Lucifer Takes the Bus

by Arthur Saxon
meganeura@hotmail.com

The bus was almost full. Lucifer quickly discounted an empty seat next to a large, sweaty man in his fifties, and moved on towards the back. Then he spotted another empty seat; this one was next to a young, shapeless, mousy-looking woman with straggly, greasy black hair and an unfortunate case of acne.

“Excuse me,” said Lucifer, “may I sit here?” When she shrugged in response, he sat down next to her, and hefted his briefcase on to his lap. “Nice day, isn’t it?” he remarked. “I find the rain so ... refreshing.”

The young woman grunted in response, and turned toward the window. Clearly, she was not in the mood to converse. Lucifer drummed his fingers on his briefcase for a couple of minutes, then he began humming to himself. But he was a talker, and it was not long before he tried again. “Are you a student?” he asked. “I must admit, I do miss the university life. Truly the best of times and the worst of times.”

The young woman said nothing for a moment, but then she nodded. “You’re not wrong,” she agreed.

“I bet I can guess what you’re studying,” said Lucifer. “Hmm, not business ... not medicine, not law... Perhaps engineering ... but no. And not the hard sciences. The humanities, I’m thinking. Maybe history...? Yes, I’m going to go with history. That’s my final answer.”

The young woman smirked a little behind her veil of hair. “Economics,” she replied.

“Economics?” said Lucifer, baffled. “Really? Wow. I didn’t see that coming. Do you ... enjoy it?”

“I hate it,” she replied sourly. “It was my dad’s idea.”

“That’s awful, I’m so sorry,” said Lucifer. “Parents think they know what’s best for their children, but sometimes they just ... they don’t get it.”

“That’s it exactly,” agreed the young woman. “My dad wants me to understand the importance of money, and how the world works – but only from his limited perspective. But I don’t care about that materialist bollocks.”

“And why should you?” said Lucifer. “You have your own path to forge. You should follow your heart; never mind your parents’ expectations.”

“Easier said than done,” replied the young woman ruefully. “But they pretty much pay for everything. They could easily decide to stop doing that.”

“Have you thought of getting a job, and paying your own way?” Lucifer inquired.

The woman shuddered. “I’m not good at getting jobs,” she muttered.

“Fair enough,” said Lucifer. “Some find it easier than others. But let’s assume you had some kind of evening job that allowed you to pay your own way. What would you choose to study?”

The young woman did not hesitate even for a moment. “Mythology,” she said. “Particularly Celtic and European pagan mythology.”

“Now that’s more like it!” said Lucifer cheerfully. “So, what’s stopping you from pursuing that? Is it just the fact that your parents will cut you off if you switch subjects?”

“Yeah, pretty much,” acknowledged the young woman. “They think my interests are frivolous and won’t get me anywhere in life.”

“Okay, so we’re back to hitting the job market,” said Lucifer. “What have you tried?”

The young woman frowned slightly. “Look,” she said, “I appreciate you taking an interest...”

“Lucifer,” said Lucifer, extending his hand.

The woman raised her eyebrows in surprise as she turned to look at him more directly. “Like ... the Devil?”

Lucifer chuckled. “Yes, that’s me, I’m Satan himself. I’ll grant you a wish in exchange for your soul.” Then his smile faded, as he saw her looking uneasy. “Sorry, that was funnier in my head. My parents were LaVeyan Satanists for a while, and they thought it would be cool, I suppose, to give me this name. But don’t worry – I left my pitchfork at home.”

The young woman relaxed a little, and shook his hand. “My name’s Nicola,” she said. “Are you a Satanist too, then?”

“God no,” said Lucifer, shaking his head. “I’m just your common or garden atheist.”

“And what do you do?” asked Nicola. “I mean, for work?”

“I’m a salesman,” said Lucifer, “for a cosmetics company. We’re pretty new – just getting started, really. But we’ve got some pretty cool products that we’re hoping will make a big splash in the market.”

“Uh-huh,” said Nicola, without much enthusiasm. “Not really my kind of job.”

“It’s certainly not for everyone,” said Lucifer. “Honestly, I didn’t aspire to be a salesman when I was at university. But when you have a gift for salesmanship and you really believe in your products, it can be pretty rewarding work.” He popped open his briefcase, opened it up, and took out a small tube of ointment. “See this stuff? Clears up acne almost immediately. I’ve never seen anything like it. I’ve seen girls and boys in tears of happiness after using it. That kind of thing ... it really makes you feel like you’re making the world a better place, you know?”

“I’m sure it does,” said Nicola, staring at the tube. “Um ... do you think it would work ... on me...? I haven’t had much luck with other products...”

“I have no doubt of it,” said Lucifer. “Want to try it? I’m allowed to give free demonstrations.”

Nicola hesitated. “What’s in it?” she asked.

“The active ingredient comes from a plant found only in Papua New Guinea,” said Lucifer. “It’s been used by the natives there for thousands of years. Our lab geeks finally managed to isolate the compound responsible for the skin cleansing and restoration. It’s kind of a miracle ingredient.”

This apparently sold it to Nicola. “May I, then?” she asked hopefully.

“Certainly!” said Lucifer, opening the tube. “Can you turn towards me and pull your hair back, please? And, um, I’d be failing in my duties if I didn’t ask this: may I take photos of you, before and after I apply the ointment?”

“Um, okay...” said Nicola uncomfortably. She pulled her hair back out of her face.

Her acne really was very severe. Lucifer raised his phone, and took a photo. “Okay,” he said. “Now hold still...” He squirted some ointment on to his fingers, then he began rubbing it into her right cheek. Slowly, making small circles, he worked his way around her entire face, from her forehead down to her chin. Her pockmarked, zit-infested skin glistened.

“How long does it take?” she asked. “I mean, how long before I know whether it’s worked or not?”

Lucifer pulled a hand mirror out of his briefcase, and gave it to her. “Take a look,” he said.

She took the mirror, held it up in front of her face, and gasped. “I can see them healing!” she exclaimed. “Oh my God! My face...” She continued to stare, mesmerised, as the pockmarks filled in, the yellow pimples shrank and disappeared, the bumps deflated, and the redness faded. Within five minutes, her skin was as smooth and fresh as a ten-year-old’s.

With tears in her eyes, she turned to Lucifer and said, “This is amazing! How can I ever thank you?”

“Don’t thank me yet!” said Lucifer. “This isn’t a permanent solution. You’ll need to reapply the ointment every couple of days, to prevent the acne from coming back.”

“Where can I buy more?” Nicola asked eagerly. “And how much is it?”

“It’s expensive,” Lucifer warned her. “But we have an online store. Here – the web address is on my card.” He pulled out a business card, and handed it to her.

“Thanks,” she said, putting it in her bag. Then she looked at herself in the mirror again. “I really ... I can’t believe the difference! I’m...” She tailed off.

“Pretty?” said Lucifer. “You certainly are. Your hair’s a little in need of attention, but I can take care of that for you if you like. I have a wonderful dry-wash, no-residue shampoo which I can let you try, free of charge.”

Nicola giggled. “Why not?” she said. “If you’re going to give me a makeover, it would be nice to do it properly! If you really don’t mind...”

“It would be my pleasure,” said Lucifer. “Turn around, please.”

The success of the acne cream had done a great deal to engender trust. With barely a moment’s hesitation, Nicola turned her back on Lucifer. Pulling a bottle out of his briefcase, he squirted some foam into his palm, and began to rub it into Nicola’s hair. Using both hands, he worked the foam all over her scalp, thoroughly washing and conditioning her hair. As the foam soaked in, the hair became drier, though it looked healthy and glossy. He took a hairbrush out of his briefcase, and carefully brushed her long, wavy black locks. He encountered no tangles at all.

“Oh my God!” exclaimed Nicola, looking in the mirror. “That’s unbelievable! You did all that in just five minutes?”

“Yup – our shampoo foam is quite amazing,” said Lucifer.

“The volume!” said Nicola in disbelief. “Good grief ... with what you’ve done to my skin and my hair, I look like a completely different person!” She turned around, and Lucifer was surprised to see tears in her eyes. He was even more surprised when she threw her arms around him. “Thank you!” she said. “Thank you...”

“You’re welcome!” said Lucifer. “I’m happy to have helped you. Is there anything else you’d like help with?”

Nicola bit her lip. “No,” she said reluctantly. “You’ve done more for me than I could ever have dreamed of. I couldn’t possibly ask for more.”

“Ask away!” said Lucifer cheerfully. “I’m always happy to be able to test my products. I can’t fix every problem, of course, but there’s no harm in asking, right? So spit it out; what’s on your mind?”

Nicola looked down at her knees, and said awkwardly, “I wish...”

“Be careful what you wish for!” Lucifer interrupted with a grin. “Particularly when you’re talking to a man named Lucifer!”

Nicola managed a half-smile, but it quickly faded. “I ... I kind of hate my ... my breasts,” she said quietly. “They’re very small, and sort of pointy. I don’t suppose you have some magical breast-enlarging potion in that briefcase of yours, do you?”

“Not a potion, no,” said Lucifer. “But I do have a gel with the properties you describe. The science is pretty complex, but it basically involves a carefully balanced cocktail of hormones that stimulate rapid proliferation of the fatty tissue in the breasts, along with corresponding building of the connective tissue and suspensory ligaments. The result, depending on dosage, is a larger breast with a pleasant shape and firmness. The more gel you use, the bigger your breasts will be.”

Nicola’s eyes widened. “Can you ... can you make me a ... a D-cup?”

“I can,” said Lucifer, nodding. “Are you sure you want to go that big, though? I’m sure the men will love it, but you might get annoyed by them talking to your chest. Women with larger breasts don’t tend to get taken as seriously as women with more average-sized breasts. It’s not right, of course, but it’s reality.”

“They do get boyfriends, though,” said Nicola. “I want the D-cups, please.”

“Okay,” said Lucifer. “Then let’s do it. You’ll need to remove your bra first, or this will quickly get rather uncomfortable.”

Nicola purses her lips, then nodded. She untucked her baggy t-shirt from the back of her ankle-length, flower-patterned skirt, then she reached up beneath the t-shirt to unhook her bra. Having pulled her arms out, she extracted the bra and tucked it into her handbag.

“Okay,” said Lucifer. “This is a one-time application, and it needs to be done right. I’m afraid I’m going to have to touch your breasts. Are you okay with me doing that? I’m not going to proceed unless I have your enthusiastic consent.”

Nicola shivered, but nodded. “If this is a trick, and you’ve gone through all of this just to cop a feel,” she said, “it’ll still have been worth it. So go ahead.”

“All right, turn to face me then,” said Lucifer. “And lift up your t-shirt; I’ll need to see what I’m doing.”

Nicola looked around nervously. “But people will see,” she said.

“I’m a pretty big guy,” said Lucifer. “I’ll block the view of the couple across the aisle. No-one else will see anything unless they stand up.”

“All right,” said Nicola. “Just try to be quick, okay?”

“This isn’t something I can rush,” said Lucifer, “but don’t worry; it won’t take long.”

Nicola nodded, then she turned her upper body to face him, and pulled up the front of her t-shirt. Her breasts were almost flat, with only a small area around the nipple emerging conically from the plane of the skin covering her ribcage.

Lucifer donned plastic gloves; it would not do for any of this stuff to soak into his own skin. He then squirted some gel into his palms, assessed the quantity, and squirted a little more. Dividing the gel equally between both hands, he began smearing it around both of Nicola’s tiny breasts, coating them thoroughly. After about twenty seconds, they were beginning to swell visibly.

Nicola gasped. “Oh ... that feels quite nice actually!” she said in a breathy voice. “Ohh ... I can feel them growing!” She stared down at her chest in fascination, watching her breasts slowly expand, rounding and filling out in all directions. After three minutes or so, the gel had all soaked into her flesh, and Lucifer dropped his hands.

Nicola’s breasts continued to grow, at a diminishing rate, for another minute or so. At this point, they looked perfect; just slightly on the large side of average. “How’s that?” asked Lucifer.

“They’re beautiful!” said Nicola in awe. “But ... I really do want them bigger than that. Can you make them bigger, but still look as good?”

“Certainly,” said Lucifer. “This is expensive stuff, though – I should really be charging you...”

Nicola pouted. “You can’t make it a free sample?”

“Well, it’s not like you’ll be coming back for more of this,” said Lucifer. “Not like the acne cream, which you’ll need more of.”

“Then I’ll pay,” said Nicola. “How much?”

“Hmm,” said Lucifer. “I’ll give you a student discount. Let’s say an even hundred. I know that’s...”

“Deal,” said Nicola immediately. “I’ll write you a cheque.”

