Six year old Hailey was my girlfriend's daughter from her previous marriage. Her mother and I have been together now for nearly a year. Although most boyfriends in such situations would hope that the daughters resembled their mothers (partly out of insecurity over not wanting constant reminders that another man had put a child, along with his penis, into his mate), I for one was glad that Hailey took on more of her biological father's traits.

Don't get me wrong; her mother was quite attractive. Not exactly a stunning bombshell, but attractive to me in a cute and quirky kind of way. She wasn't overweight and still kept the slim pre-pregnancy figure of her youth. So why exactly was I glad for the way Hailey turned out?

Well for one, Hailey inherited her father's tall physique and long limbs. While my girlfriend stood at just over 5 feet tall, Hailey's father was an impressive 6 feet, 4 inches. But it was his overall proportions; long-legged and slender, that were passed onto his daughter. Although she was only in the 1st grade, Hailey lacked the typical babyfat and other cherubic characteristics of her classmates, was tall for her age, and possessed long, coltish legs that gave her a graceful gait when she walked. Lastly her face was just enough of a hybrid between both parents that I didn't see her father's face staring back when I gazed into her cappuccino brown eyes.

Appearances aside, let me tell you the bigger reason why, as ashamed as I am to admit, I could possibly be more in love with Hailey than I was with my own girlfriend. My girlfriend was, for lack of a better phrase, frigid in bed. This did not mean she had a cold heart, but that she was completely unadventurous in lovemaking and possessed the libido of a chair. Early on in our relationship she was the pursuer, and as such was more willing to do things that she thought boyfriends liked (oral sex). But so dreadful was she in her technique and so awkward our conversations to spice things up, that sex eventually became routine and predictable and I realized our relationship would not be one based on physical passion.

Hailey on the other hand seemed to have inherited the wild fire of her father. She was excitable, funny, temperamental, and always unpredictable. I also sensed that when she grew, she would also have her father's unquenchable sex drive. From what I've learned over the months, it turned out that Hailey's father was quite the sexual lothario, who years earlier had seduced my girlfriend (who had just graduated high school) as one of his many conquests. A night of carelessness led to pregnancy, and he was pressured by his conservative parents to make an honest woman out of her. But a youthful marriage with no foundation and such sexual incompatibility did not last, and he went on to divorce her and move on to dozens of younger conquests.

Hailey was not yet at the age where she could understand her thirst and the "special feelings coming from between her legs." But the first moment that I sensed her libido was when I was incidentally watching her favorite kids' TV show with her sitting on my lap while only wearing cotton panties under her thin summer dress. I was wearing a pair of gym shorts sans boxers. I had grown an erection due to her frequent shifting on my lap and it was trapped between my thighs and her vulva just above.

The inappropriateness of this seated position only seemed to make my erection harder and thicker, and my penis reflexively pulsated in its confined groove; the tip of the head pushing my polyester shorts upward and brushing up against her panties. After a few moments Hailey excused herself to go use the bathroom, which I thought nothing of until she was gone for quite a lengthy period.

She returned eventually appearing a bit short of breath and resumed her seat on my lap (by then she had been gone so long that my erection had subsided). Curious that I didn't hear the toilet flush, I made the excuse of taking a pee myself and went to check up on the bathroom she just used. The toilet seat was left up, there weren't any tissues in the wastebasket (in case she need to wipe her nose or hands), and also no odors indicating she had taken a poop. She'd certainly been gone long enough to take several poops. The towels on the rack were completely dry and so she had not washed her hands. Not quite sure what to make of this, I dismissed my suspicion as lewd fantasy gone too far and rejoined her on the sofa and continued watching TV.

Still, my curiosity over what she had been up to and her body language upon her return lingered throughout the next day. So again, in the afternoon after I picked her up from school and we were watching TV, I had her on my lap. I should explain something though beforehand; I was Hailey's babysitter on weekdays because my girlfriend was a returning student who was attending nursing school at the local community college. Since I worked part time on the swingshift at a retail store from 6-10 pm, the time from when I picked her up (2 pm) to when her mother came home (and I would leave for work; 5:30 pm), was continuous, exclusive uninterrupted time between Hailey and I.

