a rope. When you ain’t look’n, I’m a’ gonna’
rope and hog tie your ass and commit crimes against nature on your
person worse than Colonel Jarhead ever thought about doing to
Dwayne.” My dad roared with laugher at Sidney’s unbridled
candor. Sidney was learning to bullshit with the best of
us. He was coming along just fine.
“Son,— it ‘ud be
down right hard to rape a willing victim.” My old man replied in
a senatorial voice. “Howsomever,— ” he continued,
“when you think you’re man enough to take on this old cowboy you don’t
have ta’ go to all that trouble. All ya’ gotta’ do is have your
old man gimme’ a call and tell me it’s okay with him.”
Mr. Wiggins
slapped his leg, stomped his big boot on the floor, and started
laughing uncontrollably.
“Oh, fuck,
Vince!” Mr. Wiggins was laughing so hard he could barely
speak, “You don’t know what the hell you’re say’n, pilgrim!
His daddy already done give him permission last night. You’re in
deep do-do, cowboy!” I don’t think I
ever laughed so hard in my life. My old man had an expression on
his face like he’d been had,— but good. Dad always had some
outrageous come back, but not this time. It was one of the very
few times I ever saw my old man speechless. His mouth dropped
open, but nothing would come out. His ass was nailed to the barn
door. Sidney pointed his finger at him and laughed the
hardest. We all broke up laughing at the two of them. It
was a nervous, relieved laughter that we needed to get over the
adrenalin rush from the launching of what Dwayne, Sidney and I started
wickedly referring to as, ‘Operation Sideshow Bob.’
Dad just shook
his head in acceptance, grabbed Sidney, hugged and kissed him
again. Then I saw his eyes light up and a wicked grin crossed his
face. God help me,— I knew what was coming next.
“On second
thought, boy,— you better start taking them roping lessons from Case
and Dwayne.” Dad could barely get it out from laughing so
much. Sidney roared with laugher. We all laughed, but you
could tell; you could just see the gears spinning in our little bubba’s
head, he knew the door was open, he really loved my dad, and one day,
he would crawl up into Vince Longhorn’s big cowboy arms, with my
blessing, and drink deeply of my old man’s love.
* * * * * * *
We said our
goodbyes to our little brother and Mr. Wiggins. They had to get
home to fix dinner for them and Mr. Wainright. It was their night
to cook. Dwayne and I helped dad get our dinner ready. We cleaned
up the kitchen afterward and got out our books to do our homework
around the kitchen table. The phone rang and dad walked to the hallway
to answer.
“Longhorn
ranch.” Dad answered.
“Mr. Longhorn,
this is Frank Mayhew.”
“Call me Vince,
Frank.”
“Thanks,
Sir. Well, we done told Mr. Dunbar you brought the boys by to do
the chores. He didn’t say nothing. He just sort a’ snorted
like he was surprised. He asked how long you were here, and I
told him the truth. I told him you were here only long enough for
Casey and Dwayne to do the chores and then you left. I told him
we talked with you the whole time. He asked if you were bringing
the boys by tomorrow afternoon, and I told him I thought you were
planning on it. He seemed satisfied with that. He didn’t
ask any more questions.”
“Thanks,
Frank. I hope he thinks I’m trying to make up to him. If he
does, that’s fine. Just so’s we can cover for the boys is all I’m
interested in. I want the boy’s plan to work.”
“So do I,
Vince. Know’n them boys like I do, I have a pretty good feeling
they’s gonna’ pull it off without a hitch. I hope they lock that
son of a bitch up for the rest of his life.”
“Let’s hope so,
Frank. I really appreciate you calling.”
“No problem,
Vince. If you need anything give us a call, ya’ hear?
We’re always here.”
“Thanks, Frank,
I will. Goodnight.”
“Goodnight,
Vince.”
* * * * * * *
The next day was
Tuesday. For some reason it was one of those rare days when
school was almost bearable. The weather took a turn for the
warmer, everyone was outside on breaks and many ate outside at
lunch. From the early morning meeting outside on the steps the
three of us were in high spirits. I guess our mood was catching
as we had three quarters of the student body gathered around us
interested in what we might be up to. Sidney was the center of
attention. They all wanted to know about his trainer’s new truck.