“All right!” said Lucifer. “Are you sure you want them bigger...?”

“Yes,” said Nicola firmly. “For years I’ve hated my flat chest. I want big boobs!”

Lucifer nodded. “Here goes, then.” He squirted more gel into his gloved palms, and began massaging it into both of her newly enlarged breasts. Soon they were beginning to swell again, and as the gel soaked in, Nicola panted rapturously as she felt them grow bigger, and bigger. “Ohhh,” she moaned softly. “Yes ... more...”

Lucifer stopped rubbing, and watched in concern as Nicola’s breasts continued to enlarge. They slowed, then stopped, and Nicola sighed with satisfaction. “Wow,” she said, taking hold of her new breasts in her hands, and giving them an experimental squeeze. “I love them!”

“Good,” said Lucifer. “But perhaps you should pull your t-shirt down now...?”

“Hmm,” said Nicola thoughtfully. “Maybe they could be just a little bigger...”

“Any bigger,” said Lucifer, “and people will only see you as a pair of breasts with a woman attached. You’ll get work as a model, or as an actress in low-budget exploitation movies, but nobody in business or academia will take you seriously. Take it from someone who’s seen how top-heavy women are treated in both.”

“I think you’re wrong,” said Nicola. “The world is changing; attitudes are changing. Body-shaming is no longer okay. The shame is on those who treat people differently for how they look. Take it from someone who’s part of the new generation of undergraduates.”

“Those in charge are still mostly of your parents’ generation, though,” Lucifer pointed out.

“And some of them have yet to come around,” Nicola acknowledged. “But who do you think teaches the new liberalism? More gel please, Lucifer; I want them even bigger.”

“You’re going to find it hard to get bras that fit you,” said Lucifer with a sigh. “And they’ll give you back pain ... and they’ll get saggy faster. But if this is what you want...” He squirted a very small amount of gel into his hand.

“Nice try,” said Nicola, taking hold of the tube and squeezing it. A large volume of gel squirted out.

“Jeez!” said Lucifer. “You can’t possibly want that much!”

Nicola stared at the mound of gel nervously. But her obstinacy got the better of her. “Yes,” she said defiantly. “Go for it.”

Lucifer shrugged, and set about evenly applying the gel to both breasts. As he massaged them, they resumed their expansion, and Nicola closed her eyes, writhing her shoulders in pleasure. “Ohhh yes...” she murmured. The sensation of feeling her breasts growing was absolutely wonderful; almost orgasmic.

Lucifer shook his head as he watched Nicola’s breasts swelling to ever larger proportions. He massaged them thoroughly and gently, until all of the gel had disappeared. He stopped rubbing, and removed his gloves. When Nicola’s breasts had finished growing, he sighed. “Happy now?”

Nicola stared at her now very voluptuous chest. “Oh God!” she said. “They’re huge!” She grasped them with her hands, lifted them, and squeezed them. “But I love them! What cup size do you think I am now?”

“I can figure that out,” said Lucifer. “I have a tape measure.” He pulled his tape measure out of his briefcase, and ran the tape around Nicola’s back as she leaned forward. He first took her underbust measurement, then he measured her around the fullest part of her breasts. “Well, looks like you’re a 32GG. I really hope you don’t come to regret this, because I can’t reverse the growth.”

Nicola was still playing with her breasts in utter fascination. “I won’t regret it,” she promised him. “These things are amazing! I’m so happy that they’re part of me!”

“And I’m happy for you too,” said Lucifer. “Is there anything else you want done?”

“I don’t know!” said Nicola happily, as she pulled her t-shirt down. She looked down at her chest, and giggled. “My t-shirt’s so bulgy now!” Then she looked up at Lucifer. “What other magic ointments do you have?”

“There’s nothing magical about them!” said Lucifer. “A lot of hard science went into these products.”

“Yes yes,” said Nicola. “But what do you have?”

“Well, I have a depilatory cream,” said Lucifer. “Permanently deactivates hair follicles. You can use it on your legs, armpits, wherever ... and never have to shave those areas again. Because of the single-use aspect, though, I’d have to charge for that too...”

“How much?” asked Nicola. “For my armpits, legs, and, as you put it, ‘wherever’?”

“Forty,” said Lucifer. “After your student discount.”

“Deal,” said Nicola. “I’ll recoup that in no time, with what I save on shaving gel. Go ahead – can you reach up my sleeves?” She raised one arm.

Lucifer tried, but the sleeve was too snug-fitting. “You’ll have to take your arms out of the sleeves.”

Nicola responded by taking her t-shirt off entirely. “Try to shield me,” she said, looking around a little nervously. But then she looked down at her bare breasts, and sighed happily.

Lucifer applied some cream to his fingers, and rubbed it into Nicola’s right armpit. “There – that should do it.”

“No glove this time?” she inquired.

“I’m not worried about losing hair from my fingers,” said Lucifer.

“Fair enough,” said Nicola, and she turned slightly so he could do her other armpit.

“I have to admit,” said Lucifer, staring down at her chest, “that is a cracking set of boobs. A great testament to the efficacy of our product. I just hope you don’t get tired of lugging them around.”

Nicola grinned. “I won’t,” she said, pulling her t-shirt back on. “Can you do my legs now?”

“Of course,” said Lucifer. He started at her right ankle, and worked his way upward, as Nicola pulled her long skirt up higher and higher. She lifted her thigh, so that he could get all around it, and did not seem bothered as he rubbed cream all the way to the edge of her panties. Fascinated, she stroked her thigh, which was already completely hair-free and smooth.

“Okay,” said Lucifer. “Other leg?” She presented it, and once again, he rubbed the cream all the way up to her panties. “Um, would you like me to...”

“Yes please,” she said. “You have my permission to go inside my panties.” She hiked her skirt up to fully reveal her panties, which were bikini-cut and plain white. She held the waistband open, as Lucifer slipped his cream-covered fingers inside.

He found her pussy thickly thatched with hair. As he began rubbing the cream in, the hairs at first detached from her skin, then began to dissolve. After a minute or so, he was rubbing nothing but a gooey paste into her pubic area. He pushed his fingers deeper, massaging her labia, and smiled to himself. “You know,” he said, “most women would be at least a bit outraged by what I’m doing now.”

“I’m not most women,” said Nicola breathlessly, spreading her thighs and arching her back a little.

“You’re really this easy?” inquired Lucifer, amused, as he curled his middle finger and began to slide it into her vagina.

“Give me a break!” said Nicola, her cheeks reddening. “I’ve never had a boyfriend. Besides, with all you’ve done for me, I figure you’ve earned it.”

“No boyfriend at all?” asked Lucifer, intrigued. He slid his finger in as deep as it would go. “So this little virgin cunny has never felt a man’s cock?”

“Nope,” gasped Nicola. “If you want to be the first, be my guest. Like I said, you’ve earned it.”

Lucifer chuckled. “I might take you up on that later,” he said. “In less crowded a setting.” He withdrew his finger, then pushed his whole hand further back, working what was left of the cream between Nicola’s buttocks, around her anus. “All done,” he said, pulling his hand out of her panties. His fingers were streaked with a dark grey-brown goo, which he wiped off with a tissue fetched from his pocket. He handed her a couple more tissues. “You may want to wipe down there,” he said.

“Thanks,” she replied, sticking the tissues into her panties and wiping them around thoroughly. “Wow, I’m so smooth!” She pulled the tissues out, then she rummaged in her handbag for her cheque book. “A hundred and forty, I believe?”

“Yes,” said Lucifer. “Payable to Genet Cosmetics, please.”

Nicola made out the cheque, and handed it to him. “That’s a lot of money for a student,” she said, “and yet it still seems like an incredible bargain. You’ve changed my life, Lucifer. I really can’t thank you enough.”

“Well,” said Lucifer, “did you mean it when you offered me your virginity?”

Nicola nodded. “Yes, definitely,” she said.

“Good,” said Lucifer. “This is my stop, coming up next. I’d like you to come with me.”

“Okay!” said Nicola, her eyes widening a little.

At the next stop, therefore, they disembarked, and walked together down a street with terraced houses. Lucifer stopped outside number 66, and pulled out his keys.

Inside, a matronly middle-aged woman emerged from a doorway. “Home early, Mr Chapman!” she said. “Who’s this?”

“My niece, Nicola,” said Lucifer. “She’s an economics student. Nicola, this is Mrs Wade, my landlady.”

“Pleased to meet you,” said Nicola.

Mrs Wade stared suspiciously at Nicola’s t-shirt, where it was stretched across her large unfettered breasts. “Likewise, I’m sure,” she said, a little stiffly. “Pretty little thing, aren’t you?”

“Thank you!” said Nicola, beaming happily.

“Come on, Nicola,” said Lucifer with a chuckle. “My flat’s upstairs.” He led her up a short flight of stairs, and stopped outside a door marked 66B. Finding another key on his keyring, he slipped it into the lock.

Nicola stared at the number on the door. Part of the ‘B’ had been scrubbed out. “Look!” she said with a smirk. “666!”

Lucifer chuckled. “Someone’s idea of a joke,” he said. “I haven’t got around to fixing it.”

“You should leave it like that,” said Nicola in amusement. “It fits your name.” She followed him into the flat, and looked around. “You have a nice place.”

“Thank you,” said Lucifer. “Can I get you something to drink?”

Nicola suddenly found herself feeling very nervous. “Actually, can I take a shower?” she asked.

“Sure!” said Lucifer. “Bathroom’s through there. Just make sure the curtain’s inside the bath and pulled all the way across. You’ll find clean towels in the cupboard.”

“Okay,” said Nicola, nodding. “Thank you.” She disappeared into the bathroom, locking the door behind her.

Lucifer poured himself a drink, then he sat down with his phone, and began wading through emails.

Fifteen minutes later, Nicola emerged from the bathroom. She was dry, though her hair looked damp, and she was naked. “I’m ready,” she said, with a little tremor in her voice.

Lucifer got to his feet, picked up his briefcase, and sauntered over to her. “Bedroom’s right here,” he said, stepping past her and pushing a door open. “Why don’t you get comfy?”

“Um ... okay,” said Nicola. She walked in, climbed on to Lucifer’s queen-size bed, and lay down on her back, with her legs together and her arms by her sides.

Lucifer set his briefcase down next to the bed, then he casually took off his clothes, and climbed on top of her. “You sure about this?” he asked.

Nicola nodded. Then she bit her lip uncertainly. “What ... what should I do?

“Just spread your legs, and try to relax,” said Lucifer. “Would you like a drink? It would help to take the edge off your nerves.”

“No ... I’m okay,” said Nicola. “I...” But she fell silent as Lucifer placed his lips on hers and stuck his tongue into her mouth. He positioned the head of his cock at the opening of her vagina, and gradually began working it inside her. Insufficiently lubricated, she winced in pain.

He broke off from the kiss. “Sorry,” he said, “I should have stopped to pick up some lubricant. I do have some in my briefcase, but it has certain ... properties...” He spat into his hand, reached down, and rubbed his saliva around her vaginal entrance. A moment later, he was able to slide his full shaft inside her.

Nicola lay still, savouring the unfamiliar sensation of a man’s penis thrusting inside her. Her vagina was still smarting from the inadequately lubricated penetration, but the fucking itself felt ... nice.

After a minute or so, it still felt nice. A minute after that, she started to wonder if there was supposed to be more to the experience. “Should I be ... doing something?” she asked.

“No,” grunted Lucifer, still thrusting away. “Well ... you can moan if you like.”

But Nicola was not feeling aroused enough to moan. So she merely waited silently, and patiently.

Eventually Lucifer stopped thrusting, and looked down at her. “What’s wrong?” he asked. “You’re not enjoying this?”

“Oh I am,” she assured him. “It feels quite nice. I just ... I suppose I was expecting more...”

“More what?” he inquired. “More movement? More noise?”

“More ... pleasure,” she said. “I’ve always imagined sex to be this wonderful amazing pleasurable experience – you know, with orgasms and whatnot.”

Lucifer chuckled. “Well I’ll be the first to admit I’m not the greatest lover,” he said, “and we kind of skipped the foreplay. But it’s possible your vagina is not as sensitive to stimulation as it might be. And I do have a remedy for that. It’s a special kind of lubricant. Interested?”

“Yes please!” said Nicola. “Your products have served me very well so far!”

Lucifer pulled his cock out of her. “I had a feeling I might need something from here,” he said, reaching over the edge of the bed to grab his briefcase. He hauled it up on to the bed, popped it open, and pulled out a soft plastic tube. Opening it, he squirted out a liberal quantity of yellowish gel, which he smeared all over his erection.

