A letter, unsent...

My dearest love,

I just wanted to write these words to commit them to paper or, in this case to commit them to diskette. If you ever read them, you will not know for sure if they were meant for you because you will have come across them accidentally.

We have been such wonderful friends online for oh so many months now. We've shared small moments of our lives. We've talked about our goals for our futures. We've admitted our love for one another in terms of our friendship.

But now, has come the time for me to admit how deep that love is, at least for me.

When we met last summer, the circumstances were not ideal. You were on your trip to meet someone you thought you might fall in love with and I was on a similar trip. Although we both know now that neither of those relationships worked out, we didn't know then. All we knew for certain was that we had been friends and confidants for over a year and we wanted a little time alone to have a quiet talk. And that was what we did. We drove off for a quiet morning and had a pleasant leisurely talk.

What follows is what I wish had happened:

We arrived at the picnic area in just a short time. Ordered something to drink and sat down to talk. You began to tell me about some new computer programs you had tried, and I talked about my job and friends and coworkers. I watched you carefully, memorizing every detail of your face, your hands, the way you talked, the way your mouth moved. As you talked, I could feel my mind wander, imagining what it would be like to touch you and hold you.

Slowly, I reached across the table and touched your hand. A small gesture of friendship, to punctuate the conversation. But, instead of moving away, I just left it there, lightly touching your hand, softly caressing your fingers, one by one. You paused in your conversation but my look spurred you on. I was giving you my undivided attention, seemingly absent-mindedly stroking your fingers. Apparently you didn't want me to stop, so I continued, turning your hand over in mine, caressing your palm, teasing each finger.

I looked at you - through you - dreaming of how I would feel with those fingers caressing me. How strong but gentle you would be as you first slid my shirt over my head and slowly removed my bra, releasing my large breasts. I watched you continue to talk as I dreamed of those lips and that tongue sliding over my nipples. I could feel them harden as if anticipating what might happen.

Finally unable to stand the dilemma, I whispered to you to please shut up and kiss me. Clasping that hand I had been touching for so long, I pulled you up from the table and walked you back over to the car. It was parked away from the crowd and I pulled you close to me as I leaned back against the door. "Kiss me," I said again, wondering if you had even heard me the first time. You leaned toward me and softly touched your lips to mine. My hands automatically slid up around your neck, finding themselves where they had wanted to be for the past hour, tangling in your hair. I softly ran my tongue over my lips and then pulled you close again, returning the kiss, holding you there.

Oh, how I wanted you then. I softly parted my lips, holding your face close, and you finally let your tongue creep out, running it across my lips as if to "test the waters" and see where I wanted this kiss to go. My tongue reached out as well, inviting yours into my warm, waiting mouth. We were learning, experiencing, finding out things we had never said to each other. Our bodies were telling each other that we had finally found where we wanted to be, in each other's arms. We kissed for what seemed an eternity. I'm not sure we ever breathed until we both pulled back and looked into each other's eyes and gasped for air.

My heart was pounding. My breasts were aching to be caressed. My nipples were straining to be set free from the confines of the bra and licked and sucked. And I was wet - - oh, how wet I'd become, just thinking about how you would feel inside me.

You must have read my mind. You mumbled something about "more" and "secluded" and reached around to open my car door and help me get in. You drove without saying a word until we reached my hotel. You ushered me into the elevator, pressed the button for my floor, and then pulled me toward you and devoured me in a kiss that answered any questions I might have still had. My arms pulled you close and I could feel you press against me and realized that you wanted me as much as I did you.

We broke our kiss as the elevator came to a stop, and I was happy that my room wasn't far down the hall. I found the key and gave it to you. You opened the door and let us in and we immediately continued our kiss. After locking the door, you silently but gently pulled me over toward the bed. I love a king-sized bed, and this one took up most of the space in the room. We sat at the foot of the bed and looked at each other. I reached out and touched that face. I knew then, that I wanted to look at that face for the rest of my life. And as you leaned forward to kiss me again, I placed a finger on your lips, holding you back just a moment, so that I could finally tell you, "I love you more than anything else. I want to be with you, not just for this afternoon, not just for a few days, but forever." You nodded in agreement, kissed me gently, and said that you felt the same way. All our conversations, all the chatting, and sharing, and laughing and crying with each other had made you realize that you never wanted to let me go.

I pulled you back with me onto the bed. You lay back watching me as I slowly unbuttoned your shirt and then slid my hands inside to feel your warm skin. You reached out to slide my shirt over my head and then unfastened my bra and tenderly reached out to cup my breasts in your strong hands before leaning down to kiss each one, your tongue reaching out and licking the nipples, then your teeth gently nipping at them before taking them each into your mouth and sucking them until they were so hard and sensitive.

I was becoming wetter by the minute, squirming around on the bed, my legs finding yours and wrapping around them. You reached down and slid my slacks off and quickly followed with my panties and then you slid your hand down my stomach and toward my wet slit. You slowly moved your fingers until you felt me pressing up against you. You slid them along the folds of the lips that so desperately wanted to feel you while at the same time my hands were busy removing your pants and reaching down to caress your hard cock. I whispered in your ear, "I want to feel that inside me." You didn't hesitate any longer, but moved over me and leaned down to kiss me deeply while my hands still stroked the length of your hardness and then reached around to lightly scratch across the cheeks of your ass. My hips moved up so that the head of your cock touched my wet lips. You teased me a bit by rubbing the head across the swollen folds and then pressing it against my clit as it was beginning to peek out. My whole body quivered in anticipation and then you could hold back no longer.

Oh how you filled me with that hard cock. You thrust into me and I pulled you in tight. We stayed like that for several seconds, just savoring the feeling of being together, knowing that as soon as we began to move, we would never have this feeling again. I looked at your face hovering over me and told you that I loved you and that I was ready to show you. We began to move together as if meant for one another. Our pace quickened and slowed automatically, like we had known each other forever and knew just when to slow down to make this moment last. You rubbed your cock against my clit with each stroke and soon I was making small moaning sounds and telling you I wanted to feel you fill me with your hot cum.

I desperately wanted to feel you cum in me, to lose control. And cum, you did. I told you I was ready and you quickened your pace and thrust into me with more force and I was soon writhing under you, my hips pushing against you frantically, and we both were overcome with sensations. I felt light-headed as wave after wave of the most incredible orgasm passed through me and straight to the center of our attention. My body grasped your hard cock and squeezed with each rapid heartbeat. We both moaned and bucked like two crazed animals. I never wanted this moment to end. I felt you grow thicker and you stopped moving for just a short moment before exploding inside me with hot spurts. I wrapped my legs around your ass and pulled you in closer and pulled your face toward mine to kiss you and suck on your tongue. You thrust your tongue in my waiting mouth as you continued to thrust your hard cock in and out of me, my body sucking the last of your cum out as my mouth sucked your tongue in.

We held each other close and fell asleep in each other's arms.

Wide awake now, I know this never happened, but I am certain that someday I will have another chance to really let you know how I feel. And I won't miss out a second time.

I love you, my dearest friend, and you will soon know, I hope.

ps - - I hope someday I will be able to show you this letter and you will know how I felt about that day we met.



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