According to a once-popular song, "Jennifer Eccles had terrible freckles and the boys all called her names". Well, boys are usually like that, not seeing past the obvious now and regretting it later. Most adults, on the other hand, thought that at the age of six she was cute and pretty and that the freckles were an asset. Some made a fuss of her, and she played up to their attention. In fact Mrs Eccles had the half-formed thought at the back of her mind that she shouldn't leave Jennifer alone with Uncle Albert, but that's another story....

Jennifer also had acquired an almost pathological obsession with chocolate. Not the good Swiss chocolate that is high in cocoa content, but that rubbishy mass-produced stuff you get at the supermarket. Whether she really and truly and objectively liked chocolate is open to debate, the fact is that the clever marketing and insistent advertising on TV, which truth be told little Jennifer watched too much of, had thoroughly convinced her that Willy Wankers Yummo Bars and such like were indispensible to her happiness.

Of course Mr and Mrs Eccles tried to discourage this, bought very little of the stuff and weren't chocoholics in any way, shape or form. But, humans being what they are, necessity is the mother of invention. Little Jennifer managed, from time to time, to beg chocolates from her friends at Kindy and from adults visiting the Eccles household. She had even begun to resort to stealing from shops, something she managed to get away with because she was small and cute and hadn't yet developed much of a moral sense.

It was now the season of Easter and Mr Eccles, as was his usual practice, had bought for the family four large dark chocolate easter eggs of superb quality. Mrs Eccles had put them in one of the high and rarely used kitchen cupboards, with the idea that the family would consume them as the dessert for their Easter Sunday dinner. Now it so happened that, due to extraordinary circumstances, on Easter Saturday little Jennifer had had to be left alone for a while and the temptation was too great. Far too great.

With great resourcefulness and care she placed one chair on another, opened the cupboard and took out the four easter eggs. After putting the chairs back in their rightful place she took the four superb quality chocolate eggs to her bedroom and in an almost orgiastic frenzy ate every single gram. Then, being an intelligent little girl, she carefully disposed of the packing and wrappers.

Later that day she found that crime did not pay. Retribution came in the form of a terrible tummy ache. Neither Mr nor Mrs Eccles suspected the cause, so she was cared for with real solicitude.

The next day Mrs Eccles prepared a lovely lunch of lamb with potatoes, parsnips, and beetroot, all roasted to perfection in the oven, plus beautifully crisp steamed greens. When every single bit had been eaten (except of course by little Jennifer, who was still suffering from the effects of too much chocolate), Mrs Eccles went to the high cupboard that was rarely used.

Her initial puzzlement and surprise was replaced by suspicion and then certainty when she recalled the bad tummy ache and saw the pale face of her daughter.

"Jennifer!" she said severely, hands on hips, "You ate the easter eggs, didn't you? Don't deny it!"

"Yes Mummy" she finally mumbled.

"You are a selfish and greedy little girl. I'm going to punish you right now!"

"No Mummy, please don't. I'll be good from now on" pleaded the little girl, tears forming in her eyes. She looked to her father for support, but all that he did was to fold his arms and look sternly at her.

"You are going to learn a lesson my girl" said her mother severely. And with that Mrs Eccles, a quite strong woman for her small size, siezed Jennifer and sat back down, dragging the kicking and screaming little girl over her lap. She bundled the pink shift dress up around her waist and pulled the white cotton stretch panties down around her thighs.

"How many smacks should she be given?" she asked, turning to the rest of the family.

"Hmmm" said Mr Eccles, who was of a mathematical turn of mind. "Three of us have been deprived of a treat, and three to the power of three makes 27. Yes, make it 27 smacks, and hard ones too."

"Robert?" Mrs Eccles asked, turning to Jennifer's 10 year old brother.

All that Robert responded with was a blush. This was the very first time that he had seen his sister's bare bottom (let alone her other private parts) and he couldn't take his eyes off it. The blush was on his face because he had a stiffy, also for the first time in public. He was just thankful that he was sitting down and that the table hid it.

"Very well, 27 hard smacks it is" said Mrs Eccles, and proceeded to do just that.

Now that lady, as I said before, was small of stature, but she was also surprisingly strong and had hands that had been hardened by tending the family vegetable plot in the back yard.

Smack! Smack! Smack!

The open-handed blows rained down on Jennifers little bare bottom, mercilessly and continuously.

Smack! Smack! Smack!

Smack! Smack! Smack!

"Please stop Mummy" shrieked the little girl. "It's hurting."

Smack! Smack! Smack!

Smack! Smack! Smack!

By this time she couldn't speak, but was sobbing out loud.

Smack! Smack! Smack!

Smack! Smack! Smack!

She was almost past sobbing, and was certainly past struggling.

Smack! Smack! Smack!

Smack! Smack! Smack!

Mrs Eccles finally stopped and wiped her brow with the back of her hand. Her daughter's bare bottom hard turned an almost uniform bright red, with a few distinct marks across it.

"There now" said Mrs Eccles. She was flushed in the face and felt a bit queer. "Go to your room Jennifer and stay there until your father or I say that you can come out."

Thus it was that the Eccles family missed out on their easter eggs, but one member of the family did get hot crossed buns.