“Won’t that affect you too?” asked Nicola.

Lucifer shook his head. “It only works on mucous membranes,” he said. “If it gets into the end of my cock, then yes, but a little extra sensitivity there won’t hurt.” He slid his penis back inside her.

After another minute of thrusting, Nicola was beginning to feel the effects of the gel. “Ohhh,” she gasped. “Now this is more like it...” The pleasurable sensations emanating from her vaginal walls were steadily increasing in intensity. “Oh God!!” She wrapped her legs around Lucifer’s back, and grabbed his shoulders with her hands. “Yes ... yes!! Fuck me, Lucifer!”

Then she shuddered and groaned, her whole body spasming in the most intense orgasm she had ever experienced. This was wild; that lubricant was dynamite!

Her enthusiastic response brought Lucifer close to his own climax. Then a thought occurred to him. “Are you on the pill?” he asked.

“No! Why would I be?” Nicola panted. “It’s okay though – I figured I’d just take a morning-after pill.”

“Better if you don’t have to,” said Lucifer, pulling out. “Can I come in your arse instead?”

“Um,” said Nicola, a little apprehensively. “I s’pose ... just make sure you’re well-lubed!”

“I only have the special stuff,” said Lucifer. “But I imagine there’s no harm in using it...” He thoroughly coated his cock with the sensitising lubricant, and pressed it against her anal sphincter as she pulled her knees up to her chest. “Try to relax your anus as much as you can,” he said.

After a moment’s resistance, his erection began to slide smoothly into her rectum. Nicola bit her lip, and tried not to tense up; the sensation was weird, but not unpleasant. Then she felt Lucifer beginning to thrust back and forth, and she closed her eyes.

The gel once again began to work its magic. A warm, delicious tingling sensation started to spread out from her rectum, suffusing her entire bottom. “Ohhh!” she gasped. “Ohhh God! This is good! So good!”

“You like it up the arse, eh?” inquired Lucifer, thrusting harder.

“I love it!” cried Nicola, tightly gripping his shoulders. “Fuck my arse! Fuck it hard!”

This was enough to send Lucifer over the top. He groaned as he emptied his testicles, pouring his semen deep inside her bowels. He stayed inside her until he began to wilt, at which point he withdrew, and cleaned his cock with a tissue.

“Well,” said Nicola, panting, “I’m no longer a virgin. And I think it’s safe to say that I love sex! Thank you, Lucifer.”

“You’re welcome,” said Lucifer. “Your vagina and rectum should now be permanently sensitive to sexual stimulation, but if you find the effect wearing off, you know how to find me.”

“Are you ... are you kicking me out now?” asked Nicola, a little sadly.

“Not at all!” said Lucifer. “But I think you’ve got everything you need from me. You can have your pick of boys your age now; you’re a bona fide catch. Surely you don’t want to continue hanging out with a man old enough to be your dad?”

“What if I do?” said Nicola. “I like you. You’ve given me beautiful skin, and big breasts, and guaranteed me a wonderful sex life... Why wouldn’t I want to stay with you?” Then a horrible thought struck her. “Are you ... married?”

Lucifer chuckled. “You think I’d be living in a bachelor pad like this if I were? No, I’m single. And if you want to be my girlfriend for a while ... well, I’d be honoured. I think you’ll get tired of me pretty quickly, but we’ll see how it goes.”

“Okay!” said Nicola happily. “So ... what would you like to do with the rest of the day?”

“Well, I think we should probably spend some time getting to know each other,” said Lucifer. “But not here. How about we take a walk to the park? We can take a blanket and some snacks, and just sit in the shade of a tree, and talk.”

“That sounds nice!” said Nicola. She sat up, then got up from the bed. “I’ll get my clothes; they’re still in the bathroom.”

“We should get you some new clothes,” said Lucifer. “To go with the new you.”

“Yes!” said Nicola brightly. “Something to show off my nice big breasts!”

“You know, your boobs aren’t your only good feature,” remarked Lucifer. “You have a very nice pair of legs there.”

“You think so?” said Nicola, smiling. “That’s nice to hear! So you want me to wear ... what ... shorter skirts?”

“Much shorter,” said Lucifer. “The ankle-length thing does you no favours at all.”

Nicola giggled. “I’m so used to hiding myself away, to avoid drawing attention to myself, because I was so ugly. It’ll be nice to let loose and show off some skin!”

Lucifer smiled. “That’s the spirit!” he said.

Nicola skipped into the bathroom, and put her clothes back on. When she emerged, she found Lucifer in his kitchen, putting some snacks together in a cool-bag. “Do you like grapes?” he asked.

“I love grapes!” said Nicola.

Lucifer fetched from his fridge a plastic bag containing a large bunch of grapes. Opening a drawer, he pulled out a pair of scissors, and snipped off a couple of small clusters. Then he looked Nicola up and down, grinned, and gave the air a couple of quick snips. “Maybe I should take these to that skirt of yours,” he said. “Turn it into a mini.”

Nicola’s eyes widened. “If you want,” she said. “Go ahead.”

Lucifer raised an eyebrow. “Seriously?” When Nicola nodded, he walked over to her, dropped to one knee, and took hold of her skirt at approximately mid-thigh level. Opening up the scissors, he began to close them on a fold of material. “You sure about this?”

“Yes,” Nicola confirmed.

Lucifer snipped the scissors, making a long cut in the skirt. Inserting one blade into the cut, he began cutting his way around the side of the skirt, then along the back, then around the other side, and finally across the front to his starting point. Since he had inadvertently been cutting higher and higher as he went, he had to cut downwards at forty-five degrees for the last few inches. The bottom half of the skirt dropped to the floor around Nicola’s ankles. “Well it’s not pretty,” said Lucifer, “but there you go. Is that okay? Or would you like it shorter?”

“You can make it as short as you like,” said Nicola bravely.

Lucifer laughed. “Don’t tempt me!” he said. “There’ll be nothing left of it.”

“Oh!” said Nicola, with a little gulp. “Well I suppose I meant ‘within reason’. I assumed you would stop short of exposing my bottom!”

“A dangerous assumption!” said Lucifer. “But now that I know where you draw the line, I shall proceed.” He snipped a slit up the back of the skirt, then cut a line around it, as perfectly horizontal as he could. This time he judged it a lot better, and when he reached the middle of the back again, he was able to make his final snip line up perfectly with the start of his cut. He smiled in satisfaction; Nicola’s bottom was only barely covered.

“God, that is short, isn’t it?” said Nicola anxiously, staring down at her bared thighs.

“Too short?” asked Lucifer. “We can figure something out...”

“No,” said Nicola quickly, “it’s fine. I want to do this.”

“Good!” said Lucifer. “Then let’s go.” He put the grapes into a Tupperware container, put the container into the cool-bag, and zipped up the cool-bag.

“Want me to carry something?” asked Nicola.

“Um ... oh! Yes please,” said Lucifer. “The drawer under my bed has some blankets in it. Could you grab one of those?”

Nicola nodded, and fetched a brown-and-green check-patterned blanket from the drawer in question. Then she followed him out of the flat, down the stairs, and out through the front door into the street.

Her tiny skirt caught plenty of eyes as they walked to the park, but nobody said anything. Once in the park and crossing recently-mown grass, they headed for a line of trees alongside the path that followed the canal. A narrowboat cruised by at a leisurely pace as they spread out the blanket and sat down. The park was not all that busy, but some teenaged boys were practising parkour moves nearby, and one or two of them took note of Nicola’s skirt with some interest as she knelt down with her back to them.

“So, Mr Chapman,” she said. “Cosmetics salesman, deflowerer of nineteen-year-old virgins, and son of Satanists ... tell me about yourself.”

Lucifer chuckled, and shrugged. “Well, I’ll give you the short version, and we can fill in some of the blanks later. I was born in Watford, raised in Surrey and Kent, and kind of rebelled against my determinedly free-spirited parents by working hard at school. I managed to get into Durham University, where I got a degree in anthropology. I had a girlfriend at the time, Katie ... she and I flirted with the idea of getting married, but it never happened.

“I got a job at my local Halford’s branch, and became a manager pretty quickly. Then I got a job at Homebase, where I stayed for about eight years, eventually becoming store manager. Then I became a store manager for Boots, which was a bit of a step backward but it allowed me to move to London. I started seeing this girl, Vicki ... I’d had some girlfriends back in Maidstone, nothing lasting more than a year or two, though ... but Vicki was different. She was clever, funny ... and gorgeous. I was besotted. I asked her to marry me, and to my surprise, she accepted. We were married for six years. Then ... there was a car accident.” He sighed.

“Oh my God!” said Nicola, shocked. “She ... died?”

“Not immediately,” said Lucifer. “She was on life support for five weeks. But then they told me she was braindead, and I had to let them pull the plug. It was petty brutal.” Then he shook himself. “Sorry – didn’t mean to get all depressing.”

“That’s so sad!” said Nicola. “I’m so sorry, Lucifer.” She reached over, and took his hand.

He smiled at her. “Anyway that’s enough about me. Your turn now.”

Nicola chuckled. “Well, I was born in Glasgow, and lived there with my two older brothers, Sean and Malcolm, until I was eight years old. My mum’s a vet, and my dad’s a GP; he took on a new practice in Derby, and so we all moved. I was happy enough there, until I got to high school; then I started getting picked on, and I became seriously withdrawn and depressed. Things got so bad ... well, I actually tried to commit suicide...”

“Good grief!” exclaimed Lucifer.

Nicola shrugged awkwardly. “I guess it was just a cry for help. I took pills. Lots of pills. But Mum found me and rushed me to hospital, and I was fine. But they took me out of school and got me a tutor, which was awesome – Kristina was a great teacher; she saw me through my A-levels. I was terrified about going off to Uni, but Uni’s nothing like school. I kept to myself, and people pretty much ignored me ... which was fine with me – I wanted to be ignored...”

“Will you continue to hide like that?” asked Lucifer with a smile. “Now that you have a face and body to be proud of?”

Nicola grinned. “No, I fully intend to show off a bit,” she said. “Although maybe not quite like this. I’m more interested in showing off my chest than my legs. I’ve always had legs ... but now I have a proper chest! I want to wear low-cut tops; I want to have a cleavage!”

Lucifer laughed. “And so you shall,” he said. “We can go shopping for tops after this, if you like.”

“Yes please!” said Nicola.

“But,” added Lucifer, “if I’m allowed any say in the matter at all, I’d love for you to wear miniskirts as well. You really do have the legs for it, and I have a particular fondness for very short skirts.”

Nicola smiled, and nodded. “We’ll get some miniskirts too,” she promised. “Perhaps not quite this short, though! It’s a little impractical.”

“Only if you’re concerned with trying to keep your panties hidden,” said Lucifer mischievously.

Nicola smirked. “You want me to let people see them, don’t you?”

Lucifer grinned. “You should try it,” he said. “You might enjoy it.” He looked past her, at the teenagers who had by now lost interest in gawping at Nicola, and had returned to attempting backflips off the tree trunk. “You could flash those lads,” he suggested.

Nicola shivered. “I don’t think I’m brave enough,” she said apologetically.

Lucifer shuffled closer to her. “Then let me help,” he said, leaning in for a kiss.

This kiss was gentle, tender, and electrifying. Closing her eyes, Nicola allowed Lucifer to pull her down on to the blanket with him, until she was lying on her side, facing him. He put his arm over her waist, and stroked the small of her back while he kissed her. Then he moved his hand down to her bottom, and began massaging her left buttock through her shortened skirt.

Nicola, breaking off from the kiss, whispered nervously, “Oh God ... what do you think they can see?”

“I can’t be totally certain,” Lucifer murmured, “but I suspect that each time I circle up towards your back, I’m exposing a little bit of your bottom ... and perhaps a hint of your panties.”

“Oh God,” said Nicola again. “It’s a little scary ... but also exciting. And I must say, I don’t think I’ve ever been happier.”

Lucifer smiled, and subtly tugged the fabric of her skirt upward a couple of inches. Then he slid his hand back down, and confirmed with the light touch of a finger that her panties were indeed peeping beneath the hem of her skirt.

“I felt that,” said Nicola in a low voice. “I’m feeling very exposed! Are the boys watching?”

Lucifer experimentally peeked over her ear with one eye. “Yup,” he said. “All five of them are staring at your panties now.” And he kissed her again, before she could whimper in anxiety.

But when she next paused to take a breath, Nicola whispered, “This is wild! I can’t believe you’re showing off my bottom to complete strangers!”

Lucifer chuckled. “I was a complete stranger to you, a couple of hours ago,” he reminded her.