We each took turns extolling its virtues and making everyone laugh at
our comparison to the ‘Canyonero.’ The humor wasn’t lost on our
age group.
Dwayne and
Sidney walked with me to the field house locker room after lunch.
I had to do my daily ritual and shave. They came along to keep me
company. We were alone and could talk openly about what the
possibilities for the weekend were. We were talking in
generalities, so if by chance, we were overheard, no one would know
what we were talking about. Operation Sideshow Bob became, OSB.
I was just about
finished shaving when the door opened and Gary Peacock walked into the
locker room. He never came into the field house. While Gary
was a good sized man, he sort of looked down on sports as something for
chumps. We were all surprised to see him and looked from one to
the other. My brothers were looking at me to take the lead.
They didn’t know how to react. I could tell Dwayne and Sidney
were going to let me handle it. I simply nodded to Peacock.
“Hey, guys—
!” Peacock started, kinda unsure of himself, “thought I’d
find you three here. Saw you walking this way. Look, guys,—
I’m sorry for what I said the other day, and I promise I won’t cause
you any more grief. You were right, Longhorn,— I shouldn’t have
said anything about chore’ dad. It was a cheap shot. I
guess it comes from jealously. Truth is, I’d give anything to
have a relationship with my dad like you have with yours.”
he paused for a second, but I didn’t react. I was waiting to see
if there was more. “Anyway,— that’s all I had to say. I’ll leave
ya’ll be. By the way,— thanks for speaking to me yesterday,
Casey.” He turned and walked out of the field house before I had
a chance to say anything.
Dwayne and
Sidney looked at me. Dwayne put his hand on my back and Sidney on
my arm.
“Our little
brother and I was wrong, Case.” Dwayne said quietly.
“So wrong,
Case. We’re sorry.” Sidney agreed.
“Hey,— what’s to
be sorry about, guys? How the hell was I to know jes’ being
pleasant and saying ‘hello’ to the man would prompt this? I was
jest’ as shocked as you were.”
Later that day
I, at our lockers, I offered my hand to Peacock. We shook
hands and I handed him a note. I didn’t say anything. He
didn’t say anything. We didn’t have to. He knew why I offered my
hand. He just nodded, took my note, stuck it in his pocket and
walked off to study hall. The note read, “Thanks! No hard
feelings either way. My shots about your dad weren’t exactly
kind, brother. Let’s forgive and forget. Life’s too damn
short to carry around heavy burdens of hate. Your brother, Casey.”
Sidney had study
hall the same period as Gary. He told us later he watched him
read my note, lay his head on his desk and started sobbing. Mrs.
Perkins walked back to his desk to ask if he was all right. He
assured her he was fine and pulled himself together. We never had
another problem with Gary Peacock.
* * * * * * * Dad picked the
three of us up after school. Mr. Wainright called dad and said he
gave Sidney permission to go with us. He wanted to check out the
system one more time. Dad asked if Sidney could come back, have
dinner with us, and then, we’d bring him home afterwards.
“That’ll be
fine, Vince. I’m sure he’ll enjoy that. Oh, yes, and by the
way, I liked to have laughed my ass off when Sticker came home the
other night and told me about you putting your boot in your
mouth.” Dad heard Sidney roar with laughter on the other end.
“He got me good,
Sid. Can’t gainsay that.” Dad laughed.
“Sticker was
right. Logan hinted around about his feelings for you Sunday
night, when I went in to tell him he could help his brothers. I
told him he certainly had my permission. I have no problem if you
two choose to share a little love. Told ole Sticker I was much
more worried about our boy raping you.” Sidney laughed so did my
dad.
“I can’t help
but love your kid, Sid; however, physical love with him ain't a big
priority with me right now; later on,— if it should happen, I promise
it will happen in a natural way.”
“I know that,
Vince. Jes’ like you told me you’d trust me with your boy, I
trust you completely with mine.”
Sidney was
thrilled when dad told him he was having dinner with us. We went
out to the Dunbar ranch and were once again met by Frank and
Curley. Sidney went to the bunkhouse and retested the system
while Dwayne and I did the chores. With the two of us doing them,
we got them done quicker, and Sidney was waiting for us with dad and
his uncles when we returned. We said our goodbyes to Frank and
Curley. They told us they understood from the Colonel, Mrs.
