Diary of Valerie Gurzakin
by Titmouse
(C)1999, All Rights Reserved
The following text was discovered on the hard drive
of a used computer I purchased. It had been deleted
but not permanently erased. Personally, I doubt the
authenticity of the document and assume it was the
creative effort of the previous owner. I submit it
here with only minor editing changes.
K123-347 (Local 960524)
I have to write it down somewhere, and it certainly
doesn't belong in official dispatches, so I have begun
this diary. Mostly, I admit, it is for my own benefit.
I want to relive and reconsider experiences outside the
scope of my mission and the interest of my superiors.
It might be important, though, should anything happen
to me, for there to be a record of this.
The subject, to be blunt -- and I can and intend to
be blunt in this private diary -- is sex.
I have tried in my dispatches to convey how
radically different sexual congress among humans is
from what we Nxtlaqu experience. Perhaps at some point
in our early development we were similarly preoccupied
but if so it must have been eons ago. We live so long,
conceive so readily and, because of that, copulate so
seldom that sex plays a negligible role in our culture.
The need for pleasure as a spur to mating disappeared
long before we spread beyond our own solar system and
has nearly disappeared. The sex act, for us, lasts
about as long and engenders about as much pleasure as a
good sneeze. The important thing is the choosing of a
mate and the result of mating, not the mating itself.
I was therefore unprepared for the rather notable
differences in the human approach to mating, where the
practice is not only undertaken for its own sake,
without regard to progeny, but often with extensive
efforts to prevent conception. At first, I found this
salaciousness repugnant. It pervades the entire
culture -- art in all forms, advertising, clothing,
technology, commerce. At times it all seems to be
undertaken for the sake of sex.
Yet, as time passed, I noticed a change come over
me. I was concerned, at first, that there might be
something wrong with my local physical being. When
medical tests failed to reveal a problem, I considered
alternative explanations, and was eventually forced to
conclude it was normal. That is, while I control this
body I inhabit completely at the mental level and
mostly at the physical level, it has some fundamental
urges and needs of its own.
Once I identified the source of the waves of
restlessness that came over me from time to time, and
once I determined that it presented no significant risk
to my mission, I decided to let my body have its way.
It was therapeutic and prophylactic. My body needed it
for both health and contentment.
It doesn't hurt, of course, that this body I inhabit
is young, healthy and -- in human terms, at least --
attractive. (Humans are rather ugly until you get used
to them, being thick of body, primitively muscled and
ape-faced.) I appear to be a female of about 25 years,
five feet eight inches tall, long dark-red hair, well-
proportioned. The circumference of my torso around the
bust is just under 36 inches, narrowing substantially
at my waist, and increases again to roughly 34 inches
around my hips.
This is nothing like what I used to look like before
I underwent the transfer, which is just as well. I
don't think the males of this species (or females, for
that matter) would have found me attractive in my
previous form. I certainly didn't find them attractive
to me for the first year I was here.
But, as I said, I came to feel differently. It was
a case of body over mind, instead of the other way
around. I caught myself, for example, noticing and
admiring the posteriors of some human males, an
activity so ludicrous I feared for my mental stability.
Gradually, it began to dawn on me that my physical body
was responding genetically to the call of the zygote.
Once I had identified what it was that was troubling
me, the next question was what to do about it.
That didn't take me long to answer. My next
question was how.
It wasn't long after that that the answer presented
itself. I was sitting in the park, feeding and talking
to the squirrels (They are real nuts!), when a human
male of about my apparent age stopped to talk with me.
His opening move was not clever: "Cute, aren't
they?" But I said "Yes," and we went on from there.
Before long, he sat down on the bench with me, and we
talked of squirrels, birds and -- when one came by and
chased away the squirrels and birds -- dogs. Then he
asked me if I wanted to have a drink or a cup of
coffee, pointing toward the cafes that lined the
sidewalk across from the park. I accepted.
Alcohol is a peculiarly human taste. Our experience
throughout the galaxy so far has turned up few examples
of widespread use of depressives for "intoxication."
