Biography: Caitlyn Stanford

CAITLYN STANFORD

Caitlyn Claire Delaney came to her parents late in life; her father Samuel was 44, and her mother Linda was 40. They had already had one son, Nathaniel, and he was such a handful that any plans for having more were immediately put on hold. Nonetheless, when Caitlyn was conceived, her parents prayed to the Lord above for love, to the Savior for energy and to the Holy Ghost for patience, and welcomed her into the world.

Caitlyn's father was a manager at a defense contractor, and her mother had taught school; both were devout Christians, and raised both their children to be strong in that faith. They encouraged selflessness, introspection, a strong personal relationship with God, and pride in their faith. To this day, all four are active in their respective churches. Her parents are also deeply conservative, which informed a number of their decisions in raising her. For instance, caitlyn did not go to school: her parents, feeling that God was not given an appropriate central place in secular American public education, home-schooled their children themselves. Finally, Caitlyn was blessed enough to have most of her extended family nearby; her mother placed great emphasis on family, and lived within a ten-minute drive of her brother (Uncle Max) and parents (Gramma and Grampa Cassidy).

Caitlyn was very bright and was often taught the same material as her brother, who was four years older than her. She also began harp lessons at the age of six, after seeing a harpist play for the first time when she was six. He had only a lap harp in a Celtic design with 36 strings, but that just meant that it was easier for Caitlyn to pluck out some rudimentary chords. Her parents soon found out why harpists are not prevalent—a good harp can cost more than a good car—but gamely encouraged their daughter nonetheless. By the time she entered college Caitlyn was also an accomplished oboist and could get by on the piano (a trait common to many musicians).

Her social life, however, did not flourish so well. While a number of other families sent their children to Mrs. Delaney to be home-schooled in the same "class," Caitlyn was never close with any of them. She had a strong friendship with her brother Nathan, but he had made other friends through church and did not always want a younger sister tagging along. Caitlyn discovered the Internet at age 14 and immediately began making friends there; she also began to hone her talents as a writer, occasionally participating in play-by-email RPGs. Regardless, Caitlyn felt isolated from many of her peers—a feeling that was only enhanced by her early entrance to college at the age of sixteen.

Caitlyn attended Shellview State for three years and then joined her brother at Greenfield University. She double-majored in Music (her real passion) and Accounting (her back-up, on her parents' insistence that she go into a "real" industry). Greenfield was not the largest of colleges, and its Music department was fairly small; while everyone there was talented, some were still better than others, and they tended to rise to the top. Four of those experts became the most important people in her life. Three were Meredith Levine, Christa Sternbacher and Brandon Chambers, who became her very first friends she'd ever had in her life. Meredith and Brandon and Christa were all older than her, and far more worldly—they had long-term relationships, financial investments, political leanings, and even sex!—but she enjoyed their company nonetheless.

The fourth was Jonathan Stanford, her future husband.

Jon was not a Music major, though neither were Brandon and Meredith; he simply sang in the choirs because he liked to. When Caitlyn first saw him she thought him handsome, but rather uncouth: loud and confident, in a way that grated on the nerves, and seemingly without faith. Yet their shared interests, both in music and (as it turned out) in writing, began to draw them together, and before she knew it they were friends too.

But that was the only thing that was going well. Caitlyn had been slowly losing hope in the future and in herself. Though she had friends, they were often preoccupied with other matters (Brandon and Meredith with each other, Christa with her boyfriend Zach, all four of them with friends they'd left behind when coming to college) and Caitlyn wasn't sure how to break into the bustle. Nathan had graduated and then, of all things, packed up and moved away, claiming a need for independence; their parents had, thereafter, essentially disowned him. Being accompanied by at least one pair of lovebirds, Caitlyn was beginning to feel keenly the lack of romance in her life; she'd never been on a date, and everyone who had ever asked her out had been objectionable for one reason or another (for instance, the guy who was twice her age). And, in the wake of Nathan's departure, her parents were beginning to assert their dominion over Caitlyn more strongly. They seemed unable to leave her alone, wanting to know everything she'd planned and being critical of all those plans once she told them. The pressure was beginning to get to her. One day she woke up and thought: What if I just retire into my own mind? I have my characters there, that I write about; they love me, in a way no one does in real life. What if I just... Folded up, and joined them?

