NOTE: My ASSTR stories revolve around pedophilia. If you don't like this sort of thing, don't click the aforementioned link and stop reading now.
Here's an exit.
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January 1, 2012
Thank you! You know who you are. |
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December 24, 2011
A warm season's greetings to all. Again, apologies for the long hiatus. I'm sure everyone has figured out by now, but The Cheerleaders was indeed an April Fool's joke. I'm sorry if you found it cruel, but I thought it was funny. Naturally, many people thought it was a "real" story and asked me to continue. I promise I won't screw with you like this again. My last blog post was written in a optimistic burst when I was feeling especially creative. Naturally, all creative impulses disappeared the second I posted that blog and I felt no desire to write whatsoever. My New Year's Resolution will be to underpromise and over-deliver from now on. All the stories I listed are in various states of (in)completion. I really can't say when they will be finished. That being said, I am happy to give you at least one story: Sibling Rivalry. My apologies for being such an unreliable author. It seems there is a 400-strong faithful fans who still check once a day for any updates. I appreciate your appreciation. Thanks also to everyone who replied for my piteous call for attention and let me know how much they enjoy my stories. This is always nice to hear. I hope you all had a wonderful 2011. Let's all raise our glasses to an even better 2012. Janus |
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March 6, 2011
Hi everyone, Yes, it has been a while since I posted my last story. Writing is hard and I only write when I feel like it. As usual, I have a lot of stories started but none are finished. After a two year hiatus, I started posting stories again last June. There were seven stories, to be exact, and to be completely honest, the response to these stories was rather lukewarm. I'm not fishing for compliments here but if I don't hear from people, I'll assume they didn't really care for the story. Which is fine. I write to please myself, first and foremost, and I don't expect everyone to latch on to my whimsy. That being said, however, if I get the impression that people don't enjoy the stories, then that makes me less inspired to write. I just realized that I'm making excuses for not writing more and finishing stories. Well, there you have it. Here is a laundry list of what I'm working on at the moment. These are all in varying degrees of completion, ranging from rough outlines to partially completed chapters. Be forewarned that listing them here does not guarantee completion. The Agency: A 'day in the life' style story about a child pornography studio. Cecilia: An overachieving know-it-all meets her match when her uncle challenges her to master a new game with him. Club Metamorphosis: A group of fathers create their own Freemasonry style club. The esoteric group meets monthly and their daughters always accompany them. Eden Outsiders: A shipwrecked family accidentally stumbles across Eden Island. Eden Princess: On a distant part of Eden Island, there is a maximum security prison where men actually pay to incarcerate themselves for life. In exchange, they receive access to what they've always dreamed about: young girls. Eden Reluctance: Not all the children of Eden Island are eager participants in the daily sexual activity. The Magic Playhouse: A young girl discovers that a magical fairy lives in the her backyard playhouse constructed by her father. I stole this idea from another story. I liked the premise but didn't like how the writer handled it so this will be my version. The Monkey: A young girl vacillates between a comfortable life with her wealthy stepfather and mother and a spartan life with her impoverished father. This story was inspired after reading Harry Harlow's surrogate mother experiment with monkeys. Numbers: After abandoning the family, a father returns and his daughter finds herself flooded with hidden memories that strand her on an island of ambivalence. Sibling Rivalry: Harriet is filled with confusing feelings when she discovers her father has also been conducting secret games with her older sister. Undercover: A Middle Eastern prince runs an underage harem that gets targeted by law enforcement. This story is a changeup for me because it involves adult male domination, which I have to admit is kind of fun to write. It might also feature Mb action. Is anyone out there interested in Mb action? Anyone? So for anyone who was interested, this is what I'm working on. If there are any of these that you really would like to see finished, let me know and, depending on the response, I will prioritize. And if you liked any of my already published stories, drop me a line because it's always nice to know your work is appreciated. Janus |
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June 10, 2010
Hi everyone, I'm sorry it's been so long since the last update. Isn't this how I started the last entry? Thanks to everyone who has written to me with their praise and encouragement. I do get your emails and I do read them all. I was amazed at the outpouring of kindness at my last blog entry when I mentioned my stolen computer. One person even offered to send me his old computer. Super nice, but I didn't take him up on it. If I didn't respond to your email, I apologize. My access to computers (for personal use) has been iffy for the past few years. I have posted one new story: Scripted Surrender. I hope you like it. I'd like to write more but I just don't have the same amount of free time and free imagination that I used to have. Things change... life happens... stuff like that. I do have a few more stories that are nearing completion. Depending on how Scripted Surrender goes over with people, I'll see if I can finish the other stories. Honestly, it's been so long that I'm not even sure I have a fan base anymore. So if you're out there, say hello. Janus |