“That’s different,” replied Nicola quietly. “You lavished gifts on me, turned my life around, made me a whole new person ... and I ... I have quite strong feelings for you as a result. Those lads behind us ... I don’t know them at all!”

“True,” acknowledged Lucifer, gently tugging her skirt up higher still. “They’ve done nothing to deserve the treat we’re giving them. So if you want to end the show, I won’t mind a bit; just reach back and pull your skirt down.”

Nicola hesitated. Then she said, “I don’t want to end the show. I want you to keep showing off my bottom and panties to those undeserving boys.”

“Good,” murmured Lucifer, grasping the hem of her skirt and slowly pulling it up until her entire panties were uncovered. “That’s my girl.”

Nicola pressed her forehead against his. “This is so wild!” she whispered. “I’d never have dreamed, when I got up this morning, that I’d be doing anything like this today! Although, I also never would have dreamed I’d be getting big boobs and losing my virginity! Showing off my panties seems almost ordinary, compared to everything else that’s happened.” She giggled. Then she moaned suddenly.

“Getting excited?” inquired Lucifer, smiling.

“Yes,” admitted Nicola, “but not for the reason you think. I mean, yes, knowing I’m being watched is quite exciting, but that’s not why I moaned. Ohhhh...”

“Then what?” asked Lucifer curiously. “Something’s obviously rubbing you up the right way.”

“It’s nothing,” said Nicola, blushing. “Are the boys still watching?”

Lucifer took another subtle look. “Not just watching,” he said. “They’ve got their phones out; they’re filming you.”

“Oh my God!” whispered Nicola, horrified. “What if they put it on the internet?”

“Then your bottom will be on the internet,” said Lucifer with a little shrug. “Along with millions of others. You think anyone you know will see the video, and know it’s you?”

Nicola considered this. “I suppose that’s highly unlikely,” she admitted. She shivered. “All right then, let them film my panties. Ohhhh ... oh my God...”

“Okay, what is going on?” asked Lucifer, bewildered.

Nicola’s cheeks reddened. “It’s ... a little embarrassing,” she said sheepishly.

“Tell me,” said Lucifer. “Please?”

Nicola pursed her lips. “It’s my ... rectum,” she said quietly. “It feels like there’s a big number two in there. It’s sort of pressing against the inside of my arsehole at the moment, trying to get out ... and I’m holding it in of course, so it’s shifting around ... maybe compressing, I don’t know ... but the thing is ... every time it shifts even slightly, it’s stroking my rectum in a really lovely way...”

Lucifer snorted with amusement. “Oh dear,” he said. “The lube! Of course – I should have realised. Talk about unintended consequences! Looks like every bowel movement you have from now on will be quite a pleasurable experience!”

Nicola closed her eyes, and moaned softly. “I suppose so!” she murmured. “Well, that won’t be too awful. But at the moment, it’s making me really want to do a poo! It’s very distracting.”

“So do a poo,” said Lucifer, with a naughty grin. “I won’t mind. And I’d love to see the looks on the faces of those lads behind you!”

Nicola’s eyes opened wide. “Are you serious?” she asked him. “Right here? And now? In my panties?”

Lucifer kissed her. “Only if you want to,” he said. “I think it would be kind of amazing ... but I can understand if it’s too much to ask.”

Nicola’s brow furrowed slightly in worry, and her eyes began to moisten. “It might be fun,” she whispered uncertainly, “and I really want to please you, Lucifer ... but I’m a little scared....”

“You know I’ll protect you, right?” said Lucifer, looking earnestly into her eyes. “You needn’t fear anything while I’m around. I won’t let anybody do anything bad to you.”

Nicola relaxed a little, and smiled. “Thank you,” she said. “That does help. But ... showing off my panties is one thing. I mean ... it’s sexy, isn’t it?”

“Very!” agreed Lucifer. “Supremely sexy.”

“But doing a poo in my panties,” Nicola continued uncomfortably, “that’s just ... humiliating. I’m not sure why you would ask me to do it ... why you would want me to embarrass myself like that... It makes me feel anxious and worried...”

Lucifer kissed her again. “I would find it intensely sexy,” he said. “And maybe those boys wouldn’t; maybe they’d be grossed out. But maybe they’d find it as arousing as I would. Who knows? But ... on the other hand, the last thing I want is for you to feel badly about yourself. If you did it, I’d want you to enjoy it, not feel humiliated. So forget it; it was a silly idea.”

Nicola bit her lip. “You really think it would be sexy for me to do a poo in my panties?”

“Oh my God yes,” said Lucifer. “But don’t worry about it. Maybe we can try it at home, where you’ll feel safer.”

“But,” said Nicola, “you’d find it extra sexy if I did it here, with people watching?”

“Yes,” Lucifer conceded, “but you shouldn’t let my little whims dictate your choices. I don’t want you to humiliate yourself just to satisfy a little fantasy of mine. In fact, I forbid you to do so.”

“Too late!” gasped Nicola, her eyes closing. “It’s coming out...”

“Good grief!” said Lucifer, astonished. “Seriously?”

“Yes!” whispered Nicola, delighting in the feeling of her warm, thick, soft poo slowly sliding through her anus, and setting her entire bottom, loins and lower back aflame with intense sexual pleasure. “This feels so wrong ... but so, so good! Oh my God, I love it; I love doing a poo in my panties!”

“Really?” Lucifer’s eyes were wide as he stared at her. He wished he could sit up and peer down at her panties, for a better view ... but that would spoil the experience for the teenage boys, and he did not want to do that. He wanted them to see everything. He sneaked another peek at them; they were now staring in utter shock and amazement ... but they were still filming.

“Ohhh!” moaned Nicola. “I can’t believe how good this feels...”

“It’s really that good?” asked Lucifer. He had certainly not anticipated this little side-effect of the lubricant, but it was quite impressive.

“Ohhh yes,” Nicola murmured. “It’s a pity I only have so much poo; I wish this would go on forever! It’s weird; I know that those boys are watching and filming me, but I don’t even care about that anymore. I just want to fill my panties with more and more poo, until I have a lovely climax... And still it comes ... wow, this is amazing ... I know I haven’t been for a couple of days, but even so, I’d have thought it would have stopped by now. I wonder...” She opened her eyes, as it occurred to her that Lucifer was being rather quiet.

He was nowhere to be seen. Alarmed, Nicola propped herself up on one elbow, and looked around. “Lucifer?” She could not see him anywhere. Where the hell had he gone? She turned further, and saw the five boys staring at her. Three of them lowered their phones nervously as she looked at them, but the other two kept filming. Meanwhile, her poo was continuing to flow, and her panties were getting fuller and fuller.

“Where did he go?” she demanded, getting awkwardly to her feet and pulling her skirt down as far as it would go.

“Your boyfriend?” asked one of the boys in amusement. He was still filming her, with a lecherous grin on his round face. “Sorry, I didn’t notice. I wasn’t really paying much attention to him, if I’m honest.”

“Didn’t any of you see him go?” asked Nicola in distress. She looked around desperately. “Lucifer! Lucifer!”

“Lucifer? What, like the Devil?” inquired the boy.

“Yes, but...” Nicola paused, and it occurred to her that her panties were beginning to slip down. “Oh God...” she clutched at their sides through her skirt. Poo was still coming out of her, at an undiminished rate. She tried to stop it, to pinch it off, but she could not; on it came, with the inexorability of an incoming tide. Reaching back with her hand, she could feel that her panties were already enormously full, and sagging down way beneath the hem of her ridiculously tiny skirt. “Ugh!” she exclaimed. “I have to find him!”

One of the boys had circled around behind her, and was now filming the back of her distended panties as they threatened to overflow. The others were staring at her with a mixture of lust and contempt. With a gasp of fear, Nicola turned and ran, heading for the road. Her overloaded panties bounced against her bottom, repeatedly slapping her buttocks with several pounds of fresh poo, while yet more poo was continuously emerging from her anus. A large chunk of poo was flung out of the left leg-hole of her panties, and then, a moment later, a slightly smaller chunk escaped from the right.

She ignored them. She had a nasty suspicion that this poo was not going to finish anytime soon, and that the cause of this phenomenon was not natural. She remembered only too clearly Lucifer cautioning her to be careful what she wished for ... yet, like an idiot, she had wished for her poo to go on forever! And in that instant, it seemed, he had vanished. Mission accomplished?

Had he really been the Devil? Nicola did not believe in Satan, but she was willing to be open-minded in the face of this kind of evidence. Perhaps he had gone back to Hell now ... or perhaps he had moved on to another unsuspecting victim. But she had to try to find him.

Gasps and exclamations followed her as she ran down the pavement, clutching the sides of her panties and dropping lumps of poo in her wake. Her large breasts bounced uncomfortably beneath her t-shirt. Then she spotted a policeman up ahead, and she panicked, ducking down a quiet side street, and quickly changing her plan. Her first priority right now was to find a place of refuge.

If only she had her phone! But it was in her bag, and her bag was in Lucifer’s flat. At least, that was where she had left it. But what if Lucifer’s flat had disappeared along with the man himself?

Panting hard, she came to a halt next to the first good hiding place she spotted: a couple of yew shrubs growing on the other side of a garden wall. They would conceal her very nicely. Looking around nervously, she could not see anybody except for some distant pedestrians, so she hopped over the wall, squeezed between the yew bushes, and crouched down, out of sight of the road.

At last she had a moment to pause, take a breath, and gather her thoughts. Her poo was still flowing out of her anus, as smoothly and steadily as ever, and it was coming out of her panties at roughly the same rate, only more intermittently, via both leg-holes. A couple of piles of poo began to grow on the ground beneath her.

This was a nightmare. Possibly literally, in which case she would shortly wake up in great relief. But it felt very real, and until she woke up, she had no choice but to proceed on the assumption that her life had in fact taken a nightmarish turn.

And yet ... a tentative manual examination of her face told her that her acne was still gone. And her breasts were as big and beautiful as she could have wished for. So things were not all bad. But the unstoppable poo meant that she had merely traded one barrier to social acceptance for another.

How was she going to handle this? She had heard of adult nappies, but she was fairly sure that none of them could hold even a minute’s worth of her constantly-flowing poo. Could she carry around a plastic bag with her wherever she went? Possibly, but its handles would break long before it was full. And then what? If she tried to empty it out into a toilet, she would block it up. This was not a sustainable solution.

Going to lectures, then, seemed out of the question, as did getting any kind of job. Even working from home would be impossible; she would fill her home with poo in no time. Basically, she was fucked.

She fought down her mounting sense of panic, as the piles of poo beneath her approached her bottom. Accepting the status quo was not an option. She had to fix this. She had to bring the flow of poo to a halt. First, she would try to find Lucifer. If he was not at his flat, she would wait for him to return. If his flat itself had magically disappeared, or if Mrs Wade somehow no longer remembered him, she would resort to Plan B: the hospital. Doctors would be baffled by her condition, but they would be scientifically curious enough to be driven to try to understand and fix it.

She took a deep breath, and slowly let it out. She felt better now that she had a plan. And now that she was no longer panicking, she began once again to enjoy the wonderfully pleasurable sensations resulting from the poo constantly stroking the newly sensitive interior of her rectum.

She scowled in annoyance. Her future, which had seemed so very rosy just a few minutes ago, now looked terribly bleak; she was not in the mood to get off on the very thing that had thrown her life into chaos.

And yet, it felt so good... If the dark cloud looming over her had a silver lining, perhaps this was it: continuous erotic stimulation. The enjoyment of this might well diminish once the novelty wore off, but until that time came ... was there really any harm in extracting what pleasure she could from it?

For it did indeed feel exceedingly good. Almost unconsciously, she reached between her legs and began to gently rub her clitoris through her panties. The piles of poo on the grass beneath her had now merged, and risen so high that her bulging panties were becoming embedded. Rocking forward on to her knees, Nicola closed her eyes and moaned slightly, rubbing her pussy more firmly.

This was very pleasant; a welcome distraction from her predicament. Once she had finished masturbating, she would have to figure out how to get to Lucifer’s flat without causing too much of a scene ... and that was stressful to think about. So she took her time, savouring the lovely sensations coming from her clitoris and rectum. With her free hand, she reached up underneath her t-shirt and began squeezing and stroking her right breast.

Now that she was leaning slightly forwards, some of the poo in her panties began to ooze forward along the gusset, sliding beneath her vaginal opening and then onward, into the front of her panties. Soon Nicola found that she was rubbing her clitoris not just through the thin fabric of her panties, but also through a thickening layer of poo. Surprisingly, this did nothing to diminish the pleasurable feeling.