Dunbar was coming home the next day. Dad told them to tell Sadie
he’d bring Dwayne home from school tomorrow so she wouldn’t have to
pick him up. I hadn’t been around Frank and Curley much, but I
was really beginning to like them. The were much like my dad, two
simple men of the Earth who knew how to work and how to love.
We drove home
and took the regular route. We didn’t run into the Colonel coming
home. We got to our place and dad left us alone to do our
homework. Sidney gathered around the kitchen table with us to do
his. He was finished way sooner than Dwayne and I, and he helped
explain some things about Algebra to me I had little understanding
about. He could explain it in a way that made sense to me.
I could do the problems by simply following the rules the teacher gave
us, but it was like a puzzle for me to figure out. I was smart
enough to do the problems; however, I had no Earthly idea what it
was all about or what good it was for.
‘X’ and ‘Y’ as
unknown quantities were exactly that to me,— unknown. Even after
I solved a problem using the rules, they were still unknown quantities
to me. Sidney helped me see a larger picture of balance in all
things. One side of an equation had to balance the other.
He showed me a nifty little triangle to help understand the way algebra
worked in Ohm’s law. For the first time, I could see a practical
application of how it might,— just might,— be useful. Sidney made
a metaphor that maybe it was like that with everything in the
universe. There must be a balance in all things. Dwayne and
I were certain, Sidney would one day prove Einstein wrong.
Dad came into
the kitchen just as we were finishing our homework and asked if he
could start dinner. It was my turn to cook, but he said he’d
picked up a new Lasagne hamburger helper he wanted to try. Dwayne
fixed a salad, Sidney and I fixed the vegetables. Dwayne and I
were used to dad’s open, equal opportunity kitchen, but Sidney never
got much chance to get his hands into food preparation at home.
He genuinely enjoyed the comradery of us all working to bring something
together to share. About halfway through dinner Dwayne winked at
me and spoke to our little brother.
“Hey, little
brother! After dinner,— wanna’ go upstairs with your brothers and
play hide the big green snake?” we grinned at Sidney. I
thought my old man was going to fall off his chair laughing.
Sidney blushed and looked to my dad for help.
“Don’t look at
me!” Dad laughed, “You’re big enough to make your own
decisions.” he told Sidney. Sidney grinned but continued to
blush.
“Shore’ would
beat watch’n Simpsons re-runs.” He allowed.
“Good! We
was kinda hope’n you might.” Dwayne told him.
After we got the
kitchen cleaned up, Dwayne and I took him upstairs. We spent a
couple of hours relaxing and enjoying each other. Dwayne and I
both got Sidney off and he got Dwayne off as my brother got me
off. We lay there, our arms around each other with Sidney
in the middle. Somehow, our love making between the three of us
was never forced. It seemed like we just did what was natural for
us. We gave and shared equally. No one was left out or got
more than the other. Sidney lay there for the longest time in our
embrace not wanting to move to break the spell of our bonding.
Dwayne and I had to admit later, it was a powerful moment for us as
well.
“Dwayne?”
Sidney asked innocently. “What’s anal sex like?”
“Yeah, brother,—
I wanna’ know, too. I ain't never asked you because I didn’t know
if you might not wanna’ talk about it.” I added.
“I don’t
mind. I’ve told you and Sidney how addicted I’ve become to the
Colonel’s forcing oral and anal sex on me. I can understand why
both your dads don’t want you doing it until your eighteen. If we
put a stop to the Colonel raping me, I don’t think I’ll do it again
until I’m eighteen. Mostly because you guys won’t be able to, and
I don’t think I really need to. I think it should be something
you do only when you’re old enough to understand it has a more powerful
psychological impact on a person than what we been doing. Now
that don’t mean I don’t think what we do ain’t great. It’s just
different somehow. As to how it feels,— it’s hard to
describe. It hurts at first, but after someone’s loosens you up
and then starts fucking you good, it’s the best damn feeling in the
world. I keep wondering, if’n it feels so good with a man I hate
to be doing it with, what’s it gonna’ feel like with someone I love and
care about. I can only jack-off and dream about having either one
of you up my butt.” Sidney and I giggled and tickled our brother.
“Who’s
gonna’ be your first, Case.” Sidney asked. I grinned real
big at him.
“For a genius,
that weren’t the smartest damn question in the world, little
brother.” Dwayne howled in laugher at Sidney.