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February 24, 2008
Hi everyone, I'm sorry it's been so long since the last update. Long story short: my house was robbed last summer and my computer was stolen. I haven't been able to get a new computer due to occassional funds (another long story) so all this equals no updates. Have you ever tried to write out a story in longhand using a pen and paper? If you don't get carpal tunnel after a few pages, then you'll find it takes a really, really, really, really long time. I am now in a situation where I have occassional access to a computer though it is not my own. This complicates matters greatly since it isn't secure and I can't save my files to it. I was able to get three stories online but you shouldn't expect anything more soon. I'll do my best though. I'd like to thank everyone who has written to me over the past year. I do get these emails and I read them all but it's just not feasible to respond. I hope everyone is well. Janus P.S. Here are links to the new stories if you haven't found them on the main page: Mistaken Identity The Camping Trip Arin Before Bed |
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March 30, 2007
A new story, Jane's Misfortune was added today. If you've been waiting for updates, I apologize and thank you for your patience. In any case, it was inspired by a rash that recently afflicted me. I used some ointment but I walked around all day thinking, "Hmmm, it feels like someone could do me up the ass anytime/anywhere since it's so slippery back there." I've been writing down more memories to be added to the "Scenes from a Childhood" post below. I don't know why but I've got this urge to write it all down. Do any of you actually care to read this? Let me know. I changed what I'm currently writing from an impersonal storytelling to straight-out first person narrative as well. The followup to Eden Island is coming along nicely. I've also started a story about two sisters, Rachel and Rebecca. Heaven knows if I will actually finish it. This is very typical for me. I'm also toying with the idea of a suite stories that involves marigolds, batteries, and ice cream. Wish me luck! From the February 11, 2006 entry (seems so long ago!), I listed a bunch of stories I'm working on. Of that list: Bus Stop: Started but never finished. 4047 words currently written The Experiment: Never got past the brainstorming stage. The Model: Never got past the brainstorming stage. Trials of Nellie: Started but never finished. 3467 words currently written. Rest Stop: I actually have a Chapter 9 draft of 1522 words written. The story itself is somewhat sketchy meaning it might not get finished. For me to write, the story idea has to really grab me. I hope everyone is doing well. |
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February 16, 2007
Scenes from a Childhood I've been finding it hard to write new stories. They say, "Write what you know." This is how I remember it. Even though it is undoubtedly distorted by the lens of time, I've tried to keep it pure as possible. The First Time Annie was six years old. There was a birthday celebration happening, though it wasn't her own. Frank asked her if he could see her room. Seeing no harm in it, she led the man upstairs. She liked Frank. Annie had known him for as long as she could remember. He could always make her laugh by making his funny faces and she liked watching TV with him because he would brush her hair. She loved having her hair touched. It made her feel safe and warm. Once inside her room, Annie began showing Frank her newest toys, explaining each one in painstaking detail in the way only a six-year old could. Frank laughed. His face scrunched in terror when she showed him her new dragon stuffed animal. Then he cooed when she pulled out a teddy bear. "Want to listen to some music, Annie?" he asked. Annie nodded yes and began jumping up and down on the bed, her dress flapping along with her. Frank plugged in the little record player box and thumbed through the stack of LPs. After carefully moving the arm down onto the spinning vinyl, he went to close the door. Annie was still jumping on the bed. Her face was red with exertion and merriment now. The little girl liked spinning in a circle when she wore a dress because her hemline would spin out like a fluttering flag. She didn't notice that spinning like that easily revealed her white underwear. Frank probably noticed though. He took the little girl in his arms and they began to dance to the music. Annie giggled. She stood on the bed to match his height so they were limited to the rectangle of the mattress. Together they swooped and swirled around the bed. Finally, Frank tossed her onto the bedspread and began tickling her. "Eek!" Annie screeched, trying to avoid his hands. She laughed and rolled about for several moments until Frank finally stopped. Panting, her hair matted to her bright red cheeks, Annie sat up and clutched herself cautiously, lest Frank begin tickling her again. He didn't. Instead he sat down on the floor and regarded her for a long minute. He shifted himself into a cross-legged sitting