X-treme Convention 
by John O'Connor
Disclaimer:  Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the
property of Stargate (II) Productions,
Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions,
and Gekko Productions. This story is for entertainment
purposes only and no money exchanged hands. No
copyright infringement is intended. The original
characters, situations, and story are the property of
the author.

Part 1

"Hey, Janet, Sam!  Look at the cool waterfall!" Cassie
exclaimed as they descended the escalator from the
airport gates.  The large, indoor waterfall was
between two banks of escalators.
Janet moaned, "Please Cassie.  I have to find a ladies
room..."
"Shouldn't have had that third cup of coffee just
before they flashed the 'Fasten Seat Belts' sign," Sam
giggled.
"Shut up," Janet said weakly.  "Oh God!  Look at the
lines!"
At the base of the escalators was a large area leading
to the Canadian customs desks.  About half were manned
and the lines stretched back almost to the escalators.
"We're going to be here forever!  I'm going to
explode!  I swear to God, I'm gonna explode!"
"Jeez, Janet.  There's gotta be a washroom around
here.  Go find it and we'll get in line."
Janet shook her head, "No, I'll stick it out.  It'd
probably look suspicious if I got out of line anyway."
Sam and Cassie shared evil glances.  "So, Mom, think
they have a pool at the hotel?"
Sam answered, "Of course.  What hotel doesn't have a
pool.  Maybe even a whirlpool.
"You know, I remember one hotel, in Vegas I think,
that had a waterfall going into the pool.  Sounded a
lot like the one behind us," Sam added as she glanced
back at the two-story artificial waterfall.
"Goddamn you guys," Janet growled.  Between the sound
of falling water and the discussion the other two were
having, she was really beginning to suffer.
"You know, all this stuff here is supposed to
represent British Columbia's natural resources.  You
know, like the clear running streams, the cascades,
the rain forests..."
"Sam, I swear, I will kill you personally.  And
slowly..."
Sam and Cass started to laugh, "Sorry Mom.  You have
to admit..."
"Nothing.  I have to admit nothing.  It's not funny."
"Of course not.  Not to you, Jan.  But if it were Jack
O'Neill or Jonas..."
"What about Teal'c?" Cassie added with a big grin.
Janet didn't respond but she continued to do little
dances on the balls of her feet.  She was too focused
on her problem to even get angry at Sam or Cassandra.
But the line she refused to leave seemed to crawl
along.  The young doctor tried to think of things
other than water.  Vast desert scapes like the one she
rode across with Sam and Daniel Jackson in their
attempt to stop Osiris.  Even the brief stint she had
of survival training in California's High Desert
before she joined the SGC.  It seemed to help a
little.
Suddenly, a small release of gas and she felt the
pressure ease on her tortured bladder.  Maybe a bit
more?
"Janet!?!" Sam said quietly.
"What?" Janet responded innocently.
"You farted."
"No I didn't."
"Yes you did.  You just did it again!"
"You can hear that?" Janet asked, her face red and
showing her amazement.
"I have very good hearing," Sam answered.  "So, feel a
little better at least?"  Janet nodded slightly.
"Good.  Cause we're almost there."
In only a few more minutes they went one by one to a
customs window.  Passing over their declaration cards
given on the flight, they all stated their US
citizenship, the purpose of their visit and their
final destination.  Fortunately none of them had any
carry-ons more complicated than a cd walkman and their
cell phones.  (Janet had to practically force Sam to
leave her laptop at home.)
In only a few more minutes, all three were through
customs and waiting at one of the baggage carousels
for their luggage.  Sam looked at Janet, "You can go
ahead.  We'll catch up.  Just give me your claim tags.
  Got your phone?"
Gratefully, Janet nodded and passed the tickets on to
Sam then raced off to find the nearest women's room
near the central terminal.
In a short time, Sam found Janet waiting by the exit
into the main terminal looking more relieved than she
had in quite some time.  "Feel better?"
Janet glared at her but nodded.  She was too relieved
to feel angry at the earlier teasing.  She'd just have
to get them both back at some point.