To continue what I had been describing, Hailey was again sitting on my lap when I decided to test my hypothesis. The scene on TV was incidentally a cartoon racing sequence, so I told the little girl that I would simulate a racecar ride by bouncing my legs up and down as fast as they could move. Hailey was delighted by this and even grabbed onto an imaginary steering wheel in front of her to navigate around an imaginary racetrack. As she was busy making cute 'vroom vroom' noises, my upper thighs were busy rubbing and slapping against her lower buttocks and in between her legs.

Suddenly, she hopped off me without warning and informed that she again had to "use the bathroom." This time while she had the door closed I followed her and put my ear up against the door. There were no sounds of urine trickling into the bowl, nor the light grunting sounds of defecation, nor brushing of teeth, nor faucet water even running. I did however hear the unmistakeable sounds of heavy breathing. Promising to investigate further I quickly returned to my seat before she could unexpectedly open the door and catch me spying.

Since the weather was warm I told Hailey that I would quickly go change into something lighter and returned wearing the shortest pair of shorts I could find. I further hiked them up when sitting so that my upper thighs were exposed. Then I invited my 6 year old darling to return to her "driver's seat."

I felt it almost immediately. The wetness. It streaked the bottom of her panties as it made contact with my right upper thigh. My mind was confused. Was that even possible? She was only 6! To my knowledge I had not started masturbating until I was at least 9 (or so I remember)!

I need visual confirmation. And so the following day I had hidden my VHS camcorder camera just behind a partially opened cabinet in the bathroom and set it to auto record. The tape had enough storage to capture nearly 2 hrs of footage so I had the luxury of starting it long before she had to use the bathroom again.

We were watching her usual 3 pm cartoon when again I told her that I would pretend to be a ride and this time simulated the hopping motions of a galloping horse. I told her to get on just my right knee and shook it up and down at a furious pace, trying to make as much abrasive contact with her outer vulva as much as possible.

All it took was just a minute of this "pony ride" before Hailey excused herself to the bathroom, returning over 10 minutes later. Later that day at work, I immediately played back the recorded camera footage as soon as I drove into my store's parking lot. My most salacious suspicions were confirmed!

There she was, my girlfriend's angelic 6 year old beauty, standing in front of the bathroom sink with her eyes closed and her beige khaki school pants and Dora the explorer panties pulled down to the ankles. She was pulling apart her pussy lips with the index and middle fingers of her left hand and feverishly rubbing the center with the index finger of her right! Although the back of the medicine cabinet door partially occluded the camera's viewing angle, I was technically looking at child pornography!

The lewd yet innocent footage ran for over 10 minutes (the same length of time she was in the bathroom) and when Hailey finally concluded, she bent down to reach her panties with both hands and for just a split second I was able to view her slit before her bowing head blocked the view, and when it came up her panties were again at her waist. Her pants followed, and without washing her hands, the little girl nonchalantly opened the bathroom door and exited as if nothing occurred.

The shocking image distracted me all through my shift that night. Did she even realize what she was doing, I wondered? Was she doing it purely for the sensation; much as a dog scratches its butt on the carpeted floor? Surely her mother would never have taught her anything like that. Perhaps her father?! The idea was so vulgar that I immediately wiped it from mental imagery. Hailey's father only had her for 2 weekends a month. No, he may be a promiscuous man-slut but he would never entertain such things with his own daughter, I thought.

Since that night I could never look at Hailey the same way again. Her face and lower body; her cute bald slit especially, became a haunting obsession. I felt ashamed to admit that I wanted her to do that again, but with eyes open and in plain view of me! I couldn't believe where my mind was drifting ... I ... I wanted to be the one doing that to her! Later that Friday when it was our "lovemaking" night of the week, I was fucking my girlfriend in the missionary position (as she lay with eyes closed and in complete silence) but imagining the entire time that in some alternate universe, it was that tight, forbidden 6 year pussy of her daughter's that I was breaking for the first time. I climaxed in record short time that night, which seemed to bring only relief to my girlfriend, as she bid me goodnight and rolled to her side to sleep.