“Oh,— ”
blushed Sidney. “It was pretty damn stupid, wud'n it, big
brother? Of course,— how dumb can I be? With a dad like
yours, Case,— I can fully understand. Don’t blame you a
bit.” he laughed with Dwayne.
“Who you want
for your first time, little brother?” I asked Sidney.
“I know who the
hell I’d want if’n I live in the Wainright household.” Dwayne
laughed, and I joined him.
“You know,—
maybe I’m dumber than you guys think. I just never considered it,
especially now that Mr. Wiggins and my dad have bonded. I don’t
know if it would be proper for me to even think about it. I can’t
say I haven’t thought about it in the past, though. I can’t tell
you the number of times I’ve jacked off dreaming about that big cowboy
fuck’n me. I’m sure it would be a fuck to remember the rest of my
life.”
“Amen to that,
little brother.” I laughed and Dwayne agreed.
“Do you think
you guys will get married?” Sidney asked. I knew what he
meant, but I winked at Dwayne.
“I don’t know if
we can. Maybe we could in New Hampshire, but Dwayne ain't even
asked me yet.” I laughed. Sidney poked me in the
stomach. He knew I was joking with him.
“You know what I
mean.” he grinned.
“I ain’t ruling
it out, little brother. Look at chore' dad. He had you and
loved your mother. Now, he’s decided to love a man who has loved
him for years. It only seems right somehow. We all feel
like it’s the right thing for them to do. Look at Dwayne’s
dad. He loved your uncle for years, yet he fell in love with
Dwayne’s mom. He never fully gave up your uncle. Look at my
dad. He and his brother shared love. They shared love with
another big man in their town, named Bubba Swansey. Dad fell in
love with my mom, married her, but never went with another man after
Vietnam until he started sharing some love with me after she
died. Once in a great while, dad and Spencer Winchester share a
bed for an afternoon. Spencer Winchester’s one of the most
happily married men I’ve ever known.”
“I feel like my
brother, here.” picked up Dwayne. “I’ve had sexual
fantasies about both sexes before my step-dad started raping me.
After that, they became pretty much one way on the male side; however,
that may change after Operation Sideshow Bob. I know Casey’s dad
would rather know we three were playing around, experimenting with sex
among ourselves than out getting girls knocked up. Bet
chore’ dad feels the same way, little brother.”
“Yeah, he’s
mentioned as much. I don’t know about myself. I just been
so starved for physical affection from anyone, I haven’t stopped to
even consider the other side of the coin. I ain’t gonna’ say it
couldn’t happen. I don’t know. However, for now, I’m
comfortable being with my brothers.”
Dwayne and I
agreed with him. We got cleaned up, and dad drove us over to the
Wainright mansion to take Sidney home. We said our goodbyes
before we left our place and Sidney just jumped out of the Bronco,
waved and went into his home. On the way back we were
quite. Dwayne and I were coming down to the wire realizing he
would have to go home to his place tomorrow. We were a bit
saddened. Dad knew it and didn’t try to pull us out of it.
He left us alone with our thoughts. We held hands all the way
home.
* * * * * * *
Dad picked us up
at school the next afternoon and we started driving to Dwayne’s place.
“Yore’ momma
called, Son.” he addressed Dwayne. “Said she got home
around noon today. I told her not to worry about picking you up,
I’d take you home. When we git there, you and Casey run do your
chores so’s I can talk with yore’ mom.”
“Yes, Sir, Mr.
Longhorn, and Mr. Longhorn,— ?”
“Yes, Son?”
“Thanks for
everything, Sir. Even with all the shit what went down, I can’t
remember when I had me no better time since my daddy left. I love
you and my brother, Mr. Longhorn, and my little brother, too.”
I could see my
old man was getting choked up. He didn’t answer right away.
“Dwayne,— if’n
the choice was mine, Son, I wouldn’t be taking you back this
afternoon. Don’t chu’ never think for a minute I don’t love you
as much as your two brothers.”
I thought Dwayne
was going to lose it for a minute, but he didn’t. He looked at
me, grabbed my hand and held it all the way to his place. We
pulled up and Sadie Dunbar was there to welcome us. She looked
old and tired; like someone hit her head-on with a diesel truck and
then rolled back over her to make sure they did it right. She
managed a warm smile for us, though. She gave Dwayne and me a big
hug and a kiss. She even had a hug for my dad as she thanked him
for taking care of Dwayne.