Most cultures seem to prefer substances that expand
horizons rather than limiting them. My own native
culture has nothing of the sort, pleasure of any kind
beyond rarefied intellectual satisfaction being alien
to us.
I had become more comfortable at casual conversation
with humans during the past year. Eddie -- that was his
name, Eddie Fowler -- asked about me and my history, and
I lied generously. My name was Valerie -- Valerie
Gurzakin. I was from the Czech Republic, I told him,
but my parents were both Slovaks. Being a foreigner
explains a lot of things, I've found, from accent to
unfamiliarity with common references. No, I wasn't
from Prague (the only Czech city most Americans know
of, if any) but a small village in the north called
Zentac, which I pronounced as if it ended in 'sh.' I
had come to America as a student and now worked as a
translator for a company doing business in eastern
Europe. Eddie bought it all without question.
All the time we were talking, I was wondering if he
was going to be the one. I was pretty certain that he
was in favor of it, and I wanted to, sort of. I mean...
I'd never done this. Not just as a human, but as a
Nxtlaqtha. This, as you know, is my first real
assignment. Before coming to Earth, I was young, at
least in our terms. And there had never been an
opportunity or reason at the same time for me to get
around to it. I might have gone another 100 of our
years -- nearly 130 of theirs -- before I was really ready
to mate.
But this human body was ready. I could tell. I had
felt it pulling me for several months before I
understood. At first, I just knew it wanted something.
Later, I knew what it wanted. A man.
And I found I wanted to give my body a man. Well,
why not? It wouldn't interfere with my mission. On
the contrary, the information would be interesting and
probably useful. Certainly, it would be my most
intimate interaction with a human to date.
So I decided Eddie was going to get lucky.
I wasn't exactly sure how to proceed. Fortunately,
human males are generally the aggressors sexually. I
knew all I needed was to somehow communicate my
willingness and Eddie would take over.
So I turned to the side and pulled my shoulders back
as if stretching out a kink in my back, which made my
breasts jut forward in a manner I knew males find
compelling, and then leaned forward while talking with
him, pointing the opening of my blouse toward him and
giving him a good look into my cleavage. That got his
attention. And I looked him in the eyes, laughed at
his jokes, touched his hand on the table with mine, and
slowly dragged my fingertip across the back of his hand
when I withdrew it. Pretty soon, he was so obviously
interested that I would have laughed (Laughing is a
WONDERFUL human invention) except that I knew human men
don't like to be laughed at.
I was determined to enjoy the preliminaries, however
strange they might seem.
We sat down on his sofa, and Eddie immediately put
his arm around my shoulders, then pulled me toward him
and moved his face toward mine. I knew he wanted to
kiss, so I puckered my lips to meet his.
I could tell right away that he was a little
surprised, because he pulled back a little. Analyzing
it quickly, I decided that I was holding my lips too
firmly, so I let them relax. That seemed more like it,
because he pressed his mouth to mine again and sort of
wriggled it from side to side. Then I felt his slimy
tongue push forward from his mouth into mine.
Restraining the impulse to bite it, I stayed relaxed
and let him worm his tongue around in my mouth. Once I
got used to the idea, it felt pretty good.
We did that for a while, then Eddie sat back and, by
pulling on my shoulders, indicated that he wanted me to
turn the other way. I tucked my feet up onto the sofa
and turned to face him, lying across his lap. Eddie
wrapped his arms around me and recommenced his kisses.
This time, when he poked his tongue between my lips, I
licked back. He seemed to like that, and he also liked
it when I opened my mouth wider and let him probe
around the inside of my mouth.
The kissing and the close, warm feeling of our
bodies pressed together sent a pleasant tingle
throughout my body. I was slightly alarmed at first
but then realized that it was responding to the
caresses and intimacy. In particular, I noticed that
my sex organ developed a tendency to contract and relax
without my conscious will. It was also lubricating. I
could feel the dampness in my panties where the fabric
pressed against the outer lips of my vulva.
