Contents

Girl Scout Nookies Stories
Your beloved author couldn't turn down the opportunity to rip off... I mean, to appear personally in three (so far) stories set in the very popular Girl Scout Nookies story world made popular by writers with better talent. And better luck.

Odorous Poetry  April 29, 2005  703 words  (nosex, humor)
Your beloved author follows the advice of his Muse, CJ, and pens some Odorous Poetry. That was what she said, wasn't it?.

Wynter & Jimmy
The sequel to Wynter has begun. Wynter and Jimmy have decided they are “just friends,” and Susie Middleton is not happy about that.

A*F*T*S  May 5, 2004  3,448 words  (Mf, f-solo, pett, nosex, humor)
In this humorous attempt at deliberate bad writing your beloved author faces down an irate father while armed only with blazing wit and wet underwear. Or maybe just wet underwear.

A Fifth of Djinn  April 3, 2004  4,773 words  (no-sex)
What good is getting your wish if you can never remember it?

cmsix and the Lapdance  February 25, 2005  1,402 words  (nosex humor)
A fancy redhead pulls a fast one on th' world-famous ASSM and Stories Online eeerotic writer cmsix, thinkin' he's dumber'n sun-dried cowflop. But is ole cmsix really that dumb, or is he slicker'n vaseline childproofin' a doorknob? Y'all grab y'self a Lone Star longneck, sit back, and decide for y'all's own self.

Dancing Dyan  August 28, 2003  277 words  (MF, humor)
Dyan doesn't hop into bed immediately.

G’Night, Pixie  December 30, 2004  27,631 words  (MF Mf solo oral anal group inc cons M/reluc caution)
While shipwrecked on a deserted tropical island with his wife and daughter, Doug Bryant struggles with his dark secret.  WARNING: this is an experimental story and does not have my typical ending.

Hero  August 18, 2003  300 words  (M-solo)
What happens when a dweeb saves the life of the most popular girl at school?

Sacrifices  March 22, 2004  2,873 words  (MF, magic)
The War of Good and Evil, as any other, turns on the sacrifices each side is willing to suffer when required.

The Child Molester's Handbook  June 27, 2003  3,836 words  (M-solo nosex humor)
Can a fifty-year-old book turn a loser into the ultimate pervert with today's children? Don't ask Norman's dog, "Kitty."

Thoughts  February 24, 2004  2,161 words  (MF rom nosex)
A college senior at Mardi Gras meets a beautiful woman, a vision that will dwell in his thoughts forever.

Wynter and the Curmudgeon  October 27, 2004  1,765 words  (nosex, humor)
Wynter's favorite uncle takes her to La Taverna, where she meets a variety of strange people, to include a very curmudgeonly fellow.

Novels & Serials

Wynter

Wynter 1: Daddy's Little Nurse  April 22, 2003  20,734 words  (Mg dog-solo g-mastM g-solo rom ped inc cons)
Eleven-year-old Wynter learns many new and exciting skills when her helpless father's nurse is stranded away from their mountain home.

Wynter 2: Daddy's Little Student  July 7, 2003  26,488 words   (Mg rom ped inc cons solo oral toys 1st)
Wynter discovers oral sex isn't yucky and wants her father to teach her one more new skill before Nurse Carter returns.

Wynter 3: Mother's Little Helper  December, 2003  17,473 words  (Mg rom ped inc cons mast)
The return of both Nurse Carter and Wynter's mother causes two serious dilemmas for Wynter and her father and could bring their new relationship to an end.

Wynter & Jimmy

Wynter & Jimmy Part One: Just Friends  May 07, 2005  32,624 words  (Mg MF oral solo pett toys rom ped inc cons slow)
Now that she lives in town, Wynter and Jimmy have become “just friends.” Suzie believes their relationship runs deeper and plots to take back control of Her Man.

Wynter & Jimmy Part Two: Best Friends  (Coming Soon)

Wynter & Jimmy Part Three  

Yana and the Neutron Bomb  July 26, 2003  1,098 words  (MF humor)
A pretty Soviet graduate student and her shaved babushka travel to the West to salvage her graduation project at the Josef Stalin Institute for Blowing Things Up in Tblisi, Georgia.

Yana and the Small Problem  December 5, 2003  1,553 words  (MF humor)
Our sexy Soviet scientist seeks a solution to a startling situation.

Yana and the Three Professors  July 4, 2004  1,759 words  (MF humor)
The sexy Soviet scientist must travel to Omsk to consult with Comrade Professors Briss, Mogen, and Mohel on a problem of cutting edge technology.

Jack Pack

Jack Pack Book 1  March 24, 2003  37,909 words in 9 chapters
(MF Mg Mg+ gg 1st M-solo g-solo rom cons ped inc)
Twelve-year-old Cyndi loans her father to virgin cousin Megan because Megan believes semen will make her bush grow.

The Fuquits

The Fuquits: Mister Stinky  May 7, 2003  7,591 words  (Fg bg MF Mg bW solo anal oral exhib rom ped inc humor)
Horny sixth-grader Fylicia teaches her double-crossing history teacher "Stinky" Stengler that "You don't fuck with a Fuquit."

The Fuquits: Reverend Meeks  September 27, 2003    6,013 words  (bg, inc, pett, bd, toys, Mg pett, cons, humor)
Caught in "the act" by a nosy preacher, Freddie and Fylicia decide that a good offense is the best defense.

The Forgotten Helms

Forgotten Helms: The Picnic  July 25, 2003  5,141 words  (MF cons pett nosex ScFi humor)
Dwarf Gryphon Lehrer's dalliance with horny halfling Miss Robyn Teatmounds is interrupted by a severely out-of-place elf.

Girl Scout Nookies

These are my contributions to an interrelated series of stories with a common theme (GSN Stories), written by several authors. Some, but not all, of those other stories are linked to these. A link to a collection of all GSN stories will appear here when the collection site is established.

Girl Scout Nookies En Passant  March 24, 2005  2,075 words  (nosex humor scoffing)
Your beloved author appears in a trio of situations where Girl Scouts selling... stuff... appear at his front door. Not to be confused with other Girl Scout Nookie stories that appear coincidentally similar, if you know what's good for me.

Girl Scout Wookiees  April 4, 2005  3,206 words  (nosex humor hair fish scoffing sneering scowling)
Your beloved author has two mortgages on his house, a neighbor keeping him under surveillance, and, at his new front door, four extremely hairy Girl Scouts from Outer Space who want to sell him a free ride on their space ship.

Girl Scout Crookies  April 29, 2005  3,219 words  (nosex, humor, scoffing, sneering, scowling, eye-rolling, dog farts)
Your beloved author now needs two jobs to pay the three mortgages on his house. How could it get any worse, you ask? Well, the doorbell is ringing.