“You men run do
Dwayne’s chores.” Dad told us. Dwayne and I turned and left.
“Can’t thank you
enough, Vince. Hated like hell to impose on you like I done.”
“Sadie, you know
better’n ‘nat. Weren’t no imposition. I think of Dwayne as
Casey’s brother. Them boys adopted themselves another little
brother this weekend,— the Wainright boy. He spent a couple of
days with ‘em helping ‘em build their bird pen. That kid is
bright, Sadie. That pen turned out to look like a work of
art.” Dad laughed trying to make things lighter.
“Well, that’s
good,— Dwayne needs friends his own age. I think he’s afraid to
invite any of his friends over here but Casey. Casey’s a good
boy. He just sort of overlooks Brad, but he’s polite to
him. Brad talks to Casey more’n he does Dwayne. I’m gonna’
sit him down tonight and try'n work this out. Then I’ll talk to
Dwayne. I can’t talk to them together, ‘cause all Brad wants to
do is pace back and forth and yell at him. He tries to yell at me
until I just tell him to shut up, I ain’t gonna’ listen to it no more.”
“How’s your
sister, Sadie?”
“Ah,— she’s
still hanging on, Vince. I don’t know how. She’s down to
skin and bones.”
“You gonna’ have
to go back?”
“Yeah, as soon
as I git this worked out between Dwayne and Brad. If I reach an
understanding with Brad, I just may try leaving Dwayne with him this
weekend. While I’m gone, could I count on you bringing Dwayne
home from school. Brad can take him by in the mornings on his way
to the base. Only thing is, Dwayne gets there at six and has to
sit there until classes start.”
“That’s not
necessary. I’ll run by and pick him up. It’s right on the
way, Sadie.”
“I’d shore’
appreciate it, Vince. It ‘ud be a little easier on him.”
“No problem.”
Dwayne and I
walked back to where dad and Mrs. Dunbar were talking.
“All done,
Son?” Dad asked Dwayne.
“Yes, Sir.
We done everything. Double checked it twice.” he replied.
“Good! You
ready to take off, honcho?”
“Yeah, Dad.”
I turned to my
brother, gave him a big hug and a kiss on his cheek.
“Love you,
brother.” I spoke softly.
“Love you, too,
Case.” he replied.
He went to my
dad’s arms, hugged and kissed him goodbye. Dwayne didn’t say
anything. He already told my dad how he felt in the truck.
“Love you,
boy.” Dad told him.
“Love you, too,
Mr. Longhorn.”
We turned, got
into the Bronco and were off down the road. I think dad and I
felt like we left a big piece of our hearts behind. * * * * * * *
Dwayne followed
his mother into the house, and took his small bag of clothes and
personal toiletry items to his room. He quietly closed his door
and took his books out to start his homework. He sat at his desk
and opened his Algebra book to start working on the assignment due
tomorrow. There came a knock on his door.
“Come in.”
he said softly.
His mother came
into the room and sat on his bed.
“Son, I wanna'
talk with you before your step-dad gets home.”
“What about,
Mom?”
“Dwayne, you’ve
been pulling away from me more and more in the last several
months. Well,— for the last six months to be more exact.
You don’t talk to me anymore. You just come in here to your room,
and you’re quiet like you don’t want anyone to know you’re here.
You don’t even come in to watch television with Brad and me
anymore. You haven’t for several months.”
“I have a lot of
homework, Mom. They’ve really been piling it on us,— like
tonight, I have six pages of Algebra problems to do. I’ve got two
chapters of history to read and several other classes I have homework
assignments for.”
“Dwayne, I’m
your mother. I know when something ain’t right with my boy.
You don’t watch television even on weekends when you don’t have
schoolwork. Is Brad really getting to you so bad you don’t wanna’
be around him anymore? I know he can be a pain in the butt
sometimes, but I think he means well by you.”
Dwayne didn’t
say anything. He just sat there staring off into space. He
wouldn’t look at his mother.
“Dwayne?”