Cassie came up, tugging a luggage cart, "Everything
come out alright?"
Janet shook her head and said, "She is never staying
with Jack O'Neill again!"
On the way out of the terminal, Sam stopped at a
currency exchange to turn in their American money.
Passing the clerk $1000.00, he gave back $1500.00
Canadian.
With a big smile, Sam caught up to her friends.  "Wow,
that guy on the plane..."
"The one hitting on you?" Cassie asked with a giggle.
"Yeah, that one.  I think he was right.  Got one and
half times on the exchange."
As Sam showed them the multi-colored money, Cassie
said, "Hey, looks like Monopoly money or something."
"Ssh.  Remember, you're supposed to be from here,"
Janet whispered.
"I know.  Toronto.  But the money still looks funny."
"I think it's kinda cool," Sam interjected.
They waited at the hotel shuttle stop outside the
terminal and soon a small bus pulled up.  "Best
Western Richmond Inn" was written on it and displayed
above the windshield.  "That's us," Sam said as she
pulled the cart over.
In minutes they were out of the airport and headed
towards Richmond.  Sam stared when she saw a gas
station just outside the airport.  "Gas is only 80
cents?"
Janet nodded, "Yeah.  And with the exchange rate..."
The driver spoke up, "Yeah, the prices keep going up.
Last spring a liter was around seventy-four cents."
"Oh!  That's per liter!" Sam nodded.  "Now, that makes
sense." Then she shook her head, "Forgot about the
metric system."
As they approached a multi-lane bridge, Cassie asked,
"What are we crossing?"
"That's the North Arm of the Fraser River," the driver
said.
"Hey!  Fraiser!  We have family up here?" Cassie
asked, momentarily forgetting she was supposed to be
from Canada.  She pointed to large rafts of timber
loosely held together near the banks.  "I saw a lot of
those in the air."
"Spelled differently, Cass," Sam said.  "The river."
"Oh, like the show on NBC?"
Sam shook her head as the driver said, "No, like the
explorer, Simon Fraser.  F-R-A-S-E-R. Richmond is on
an island between two arms of the river.  Most of the
commerce is along the North Arm.
"Those rafts of logs you see are from up in the high
country.  Timber is a big part of the local economy.
That and fishing are still big here."
Within a few blocks of the bridge was the hotel.  The
driver helped Sam with the bags while Cassie
volunteered to get a cart from the lobby.  Janet went
ahead to get their room keys.
As Sam and Cassie waited for Janet to finish, they saw
the sign-up table across the lobby from the main desk.
  No one was there yet but, after all, they were a day
early.
"That's where we need to sign up when everything
starts," Cassie said.
"Yep.  Looks like."
"I'm excited.  Are you excited?"
"You betcha," Sam fibbed.  In reality, she couldn't
care less about the con or the show that spawned it.
But she was excited about spending a long weekend with
her extended family away from the SGC.
Janet walked up and handed them each a white plastic
card the size of a credit card.  They were blank
except for a black strip running lengthwise on one
side.  "Here.  Each of us has a key.  We're in the
south tower on the 2nd floor.  Room 213."
"Let's go," Cassie said, tugging at the hotel luggage
cart.
As they waited for the elevator, Sam said to Janet, "I
don't know about you but I wouldn't mind a drink or
two."
"Back the other way is a bar called the Thirsty
Turtle.  We can get food there too."
"Sounds good to me," Sam said with a smile.
Opening the door, they were greeted with only two
beds.  Janet had expected as much from her years of
traveling with the CDC.  "So, Sam, you pick your bed
and Cass and I will take the other."
"Aaww, Mo-om!"
Sam smiled.  She remembered what it was like to be
sixteen even if her friend had seemingly forgotten.
She especially remembered how embarrassed she often
felt going on vacation with her father when she
considered herself old enough to stay home alone.
"Janet," Sam said, leading the doctor onto the small
balcony overlooking one of the parking lots.  Once
they were out of earshot she suggested, "We can double
up.  I don't mind and then Cassie can have her own
bed.  How 'bout it?"
"You snore."