I couldn't think about anything but Hailey after that. Whether I was alone at home, at work, or babysitting her she would be my constant obsession. I would look at her face as much as possible when she was nearby, appreciating more and more just how beautiful she was and playing games in my head where I would age enhance her by one year, then two, then five, and imagining how she would appear as she sucked me and fucked me at each of her stages of the lifespan.

I imagined me standing up while carrying her in my arms and fucking her small body as a 10 year old. I imagined brushing my cock past her emerging soft pubic hair at age 12 as I fucked her missionary style. I imagined fucking her in doggiestyle and grabbing onto the side of her hips which would be taking on a rounded, womanly shape by age 15. I imagined her fucking me in cowgirl with her full breasts jiggling up and down at age 17. And strangely, I imagined her with her head and shoulders on the floor, buttocks in the air, and legs splayed wide in the piledriver position as I fucked her in her ass, balls deep .. at age 6.

I masturbated repeatedly to the various imageries of Hailey, and never again would I have sex with my girlfriend without my mind replacing her face with her daughter's. I viewed the footage on my camera over and over. I "studied" this little girl day and night. I memorized her body language; like the adorable way she squirms when she's impatient. I memorized the melody of her breaths and her soft moaning from the video clip. Things eventually reached a point where it was impossible to have Hailey in the same room without me secretly undressing her with my eyes and viewing her in a sexual manner. And all the while her innocent eyes would stare back at me and smile (or she would mock me by sticking her tongue out).

I might even credit this little girl on saving my relationship on multiple occasions. On the times that my girlfriend and I would fight, and things would get so heated that we each threatened to end things, all I could think of was never getting to see my Hailey again, which would push me eventually to reconcile.

One day my obsession grew so deep, and my frustrations at not having her for myself so strong (the mental equivalent of getting blue balls), that I did something completely brazen and reckless. As Hailey was playing one of her educational video games on the computer, I approached her at her side and asked which game she was playing. Something about a monkey grabbing bananas and solving math problems, she answered. Just then, her gaze shifted right as her head still remained fixed on the monitor. I knew she must have seen it, she had to. I had the full length of my erection poking perpendicularly out of my body and pushing against my elastic gym shorts that it formed a sideways "tent pole." In case it was out of her visual field I even clenched my anal sphincter muscles which caused the erection to slightly bob up, then down.

She must've noticed the motion, because her curious head then turned to the right and the erection nearly took one of her eyes out. She appeared confused at first, before her pupils dilated in shocked surprise and she immediately trained her gaze back on the monitor, not knowing what to say or whether to even acknowledge she saw what she saw. I played it casual and continued to ask details about her game, which she answered but tentatively and with clear anxiety in her voice.

I thought all that night about whether I should've been so careless. What if she told her mother? But thinking about my foolishness made me think about Hailey again. I quietly slipped out of bed without waking my girlfriend and left the room to pace back and forth in the darkness of the hallway. Faintly glowing at the other end of this hallway was the night light emminating from the 1st grader's bedroom (she always slept with her door open so that if she had a nightmare her mother could hear it and come to her side). Unable to control my impulse, I quietly entered her room to notice her sleeping peacefully on her side, her mouth slightly agape and her right arm hanging over the edge of her bed.

With paternal instinct stirring in me, I approached to put her arm back under the covers, when I noticed that her fingers felt slick to the touch. "No, it can't be", I thought. But why not? Was this not the same girl whom I already had visual evidence of masturbating? I stooped down to place my mouth at even level with her hand, then guiding her finger under my nostrils took a deep inhale.