“Oh,— I’m sorry,
Mom. I was jes’ thinking about something else. I got a lot
on my mind right now with school and all. No,— the Colonel’s
okay. He just yells a lot. I really don’t do things to piss
him off, Mom,— honest,— at least not consciously. I try to do
everything like he wants. I just think he wants everything done
exactly the way he would do it, and that ain’t possible for me. I
ain’t him, Ma, and I ain’t never gonna’ be him. Truth is, I don’t
wanna’ be like him, Ma; therefore, I ain’t never gonna’ be able to
please him. I’ve just come to accept it; so, I just stay in here
out of your and his way. I only have two more years to go, and
I’ll be out of your and the Colonel’s way for good.”
“Oh, God,
Dwayne! Is that what you think? You’re in my way? You
think you’re in our way?”
“Pretty
much. Look, Mom, I really don’t wanna’ talk about it no
more. Talk to the Colonel when he gets home, and I’ll accept any
punishment he feels I should have. Don’t worry yourself none,
Mom. I’m used to it by now. I appreciate the break I had
over the holidays by staying with Mr. Longhorn and my brother, but I’m
home now. You got too much to worry about taking care of Aunt
Ellen. I don’t want chu’ worrying ‘bout me none.”
“Well, I do
worry about you, Dwayne. What kind of mother would I be if I
didn’t worry about you? You’re not in our way, Son. If
Brad’s got you thinking that way, I’m gonna’ have a serious talk with
him.”
“No, Mom,—
please don’t say nothing, or I won’t tell you anything else. Just let
it be, Mom. I’ll get through it.”
“Get through
what, Dwayne? Talk to me, Dwayne! What are you talking
about?”
“Nothing,
Mom. I just used the wrong word is all. Mom, I really have
to get back to work if I’m gonna’ finish my homework tonight.
Besides, no matter how many times Casey and I double check our work
down to the barn, he’s gonna’ find something wrong with it. I
have to go down there and correct it. Even then, it ain't never
good enough for him. I have to stand there and listen to him for
thirty minutes to an hour tell me what an irresponsible, bad boy I am,
but I’m used to it, Mom. I’m polite to him, I don’t never argue
with him. I just tell him I’ll try to do better next time, and I
do try; cept’n, it won’t never be good enough for him. Its gotten
to be a routine. Mostly, I just tune him out, but he’s gonna’ cut
into my study time tonight; so, I really need to get this done, Mom.”
Dwayne turned
back to his books and ignored his mother. Sadie Dunbar was almost
in tears. She knew her boy too well. She knew, in some
ways, he was just like his dad. He just slammed the door in her
face. She wouldn’t get another word out of him. She could
take a cold chisel and a hammer to him, but she wouldn’t get a thing
out of him. When Dwayne shut down, that was it. As a mother
she knew something was deeply troubling her boy, but he wouldn’t talk
to her.
It was almost
like he was afraid of something. Was it her husband? Had
Brad threatened Dwayne? Was all of Brad’s constant barrage of
ranting and raving having a really bad effect on her boy? Dwayne
seemed resigned to his hopeless situation. The boy shouldn’t have
to be living like that. She didn’t know what to do. She
knew Dwayne was bitterly opposed to her divorcing her husband
Rance. God, how she loved Rance. He was everything she ever
wanted in a husband and more. She still loved him in her
heart. Why did he have to throw it all away by letting Frank suck
his penis? It wasn’t the sex act that was the problem for her, it
was his unfaithfulness, even if it was with another man; however, Lord
knows, she would never consider something as vile as sucking her
husband’s penis. The mere thought of putting into her mouth a
part of her husband’s body he urinated from made her more than a bit
queasy. It was down right disgusting to her.
Dwayne told her
he would never forgive her if she didn’t find it in her heart to
forgive his dad and let things be. He just couldn’t understand
she was trying to protect him from his dad’s perversion. Lord
knows, if Rance let Frank do that to him, maybe he’d expect Dwayne to
do it, too. She quickly erased that thought from her mind as too
awful to think about. At least she knew she was safe with Brad in
that department. He was all man! Weren’t nothing queer
about Brad! He was a gung-ho Marine who would bristle every time
an obviously gay man came on television. He would make fun of
them and call them derogatory names. Her husband hated
gays.