Eddie moved his hand to my stomach and stroked it in
slow circles, which did nothing for me. Then he slid
it slowly and tentatively upward until it came to rest
just under my left breast. I could feel the under
surface resting lightly on his hand, which I found
strangely thrilling.
While I knew, academically at least, that human
female breasts were considered part of the sexual
equipment, I had generally understood that to mean that
human males considered them such. The mammary fixation
of the male population was apparent, but my own
experience to that moment was that breasts were simply
somewhat inconvenient reserve equipment for nursing
infants and, other than that, had no role or purpose.
When Eddie slid his hand higher to cup my breast in his
palm and squeezed it gently with his fingers, I
discovered that my assumption was incorrect. It felt
good and resulted in more contracting and dampness at
my middle. I pressed my breast into Eddie's palm,
encouraging him to continue.
We continued to kiss and fondle for several minutes.
Actually, I did very little myself other than be
receptive, although I had a vague sense that I should
do something. My hands stroked Eddie's back and
gripped his head, but that didn't seem enough.
Before long, I felt Eddie's fingers fumbling at my
back and realized that he was trying to unbutton my
dress. Not knowing what else to do, I lay in his arms
passively and let him. He was not as adept as one
might have expected, but eventually he got the top
several buttons unfastened. His warm and slightly
moist palm stroked my back and shoulders, which I found
surprisingly sensuous, especially when he curled his
fingers and dragged his fingernails across the skin.
My body shuddered involuntarily and my shoulders
twitched several times in response.
Encouraged, Eddie unfastened the remaining buttons
down to the small of my back. Then, while maintaining
a particularly long and motile kiss -- presumably to
stifle any protest I might otherwise make -- Eddie began
to pull the top of my dress forward from my shoulders.
I made no protest -- indeed, I had no intention of
protesting -- and even helped by shrugging my shoulders
forward and then slipping my arms, one after the other,
out the short sleeves. The top half slid into my lap,
exposing my upper torso to the waist except for the
peach-colored brassiere that supported my mammaries. I
had chosen it carefully that morning -- an underwire
variety that exposed more of my breast flesh than
usual.
Relaxing his arms slightly and allowing my body to
drop backward, Eddie kissed his way to my ear, then to
my throat (which I found very pleasurable) and then
down across my thorax to the uncovered tops of my
breasts. His lips touched me lightly and nibbled their
way to the hollow between them. His tongue poked out
and licked down into the deep valley.
I kept telling myself to stop observing and simply
participate. I focused on the touch of his lips
against my skin and the firm, wet slide of his tongue
tip as it traced along my breast flesh. I felt like I
wanted to pull his face into me and press it against my
breasts, and so I did.
Shortly thereafter, Eddie's fingers slid to the
middle of my back and began to fumble at the band
stretched across it. I arched my back slightly to ease
the strain on the band, and he managed to release
without too much trouble the three hooks that held it
together. Propping me against his knees, Eddie pulled
both sides forward and away, slid the straps off my
arms, and then tossed my brassiere to the side. He
gazed admiringly at my bare breasts and smiled.
"Nice!" he said, speaking for the first time in
several minutes. "So pretty!"
I blushed at the compliment, pleased that he found
my upper torso attractive, and buried my face in his
shoulder. I was not feigning shyness. This was all
new to me, and I felt very uncertain about my proper
role and response. My assumption was that the human
male took the controlling role in sexual congress and
that what I needed to do was let him. But I was
finding that to be inadequate. First, I felt like I
should be doing something besides lie there. More, I
felt I wanted to do something, too. And I could sense
that Eddie was uncertain in the face of my passivity.
The answer was poking me in the side. Eddie had
slipped his arm around my shoulders again and was
cradling me against his chest, one hand cupping my
breast, his thumb stroking over the top and across the
nipple, which was swelling and sticking out and sending
pleasant, throbbing tingles through my body.
My nipples weren't the only thing swelling and
throbbing. I could feel Eddie's male organ against my
hip, a sizable lump that stiffened and relaxed and
stiffened again. Tentatively, I slid my hand from his
waist to the front of his pants and traced along the
swelling with a finger.