There was no mistaking it. It was more pleasant smelling and not as heavy as that of an adult woman's, but it was still the undeniable fragrance of pussy. I did something then that was even more dangerous and my most reckless move yet; I guided my throbbing erection from out of my boxers and held the organ inches from this gentle girl's lips. My cock was casting a shadow on her cheek due to the location of her night light. With my heart racing a mile a second, I cautiously reached my penis further and further forward until the head of my organ made just the lightest brush tap against her lower lip. I quickly broke contact out of sheer fear, but allowed the meat to linger just under her nostrils so that she could breathe in my scent just as I had her's.

I could only stomach to do this for a few seconds until rising panic attack got the better of me. I hurriedly retreated from her room and returned to mine, dropping my cock back into my boxers as I walked back down the hallway. For the remainder of the night I lay staring up at the dark ceiling, wishing I would never fall asleep because I didn't want to stop thinking about the unique sensation that I just felt. It was as if an entirely different personality was waking within me - more bold, more lascvicious, and more alive.

My displays of exhibitionism continued in the days following that night's unscheduled travels. I continued to sport erections in front of Hailey when she least suspected (and always when her mother was out of the house). I would have one as I made her afterschool snacks in the kitchen, helped her with her homework assignments, or role-played with her while she played with her stuffed animal figures. With each passing opportunity, it felt like to me that the girl was lingering longer and longer on my wood before turning away so as not to be "caught" opening staring at it.

Things escalated even more when I began openly taking my cock out of my pants when her back was turned to me, only to sneak it back in just before she turned in my direction. If she were to momentarily walk into her bedroom to put something away, I would be outside masturbating furiously until just before she came back out. And in what was my most perverted act of all that I thought I would never do in a million years, I once ejaculated my semen into a glass of milk that I would serve her alongside a plate of cookies. My heart nearly exploded out of my chest that day over worries she would taste something was different and tell her mother! But to my surprise, my little Hailey downed her milk without missing a beat; and maybe it was just me, but even seemed to enjoy it more than usual!

I sometimes wondered to myself if I unconsciously wanted to get caught and wanted to get sent to prison. After all, what did I have to live for? I was estranged from my parents and only remained at this hellhole of a suburb in Maryland for lack of better employment opportunities elsewhere. So here I was, 24 year old James Matthew Phillips; a man with little schooling beyond high school, few friends, a dead-end job at inconvenient hours, and complacently stuck in a sexless relationship.

I guess I just always had a feeling that my life would be something more. A life full of purpose. I didn't need or want to be a celebrity, athlete, politician, or anything in the spotlight; just to be able to do something that I was passionate about, to work in an industry that was so personally satisfying that it wouldn't even feel like work to me. But what am I truly passionate about? I hardly even know who I am.

In any case, as day came after day, indistinguishable from the last, one came that I thought would never come. It happened as I yet again popped an erection in Hailey's presence; this time while we sat side-by-side on her bed leaning against the headboard, with me reading her one of her favorite children's books. I was holding the book rather low and farther away and so my bulging erection was directly in front of it, covering the lower illustrations on the pages.

I even made the conspicuous move of having each page brush against this bulge as I turned the pages. Eventually I mustered the courage to ask Hailey if she could flip the pages for me, and when it was time she held the page with her right hand, and with her left grabbed my cockhead like a stick shift and tried to bend it toward my navel. There still was too much flesh in the way and with the page difficult to turn, my adorable possible future stepdaughter asked:

"Jim, your weiner's in the way. How do you make it go away?"

"Go away? What do you mean sweetheart?" I asked.

"Sometimes it's sticking out of you and sometimes you put it away somewhere so it doesn't show. Where does it go?"

"Would you really like to know Hailey?"

"Uh huh. Do you have a pocket there, like a kangaroo? My teacher said they're not mammals; they're marsupials."

This was it. The crossroads. I could either make a simple joke of it, bring her back to reading the book, and step away from this ledge of sin before it was too late. Or, not having much else to live for, I could give in to my growing desires and see how far down this rabbit hole goes.

"Well?" the inquisitive 1st grader repeated.

The few seconds it took to answer her could as well have felt like a lifetime.

"Well Hailey, you see ..."