Indeed, her climax came on quickly, and she moaned in ecstasy as her loins became beautifully electrified. Gasping, she sat back into her huge pile of poo, which squished and rose up around her hips and lower back, pushing her bunched-up skirt up around her waist.

Coming down from her orgasmic high, Nicola felt a knot forming in her stomach as reality settled in around her. The smell, the terrible smell of her poo was almost suffocating. And she was sitting in it! It was all around her bottom and upper thighs, it was pressing between her labia ... God, she had even rubbed it all over her clit. She shuddered, and almost retched, with disgust.

Hurriedly getting to her feet, she pulled her panties halfway down her thighs, and shook them out. The huge lump of poo in the back fell out through the left leg hole, thudding into the squished, misshapen pile of poo below. The panties were almost entirely brown now, both inside and out. She pulled them back up, where they caught the six-inch turd hanging from her anus. Now trapped in the back of her panties, the turd continued to grow, curling around, folding over, then piling up beneath her buttocks. She tugged her skirt as far as it would go, but her panties were already bulging down below the level of the skirt’s hem.

Nicola was aware that her panties were becoming fuller of poo with each second that passed, and she whimpered unhappily. Yet she could not ignore the very pleasant sensations produced by the poo sliding through her rectum and anus, and she shivered slightly. It was like a constant, pleasurable itch. Reaching back with her right hand, she cupped her bulging panties, them squished them against her anus, rubbing the poo and the messy fabric around. The resultant delicious tingling suggested that some of Lucifer’s special lube had been inadvertently applied to the skin surrounding her anus.

But this was not getting her anywhere. Pulling her panties to one side and shaking them out, she let them snap back into place, then she wiped her hand on the grass at her feet, and climbed back over the wall. With a deep breath, she resolved to run straight to Lucifer’s flat, and not let anything deflect her. Hopefully the policeman she spotted earlier had moved on by now...

She set off, walking quickly. By the time she reached the end of the street, her panties were already full again and bulging well into view. She broke into a run, noting in relief that the policeman was nowhere to be seen. Her bulging panties began bouncing this way and that, and descending under the weight of her poo, so that once again she had to grab the sides of her panties as she ran.

Chunks of poo started flying hither and thither, but she let neither these nor the shouts of pedestrians deter her, and in less than a minute she was on Lucifer’s street. With poo dropping from her panties and forming brown smears on the backs of her legs, she slowed to a walk. She was relieved to find number 66 still there; it had not magically disappeared along with its occupant. Hurrying up the garden path, she rang the doorbell, then waited anxiously as more and more poo spilled out of her overloaded panties.

The door opened, and there was Mrs Wade. She looked at Nicola in surprise, then stared at Nicola’s butchered skirt. “Hello!” she said. “Whatever happened to you?”

“Is Lucifer here?” asked Nicola desperately.

“I thought he was upstairs with you!” said Mrs Wade. “Ugh, what’s that smell?”

“It’s poo!” said Nicola. “It’s been coming out of me constantly for the last twenty minutes or so! I made a wish – a stupid, stupid wish – and it came true! And then Lucifer disappeared!”

“Oh good grief!” said Mrs Wade, aghast. “Well I don’t want you filling his flat with your poo; you’d better come right through to the back garden, and you can start filling a wheelbarrow or something while you wait for him to come back. Silly girl – didn’t he warn you not to make any wishes?”

“Well yes,” admitted Nicola, “but ... hey, you don’t seem very surprised! You know something about him, don’t you?”

“Hush!” said Mrs Wade. “I’ll explain in a moment. Just get yourself into the back garden as quick as poss.”

Nicola stepped inside, and trotted down the hall, into Mrs Wade’s kitchen, and out through the unlocked back door into the back garden. Only two chunks of poo fell out of her panties on the way; the larger one was about the size of a tennis ball. Mrs Wade, following behind Nicola, grimaced as she stepped over the splattered lumps, but she was thankful that at least they had fallen on the linoleum.

In the garden, where a long, narrow stretch of lawn was flanked by a flagstone path on one side and a flower bed on the other, Nicola quickly spotted a wheelbarrow next to the small shed at the far end. She made her way over to it, then stood awkwardly next to it, slightly straddling one corner so that her poo started to fall inside it.

“Good,” said Mrs Wade. “Yes, that’ll do.”

“So what do you know about Lucifer?” asked Nicola sternly. “Is he ... like ... really the Devil?”

“Goodness me, no!” said Mrs Wade. “I think he’d be living in fancier accommodation if he were, don’t you? No, he’s just a plain ordinary human, just like you and me ... despite his parents’ best efforts to make him otherwise.”

“I know they were Satanists,” said Nicola. “What did they do to him, exactly?”

“Well, they cast spells on him,” said Mrs Wade. “And on each other. Lots and lots of spells. Most of them didn’t work – the poor dears didn’t really know what they were doing – but a few of them worked. Not perhaps in the way they were supposed to, mind you, but they certainly produced results. One of those results was that he developed the ability to grant wishes. At least ... it’s not quite like that. It’s not a conscious thing. It’s more like, people who make a wish in his presence tend to find that wish coming true. There’s nothing he can do about it, one way or the other.”

“Well okay then!” said Nicola. “So I just need to find him, and wish for my poo to stop! But where is he?”

“Ah, well that’s the thing,” said Mrs Wade with a sigh. “His mum and dad thought it would be a good idea to have him disappear in a puff of smoke after granting someone’s wish. Unfortunately it doesn’t quite work like that. He has to go somewhere, doesn’t he? So it’s more of a teleportation than a vanishing.”

“Okay, so where does he teleport to?” asked Nicola. “And bear in mind I’m only taking you remotely seriously because there’s clearly something weird and supernatural going on. Having an impossibly lengthy poo dies open one’s mind to ideas beyond the purely scientific. Not that I was closed to such ideas before, exactly ... but seeing is believing!”

“I know exactly what you mean,” said Mrs Wade, nodding. “As for where he goes ... it varies. Regrettably his parents were not very specific. ‘A safe place nearby and out of sight’ was, I believe, how they termed it. But what does ‘safe’ mean, exactly? Or ‘nearby’, for that matter? One time he found himself teleporting fifty miles away!”

“Crumbs!” said Nicola. “Well I hope he’s a little closer than that! But fifty miles isn’t all that bad. He should still be back today.”

“Yes, that’s true,” agreed Mrs Wade.

“So how do you know all this, anyway?” asked Nicola curiously. “Did you make a wish too?”

Mrs Wade rolled her eyes, and chuckled. “Yes,” she said, “although I’m afraid I rather wasted my opportunity. I could have wished for peace in the Middle East, or an end to hunger, or gosh, even a million pounds would’ve been nice.”

“All good wishes,” agreed Nicola. “What did you wish for instead?”

Mrs Wade sighed. “I said, ‘Oh look, it’s raining – I wish I’d remembered to bring the sheets in.’“

Nicola stared at her. “Bummer,” she said. “Still, not as bad as my wish. At least yours didn’t have permanent negative consequences.”

“There is that,” conceded Mrs Wade.

“But why on Earth didn’t he warn me?” demanded Nicola. “I mean, he did, kind of ... but only in a vague sort of way. Why didn’t he tell me, ‘Don’t wish for anything unless you really mean it, because I have the power to make wishes come true’?”

“Experience,” said Mrs Wade. “There’s a little thing called the Law of Unintended Consequences, and it never applies so much as when people make wishes. Lucifer’s not sure exactly how much power lies in his wish-granting ability, but he’s terribly afraid of universe-altering wished. Things like ‘I wish everybody could just get along’ seem innocent enough, but just think what would need to happen in order to accomplish that. Would human nature itself have to change? Or how about ‘I wish global warming would stop’? Would the laws of physics suddenly change as a result of that?”

“I hadn’t really thought about it like that,” Nicola admitted.

“Experience has taught him,” continued Mrs Wade, “that when people know they can have a wish granted, they wish for something really big – and this potentially very dangerous. When they don’t know about his wish-granting ability, they typically waste it on something mundane – and therefore fairly safe.”

“They might not, though!” said Nicola. “What if someone said ‘Oh I wish the sun wasn’t so hot today”, or “I wish conservatives would all just die”? Things you’d never say if you thought they might actually happen.”

“I suppose that’s plausible,” said Mrs Wade nervously. “But what can he do? He’s stuck between a rock and a hard place.”

“I don’t know,” Nicola admitted. She felt something brush past her calf, and realised that her poo had piled up so high in the corner of the wheelbarrow that it was starting to spill over the edge.

“There you are!” said Lucifer in relief, stepping out of the house into the garden. “I was hoping you might have made it back here.”

“Oh thank Christ!” exclaimed Nicola in relief. “Lucifer, I’m pooing endlessly! I wish you’d told me about the wishes... Oh!” She gasped, suddenly realising that she’d made another accidental wish.

Lucifer sighed. “I was afraid of this,” he said. “I heard your wish and I thought, ‘Uh-oh!’ And then suddenly I was in the back of a Transit van. I’m glad you didn’t get arrested or anything.”

“Can I make another wish?” asked Nicola desperately. “Reverse my first one?”

“No, I’m afraid not,” said Lucifer apologetically. “You only get one. Also, though I haven’t tested it extensively, I’m pretty sure no wish can counteract another wish. Otherwise wishes would be pretty useless. What’s the point in having a wish granted, if someone else can come along and cancel it? No, I’m afraid you’re stuck with your endless poo, Nicola. I’m sorry.”

“Oh my God!” cried Nicola. “But I can’t be! I just can’t!”

Lucifer came over to her, and placed his hands on her shoulders. “I won’t just abandon you to your fate,” he said. “That’s a promise. I’ll do whatever I can to help you mitigate the problem, or at least manage it. If you no longer want me as a boyfriend, I’ll completely understand, but regardless, I’ll be the best friend to you that I can be. I’ll help you as much as I can.”

It was a lifeline, and Nicola clutched it. “You’ll still be my boyfriend?” she asked hopefully. “Even if I’m constantly defecating?”

“Absolutely,” he said firmly. “If you’ll have me.”

“Good heavens, Lucifer, she’s far too young for you!” said Mrs Wade, appalled.

“She’s a grown-up,” said Lucifer defensively. “She’s old enough to make her own choices.”

“Please don’t judge, Mrs Wade,” said Nicola quickly. “Lucifer did some wonderful things for me before ... the wish. You wouldn’t believe what I looked like before! I was ugly, flat-chested...”

“Ah,” said Mrs Wade, nodding in understanding. “The cosmetics. Well I needn’t tell you how those came about!”

“My boss, last year, was struggling to get his business off the ground,” Lucifer explained. “He made a wish, and suddenly his products were working exactly the way he wanted them to. He still has no idea how it happened. But anyway, the point is ... we need to proceed on the assumption that we’re not going to be able to stop your poo. We need to figure out how you can live and enjoy a decent quality of life despite it.”

“But how?” asked Nicola despairingly. “I won’t be able to go out in public!”

“We’ll figure it out together, okay?” said Lucifer.

Nicola wiped tears away with the back of her hand, and nodded. Despair was pointless, and she did not want to push away her only lifeline. “Thank you Lucifer,” she said in a small voice.

“Now, the first thing to do,” said Lucifer, “is to measure the rate of flow. Everything we do is going to be affected by that, and we need to plan accordingly. Our first priority is to figure out options for disposal, and we need to know how much we’re going to need to dispose of, and how often.”

This seemed like a very practical first step, and Nicola was impressed. She began to feel a little more hopeful. “How do you want to do that?” she asked.

Lucifer thought for a moment, then he clicked his fingers. “I’ll be right back,” he said, and he trotted back into the house.

When he returned, he was carrying a bucket and a bathroom scale. “Hey, that’s my mopping bucket!” said Mrs Wade. “I hope you’re planning to clean it afterwards!”

“Some perspective please, Mrs Wade!” said Lucifer painedly. “I suspect lots of things will need cleaning before we’re done.” He set the scale down on a flagstone, then he placed the bucket on the ground next to Nicola, and pulled out his phone. “Now, Nicola,” he said, “um, okay. I want to be accurate here, so bear with me. First I think you should shake the poo out of your panties, then pull them up and start pooing in them. At that point, squat over the bucket, and when I say ‘Go!’, pull your panties down at the back so the waistband scrapes past your arsehole. I’ll start my stopwatch, and when I stay ‘Stop!’, I want you to pull your panties back up, again scraping them across your arsehole so that whatever has already come out of you goes into the bucket. Does that make sense?”

Nicola grimaced, but nodded. With a nervous glance at Mrs Wade, who was looking rather queasy, she pulled her panties down to below her buttocks, and shook them hard so that all of the poo inside came out. Then she pulled them up again, and immediately they started to refill with more poo. Nicola squatted over the bucket, and grasped the sides of her panties.