"Ummmmm," Eddie moaned, and kissed me more deeply.
That seemed encouraging, so I wrapped my fingers around
the lump, surprised by its length and girth. It was
quite a bit larger than illustrations had led me to
believe.
"Oooh, jeez," Eddie gasped, breaking the kiss just
enough to murmur against my lips. "That feels really
good!"
He moved his hips back and forth, which made his
penis slide inside my loose grip. Assuming that was
pleasurable, I mimicked the move, sliding my hand back
and forth, and was rewarded with another gasp. I was
surprised to feel pleased by my ability to give him
pleasure.
Eddie's lips were all over my exposed flesh -- at the
small hollow at the base of my throat, at the back of
my jaw, at the opening of my ear where his breath
sparked new tingles and the probing tip of his tongue
caused a shudder, at my breasts where he sucked and
nibbled and made more sparks course through me.
Gently, Eddie slid me across his lap and onto the
sofa seat. He kissed me again, pushing his tongue deep
into my mouth, and put his hand on my knee. His
fingers caressed the inside, stroking lightly. It felt
very nice to have him do that. I was again surprised
at this body and the unexpected pleasures that touches
in various locations produced.
As it turned out, the pleasure was repeated, even
intensified, at other locations along my inner leg as
Eddie slowly stroked and tickled his way higher. I let
my legs relax and gap open, allowing him easier access.
It was pretty clear where he was headed, and I was
interested in the result.
"Do you like that?" Eddie whispered in my ear.
"Ummmm," I answered. "Oh, yes. It
feels...delicious." I could feel his lips smile against
my ear, and then he stuck the tip of his tongue into
the canal, again. I was growing fond of that move,
which always sent tingles running up and down my spine.
Eddie's fingers inched higher, up between my thighs.
As I had surmised, he was working his way up to my sex
organ. He seemed tentative and cautious, as if I might
at any moment push him away. I had no intention of
removing his hand, which was producing increasingly
strong feelings -- strange sensations that were
completely novel to my experience. If anything, I was
more likely to grab his wrist and pull his hand up to
the target, eliminating the delay. On the other hand,
I was enjoying the slow, sensuous approach. I was
content to let him take his time. I spread my legs a
little wider, allowing my dress to rise up nearly to my
crotch.
Eventually, his fingers got there. Eddie slid a
finger under the elastic of my undergarment, ran it
through the hair above my sex and down along the side,
then brought it back across and stroked down along the
other side. I strained my hips forward, willing him to
touch it in the center. Instead, he withdrew his
finger and returned his hand to my upper thigh, where
he stroked and tickled some more.
Finally, though, he moved his hand upward and cupped
it over my sex organ. My hips pushed forward against
his touch as though they were operating independently
of me. Not that I tried to stop them. Eddie's fingers
pressed firmly against me and wriggled back and forth,
making the lips of my sex rub together. I found it
both enjoyable and frustrating. It wasn't quite
enough. I wanted his hand under the fabric, not on top
of it. I wanted it to touch me THERE, flesh against
flesh.
Then, finally, Eddie slid his hand up to the
waistband. His fingers wiggled their way under the
elastic and crept downward through the curly hair that
covered my pubis. The anticipation I felt was almost
unbearable.
Instead of touching the nearest point -- the top of
the opening, which I could already tell was especially
sensitive -- Eddie spread his fingers into a V and
pushed them down along either side. Gently, lightly,
his middle finger came to rest on the vertical slit
between my thighs.
"Ahhhhhh!" The sigh came from deep inside me.
Eddie increased the pressure slightly and slid his hand
up and down, which made his middle finger slip between
the lips of my sex. His finger probed inward, seeking
and finding the small, tight channel into my body.
Eddie had stopped kissing me and was looking
downward across my bare breasts to where his hand was
stroking and exploring inside my underpants. I felt a
stab of pain in my lower lip and realized that I was
biting it between my teeth. My thighs were quivering
with tension, my pelvis straining upward to meet his
touch. The sigh -- almost a groan -- that escaped me was
involuntary.
