HAPPY? (Chapter 57)

It was a month after Warren's first encounter with Alexa, just before Halloween, and she had kept her word.

It had been a whirlwind. Four different girls, besides Alexa, and all had left raving. Warren had thought about that. He supposed he should be getting a big head by now. He wasn't. He was glad about that. He enjoyed it. He liked to see the lady he was in bed with satisfied. It wasn't any big gift, it wasn't any secret. It was just caring that his partner enjoyed herself. Apparently, from some of the stories that he was hearing, he was in the minority. But, it really was important to him. He knew why, too. Alexa had asked him that.

"Warren, you know I've told you that most guys don't put so much emphasis on a girl's pleasure. Why do you?"

"Different reasons. It's a combination. First, I'm that kind of guy, anyway, I suppose. Second, I had a good teacher." He smiled at that.

"Sophia?"

"Sophia. Third, when you spend the first three-plus years of your sexual life making love, exclusively with one brief exception, to someone you are totally in love with, it becomes important."

"You were so in love with her, her pleasure was important to you."

"Right. And, the fourth reason, is that I got lucky the first time."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, Sophia had had five different partners, over two years, before me. And, on our first night together, I gave her her very first non-self-induced orgasm. In fact, I gave her her first three that night. And it was completely out of instinct, I had little idea what I was doing, I just guessed right. But the look on her face, after the first one? I will never forget that. It's stayed with me."

Alexa sat for a minute, looking at Warren. "I understand, now. I think it's a wonderful thing. She gave you a great gift, you know." She sighed. "But, whenever you talk about her, your eyes get grey. Did you know that?"

Warren laughed. "My eyes are hazel. They change color according to my mood."

"I figured that. My little sister has hazel eyes. They don't get grey much, though. Only when she's in a lot of pain." She took a deep breath. "Warren, I suppose I thought that, if I got you a lot of girls, you'd forget about Sophia. But that's not going to happen, is it?"

"No."

"I guess I was also hoping that one of them would sweep you off your feet."

"Sorry. Hey, if you didn't do it……" They both laughed. "But, you need to know this. It has made things better. I'm not over Sophia, no, but at least I'm not sitting in my room every night staring at the walls. I go out. I have fun. I go to bed and have fun. Alexa, it is fun, especially with you, and it's been a great help. Getting me over Sophia is out of the question. Keeping me from feeling sorry for myself has been accomplishment enough, believe me. Thank you."

"You're welcome, and I'm glad of that."

"I need to get to the rink."

"I'll come watch." She often did.

When they got to the rink, and Warren had changed into his practice clothes and skates, and was warming up on the ice, Alexa stood by the boards.

"Warren?"

"Hm?"

"Why do you still come and practice, twice a week, by yourself?"

"It's good exercise. The ice time is paid for."

"Would you ever skate with anyone else?"

"No."

"So, you're still hoping, aren't you?"

"I suppose. This is her ice time, too. I guess I always hope she'll show up. Meantime, it is good exercise. And I like to skate, as long as it's by myself. Too bad there's not a singles ice dance."

"What about regular singles skating?"

Warren laughed. "You obviously have never seen my feeble attempts at jumping!"

Alexa grinned at that. "How long has it been since you skated with Sophia?"

"A while. We did both times during orientation week, and during the first week of class. The next couple of weeks, we didn't, because I was so busy. Then she dumped me."

"You hardly saw her at all those first three weeks of class before she dumped you, right?"

"Right. I was rather unprepared for my workload. I thought I went to a tough high school. In fact, I did go to a tough high school. I think I overreached, though, when I planned my classes for this semester. And it hit me like a ton of bricks."

"And Sophia didn't handle it well."

"What do you think? She's not here, right?"

"Did you explain it to her?"

"I tried."

Alexa thought for a minute. She knew she was about to push the envelope, here, but she felt she needed to. "Warren, did you study a lot in high school?"

"Oh, yeah."

"How did Sophia handle it then?"

"A lot better. Of course, I studied at her house more than I studied anywhere else."

"Warren, why couldn't you do that here?"

"Huh?"

"Study together. It might have helped."

"Well, we both had roommates. She had her own room at home. Senior year, after her stepfather and stepsister moved in, she moved into the basement. We had all the privacy in the world. I practically moved in."

"You could have found a way around that. We're talking about studying, not sex. There are other places. Besides which, Tim is hardly ever in your room."

"True. I don't know, I guess. I just got overwhelmed with the workload, and didn't handle it well. I needed a while to ramp up my time management. It's better now."

"Warren," she took a deep breath. "I need to say this. Your breakup with Sophia was not all her fault."

"I suppose you're right. Although breaking up, after all the time we were together, was an extreme overreaction"

"Maybe so, but if you can take some responsibility, what that means is this--if you go to her, it wouldn't be the complete act of surrender you seem to think it is."