“Go!” said Lucifer, and as Nicola pulled her panties down, the waistband slicing through her newly-emerging poo, Lucifer started his stopwatch. Nicola’s poo began descending into the bucket, hanging down in a lengthening rope, then breaking off and dropping down with a thud, then repeating, over and over again.

After a couple of minutes, Nicola was getting tired of squatting, so she changed position slightly, while keeping her bottom over the bucket. Her poo was piling up higher and higher, now completely covering the bottom of the bucket to a depth of an inch or so at the edges, and almost a foot in the middle.

“It’ll take ages to fill the bucket!” said Nicola. “Does it need to be full? I only ask because my legs are getting tired, and I’m beginning to attract a lot of flies!”

It was true: dozens of flies, attracted by the smell of poo, were swarming around her bottom and around the piles of poo on the ground and in the bucket. “Ugh,” said Mrs Wade. “And they’ll be laying their eggs in it. We need to get all this poo out of my garden!”

“Patience, please!” said Lucifer. “We don’t need the bucket to be full. But for accuracy, we do need a decent amount. I think five minutes should be sufficient.”

Nicola sighed, and nodded. “All right,” she said. “Just give me a ten second warning or something.”

“Okay,” said Lucifer. At four minutes and fifty seconds, he announced, “Ten seconds to go. Get ready to pull your panties back up.”

Nicola gripped the sides of her panties, and at Lucifer’s “Stop!”, she swiped the waistband back across her anus, cutting off the dangling poo and sending it dropping into the bucket. Her newly emerging turd began piling up on top of the poo already in her panties. Quickly, she stepped over to the wheelbarrow, turned around, and squatted slightly over a different corner of it.

Lucifer picked up the bucket with both hands – with a little grunt of effort, since it was now rather heavy – and shook it from side to side in an attempt to level the lumpy mound of poo inside. “About six inches deep, I’d estimate,” he said. “Maybe ten kilos or so? Let’s see...”

He placed the bucket on the scale, and read the display. “11.7 kilos,” he said. “Almost two stone! Okay, now let’s do some calculations...” He plugged some numbers into his phone. A moment later, he muttered, “A hundred and forty kilos an hour ... good grief, during an eight-hour sleep you’ll be producing over a tonne! About 3.4 tonnes per day ... this is going to be quite the disposal challenge!”

“You need to find someone who hasn’t made a wish yet,” said Mrs Wade.

Lucifer frowned. “You know what happens, Mrs Wade,” he said. “Give someone the opportunity to make a wish; they’re not going to use it to help someone else.”

“They might!” said Nicola eagerly. “It’s worth a try, surely?”

Lucifer shook his head slowly, then shrugged. “Do you have someone in mind? Someone who will give up the chance of improving their own life with a fulfilled wish, in order to fix your poo problem? Who do you know that loves you enough, that is so selfless, to do that for you?”

Nicola’s face fell. She barely knew anyone at the university; she had assiduously avoided human contact. Her parents might conceivably help ... but she would have to face them first, and while she had been looking forward to showing them her newly pretty face, she was sure they would be a little shocked at her big breasts. And if she was defecating all over the place as well ... they might slam the door in her face! Besides, even if she managed to explain her predicament, her father would most likely use his wish to cure one of his patients; she knew for a fact that he knew a little boy with leukaemia. Her mother would probably use her wish to cure a sick dog or cat.

That left her brothers. Sean was a selfish bastard; there would be no point asking him. Malcolm might help her ... but he was currently backpacking across Africa. It would take him days to get here, even if she could reach him.

Then her eyes lit up. “Drew!” she said suddenly. “He’s a lad in my hall of residence – I don’t really know him that well, but I know he’s really kind. He told off a couple of girls who were teasing me, and he always has a nice smile for me.”

“Okay...” said Lucifer dubiously. “What makes you think you’ll be his first priority when it comes to wish-making?”

“He’s a good lad!” said Nicola. “Let’s give him a chance, at least.”

“Yes, please do!” said Mrs Wade. “The mess is getting worse and worse!”

“Do you have this chap’s phone number?” Lucifer asked.

“No,” Nicola admitted. “I don’t even know what room he’s in. But I do know which floor he’s on, at least.”

“That’s a start,” said Lucifer, “but this is sounding like a really, really long shot. I’d still like to figure out a practical solution that doesn’t involve wishes.”

“And what on Earth would that be?” inquired Mrs Wade sceptically. “How are you going to shift a tonne of faeces every day without employing a full-time staff of porters with buckets following the poor girl around? Not to mention acquiring a vehicle and a driver and a location where you can dump the stuff without getting into trouble?”

“Very good questions,” conceded Lucifer. “And I suppose I’m unlikely to solve them in the next few hours. I have some thoughts along the lines of some kind of fertiliser-manufacturing facility, with Nicola providing the raw material ... but that of course would take time to organise and set up. In the meantime, Nicola’s still producing poo. All right, let’s go and see this Drew fellow.”

“Okay!” said Nicola, shivering nervously at the thought of meeting her secret crush like this. What would he think of her face? Her breasts? It was exciting to think that he might be attracted to her now. But then ... there was also the poo. He would almost certainly be disgusted. How maddening! To have become so attractive, and then so repulsive, in just one day ... it was almost unbearable. And yet, perhaps it did not matter all that much if Drew did not find her attractive; after all, she had a boyfriend now.

“Now,” said Lucifer, “I think we’ll take some bin bags with us. They should be strong enough to hold about five minutes’ worth of poo each. Maybe ten, but I’d hate to have one burst on us. We’ll play it by ear. Can you please lend us a few, Mrs Wade? I think I’m almost out upstairs.”

“Certainly,” said Mrs Wade. “I believe I have a full roll in the cupboard. I’ll fetch it.” She hurried back into the house, and reappeared a minute later with an unopened roll of bin bags. “Here you go.”

“Thank you,” said Lucifer. He tore off the seal, then he unrolled the first bag, and tore it off. Opening it up, he said, “Okay Nicola, can you hold the open end of this bag around your panties?”

“Awkward, but I suppose so,” said Nicola. “It would be better if we could fix it in place somehow...”

“It would,” said Lucifer, “but this is just a temporary solution. Can you manage?”

“Yes, I’m sure I can,” said Nicola. “What’s the plan?”

“Well, my car’s still being fixed,” said Lucifer. “Mrs Wade, could we please borrow yours?”

“Ugh, the smell will never come out of the upholstery!” complained Mrs Wade. “But yes, all right – just keep the windows open!”

“We will,” Lucifer promised.

Nicola had by now stuck her full panties and her bottom into the open end of the bin bag. She had to squat a bit, in order to ensure that the leading edge remained in front of the poo spilling out of her panties. “This is so undignified,” she muttered. She heard a couple of soft thuds, as chunks of her poo dropped down into the bottom of the bag.

“All right, let’s go!” said Lucifer. “Your keys please, Mrs Wade?”

His landlady sighed. “On the breakfast table,” she said. “Good luck to you both.”

“Thank you!” said Nicola, as she waddled after Lucifer back to the house. He led her through the kitchen and the hall to the front door, then outside and down the garden path to the gate. Parked on the street was Mrs Wade’s Vauxhall Viva. Once Lucifer had unlocked it, Nicola climbed carefully into the passenger side, tugging the front of the bin bag between her legs, then pulling the sides and back up around her bottom, up to her hips. She sat down, and her poo squished and squelched around her buttocks and pussy. She shivered a little, then noticed that despite the fact that she was sitting up straight with her anus almost pressed against her panties by the seat beneath her, her poo was continuing to flow out of her, its rate unchecked. It was simply squishing out forwards and backwards, surging forward in a thin layer beneath her pussy and forcing its way up her buttock cleavage at the back. It felt ... quite nice!

“Oh!” she said suddenly. “My bag! Could you please grab it from your flat?”

“Sure,” said Lucifer. He ran back to the front door, re-entered the house, and returned less than a minute later with Nicola’s handbag. “Here you go,” he said, handing it to her as he got into the driver’s seat.

The drive to Nicola’s hall of residence took about twenty minutes. During the journey, with kilo after kilo of poo piling up beneath her bottom at a steady rate, she would gradually lift herself higher and higher off the seat, then, after five minutes or so, she would carefully manoeuvre another empty bag underneath her, and start filling that. By the time Lucifer parked the car, she had got through three bags and was well on the way to filling a fourth.

“We should exchange phone numbers,” said Lucifer. “Remember I’ll teleport off somewhere as soon as Drew makes his wish. It would be nice to be able to call you afterwards.”

“Of course!” said Nicola, and they exchanged contact details. Afterwards, she ticked her phone back into her handbag, which she slung over her shoulder.

Lucifer helped her out of the car. “Okay, I’ve got the rest of the bags here,” he said. “Let’s go and see this friend of yours as quickly as possible.”

“I should change bags first,” said Nicola. “This one’s getting pretty heavy.”

“Okay,” said Lucifer. “I’ll help.”

“Also,” said Nicola anxiously, “if possible I’d really like to make it to Drew’s room without holding a bin bag around my panties. I’d like to seem as normal as possible! So I’ll empty my panties completely, and then we’ll run in. Okay?”

“All right,” said Lucifer dubiously. “You know you’re producing over five pounds – over two kilos – of poo every minute, right? Even if it only takes you two minutes to get to his room, that’s still about four and a half kilos of poo. Your panties won’t hold all of that, I’m guessing.”

“Then I’ll have to try and make it in just one minute,” said Nicola. “Ready?”

“Yup,” said Lucifer, taking hold of the bag.

Nicola let go of the bag, then she quickly pulled her panties down at the back, and shook them so that the colossal mound of poo therein fell into the bin bag. She hoisted her panties back up, and pulled down her skirt, which for pragmatic reasons had been bunched up around her waist. “Okay let’s go!” She took off towards the front door of the building at a run, her breasts bouncing wildly beneath her t-shirt.

Lucifer hastily tied a knot in the top of the bin bag, then he hefted it into the car, closed the door, and ran after Nicola. Inside, he heard her bounding up the stairs; apparently she had decided against waiting for the lift, which according to the display was on the eighth floor. Taking the stairs two at a time, he soon caught up with Nicola; he could not resist taking an upward glance at her panties, which were already looking very full and bulging far below her tiny skirt. He tore off another bag and shook it open; it would be needed only too soon.

Drew’s room was on the fifth floor, which, as luck would have it, was empty when they arrived. This was a relief, but not actually ideal; it meant Nicola would have to start knocking on doors. She turned to Lucifer. “I need to empty my panties,” she whispered.

Lucifer held the bag open, and Nicola tugged her skirt up, then lowered the back of her hugely-bulging panties. Seven or eight pounds of poo tumbled into the bag, and Nicola pulled her panties back up. They were brown, filthy, smelly and sticky, but that was the least of her worries right now. Fixing her skirt, she took a deep breath, and knocked on the first door. There was no answer.

She tried the next door. This one opened almost immediately, and a wild-haired, freckle-faced boy peered out. When he saw Nicola, his eyes lit up. “Whoa!” he said, staring at her chest. Then he looked up at her face with a cheeky grin. “Hello!” he said. “My name’s Ewan, and I’m ever so glad to meet you! What can I do for you?”

Nicola grinned, momentarily disarmed. “Hi Ewan, I’m Nicola,” she said. “I’m actually looking for Drew, though. Can you tell me which room he’s in?”

Ewan’s nose was wrinkling. “He’s in 513,” he said, looking a little disappointed. “Right behind you. What’s that smell? Is that ... you?”

Nicola’s cheeks reddened. “Thanks,” she said. She turned and went over to the door marked 513. As she knocked, Lucifer interposed himself between Ewan and Nicola.

“Nothing to see here, mate,” he said.

But Ewan craned his neck to look past Lucifer. “Whoa!” he exclaimed, seeing Nicola’s panty-bulge sagging into view ... and growing by the second. “She’s taking a dump in her panties!”

Nicola whipped around, mortified. “Sorry!” she said desperately. “I really can’t help it!”

“No need to apologise!” said Ewan, with a broad grin. “That’s the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen! You go girl!”

“Really?” inquired Nicola suspiciously. “Are you making fun of me?”

“No! God’s truth!” said Ewan earnestly. “The sight of your panties filling up, hanging down below that amazing skirt ... God! I’ve honestly never been so aroused!”

“I know, right?” said Lucifer with a chuckle. “I’m glad I’m not the only one who thinks it’s highly erotic.”