Eddie slid his hand upward and out of my undies,
tracing his finger through the slit as he did so and
managing to drag his fingertip across the little bump
that had sprung up near the top. An electric shock
jolted through me, making my whole body jerk in
response. I was amazed by the feeling of intense,
almost painful pleasure.
Meanwhile, Eddie started pushing my underpants down,
first on one side and then the other. I lay there,
physically passive but mentally urging him onward. It
eventually occurred to me that the process would go
faster if I raised my hips off the sofa. I did, and
Eddie slid my panties down my legs and off my feet.
Despite his hungry glance at what he had just
uncovered, I wasn't embarrassed to be so uncovered with
another. We have no modesty taboos among the Nxtlaqu,
clothing being not only unnecessary but in fact
impossible for my race.
Eddie would have soon distracted me in any case. He
brushed his fingers languorously up the inside of my
leg, starting from my ankle and arriving eventually
back at the top. Once there, his fingers sought and
found again the opening between my thighs, a process
that I assisted by spreading them wider. Eddie slipped
a finger between the lips again, dragged it up over the
bump again with the same result as before, and then
slid it downward and inward.
Now, I'd had my own fingers there before when I was
first getting acquainted with my new body. I recall it
was mildly pleasurable, but mostly I found the passage
almost dry and therefore difficult. I had only
penetrated a short distance, simply verifying that it
was there. At the time, I was more curious about where
the body's urine came out than with potential sexual
use.
This was entirely different, however. Eddie's
finger slipped easily back and forth in the plentiful
lubrication that had accumulated. There was
resistance, to be sure, when he pressed his fingertip
inward, but that was mostly because of the tightness of
the channel. Repeatedly sliding in and out spread the
lubrication around, and each time he returned to the
opening his finger penetrated a little farther.
I found myself mentally urging his fingertip on,
wanting all of it inside me. I began rocking my hips
back and forth, helping Eddie work his finger deeper
and deeper. My breath, I noted, had become uneven.
Gradually, Eddie sank his middle finger into my
vagina as deep as it would go. Once there, he rotated
it inside me, pressing against and stretching the
encircling wall of muscle. I was surprised to discover
that, while having his finger inside me was just what I
wanted and certainly pleasant, the most intense
feelings of pleasure came from the opening of the
channel, from the fleshy lips that surrounded it, and
most of all from the little bump of flesh near the top
of the opening, which was now more swollen than ever.
Eddie was apparently more familiar with female
equipment than I was, since he kept running his thumb
across the bump from time to time. The fact that I
sighed or moaned every time he did so no doubt
encouraged him. My body, with no direction from me,
wiggled and wriggled and jumped in response.
"You like that, don't you?" Eddie said, which was
almost exactly what he'd said the last time he'd
spoken, minutes before. Well, he was still right. In
truth, I was half stunned by the intensity of the
pleasure, far stronger than I'd ever imagined, that
spread through my body in waves emanating from my
center, where his finger churned in my sex. I couldn't
answer Eddie's question, only squeeze at his shoulders,
where I was hanging on for dear life.
"Well, then, let's see how you like this!" Eddie
said, sliding his finger out of me. I was about to
tell him that I didn't much care for it, but then he
slid of the couch and moved between my legs. I
realized quickly that he was going to do something else
to me. I assumed we were ready for the main event.
Wrong.
Eddie grabbed my hips and pulled me closer to the
edge of the sofa. My legs gapped open, giving him a
clear look at my wet and (I noticed) somewhat fragrant
sex. I expected him to unfasten his pants and reveal
the lump, and I was looking forward to my first non-
textbook look at the male sex organ with great
curiosity.
Instead, Eddie bent forward and began to kiss and
lick and nibble all around my middle. I almost laughed
in surprise. I had a sudden thought that perhaps Eddie
didn't know what he was supposed to do and that I, of
all creatures, might have to explain it to him. It
felt good but, after all, that was hardly the point.
