Walk
> > Reverend Mike was winding up the service.
"There will always be problems in the world. But if we use them as an excuse to act selfishly, we only make them worse. So look inside yourself. See if there are different choices you can make that go beyond you. Until we make a sacrifice for the good of another, we cannot know the good life."
Sacrifice? Temptation? How did Noel get into this mess?
This wasn't about Angela's gift. Noel had been pretending to assume a burden that was not his to bear. Noel had acted badly. He'd let his weakness get the better of him. He had sacrificed his own emotional well-being to help another.
No. This was nothing so noble as misguided sacrifice. Nothing so passive as succumbing to temptation.
This was about selfishness.
Noel selfishly using Angela to recapture his past.
Ricky selfishly using his father's naivete and his girlfriend's emotional state to satisfy teenage lust.
Angela selfishly teasing the Aquinos to avoid dealing with her problems.
It was going to stop now. Until he could get her out of his house, he was going to set some ground rules. For everyone.
Noel sat for a long time in the car.
"Hey Dad, are we gonna go?"
"Yeah," Noel said slowly.
"We're gonna have a talk, aren't we?" Ricky was almost belligerent.
"Watch your tone."
"If it's about 'appropriate behavior' again, maybe we should start with the way you were staring at Angela last night."
His disrespect was shocking. Even if Noel did deserve to be chastised, it was a lot to take it from his son, whose own behavior of late had been less than exemplary.
"Suddenly you think because you've fucked a girl you know everything about how a man behaves?"
"Jesus, Dad."
"Don't take the Lord's name in vain."
There was a long moment of simmering silence.
Finally Noel spoke. "Both of you have been acting like dogs in heat. I suppose that's my fault for letting her stay with us. But you need to understand that just because there are extenuating circumstances, that doesn't mean all sense of decency goes right out the window."
"Is this just a practice run, or am I gonna get different hypocritical bullshit when we get home?"
Noel slammed on the brakes.
"That's *ENOUGH*!" he bellowed. "One more word out of you and, the Lord as my witness, you will find out that you're not too old to get the belt."
Ricky glowered, but there was a twinge of fear in his eyes.
Noel took a deep breath. The situation was way out of control, but Ricky's moment of fear helped Noel put the cork on it.
Then Ricky popped it back off.
"Bring it," he said, quietly.
Noel was incredulous. "*What*?"
"You heard me. Bring it."
"Now you think you can take your old man."
"I'm sure not gonna bend over and let you whip my ass with a belt like a scared little boy. But if you think trying it is gonna win you points with Angela, bring it."
Win points with Angela? "What the hell has gotten into you?"
"It's called love, Dad. I love Angela. I know you hoped maybe it was just a phase, or that I'd get my rocks off and get tired of her, but it's not like that. And I'm not gonna let you take her from me."
"I never thought that about her!" That wasn't entirely true. "If I thought she was just a phase, I never would have let her into my house!" That was true. "And if it was love, you wouldn't be talking about her like some kind of possession."
"Jesus, Dad! I thought you were being really cool about all of this. I thought you *understood*. But then I find out you're only waiting for your chance to put the moves on her yourself!"
"Ricky! Is that what you think? Is *that* all you think of me?"
"What am I supposed to think? I see the way you look at her. I see the way you *act* around her."
"Do you see the way *she* acts?"
"What are you talking about?"
"The sexy little outfits, the way she bounces around the house playing Miss Suzy Homemaker, the fancy dinners... you think she's doing all that domestic stuff for you?"
"Jesus, Dad, listen to yourself. You're imagining things. You sound like a desperate old man."
"I didn't imagine the hand in my lap last night!"
"That was an accident! For God's sake, Dad, you're losing it! She doesn't *want* you! The clothes and stuff, that's just the way she is!"
"Then why does she keep acting the same way your mom did when she was her age?"
"Dammit, Dad, Angela's not mom! Mom's dead!"
Noel was suddenly very quiet. He looked straight ahead with a thousand-yard stare.
"Rick, get out of the car."