Was this
Dwayne’s way of getting back at her for divorcing his dad? Was
Dwayne punishing her for marrying Brad? He begged her not to
marry the Colonel. He told her he would never accept him as his
dad. He never liked Brad from the first. He told her he
thought Brad was a phony and a liar. She knew Dwayne still
worshiped his dad. She just couldn’t understand why. She
explained to him over and over how his dad was a homosexual and that’s
why she had to divorce him. He liked to have sex with other
men. She was afraid he might try to have sex with Dwayne.
How could Dwayne tell her he could only hope and pray one day his dad
would share love with him? Sadie made damn
sure Dwayne didn’t get to read any of the many letters Rance sent him
over the years. Except, over the last two years, Rance only sent
a letter about twice a year. Nevertheless, she destroyed it
before Dwayne got a chance to read it. She wasn't doing it to be
mean. She was doing it to protect her boy. She didn’t want
him being perverted by his dad’s love. She made it clear she
didn’t want Dwayne to love Rance at all. What’s that going to do
to a child? Exactly the opposite. Why do kids put beans in
their ears? Because you told them not to. Dwayne certainly
knew he could never tell her about the several times he saved up his
money, took a bus to a nearby town to see his dad ride in a rodeo and
got to spend a little time with him. Those few, brief moments
with his dad, Dwayne treasured. He could tell how much his dad
loved him and wanted to tell him things, but he wouldn’t. He was
too much of a cowboy to say anything against his mother. That
only made Dwayne love his dad more.
If Dwayne still
feels bad about her marrying Brad, then he probably does feel like he’s
in their way, but that wasn’t her fault. According to Brad,
Dwayne fought him from the very beginning. He wouldn’t even try
to cooperate with his step-dad. Yet, every time Brad barked at
him, Dwayne never argued with him, he jumped right up and ran to try to
correct anything Brad complained about. She was so confused, and
she wasn’t looking forward to talking with Brad. She never knew
where he was coming from most of the time. He had a way of
twisting everything to make himself look blameless. She was
beginning to wonder if maybe Brad wasn’t right. Maybe she
couldn’t see the greater picture of Dwayne’s hatred towards his
step-dad and in turn maybe he really did hate her.
* * * * * * *
Brad Dunbar came
home in his usual manner of stomping into the house letting everyone
know the Colonel had arrived. He unlocked the door to the front
hall closet, took off his uniform jacket, his shoulder holster
containing his army regulation service revolver, hung it on a hook,
closed the door and locked it back like he’d done hundreds of times
before when he came home. Sadie met him in the hallway.
They greeted each other, hugged and Sadie gave Brad a quick kiss.
“How’s your
sister?” he asked.
“She’s getting
worse all the time, Brad. I don’t know how she’s held on this
long, she’s so thin and weak. You can almost see through her
skin.”
“When ju’ get
home?” he asked her.
“Shortly before
noon.” she answered. “I’m cooking your favorite for dinner.”
“Great! I
could use a good meal this evening.” he said flatly.
Sadie knew it
was a small jab at her not being home lately to prepare his evening
meal, and with Dwayne not around to fix it meant he had to fend for
himself. That was something the Colonel did not like to do.
He had men catering to his every whim at the base. He felt his
home life shouldn’t be much different. Sadie instinctively knew
that and tried her best to be a good military wife; although, she knew
when to draw the line with his over demanding bullshit.
“The boy
home?” he asked her.
“Yeah, Vince and
Casey brought him home after school and he and Casey did his chores
while I talked to Vince for a while.”
“I guess
Longhorn told ju’ a bunch of crap about me, huh?”
“No, Brad, he
didn’t say nothing about you. Vince wouldn’t, I know him too damn
well. He wouldn’t say nothing about nobody less’n it was good.”
Brad snorted at
Sadie’s comment about Vince Longhorn, got himself a beer from the
fridge and sat down at the kitchen table. He popped the top and
took a long slow pull from the can.
“You gonna’ go
down to the barn to see if the boys did the chores right?”
“Naw, what’s the
use? They never do ‘em like I want ‘em done no how. The last
couple of days Longhorn’s brought ‘em by, they done ‘em pretty
good. I always have to go back and do something they
forgot. I guess Longhorn got a guilty conscience, and’s think’n
he’ll suck up to me by bringing them to do the chores.”
“I don’t think
that, Brad. I think he just brought them by to be neighborly.
Vince ain’t the kind a’ man to suck up to nobody. Anyway, Casey
knows how you want the chores done. He’s a responsible kid.