But then Eddie stuck out his tongue and licked it
across my precious little bump, and I decided -- What the
hell, I could explain it to him later. He poked his
tongue deep into my channel and worked it around up in
there, then licked my bump again. Whee!
Eddie began a steady attack on my sex with his
mouth, sucking the lips in and gnawing gently, probing
and licking with his tongue. He used his fingers to
spread the lips open and licked my slit from top to
bottom and from bottom to top, pausing occasionally to
lash my lovely, adorable, marvelous little bump with
his squirmy, wormy tongue. I lay there limply, arms
collapsed at my sides, my knees spread outward loosely,
while Eddie nuzzled my... my...
It WASN'T my sex organ, I decided suddenly. It
wasn't my vulva, my vagina, my slot, or even my slit.
It was my PUSSY! It was my CUNT! He had his tongue in
my CUNT, and I LOVED it! I wrapped my hands around the
back of Eddie's head and pressed his face into my
PUSSY. It felt GOOD! (Memo to HQ: We may have lost
something here.)
Eddie sensed my change in attitude, I think. It
wasn't that I'd seemed reluctant before. On the
contrary, I had encouraged and permitted him every step
of the way. But now I was READY!
He raised up on his knees, his face glistening with
our combined juices, and began to tear open his belt.
With quick moves, he popped the top button of his
pants, dragged down the zipper with a sharp rasp, and
shoved his pants down to his knees. When he
straightened up, I saw it. My god!
I flinched. My knees would have snapped shut if
Eddie hadn't been between them. I had assumed the
pictures were close-ups, magnified to show the detail.
After all, the textbooks said the male sex organ was
normally three or four inches long.
Eddie's penis was at least twice that, and it stuck
straight out from his body, even a few degrees above
horizontal. It seemed to vibrate with energy. It was
flush and crimson, the head almost purple, and it
jumped and jittered and strained like a prancing horse,
eager to plunge into me. Into my poor, wee little
never-before-penetrated tight virginal slit. I knew
there was no way it was going to fit in there. It
would damage me, tear me, split me.
Eddie seemed completely unconcerned about potential
damage. He put his hands on my thighs and knee-walked
forward, pressing deeper between my legs. In self-
defense, I reached out and wrapped my hand around his
penis and felt for the first time that strange,
velvety, soft-covered steel. The skin slid over a
harder core, back and forth.
It was enough to make Eddie pause for a moment. His
head went back, eyes closed, and he pumped his hips
back and forth several times, making his erection slide
within my grip.
"Jeez, Valerie," he hissed through bared teeth.
"Oh, god! Your hand feels so good!"
I found that, despite my fear, his penis felt good
in my hand, too. I squeezed my fingers more tightly
and moved my hand back and forth along its length. The
little slit on the tip of it winked open, and I saw a
drop of fluid emerge like a tear from a vertical eye.
"Damn! I just gotta!" Eddie said. He brushed my
hand away, replaced it with his own, and scooted
closer. I felt the shaft nudge between my thighs and
the soft tip bump against the wetness at my center. He
worked the head up and down with his hand, sliding it
in the lubrication. He pushed with his hips and it
slid upward and across my bump. Chills raced up and
down my spine.
Eddie pushed down on his penis, and I felt the head
find and lodge in the opening. I had a moment of panic
before I realized that I was perfectly competent to
stop this any time I wanted to. A quick chop to the
side of his neck and Eddie would be unconscious. A
little harder chop and he would cease to be. If it was
too much, I'd tell him to stop. If that didn't work,
I'd do what I had to do.
I hadn't gone this far to quit without really
trying. I could take it if an ordinary human female
could, I told myself.
"Please," I said, my voice cracking from not having
spoken in so long. Eddie, penis in hand, had started
to press forward. He hesitated and looked at me.
"I've... never done this before."
The change was immediate and encouraging. Eddie's
whole attitude seemed to soften.
"You're a... a virgin?" he asked, not really believing
it.