position. Annie did the same on the bed. "Hey Annie," he said. "Want to play a new game?" "What kind of game?" "It's called Explorer." "How do you play?" "Here's a man," Frank said, his two fingers imitated a walking motion across the bedspread. "He's going to explore the world." Annie watched as the man walked across the bedspread and crept underneath a pillow. "Hmm, what's down here?" Frank said in a pretend voice, all pinched and nasally. Annie giggled. "Nothing, I guess. Let's keep exploring, shall we?" The two walking fingers emerged from under the pillow. "Look at the size of this cliff?" Frank said, walking along the edge of the bed. "It must be a thousand feet deep!" "Don't fall off!" Annie warned, playing along. "Good idea," Frank agreed. "Let's see... What's this big mountain over here?" His fingers began walking up Annie's bare leg. She laughed because his touch tickled her. "Whoa, careful!" Frank said, his two fingers hopping off her leg. "Did you feel that tremor? This must be earthquake country!" Annie covered her hand with her mouth and laughed. "Do you suppose it's safe to explore here?" Frank asked her. Annie nodded. "Okay then, let's try again..." His fingers reached the hem of her white dress. "Looks pretty snowy around here, men. Nothing but white countryside as far as the eye can see." "Can they make snowmen?" Annie asked. "Maybe," replied Frank. "But I think they had better find some shelter first. It's getting dark outside." His fingers crawled up her leg to her waist. "Uh oh, men. Looks like this is a mile-high mountain. We can't climb that tonight better turn around." His fingers walked back down her leg. "Hold up! What's this?" His fingers poked underneath her hemline. "I think we found ourselves a cave where we can rest tonight, gentleman." Annie tried not to laugh as his finger walked up her legs. She couldn't stop from squealing though when he tickled the underside of her knee. "I guess we can't camp there, can we?" he chuckled. Then his fingers continued on. They danced across her inner thighs before finally reaching the white cotton underwear at the juncture of her legs. Annie sat very still as he rubbed her through her underwear. No one had ever touched her there before and she knew it was taboo. "Um, Frank?" she began hesitantly. "What is it, Annie?" he asked in his normal voice. "We're just playing a game. That's okay, right?" "Oh." A game. Games never hurt anyone, Annie reasoned. "Okay." He touched her some more. Then he changed to his funny pinched voice again. "Oh my goodness!" he proclaimed. "Men! I think we've found it. I think there's a girl underneath here!" Frank made funny faces and swooned in mock ecstasy. Annie couldn't help from laughing. He pawed some more between her legs. "There's a white layer of snow protecting the girl," Frank announced. "We must dig in the snow to explore!" Annie stared into the white material of her dress that hid Frank's hand. She felt him pull aside the leg-band of her underwear and slip his fingers underneath. "It feels nice and warm in here," Frank said in his nasally voice. "But we better take a look around to make sure it's safe to camp here." Annie didn't know what to think. She knew it was a game. Games were supposed to be fun but she wasn't sure how she felt about this. It made her feel oddly embarrassed to have Frank touching her down there. But he was an adult, wasn't he? He was an adult and she trusted him. Annie didn't say anything. Instead, she didn't move and continued sitting cross-legged as Frank touched her. The room was silent for a long time. Finally, Frank looked up at her and Annie shyly met his eyes. He must have sensed her discomfort because he withdrew his hand. "Never mind, troops," he said briskly. "We'll have to find a better place to camp. But we'll mark that spot on the map to explore again, won't we?" Frank smiled at Annie and tickled her knees. She laughed and in a moment it seemed like that strange moment never happened. "I guess we should go back downstairs, huh?" Frank asked, standing up. He held Annie's hand as she stood up on the bed as well. "They're probably getting ready to cut the cake." He twirled her around and Annie responded spinning fast so her dress flung out in a wide circle around her waist. "Whoa!" Frank said, catching her as Annie collapsed in a dizzy heap, laughing madly. "Say, Annie," he said, stroking her hair. "Explorer is a fun game, isn't it? Let's not tell anyone about it, okay? It will be our special, secret game." "Okay," Annie agreed. She was good at keeping secrets. "Let's go get some cake, okay, Princess?" Annie nimbly jumped off the bed and followed Frank downstairs. He was right. They were starting to open presents and plates of cake were being handed out. |
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August 6, 2006
Note to all the guys who want me to write about vaginal penetration: don't hold your breath. |
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July 30, 2006
A reader wrote to me with the following question: “Do you mind if men do things like you say in stories?” Yes, I do mind. A lot. These stories are strictly fantasies and they should be kept as such. Some might say I’m being a hypocrite. I’m not. There’s a big difference between thinking and doing. If I haven’t been clear: THERE IS NO EXCUSE FOR MOLESTING CHILDREN. IT IS WRONG. I DO NOT WANT MY STORIES TO HAPPEN IN REAL LIFE. Running this website is a constant source of inner turmoil for me. You have no idea how often I come close to pulling the plug on this site and deleting everything. Seriously. I wish I didn’t have these stories in my head. I wish I were normal like other people. But I’m not and I have to accept it. Just because I write these stories DOES NOT mean I condone this behavior. This is fantasy people. Keep it in your head. Keep it in your pants. End sermon. |