"That was in Cairo.  It was dry and all the dust from
the tomb..."
"Alright.  But if you start, you're sleeping on the
floor."
"Yes Ma'am."  Walking back in, Sam announced, "Cass,
you can have this bed.  Your mom and I will sleep on
the one closer to the window."
"Why that one?"
"Because there's more room on both sides of the bed if
one of us needs to get up.  Your bed is practically up
against the wall."
Meanwhile, Janet was still on the balcony looking at
the hotel tower across the lot.  Something was
different but she couldn't put her finger on it.  Then
she realized that along with the Marriott chain's flag
and the U.S. flag, they were flying the Canadian Maple
Leaf flag.
'Of course they are.  What else would they be flying?
The state flag of Colorado?' she chided herself.
Looking down at the entrance of their hotel, she saw
the same thing with a Best Western banner replacing
the Marriott.
Later, after they had unpacked and settled in, Sam
said, "Well, what should we do?  No con events today,
even registration isn't until tomorrow afternoon."
"We could rent a car and see Vancouver," Janet
suggested, stifling a yawn.
"I gotta send out postcards," Cassie announced.
"And I'm hungry," Sam added.
"Let's just get a late lunch and go from there."
Janet yawned again.  Unless she was on the verge of
collapse, she could not sleep on a plane.  And she'd
been up a couple of hours before Sam or Cassandra,
antsy to go on a real vacation before the SGC called.
"Okay, before we go anywhere, everyone have their
cell?" Sam asked.  The other two nodded.  They had
decided to bring their phones so they could get in
touch without trying to track each other down.
"Remember," Sam said, holding her phone up.  "Not to
be used frivolously."  She looked directly at
Cassandra who gave her a 'Who? Me?' look.
Soon they were in the Thirsty Turtle, a small bar and
grill at the end of one of the wings of the hotel.
There was a pool table and some big-screen TVs
scattered about showing hockey highlights.  It wasn't
too busy and they ordered fairly quickly.
Sam sipped her beer, a Molson Canadian, and sighed.
"This is the stuff!" she declared.
Janet had an iced tea and Cassie had a diet Coke while
they waited for their food.  Janet eyed the beer and
said, "I think Canadian beer a bit more potent than
our stuff."
"Don't worry, I'm not gonna get hammered.  I promised
Short Stuff I'd take her to the mall after lunch so
you can get your naptime in."
Janet moaned, "Yeah, if this is anything like the Star
Trek con my roommate and I went to during Med School,
we won't get much sleep."
A man at a nearby table looked over, "You here for the
con?"
"Yes, we are."
"So am I.  Brought my nieces.  They love the show.
I'm Jim Barrents.  This is Ashley and Allison."
"I'm Janet Fraiser, this is my daughter Cassandra and
our friend Samantha Carter."
"I usually go by Sam."
"I go by Cassie."
"I go by Allie."
"I'm just Ashley," the remaining teen said with a
grin.
The two tables talked as they awaited their food.  Jim
and his nieces were from Green Bay, Wisconsin.  He
brought them as a 16th birthday present.  "Before they
get too embarrassed to be seen with an adult
relative," he added.
"I know what you mean," Janet agreed, rolling her eyes
at Cassie.
"Hey!"
Janet looked at their new acquaintance, "So, you like
'Wormhole X-treme'?"
Jim shrugged, "If there's nothing else on.  It's not
as good as some of the other stuff out there.  Pretty
campy.  And the lead is like some Shatner wannabe.
But the doctor is hot!"
"Uncle Ji-im!"  Everyone chuckled at Ashley's
outburst.
"I have only seen maybe two episodes.  Are you talking
about the one who looks like Annabeth Gish on 'The
X-Files'?"
"No, that's Major Monroe.  The doctor's a redhead but
she's not in every episode.  But she's supposed to be
here.  You know, the manager here looks kinda like
her," Jim said, nodding to an attractive woman at the
bar going over paperwork.
(Unknown to any of them at the tables, the manager
would be asked several times over the coming weekend
if she was the doctor on the show.)
Allie chimed in, "She does.  Wow.  Maybe they're
related?"