"Yeah," I said.
"Well..." His eyes darted from side to side,
uncertain.
"I want to," I said. "But I'm afraid. You're so
big."
Eddie blushed. I liked that.
"I... I'll go slow," he said.
"Will you?"
"Yes."
I hesitated.
"Okay."
"You sure?"
"Yes."
Eddie moved forward again, guiding himself with one
hand, leaning on the other. Again, I felt the blunt
head press against me. Again, he moved it up and down,
snuggling between the lips of my opening and wetting
the head with my juice. Then he pressed the head
downward slightly, and I felt it center at the
entrance.
Then, rather than poking forward with his hips to
push into me, Eddie let his weight slowly and gradually
settle downward. The pressure increased so little, so
painlessly, that I relaxed. And felt the head of his
stiff rod slip into the opening. I opened my thighs
to welcome him and pushed my hips up to meet him and --
YOW! -- jerked back instantly as a sharp pain shot
through me from just inside the opening.
My eyes must have reflected my panic as I looked up
at Eddie. He held himself there above me and made
calming noises.
"It's okay, it's okay," he said. "It's just your
cherry. We've got to break it, but it'll be over soon.
It's like a Band-Aid. Do it slow and it hurts. Do it
quick and it doesn't."
I knew that; I'd just forgotten. About the hymen, I
mean. I knew it was there, or at least assumed it was.
And I knew that it was torn in a woman's first
intercourse, sometimes caused a little bleeding, but
was no big thing. At least that's what the books said.
But right now, I had this thing sticking in my body
threatening to hurt me up inside where I felt most
vulnerable.
Eddie gulped. "We don't have to," he said. "We can
quit if you don't want to." I could tell he didn't
want to say that. But I also thought he meant it.
"No," I said, "I really want to. I... I've gone this
far. I have to do it sometime. It might as well be
now."
Eddie looked down at me, so vulnerable beneath him,
and gave me a funny, touching smile.
"It won't be so bad," he said, trying to sound
reassuring. "Look, put your legs up, around my waist.
I'll do it quick, and then it'll be over. And...and
you'll be glad. It'll be fine after that, I promise.
You'll forget all about it. You'll like it."
Gathering my courage, I did what he asked. Lifting
my heels up into the air, I wrapped them around his
waist and locked my ankles. I felt completely
vulnerable.
"Relax," he said. I let out the breath I'd been
holding, let myself fall back against the sofa.
With a quick jerk forward of his hips, Eddie drove
his hard pole into me. There was a sharp prick of pain
that was immediately replaced by wonder and awe as his
penis slid inside.
I tensed again, more from astonishment than fear,
and Eddie froze, suspended above me, quivering but not
pushing inward.
"Relax," he said. "I'm not going to hurt you."
I couldn't say anything. The lump in my throat felt
as big as the lump in my pussy. But I wanted it.
Unable to speak, I relaxed my knees, which had clasped
his hips in fear. I sighed, and opened to him again.
Eddie pulled back slightly, pressed forward just a
little farther, pulled back again, pressed farther. I
felt him invading me, a living thing, velvet-covered
steel. It was strange, scary and incredibly exciting.
It was so... intimate... this invasion of my body by
another, this joining of two separate beings into one.
My mind was reeling, but my body knew what to do.
Together this time, we each pulled back slightly and
then pushed forward -- a mutual, willing joining. I
felt him slide deeper into me. Looking down between
us, I could see he was almost halfway in.
Although I felt stretched, there was no pain. Far
from it. What I felt instead was an intense longing
for more. I wanted Eddie to stretch me to the fullest
extent possible. I wanted him all the way up inside
me. My sexual equipment, I realized in a sudden flash,
was designed for this. However intimidating his
erection had seemed at first, it was clear that my body
could accommodate it.
Eddie pulled back again and pressed forward, each
time going slightly deeper. I felt his penis probing
into me, spreading me where I had never been opened
before, all the way, all the way into me, stretching
me open, plunging into my depths, making me feel like
nothing else ever had. I can't really describe it.