"What for? So we can duke it out right here on the street?"
"Get out of the car, Rick, before I come around and drag you out."
"I'd like to see you try."
Noel's head snapped around, fixing his son with a fiery glare. "Do you *really* think you can kick my ass? I'm still bigger and stronger than you. I'm a police officer. I know how to disable a hostile suspect. And a lot more than that. Now get *out*... of the *car*..." Noel's eyes narrowed. "Do NOT fuck with me, son."
"Fine." Ricky slammed the door. "Now what?" he yelled through the open window.
"You're a big man now. You figure it out."
Noel's hand shook on the window-up button as he pulled away, leaving Ricky to look after him in amazement.
"Angela?"
The house was quiet.
Noel checked the living room. Empty.
He checked the kitchen. Not there.
It took effort to keep harshness from his voice. "Angela, you still in bed?"
Noel checked the bedrooms, the bathrooms.
No sign of her.
Maybe the back yard.
"Getting a little sun before the weather turns cold?" he said hopefully, staving off the panic in his voice.
Nothing.
"Angela!"
Noel looked for a note. There was none.
That's the trouble with her, Noel said to himself, trying not to lose the head of confrontational steam he'd built up. She's selfish and irresponsible.
Where did she go? Panic began to set in. He'd underestimated last night's faux pas. She'd figured it all out. She knew all about the perverted obsession of her boyfriend's old man. What would she do next? Who might she tell?
Don't be selfish, Noel. What about Angela? Maybe she doesn't even realize how you... feel. Or maybe she does and she thinks it's her fault. Maybe she's distraught with guilt.
Noel suddenly felt a crashing wave of regret. How could he have considered throwing Angela out? Knowing what she'd been through? Knowing the only thing she had left to go back to? Knowing how Ricky might react?
Hold on now, Noel, it's only been a couple of hours since you last saw her. Maybe she just went for a walk. (Or a flight.)
Check her room.
Noel exploded into a sprint down the hall, bursting into the spare bedroom. Hands threw open the closet. Heart sank. Her stuff was gone.
Dresser drawers yanked open. Empty.
Noel's shoulder hammered the door frame in his hurry to the bathroom.
No perfume. No makeup bag. No little pink Hello Kitty toothbrush.
Frantic, Noel called Dr. Ward.
"Hello, Dr. Ward? This is Detective Noel Aquino."
"Oh, hi, Noel! What's up?" Her voice seemed to be hiding concern with a playful tone.
"It's Angela. She skipped church this morning, and when I came home, all her stuff is gone. Did you meet with her recently? Did she say anything to you?"
"Noel," Dr. Ward's tone was chastising, "you know I can't tell you that."
Noel gasped in exasperation. "Emma..." Noel paused; in spite of what she'd just said, for some unknown reason he got the feeling that it would be better to address her professionally. "Dr. Ward," he amended, "I'm worried about her. Something..." Noel hesitated to say anything about last night; but surely she would keep it in confidence... "Something happened last night..." Dr. Ward didn't have to know *what*, exactly... assuming Angela hadn't already told her. "An episode," he said, trying to frame a misleading euphemism with her professional terminology, "and it left her a little shaken up. Maybe more than I thought. I'm worried about her." You said that already, Noel.
"Well," Dr. Ward said slowly, "Angela is a big girl, and she can take care of herself. I'm sure she'll be all right."
"But she doesn't have-"
"She's eighteen years old, Noel. And she's not your daughter. I know you want to help her, and you have helped her, but recovery includes learning to stand on your own two feet. She'll be fine."
"Is that your professional opinion?" Noel probed. Maybe she couldn't directly tell him if Angela had gone to see her, but if she could make an informed clinical decision...
"Yes, that is my professional opinion." Dr. Ward seemed a little defensive. "Knowing her, she'll even send you the money when she gets it."
Noel darkened. It wasn't like that. How could Dr. Ward think he was only worried about the money?
But worse, Dr. Ward's comment seemed to confirm Noel's fear.
Angela was gone. And she wasn't coming back.