He told me he made sure he and Dwayne did them just the way you told
‘em to.”
“Yeah, Casey’s a
pretty responsible boy most of the time. The trouble is, them two
gits to bullshit’n, forgets what they’re doing and don’t do it
right. I’m sick and tired of it, Sadie. I just ain’t gonna’
try no more. I’ll just go down there after I finish this beer and
take care of it myself. I get on Dwayne’s case and he rushes down
there pretending he’s gonna’ take care of it. Sometimes, it’s
even worse than before. I still have to do it over anyways.
I just ain’t gonna’ put myself through it no more. Ain’t never
seen nothing like it. It’s like that damn kid’s trying to test
me; like he’s try’n to see just how far he can push me.”
“Maybe if you
tried being a little nicer to Dwayne, Brad, he’d come around to your
way a’ seeing things.”
“Nice to
him? Hell, Sadie, can’t the damn kid see I’m try’n to make a man
out of him? If’n I didn’t care about him, woman,— I sure as hell
wouldn’t put myself through the frustration of try’n to shape his ass
up. He’s just got it set in his head, he ain’t gonna’ listen to a
damn thing I say and that’s it. He’s still got his head stuck so
far up his queer daddy’s butt he can’t see the light of day.”
“Brad, don’t say
that sort of thing in my house. Whether it’s true or not,
what his dad done ain’t none a’ yore’ business.”
“Okay, you win,
Sadie! Dwayne wins, too! I just ain’t a' gonna’ bother no
more. I still expect him to make an attempt at doing his
chores. He needs to learn some responsibility whether he takes it
seriously or not. I can see, by you getting Longhorn to take care
of him for the last week, you think I’m being too tough on him.
It’s a slap in my face, Sadie. You basically cut my balls off.”
“Don’t say that,
Brad! That’s horrible! That just ain’t so, and it ain’t
fair! I didn’t mean it that way, Brad, and you know it! I was
just worried you two didn’t seem to be git’n along too well and thought
it might be best if you spent some time apart; give each other a little
rest for a few days.”
“Well, I can
promise you one thing, I ain’t gonna’ get on his ass no more about his
chores; however, to make up for your slap in my face and him refusing
to do what I tell him, I expect you to tell him he has to stay home
this weekend. If you don’t give me say in his comings and goings,
Sadie, then make arrangements for Longhorn to take care of him from now
on. I won’t be responsible for him no more.”
“Brad, you don’t
mean that.”
“I do mean it,
Sadie. What am I around here? I bring my damn
paycheck home and sign it over to you every two weeks. I
take just enough for gas and money for a few personal things. I
eat on the base most of the time unless one of my fellow officers takes
pity on me and invites me out for lunch.”
“I know, Brad,
and I appreciate it. I try to do my best by you. You know I
love you, Brad.”
“Sometimes, that
ain’t enough, Sadie. A man’s gotta’ feel like he’s got some
importance in his own home. I keep getting my legs shot out from
under me around here, ever’ damn time I turn around.”
“Okay, Brad, you
win. I’ll tell Dwayne he has to stay home this weekend. I’m
gonna’ be leaving here to go back to my sister's Friday around
noon. She needs me, Brad. She ain’t got no one else to take
care of her. There’s a kindly neighbor lady who takes care of her
long enough for me to come home for a couple of days. It won’t be
forever, Brad. She can’t last too much longer.”
* * * * * * *
It was quite
around the Dunbar table for dinner that evening. Sadie told
Dwayne he had to stay home the next weekend and mind his
step-dad. Dwayne agreed without any emotion. Out of the
corner of his eye, he could see the Colonel giving him a sneer.
Dwayne ignored him and kept eating his dessert. They finished
dinner and Dwayne helped his mother clean up the kitchen. She
thanked him, gave him a hug and a kiss and sent him back to his room to
finish his homework.
Dwayne sat down
at his desk and started doodling. He picked up his cell phone and
dialed his brother’s cell phone number. Casey answered.
“Hey,
bro.” Dwayne said.
“Hey, bubba,
what’s up?” Casey responded.
“Give our little
bro a call. Tell him Operation Sideshow Bob is a go for this
weekend.”
End Chapter 13 ~
Texas Longhorns Copyright 2005 ~
Waddie Greywolf All rights
reserved ~ Mail to:
waddiebear@yahoo.com