It was a good idea, and she was seriously contemplating doing it. In the safety of her own mind, surrounded by people who loved her for who she was, she could at least be happy. But some dim instinct warned her, Talk about this. Tell somebody about this first. Ask, before you do it. Is there anyone you could say this stuff to? She picked a psychology major, one who should understand human thought; she picked a writer, someone who would understand the allure of the retreat; she picked a friend, who had always been kind to her. She picked Jon.

Later, he told her that it was during that very conversation that he began to love her.

They courted for eighteen months, an eighteen months made bumpy by her parents' hostility. Caitlyn was nineteen, and they disliked the idea of losing their little girl—especially so soon after losing their little boy. Nonetheless, the love Jon and Caitlyn bore for each other could not be denied. By the time three months had passed, they were discussing what might happen if they got married. At six months, they were discussing what would happen when they got married. A year after that, Jon officially proposed. Caitlyn said yes.

Three weeks later, Caitlyn tried an experiment. She had a number of rings which she wore every day; she wondered if she could sneak Jon's engagement ring onto her finger without her mother noticing. She didn't want to have to hide that symbol of her love if she didn't have to. Unfortunately, the experiment failed: whether by bad luck or some other force, her mother noticed right away, and grounded Caitlyn for the rest of her life, revoking her car privileges, her TV privileges and modem privileges, and declaring that some family member or another would drive Caitlyn to school from now on. By now, Caitlyn was in graduate school, pursuing a Master's degree in Harp Performance, and was not so keen on having her independence curtailed. Nonetheless, what could she do?--move out? She had no money, no place to go, and certainly no recourse for continuing her education and lifestyle.

Nonetheless, move out she did. At her brother's urging, Jon appeared at her front doorstep not three hours later. Caitlyn, possessed of a recklessness she would both regret and celebrate later, asked him to take her away. He did. Unfortunately, the Bible frowns on pre-marital cohabitation, and Caitlyn knew that whatever practical measures her life took from now on would be involved with Jon. It was a crazy idea, but they did it. On December 10, thirty-five days before her 21st birthday, Jonathan Rupert Stanford married Caitlyn Claire Delaney.

Of course, under those circumstances, things were rocky for a while; their first ninety days as a married couple were particularly difficult. Nonetheless, Caitlyn loved Jon and loved being married to him. They had long been united in their goals of raising a family and raising it well, without the mistakes and clumsiness their parents had inflicted on them; they were (for the most part) wise enough to compromise when things got rough; and even though Caitlyn had never had any interest in physical intimacy, she grew to take great pleasure in sex and sexual matters. Everyone who knows them believes that they will be able to make good lives for themselves—her parents included, though it took a great deal of cajoling to make them admit it.

Caitlyn Stanford is continuing her studies while working part time, and she and Jon are already planning their next few years so that they can begin to have children as soon as possible (both being somewhat worried that their parents' advanced ages may have lowered their efficacy as parents). They stay in touch with their friends and continue to be active at Caitlyn's church, where she is slowly nurturing Jon's faith and the wealth of human compassion in his heart. They make love eagerly and often, and Caitlyn is beginning to take a more active role in their exploration and experimentation. While they look forward to having a family in the future, they also take the time to remind themselves that, in each other, they already have one now.

Caitlyn, though based on a real person, does not look anything like that real person; the real one has blonde hair and blue eyes. But I'd already used that for many of my previous female leads (Meredith, Heather Norwellyn, Catheryne Talnor, and most lately Madison Bechtel), so I made a conscious decision to deviate from it. Later, I came to realize that, in fact, I think Caitlyn's particular features to be more attractive than the blonde/blue archetype; Jon, of course, would agree.

• The archetypal Caitlyn
• Caitlyn, in anticipation
• A Jon's-eye view. The girl in this picture does not quite match the others, but it's cute.