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July 18, 2006
I'm revamping the site. Old txt file stories are being converted to html format. |
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July 17, 2006
People keep emailing me to report that Raised By Wolves is a dead link. I've checked several times and this doesn't seem to be true. What gives? Maybe people are getting to the faux-news magazine part of it and think it's a wrong link? |
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July 15, 2006
As usual, I’m sorry for the lack of updates. I have a full-time job and other commitments so finding the time to write is not an easy thing to do. Your comments and encouragement are always good motivators though. Readers keep asking me personal questions. While I'm reluctant to reveal all, here are some answers. ABOUT ME I’ve hemmed and hawed, sometimes lying outright to my readers who have emailed me (Look Millay, I'm sorry, okay?). For the record: I’m female. No disclosures about age other than I’m older than 30. I grew up with two older brothers and was a complete tomboy growing up. I was close to my brothers. No, nothing inappropriate ever happened with my siblings and me. I went to a Catholic school. I had a “history” (as they say in therapy-land) with one of the priests there though it was not unpleasant. My first history involved a friend of the family, starting when I was six years old and this was NOT pleasant. It continued until I was ten and I didn’t tell anyone about it until I was seventeen. Looking at my past, I’m a little screwed up. I’ve been in and out of therapy with varying degrees of usefulness. By the time I was a teenager, I had fallen in with the wrong crowd and things were starting to spiral badly out of control. I pulled myself together in my twenties. These days, the most telling evidence of my past are a tendency towards manic depression and this website obviously. I feel proud that I'm a survivor but I still wish things had been different. MY STORIES "Where do you get story ideas from?" is a common question. They're all fictional but liberally interspersed with my own experiences. The stories are certainly NOT autobiographies but there are snippets here and there from my past. When I was in my late teens, one therapist told me to imagine things from my perpetrator's point of view. The purpose of the exercise was to absolve me of guilt and blame, to persuade my mind that it my molestor's fault and not mine. Years later, in my twenties, I tried this trick again. I imagined events of my childhood from the perpetrator's point of view. This time, it was different though. I found that it was a turn-on for me to visualize through the eyes of my molester. Needless to say, this realization sent me back to therapy. Therapists always recommend keeping a personal diary so I did. I wrote in it often but over time it had morphed into a fantasy journal. More and more, my fantasies started to feature younger girls involved with older men. I eventually came to terms with the fact that my dysfunctional upbringing was now the source of sexual fantasies. My fantasy journal became a lot bolder and I started writing fictional stories. I used my own experiences as the initial fodder, embellishing with my own imagination as needed. In 2003, I decided to start posting on ASSTR. I was surprised at the amount of positive feedback. I half-expected people to throw stones. Most emails were nice and polite but some were from clearly creepy people. When anyone asked though, I decided to say I was a guy to stave off weirdos. (Aside: Guys, you really have no idea how easy you have it in this world.) These days I feel comfortable enough on ASSTR to withstand any creeps who will bombard my inbox because they know I'm female. So that's my story. I deeply apologize if I misled anyone over the past three years. |
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May 14, 2006
Gentle Readers, Last week I made a post indicating that I wouldn't have time to write until June. Well, Gentle Readers, today is going to be your birthday, Christmas (or spiritual equivalent), and "last day of school hurrah" all rolled up into one. I just posted Chapter 8 of The Rest Stop, which has always been a popular story. The Beatles had "Yesterday", J.D. Salinger had "The Catcher in the Rye", Van Gogh had "Starry Night", and Janus has "The Rest Stop". I have one more chapter lined up after this one but I don't know where it goes afterwards. I'm willing to write more as long as I've got character development to explore. Otherwise, it just turns into a series of descriptives that don't add up to anything. We'll see what happens to the fictional Amanda, I guess. Feel free to drop me a line with comments about the new chapter or ideas for future installments. |
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March 19, 2006
Hi all, sorry for the long hiatus. The writing muse has been silent lately. I just added chapter two of Exhibitionist Tricks. The story goes from a low-brow beginning to a rather high-brow ending. It really surprised me. This was one of those stories that came out of nowhere. It was like it was already written and I was merely transcribing it. Anyway, please use the feedback form and tell me what you think. |
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February 17, 2006