"Alexa, you're too fucking logical for my own good."

She laughed at that. Warren continued, "Are you trying to get rid of me?"

"You're my friend. I care about you. I want you to be happy. You're not going to be truly happy until you get back together with Sophia. And don't tell me 'it's over' or 'I have to forget her' because you haven't forgotten her, and it's not over, not in your mind, and the proof of that is you being here, on this ice."

"YOU TELL HIM!" came a bellow from behind him. He turned. It was his floormate, Papa Bear.

"Hi, Paul." Alexa greeted him.

"Hiya, beautiful. You too, Lobster-Breath."

"Why do you call him that?" Alexa asked.

"He's from Boston. They eat lobster there, don't they?"

"I love lobster," Warren interjected. "Papa Bear, what the hell are you doing here?"

"Looking for you. Tim told me where you were. I forgot it was your 'glide around the ice aimlessly and hope Sophia shows up' day."

Warren couldn't help but laugh. "You saw through me, too?"

"Of course. Papa Bear is all-knowing, all-seeing." He had worked his way to the stands, and planted himself next to Alexa. "Like I said, I was looking for you. I wanted to hang out, see if you wanted to go find something other than dorm slop for supper."

"That sounds appealing."

"You too, Lex, if you want."

"Naaah. After I watch Twinkletoes twirl the ice a few times, I have stuff to do."

"Too bad. You brighten the scenery." Alexa giggled at him. She had gotten to know Paul pretty well through Warren, and was used to him. "Anyhow, Warren, are you going to take this pretty girl's advice, or what?"

"Oh, I don't know. Look, remember, she dumped me for another guy. And I have no idea if she is still with him, or what."

"She's not, I know that for a fact. I also have information that he was gone five days after she dumped you, and that it was very unpleasant. But I don't know any more specifics." Papa Bear informed him.

"I didn't know you knew this much. Where did you get this? Why didn't you tell me?"

"I have my sources, and you never asked. I thought you knew. Shit, Warren, you've seen her. I was with you, the last time, in the student union last week. Did she look happy to you?"

"No. I think I need the whole story."

"Can you ask her roommate?" Alexa wondered.

"I don't know. I don't know Elise very well." Just then, he clapped his hands together. "But I know who I can ask! I don't know her number at school, but I can get it."

"Who?" Alexa asked.

"Jessie, that's who! And I happen to be going away this weekend. To Chicago. To Northwestern, as a matter of fact, to see Crash."

"Aaaah," Paul said. Both Paul and Alexa knew all about Crash and Jessie. "And Crash still talks to her."

"Regularly. They broke up, but that was just a convenience thing. They've dated in college, but I know for a fact that they are looking very forward to the Christmas reunion. And they talk all the time."

"So, while you're there, you'll have Crash call her and you'll pump her for info."

"You got it, Papa Bear."

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Sophia had barely thought of ice dancing since the breakup with Warren. She only thought of it when someone goaded her about it--usually her mother. She had begun to dread the phone calls from home. She was just picking up the phone for another one.

"Hi, Mom."

"Hello, sweetheart. Have you talked to Warren yet?"

Sophia sighed. "Do you have to start every conversation with the same question?"

"Until you give me the answer I want, yes."

"It's not going to happen, Mother. It's over."

"Are you happy with that?"

Sophia didn't say anything.

"That's what I thought."

"Mom, it's complicated."

"How complicated can it be? You broke up with him. It was a mistake. So you tell him that."

"It's not that easy."

"I have his cel phone number, you know."

"MOTHER! You would not DARE!"

"I'm tempted." Sophia heard Ellen's sigh on the other end of the phone. "Sophia, you haven't done something this self-destructive since….well, since Scott."

"Breaking up with my boyfriend is self-destructive?"

"Breaking up with your boyfriend on an impulse, and then regretting it later and not doing anything about it, that is what is self destructive. Plus, I know you're not taking care of yourself."

"What?"

"Last time I tried to call you, you weren't there. So, I had a little chat with Elise. You know, Elise, your roommate? She says you're not eating, you're not sleeping, you mope around all day, and you look like something out of the night of the living dead. "

"She's exaggerating."

"Is she. Honey, please go talk to Warren. Fix this."

"Mom, it's unfixable. He deserves better than me."

Ellen took a deep breath. "Honey, do you really think that a guy who put so much hard work into helping you build up your self-esteem would agree with that?"

Sophia inhaled sharply at that.

"That's what I thought," Ellen said. "Think about it, Sophie. You thought you weren't good enough for him once before, remember? He disagreed with you then."

"That's different. I hadn't hurt him then."

"You're right about one thing. You did hurt him. But staying away from him won't fix that hurt. For either of you."

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