Ewan looked at him oddly. “Well, yeah,” he said. “It’s fantastic!”

Nicola smiled awkwardly. “Well I’m glad you approve,” she said, “but it’s actually a big problem. You see ... I can’t stop it. It just keeps coming and coming ... it’s endless!”

“That’s why I have this bag,” said Lucifer, holding up the bin bag.

Ewan’s brow furrowed. “Are you having a laugh?” he asked. “That’s not even possible.”

“Show him, Nicola,” said Lucifer.

Nicola’s eyes widened, but she hesitated only for a moment. Then she turned around. Her panties were now bulging obscenely, and starting to slip downwards.

“We were hoping Drew might be willing to help her,” said Lucifer, “but he appears to be out.”

“He’s probably out with Denise – his girlfriend,” said Ewan. “Are you seriously ... just, like ... doing one continuous poo?”

Nicola shrugged sheepishly as she turned back around. “It just keeps coming out.”

“Well, what did you need Drew for?” asked Ewan. “Could I maybe help instead?”

“I was hoping you might say that!” said Lucifer. “Perhaps you can. May we come in? We’ll bag up all the poo, I assure you.”

“Yes!” said Ewan. “Sure! Come on in!”

“I need to empty my panties first though,” said Nicola. “Bag please?”

“Can I see?” asked Ewan eagerly.

Lucifer shrugged, and looked at Nicola. “If we want him to help us...”

Nicola bit her lip, and nodded. “All right,” she said. She turned, hiking up her skirt. As Lucifer opened up the bag and positioned it beneath her bottom, she pulled down the back of her panties.

Ewan gasped at the huge misshapen lump of poo that fell out. He also caught a glimpse of the new turd currently emerging from Nicola’s anus. “That’s incredible!” he exclaimed. “Wow! I mean ... I’m sorry you’re in this predicament ... but it’s a really erotic predicament!”

Nicola pulled her panties back up, then tugged her skirt down. “Will you help me fix it though?” she asked.

“I’ll do anything I can,” said Ewan. “Though I’m not sure what you’re hoping I’ll be able to do. Anyway, come in.” He led them into his room.

Nicola entered, followed by Lucifer, dragging the bin bag. The room was small, but contained a long desk and chair by the window, a bed, a threadbare armchair, a built-in wardrobe, and a sink with a mirror and a counter area.

“So, what brings you to Palmerston Hall?” asked Ewan. “And how do you know Drew?”

“I live here!” said Nicola, slightly amused. “At least, I’m in Disraeli.”

“How come I haven’t seen you around?” asked Ewan, bewildered. “I think I’d have remembered you!”

Nicola grinned. “I’ve had a makeover,” she said. “You wouldn’t have noticed me before. I’ve seen you around lots of times though.”

Ewan stared at her face. Then his jaw dropped in shock. “No!” he said. “It can’t be! You’re not THAT Nicola, surely?”

“Pizza face?” inquired Nicola, wincing slightly. The name still hurt, even now.

“I never called you that,” said Ewan. “But ... how is this possible? And the boobs! You got implants?”

“Not implants,” said Nicola. “They’re real. Though ... unconventionally acquired. Lucifer here has some wonderful cosmetics...”

“The transformation is incredible!” exclaimed Ewan. “You’re ... beautiful!”

Nicola blushed, and smiled. “You really think so?”

“Absolutely!” said Ewan. “Oh my God, yes!” Then he turned to Lucifer. “Wait ... your name is Lucifer?”

“Yes,” said Lucifer, with a sigh. “Like the Devil. My parents were Satanists ... but I’m not. Can we move on?”

“Sure!” said Ewan with a shrug. “So you’re Nicola’s ... friend...?”

“He’s my boyfriend,” Nicola corrected him. “As of today! It was his cosmetics that changed my look.”

“Oh,” said Ewan, looking disappointed.

“Lucifer, I need the bag again,” said Nicola.

“Better start a fresh one,” said Lucifer, ripping off another bag. He held it open as Nicola emptied her panties into it.

“So,” said Ewan, watching in fascination, “how did this poo thing start?”

Nicola glanced at Lucifer, who hesitated, then nodded. “I made a stupid wish,” she said. “It wasn’t a serious wish, but it was the words that mattered, and the circumstances were such that ... well ... it came true.”

“Yikes!” said Ewan. “So, like, ‘This poo feels so good, I wish it would last forever!’ That kind of thing?”

“More or less, yes,” said Nicola, a little taken aback at how close to the mark Ewan was. “The thing is ... under these circumstances, a person only gets one wish. So I can’t do anything about it. I need someone else to make a wish for me. Someone kind, who won’t jump at the opportunity to get something for himself, but will use his wish to help me instead.”

“Wow,” said Ewan, running a hand through his mop of hair. “So I could wish for anything at all?”

“Perhaps this was a bad idea,” said Lucifer, getting to his feet.

“No!” said Ewan. “Wait. I’ll do it. It’s just ... having a chance to make a wish ... you know?”

“I know,” said Lucifer. “It’s got to be very tempting to use it for yourself. But there’s a young lady here who has a very urgent and potentially life-shattering condition that can only be solved one way. The question is, will you do the right thing?”

“Yes,” said Ewan. “I will. I just wish...”

“No no no!” cried Nicola and Lucifer at once.

Ewan was shocked into silence. “Jeez!” he said, after a lengthy pause. “These things can just slip out, can’t they? So you mean that the first thing I say that starts that way ... will come true?”

“Yes,” said Lucifer grimly. “So please, choose your words very carefully.”

“Okay,” said Ewan.

“Bag please, Lucifer?” said Nicola.

Lucifer once again held the bag open so Nicola could empty out her panties.

“What am I wishing for, then?” asked Ewan. “What words should I use?”

“That’s a good question,” said Lucifer. “I’ve given it a lot of thought. The thing is, a wish can’t be cancelled out or even altered by another wish. Nicola’s wish stands in perpetuity. She’ll keep on defecating forever; there’s no way to change that. What we need you to do is wish for an effective means of disposal; in other words, to make her poo vanish once it’s out of her.”

“Yes!” said Nicola. “That would be ideal.”

“Seems a shame,” said Ewan ruefully. “The sight, the whole concept of you constantly filling your panties with poo is so incredibly sexy.”

“I’m inclined to agree,” said Lucifer, “but obviously...” Then he furrowed his brow. “Wait ... Nicola, do you remember the exact wording of your wish?”

“Um,” said Nicola thoughtfully, “let’s see... I think it was something like, ‘I wish this could go on forever’.”

Lucifer nodded. “Yes, that sounds about right. I think maybe you said ‘would’ instead of ‘could’ ... but that wording does support a suspicion of mine: that the universe is able to fulfil the intent of the wish, if the wording is unclear. The word ‘this’, after all, could have meant anything. The question then becomes, what exactly did you mean by ‘this’? It’s important we figure that out, so that we don’t accidentally contradict your wish.”

Nicola shrugged. “I don’t think that’s a great mystery. I meant I wanted my poo to keep flowing.”

“May I ask why you wished that?” Ewan inquired curiously.

Nicola chuckled, blushing in embarrassment. “Because it felt ... well, feels ... lovely. One of Lucifer’s products had that effect – it turned my rectum and arsehole into major erogenous zones.”

“Oh!” said Ewan. “So the constant pooing is making you ... horny?”

Nicola shivered. “Very,” she said. “It’s hard to ignore!”

“Still, silver lining and all,” said Ewan. “At least you’re getting some enjoyment out of it.”

“It does feel nice,” conceded Nicola. “Bag please, Lucifer.”

Lucifer tore off a new bag, shook it open, and held it while Nicola once again shook her panties out. “But all this,” she continued with a sigh, “the rest of it – the smell, the constantly messy panties, the massive volumes of poo to deal with – that’s not so much fun.”

Ewan chuckled. “I wish all women had the same problem as you,” he said. “And then it wouldn’t be as... Oh!”

Lucifer had vanished, leaving behind a little wisp of smoke that quickly dissipated.

“What have you done?” exclaimed Nicola, aghast.

“Oh my God!” said Ewan. “I didn’t mean to ... oh no! Do you think...”

“Yes!” said Nicola. “Probably every woman in the entire world just started doing an endless poo!”

Ewan grabbed his hair with both hands. “Oh, I’m so stupid!” he exclaimed. “I’m so sorry, Nicola! All I wanted to do was help you ... and I blew it!”

But Nicola was thinking quickly. “Actually,” she said slowly, “maybe this isn’t such a bad solution. Now nothing will set me apart from any other woman. My endless poo production won’t make me a freak, because every other woman will be in the same boat. And the government will HAVE to come up with a disposal solution, for all of us!” She smiled happily. “Thanks Ewan! I think you just made exactly the right wish!”

Distant, muffled shouts could now be heard. “I think all hell’s about to break loose,” muttered Ewan. “Where the heck did Lucifer go?”

“Somewhere safe ... and hopefully nearby!” said Nicola. “Oh ... that’ll be him.” Her phone was buzzing; she quickly reached into her handbag and pulled it out. “Lucifer! Oh, you are? Good. See you shortly then.” As she tucked her phone back into he bag, she said, “He’s downstairs; he materialised in a storeroom or something.”

“Okay, good,” said Ewan. “But why did he vanish in the first place?”

“It’s just part of the package,” said Nicola. “Too hard to explain right now. Could you please hold that bag open? I need to dump out my poo again.”

“Sure,” said Ewan.

One floor above them, two minutes earlier, Abby Litton had been lying on her bed, reading a book, when a poo had suddenly begun erupting from her anus. She gasped in panic, and tried to clench her anus shut, but it was no good; the poo kept coming. “What the heck?” she muttered anxiously. As her thick turd began curling up in her panties, nestling against her buttocks, she jumped up from her bed, slipped her feet into her slippers, and ran for her door. Flinging it open, she stepped out into the corridor, almost colliding with another girl, Sandy, who was running towards the bathroom in just a tank top and panties. As Abby ran after her, she noticed that Sandy’s panties were bulging at the back. It looked as if Sandy had crapped her panties too; what a coincidence!

As she entered the bathroom, her poo was still coming out. Thanks to her tight capris, it had spread up and down her buttock cleavage, forward along her gusset, and sideways at the base of her buttocks. It was already spreading beyond the edges of her panties.

Both stalls were occupied. Sandy was practically beside herself; the bulge in her panties had grown, and seemed to be still growing. “Hurry up in there!” she shrieked frantically. “I’m having an accident out here!”

“You’re not the only one!” snapped Abby, who could feel her poo starting to creep down both legs of her capris, and forward into the front of her panties. Once again she tried to stem the flow, but there was no stopping it.

“I’m not finished!” exclaimed a voice from the second stall that Abby recognised as belonging to Tanesha, from room 601. “I can’t finish! It won’t stop coming out!”

“Same here!” said the girl in the first stall; it sounded like Macy, from 602. “Mine started the same time as Tanesha’s! There’s something fucked up going on here!”

“Well it has to stop sometime, right?” said Sandy desperately.

“Let’s hope so!” replied Tanesha.

Several more seconds passed. Sandy whimpered, as her panties became fuller and fuller. “Either of you stopping yet?” she asked.

“Nope!” said Tanesha.

“No!” said Macy.

With a sinking feeling, Abby started to consider the possibility that all four of them could be defecating for a long time. She had to find a toilet of her own! If not on this floor, then...

Hurrying out of the bathroom, she ran for the stairwell. Briefly weighing her options, she decided to try heading upstairs. The floors alternated by gender, so the seventh was a boys’ floor. But right now, Abby did not care. If it had a free toilet, she was taking it.

She burst through the fire door and ran straight to the bathroom. But inside, she once again found two occupied stalls. Another girl, looking distraught as she clutched the bulging back of a pair of tight jeans, was waiting outside, while a bewildered-looking boy talked to his girlfriend through the door of the first stall.

“What do you mean, it won’t stop?” he was demanding. “You’ve only got so much room in your intestines, Trisha!”

Abby backed out of the bathroom, and ran back to the stairwell, almost colliding with Sandy, who had just climbed up from the floor below. “No luck?” Sandy asked.

“Nope,” said Abby, hurrying up the stairs ahead of Sandy. She could feel poo rising around her buttocks, and squelching between her labia. It was a disgusting sensation, and the smell was awful; she nearly retched.

The stalls in the bathroom on the eighth floor, another women’s floor, were both of course occupied. If there had been a queue, it had likely already migrated to the ninth floor bathroom, whose stalls were also occupied.

“What are we going to do?” wailed Sandy, as they descended in the lift. “Try Disraeli?” A chunk of poo fell out of her panties and splatted on the floor. “Oh my God!”