Ah, Rest Stop. What is about Rest Stop that makes it so alluring? I receive more emails about Rest Stop than any other story. I'm not sure it's because it ends abruptly. A common theme to all my stories is that any of them could have a sequel. They're all open-ended. The only real differentiating aspect of Rest Stop is that it is a dark story written in the 3rd person that details molestation. Vanessa's Story, The Compassion of Tara-Ann, and Mary Ann's Swimming Lessons all explore similar themes but these are written as 1st person. Perhaps that made them too dark? In any case, I aim to please so I will do my best to chisel out another chapter of Rest Stop. Thanks to all who have written me with constructive criticism concerning the story. Oh and what the freak happened on February 16 when my main page had almost 1800 hits in one day? I usually top out around 800. Perhaps it was some sort of post-Valentine's Day hysteria. |
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February 11, 2006
I finally ditched the crappy Ultimate Counter in favor of a new counter sponsored my Mr. Double. If you've never checked out Mr Double's site, you should give it a shot. Lots of authors and stories but it is a pay site. I only wish the new counter could pick up where the old one left off. Oh well. I had about 500,000 hits when I switched over to the new counter a few days ago. That's 500,000 hits between July 2003 and February 2006. I rarely receive emails which leads me to believe these hits are either from A) lurkers or B) people who didn't care for the stories. If you're wondering what I'm working on, here's my list of brainstormed ideas: The Amusement Park: I'm trying to write an nc story about a girl who gets molested at a Disneyworld type amusement park. The idea is that the perpetrator has a special choker that prevents the wearer from screaming. I thought I would also steal the tagline from Alien: "At Disneyworld, No One Can Hear You Scream." NOTE: This story was completed . The Bus Stop: A little girl is the first one picked up by her bus driver each day. There will be some action between the two of them but I haven't figured out if this should be a consensual story or non-consensual story. Should it she be inviting the bus driver or should she be molested against her will each day she rides the bus? Eden Island 2: Very few people commented on the original Eden Island story so maybe I shouldn't bother with this one. Now that the setting of Eden Island has been created, I thought it would be interesting if an outsider happens to visit the island. The outsider being a young girl, of course. The consent vs non-consent issue is also up in the air for this one. The Experiment: This would be something along the lines of The Watson Clinic. A group of researchers are running experiments to determine arousal levels in pre-teen girls. They have the girls hooked up to equipment to measure arousal and then subject them to different stimuli. The Model: I've had this story on the back burner a long time. This usually means it won't be written. The story would revolve around a young Ukranian girl forced to model to support her family. She starts out doing innocent modelling work but the explicitness progresses to nude modelling and then finally to hardcore action. This story is meant to focus on the girl's pyschology rather than the events which makes it difficult to write. I've got an outline down but no actual writing yet. The Pediatrician 2: The second part of The Pediatrician 1. The doctor uses some vibrating medical instruments on a patient as well as administers more of his special medicine. This sounds like a re-hash and no one wrote me about the first part so I might ditch this story. New Tricks: An exhibitionist in the park disguises his penis so he can expose himself to unwitting young girls. The first chapter is actually written although I need to brush it up a bit. NOTE: This story was completed . The Trials of Nellie: An eight-year old girl is forced into embarrassing situations by her father. She has to wear underwear with a built in vibrator and has reluctant orgasms in public. She also has to wear a skirt in the mall with no underwear while clenching a weighted dildo in her pussy. This story has a very detailed outline but I can't quite seem to nail it down. A few chapters are written but the storyline is taking a lot of work. I prefer stories that write themselves and this one isn't doing it. Raised by Wolves: Along the lines of Feeding Caitlin, this story is about a infant raised by a group of male explorers in the Canadian wilderness following a plane crash. The explorers don't have any infant formula so they have to find other ways to nourish the baby girl. This goes on for several years before they are rescued. Returned to civilization, the young girl has now developed a taste for semen and has no taboo about procuring her "snacks". NOTE: This story was completed . These are my primary works in progress. Really vague story ideas are: A female babysitter who slips her male charge some Viagra A male music teacher in Greece who teaches a young violinist about her body Using rubber bands as a cock ring for young boys A exhibitionist stepdad who forces his daughter to take baths with him A young girl who has a special brain implant that makes her uncontrollably aroused A man who cuts the holes out of his pocket and tells little girls there is candy in his pockets A story that somehow involves a young girl and a chastity belt A roomful of little girls who are training themselves for penetration by practicing on mounted dildos |