"Who plays the doctor?" Sam asked.
"Her name is Michelle Charters.  She's been on some of
the other shows shot up here like 'X-Files' and 'Outer
Limits.'"
"So has Yolanda Reese," Allie added.  "She's my
favorite on the show."
"Mine too," Cassie agreed.
"What about you Sam?  You watch the show?" Jim asked.
"Not really.  I...uh, I kinda know one of the
creators.  And my C.O. was the Air Force liaison for a
couple of weeks."
"C.O.?"
"Oh, yeah, Janet and I are both Air Force.  Both
majors.  I'm in astrophysics and she's a medical
doctor.  The best anywhere."
"Sa-am!" Janet cried, secretly pleased at Sam's
praise.
"NASA?"
"No, actually we're both in Colorado Springs at NORAD.
  She also has a position at the Academy Hospital."
"So you two are up here for her?" Jim nodded at the
teenager.
"Yup.  Sort of a late birthday present for Cass.  Her
sixteenth too.  She had a kinda rotten birthday so her
mom and I decided to make it up to her this way."  Sam
was proud of how well she understated the near-tragic
events of several months ago.
"Like I said, it's kinda nice to do something with
them before they get too old to be seen with us," Jim
said. "An old friend of mine is coming up with her
daughter tomorrow, too."
"She your girlfriend?"
"Cassie, that's kind of personal!"
"No, that's okay Janet.  We're just very good friends.
  Been best buddies since high school actually.  I'm
just a single guy trying to raise two hellions."
"So's Janet.  Except it's only one hellion," Sam
laughed, drawing scowls from her two friends.
Both tables were served almost simultaneously and the
two groups turned back to their respective tables.
After each table paid their tab and got ready to
leave, Sam offered to take all three girls to the
mall.  Jim happily agreed.
"I can use a break," he joked.
Agreeing to meet in the lobby in twenty minutes, Sam
and Janet took their hellion back to the room.
While Cass brushed her teeth, Sam said, "He's kinda
cute.  And single."
"Samantha Carter!  I do not need you to fix me up!
And I'm not interested!"  Janet paused and added, "I
mean, he's a nice guy and all but...  Anyway, even if
I was interested, he's a thousand miles away."
"Okay!  Okay!"
"What about you?" Janet asked.
"Nah, not my type."
"And just what is your type?"
Cassie came out of the bathroom at that moment,
sparing Sam the need to answer.
In truth, she had no idea what her type was.
* * * * * *
The trip to the Richmond Centre Mall was fun.  It was
only a couple of blocks away and so the four Americans
walked over.  After setting a time to meet back in the
food court, Sam was quickly deserted as the three new
friends scurried off to the nearest fashion boutiques.
"Come all the way to Canada to go shopping," Sam
muttered good-naturedly.  "Now, where can I find Cuban
cigars..."
There turned out to be a couple of places she could go
and so she did some price shopping.  Cubans weren't
cheap but she did promise Jack.  And she thought the
general would appreciate one or two himself.
Wondering if Jonas liked cigars, Sam bought several
from a news vendor kiosk at the north end of the mall.
Deciding Jonas probably wouldn't care for cigars, she
opted to get him a couple of pins, one with the
Canadian and American flags and one with the Canadian
and British Columbian flags.  She'd already decided to
get Teal'c a Native American hand-carved fish in honor
of him going along with the colonel on several fishing
expeditions.
Relaxing in the food court with a soda and the local
Vancouver paper, Sam quietly waited on her young
charges.
* * * * * *
"Sam!  How could you let her buy clothes?  She has
more than enough at home.  And most of those she
brought with her," Janet lamented.
"Sorry.  I just..."
"Mom, it's my fault.  I saw the blouse and I had to
have it.  I've never seen anything like this in
Colorado Springs.  Look," Cassie pleaded as she held
the blouse up.
"You just never noticed it before, young lady.
Clothes in Canada aren't any different than Colorado.
Except for the French writing on the tags.  Did you at
least get those postcards?"
Cassie slapped her forehead, pained expression on her
face.