It was wonderfully, womanly sexy. I had a man inside
me, doing what men and women do. I was getting fucked.
I loved it.
Eddie held still, buried all the way in me, until he
felt me relax again.
"Okay?" he asked.
"Yeah," I said. "I'm fine."
"Can I...?"
"Yes," I said. "Oh, yes. Go ahead. Do it."
I wasn't really sure what he was going to do, but I
was very sure I wanted whatever it was. I admit to
being slightly confused about how long the process was
supposed to take. I knew the end result, of course.
Was he going to do that now, ejaculate in me?
What he was going to do, it turned out, was to begin
slowly sliding his penis in and out of me. Eddie
slowly pulled back, drawing his erection gradually out
until just the head remained inside. I felt a terrible
sense of loss. No, no, don't leave... And then, just as
slowly, he pushed back inside me, spreading,
penetrating, pushing down into my center, generating an
incredible sense of fulfillment and pleasure and
downright primitive sexuality. Then pulled back again
and pushed in again.
Slowly and steadily, Eddie began to pump into me.
Gradually, he increased the tempo, pushing his stiff
flesh rod into my opening. At first, I was aware of a
tenderness inside, presumably where he had torn my
maidenhead. But that quickly passed, drowned out by a
rising feeling that I had no name for, no experience
of.
Eddie buried himself in me, pressing his pubic mound
against mine, forcing my legs wide, spreading me open
to his attack. The pressure against my supersensitive
flesh, especially the bump of exquisite sensation at
the top of my notch, sent waves of pleasure rolling
through my body. I wrapped my legs tightly around his
waist, pressing him into me, goading him with my heels.
Awash in my liquid slipperiness, Eddie's rigid penis
pistoned in and out of me, dragging along the bump and
sending out sharp shocks of pleasure. He plummeted in
and out, faster and faster, his body smacking into
mine, driving into me. I matched his rhythm, pushed my
pelvis up to meet his thrusts, reveling in the feel of
his flesh slipping inside my tunnel.
Eddie was grunting with animal passion in time to
his thrusts, "Ah! Ah! Ah!" His body covered mine,
pressed into me, but I pulled at him, wanting more,
wanting him, it almost seemed, to thrust all the way
through me and merge his body with mine.
Then, still hammering me relentlessly, he threw back
his head, baring his teeth in a grimace that looked
more like pain than pleasure, and with a cry from deep
inside, shot his sperm into my pussy. I felt it, felt
his penis twitch and spasm within my sensitive grasp,
felt him hunch and jerk out of control as he jetted and
spurted inside me.
I dressed quickly. I wanted to get away by myself
and think about all that had happened today. Picking
up my purse, I cast a quick glance around to make sure
I hadn't left anything, and headed for the door. Eddie
watched me with a strange look on his face, but hugged
and kissed me goodbye and opened the door for me.
"Uh... Can I see you again?"
I paused, halfway out the door.
"You mean like this?"
"Well, sure. I mean, I'd like to see you, go out,
do things together. But..."
"But you'd want to do this -- have sex -- again?"
"Uh, yeah. Of course. Didn't you... I mean, wasn't
it good for you?"
"Yes, I enjoyed it, and thank you," I said. "I
wanted to do that very much. But I'm not sure I want
to again."
"Huh?"
"That seemed pretty close to perfect to me," I said.
"I'd hate to spoil it by trying to match it. Do you
know what I mean?"
"Frankly, no," Eddie said. "I mean, it was good,
for a first time, but... Well, there's lots we didn't
do."
"You mean, there's more?" It was my turn to be
puzzled.
"Hell, yes."
"Hmmmm," I said. This was something that would
require more thought.
Author's Note:
I had fun with this and hope you did, too. Of course, we would
almost certainly seem pretty strange to any alien culture. But,
I thought, inhabiting another species body might have unexpected
consequences. Much of our behavior, we know, is prompted if not
controlled by genetics, which exerts far more control than our
recently developed brain in determining what we feel and do.
---
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