Trying to change the subject, Sam asked, "How was your
nap?"
"Fine.  I'm not nearly as tired as I was.  But I'm
starving.  That salad did not fill me up..."
"Let's go to Fisherman's Wharf.  Supposed to be some
good restaurants down there."
"Walking distance?"  Sam shook her head. "Cab?"
Sam nodded and added, "Or we could rent a car..."
They opted for the rental.  This way, they weren't
'trapped' at the hotel or at the mercy of the local
rapid transit system.
They dined at one of the seafood establishments along
the historic wharf and wandered up and down the old
district.  Before long, only Janet, who had napped
earlier, had any energy left.
Driving back to the hotel, a ten minute trip, was too
long for Sam and Cassandra.  They were both nodding in
the car as Janet drove through Richmond.  The
sympathetic side of her won out and she opted to be
gentle waking them at the Richmond.
After getting them to the room, Janet didn't exactly
feel like calling it a night.  It was only 9:30 after
all.  She earlier noticed the Foggy Dew, an Irish pub
nearby, and walked over there.  After ordering a pint,
she circulated through the small, midweek crowd.
"Hey!" a familiar voice said from behind her.  Turning
she saw Jim Barrents.  "Care to join me?"
With a smile, Janet sat on the barstool next to him.
"Hi.  Thanks.  Nice to see someone I recognize."
"Yeah.  So you flyin' solo tonight?"
"Yup.  I took a nap earlier and now, while Sam and
Cassie are snoring, I'm out and about.  You?"
"Left the girls to the hotel cable.  They want to try
on the outfits they bought today.  I need to remember
to thank Sam for taking them."
"She had fun too."
"Good.  You know, I do spoil them but, since their
mother and father passed away..."
"Oh, I'm sorry," Janet said.  "And I'm sure you aren't
spoiling them."
"Thanks.  They're good kids and I am slowly learning
not to give in.  But they do have me wrapped around
their collective little finger.
"Kinda knew it would be that way if I ever had a
daughter anyway, so I'm not surprised."
"I did the same with Cass when she first came into my
life.  Her family is...gone too.  I took her in and
then officially adopted her a couple of years ago."
"Must be rough with no one else to help out," Jim
observed.
"Oh, Sam's there a lot.  She's a godsend.  And
Cassandra adores her."
"Hey, I was thinking, when Krista gets up here with
Mina, the girls are getting their own room.  If it's
okay with you, I'm sure the girls would love to have
Cassie with them."
"Thanks.  I...I don't know though..."
"Yeah, I understand.  You don't know me or anything.
If you change your mind, the offer's open.
"And it'd give you and Sam some time together alone,"
Jim added.
"Sam and I?"  Janet was confused for a moment then her
eyes widened, "Oh!  Oh no, it's not like that.  We're
just friends.  Really."
Jim nodded, his eyes locked on the pint in his hands,
"Sorry.  I know how the military is so..."
"No, really.  We are just friends."
"Oh!  Now I really feel like an idiot.  I just
thought... Well, from the way the two of you act
together.  You're very close.  I guess I just...
Sorry."
"No.  That's okay."  To show there were no hard
feelings, Janet signaled the bartender for another
round.
* * * * * *
Entering the room, she saw they had left the bathroom
light on for her.  Glancing at the beds, she saw her
friend and her daughter both sleeping quietly.
Janet went into the bathroom and changed into her
sleepwear: an old concert t-shirt and boxer shorts.
Then, after brushing her teeth and taking care of
other business, she turned out the light and stumbled
out of the suddenly darkened room.
Climbing under the covers next to Sam, she glanced at
the blonde.  Sam opened one eye to slit, still more
asleep than awake.
"Night Sam," Janet said softly with a smile.
"G'night, sw'tie," Sam muttered already falling back
into a deep sleep.
Even with the three beers she had, Janet lay
sleeplessly next to her friend, reflecting on how nice
it felt to be sharing a bed again.  If only...
Eventually she succumbed to sleep herself.
And soon, the only sound in the room was the soft
snoring coming from the person with sinus problems.
 (c) John O'Conner
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