Abby had pulled her phone out of her pocket, and was staring at Twitter in horror. “This phenomenon isn’t confined to Gladstone, Sandy! It’s global! Reports are coming in from all over the world. Women everywhere – just women – all started defecating at the same time, and haven’t stopped. Nobody knows why.”

The lift stopped at the fifth floor, and the door opened. In walked an incredibly busty young woman in a microskirt, accompanied by a familiar-looking lad and a strange man of about forty. Both men were carrying heavy-looking black bin bags. The girl was carrying an overnight bag.

She did not look scared, or worried, and Abby regarded her suspiciously. When they reached the ground floor, the lift doors opened, and the busty girl left, along with the two men. The girl was clearing defecating – her bulging panties were growing visibly beneath the hem of her ridiculous skirt – but she seemed oddly unconcerned about this.

“We should go back upstairs,” said Sandy nervously. “If you’re right, and this is happening everywhere, we might as well give up our quest for a toilet. Now I’m feeling like I need to get dressed.”

“Didn’t that girl strike you as odd?” inquired Abby. “I’m going to follow her and see what she does. She seems way too casual about this whole thing.”

“You think she might know something we don’t?” asked Sandy.

“I don’t know. I just know something’s weird about her.” Abby stepped out of the lift, and walked quickly after the girl and the men with the bags. At the door of the lobby, she watched as the girl crossed the car park, then stopped next to a Vauxhall Viva. As she turned away from the older man, he pulled open one of the black bags, and she deftly lifted her skirt, then emptied out her panties. It was almost as if she had done it before...

“Those bags are full of poo!” exclaimed Abby. She flung open the door, and ran out into the car park. “Hey!” she said.

Sandy, hesitating at the door, had not grasped the implications of the situation to the extent that Abby had. Nevertheless, she sensed that Abby was on to something – something that might provide a solution to, or at least an explanation for, this poo crisis. So, despite her anxiety about being outdoors in just a tank top and panties, she dashed outside after Abby, grabbing at her bouncing panties as they threatened to fall down her thighs.

“Are those bags full of poo?” Abby demanded, as she approached the busty girl.

Nicola quailed a little at the taller girl’s glare. “Um, yeah,” she said. “I just happened to have some bin bags when my poo started ... quite lucky really! Would you like one?”

Abby’s brow furrowed. “Wait – you seem familiar...”

“It’s Nicola, from Disraeli Hall,” said Ewan. “The girl with all the acne?”

“Nicola?” said Sandy, wide-eyed, as she approached.

“Jesus fuck!” said Abby. “You’re unrecognisable! Where did those stonking great tits come from?”

“Long story,” said Nicola.

“Which we don’t have time for,” said Lucifer. “Come on, let’s go.”

“Wait a minute!” said Abby, whose poo was beginning to ooze up over the top of the waistband of her capris. “You’ve clearly been crapping for longer than anyone else. I’m betting you know something about what’s going on. Am I right?”

“Have you, like, infected us all with a virus or something?” asked Sandy.

“It’s nothing like that,” said Ewan.

“Ewan!” said Lucifer sharply.

“Maybe they could help!” said Ewan defensively. “We need to fix this, right? But none of us can do it; we need an outsider. Maybe two!”

“I knew it!” said Abby triumphantly. “You do know what’s going on! And you think you can fix it? Well, if I can help with that, I will.”

“Me too,” said Sandy.

Lucifer sighed. “This is getting out of control!” he said. “But fine. Climb in, all of you. We need to get out of this madness before the rioting starts.”

“Why do you think there’ll be rioting?” asked Sandy nervously.

“I suppose it’s inevitable,” said Abby. “Once the shock has worn off, people are going to be angry. We could be facing the collapse of civilisation.”

“We need to get somewhere quiet, where we can plan, and act, without risking getting caught up in the violence,” said Lucifer.

“Without getting lynched, you mean,” muttered Ewan. “It didn’t take long for these two to figure out we’re involved.”

“All right then, let’s go,” said Abby. She opened a door and climbed into the back of the car, but as she sat down, there was a sudden ripping sound. The rear seam of her capris, already under intense strain from the large volume of poo forcing the material outwards, had given way, creating a gaping hole from the waistband down to the base of her buttocks. “My capris!” she said.

“Least of your worries, I should have thought,” said Lucifer, getting into the driver’s seat.

“I’m going to make a bit of a mess of the seat!” said Sandy apologetically, as she prepared to get in next to Abby.

“Abby’s already made a mess, so don’t worry about it,” sighed Lucifer. “All things considered, it’s a minor issue. I’ll make it up to Mrs Wade, if and when this thing blows over. Nicola, you might as well get in the back too, so we keep the poo to the back of the car.”

Nicola paused in the act of climbing into the passenger seat. “Oh,” she said. “Should I not bother with a bag, then, Lucifer?”

“Up to you,” said Lucifer. “I don’t think it’ll make much difference now. The issue of disposal is rather out of our hands now.”

Nicola went around the car, and climbed into the back seat as Sandy shifted over to the middle. She grimaced as she sat down in a small pile of Sandy’s poo. Her own poo squished out of her panties, and she sighed. Would she ever be clean again...?

“His name’s really Lucifer?” Sandy asked Nicola quietly.

“Yes,” said Nicola. “But don’t worry – he’s not the Devil!”

Ewan got into the passenger seat, and Lucifer set off. But neither he nor anyone else was prepared for the chaos that awaited them on the main road, which was gridlocked. “Jeez!” exclaimed Lucifer. “We’re never going to get anywhere like this!”

“Since we’re stuck here,” said Abby, “why don’t you explain what’s going on?”

Lucifer said nothing for a moment. Then he turned around, and glared at Sandy and Abby. “Keeping the two of you around, and especially telling you the truth, could have potentially disastrous consequences,” he said. “So before I go on, I need you to remain silent, and not say anything, until we’re all agreed on what you should say. Your next words could help prevent the collapse of civilisation ... or they could guarantee it. Nod if you understand.”

Both Abby and Sandy nodded, wide-eyed.

“I have the power to grant wishes,” said Lucifer. “Any given person gets one wish, and that’s it. The wish takes effect immediately, and can be taken very literally – so don’t for fuck’s sake speak in metaphor. As soon as the wish is made – at least, if it works – I disappear from here and reappear somewhere else – hopefully close by, but it might take me a while to get back here. Ewan, can you drive?”

“I can,” said Ewan, “though I doubt I’ll have to.”

“What are your names?” asked Lucifer. “Just say your name; nothing else.”

“Abby,” said Abby.

“Sandy,” said Sandy.

“Okay,” said Lucifer. “Abby, I’ve got a lot of experience with wish-making, and I know how disastrously they can go wrong. So I’m going to need you to trust me, say what I tell you to say, and not fuck around and change the script. Most of all, I need you to not get selfish on me and wish for something for you personally. Nod if you agree.”

Abby nodded.

Lucifer breathed deeply, then exhaled. “Ewan here really screwed up with his wish, and I don’t want a repeat of that. Unfortunately his wording could hardly have been worse. He wished that all women had Nicola’s problem. And while I wish you could wish that every woman’s poo would disappear at the moment it left her arsehole, that wasn’t the full extent of Nicola’s problem. Her problem, as we had been discussing, was disposal of the vast quantities she was producing. And you can’t make a wish that contradicts another wish. It won’t work. So the problem of the world’s women defecating endlessly, and having to dispose of large quantities of poo ... that’s set in stone at this point. Nothing can cure that.”

“Well shit!” exclaimed Abby. “So why the fuck...”

“Quiet!” snapped Lucifer, and Abby fell silent. “There’s still stuff we can do. And a bigger problem to solve. All this poo ... its being created ex nihilo. It’s actually adding to the weight of the Earth. I calculated that Nicola will produce three tonnes of poo every day. Multiply that by three and a half billion ... you see the problem? I haven’t got as far as working out how long it will take for the extra weight to have an impact on Earth’s gravity, but the disposal effort alone ... it’ll be horrendous.”

“So what’s the solution?” asked Nicola.

“I suggest we put an expiry date on the poo,” said Lucifer. “Wish for it to disappear after a certain amount of time. Not too short a time to contradict Ewan’s wish, but short enough to ensure that the world’s infrastructure doesn’t grind to a halt. Let’s say ... half an hour. I think that will be safe. That would be about, oh, seventy kilos of poo. That would count as a large volume, I should think.”

“So would two kilos!” said Nicola. “Can’t we have Abby try a shorter time – say, one minute – and if it doesn’t work, have Sandy try, say, ten minutes? Half an hour seems excessive!”

“It might be overly cautious,” said Lucifer, “but I want to give the wish the best chance of working. But you’re right; we have two people here who haven’t made a wish yet. Can we compromise? Try five minutes first, and if that doesn’t work, twenty minutes? I really think one minute is far too short, and highly unlikely to work.”

“But worth a try!” Nicola persisted. “We can conscript someone else if neither girl’s wish works ... but let’s set the expiry time at the smallest value, rather than an unnecessarily large value through excessive caution!”

“But then we’ve got to tell more people,” grumbled Lucifer. “And I’ll be bouncing around all over the place. Oh fine. One minute, then. Abby, repeat this exactly. Nod if you’re ready.”

Abby nodded.

“I wish that every woman’s poo would cease to exist one minute after leaving her rectum,” said Lucifer.

“Wait – that might not work,” said Ewan. “Wouldn’t ‘poo’ refer to the whole thing? If so, then it’ll never leave her rectum.”

“Good point!” said Lucifer. “I’m not sure it would be interpreted that way – intent is what matters – but sometimes ambiguity can cause problems. So, how to phrase it better...”

“What about wishing for every particle of poo to disappear after a minute?” suggested Sandy.

“Don’t speak!” Lucifer urged her. “Although ... that’s actually a good idea. So Abby...”

“I’ve got it,” said Abby. “Shall I go ahead?”

Lucifer grimaced, then nodded. “Almost certainly won’t work,” he muttered.

“I wish,” said Abby, “that every particle of every woman’s poo will from now on cease to exist one minute after it passes through her anus.” Then she gasped, as Lucifer vanished. “Whoa!”

“Yeah, that happens,” said Nicola. “Let me see where he is...”

“If he’s disappeared, though,” said Ewan excitedly, “doesn’t that mean the wish worked?”

“Yes!” said Nicola. “That’s what he said, anyway.” Her phone rang, and she answered it. “Hi! Okay – see you shortly.” She hung up. “He just got out of someone’s shed nearby. He’ll be here soon.

“Hey!” said Sandy, looking down at the pile of poo surrounding her panty-clad loins. “I think something’s happening! My poo isn’t spreading out so much. In fact I think it may have stopped!”

“Mine too, I think!” said Nicola excitedly. “It really must have worked!”

“Hmm!” said Abby. “It’s a little hard for me to tell, but ... I think you may be right!”

They now saw Lucifer jogging towards them. A moment later, he had climbed back into the car. “It worked, I take it?” he asked.

“Yes!” said Nicola. “We think so, anyway.”

“Well bugger me!” said Lucifer. “I really wasn’t expecting that. But that’s great! Let’s just test it to make sure, though. Can one of you completely empty your panties, and then start doing a poo in them again?”

“I can do that,” said Sandy. She unbuckled her seatbelt, and lifted her bottom off the seat, then she tugged the back of her panties down, shook the poo out of them, and pulled them back up.

“Okay, I just started my stopwatch,” said Lucifer. “Can you turn around so we can see?”

Sandy blushed in embarrassment, but nodded. Turning and putting her hands on top of the back of the seat, she hoisted her bottom into the air so that Lucifer and Ewan could get a good look at her panties filling up. They watched, mesmerised, as the bulge in her panties grew and grew, reaching the size of a grapefruit in less than thirty seconds. It continued to swell, growing larger and larger ... and then it stopped.

“One minute exactly,” said Lucifer. “You’re still doing a poo, though, right Sandy?”

“Yup, it’s still coming out,” said Sandy.

“And yet the bulge is no longer growing,” said Lucifer. “Fantastic! At least we’ve averted the Earth’s weight-gain crisis! And disposal of all the poo won’t be much of an issue now. What’s been generated so far will take some cleaning up, but that won’t take long in the great scheme of things. Good job Abby!”

“I still have a wish, though, right?” said Sandy. “Perhaps I can make it even better?”

“Best not to try!” said Lucifer firmly. “Too much chance of something going wrong. I think we should just be grateful to have stabilised the situation.”

“That’s easy for you to say!” Abby retorted. “You’re not doomed to have shit constantly coming out of your arse! It’s going to be no picnic going around with my panties full of smelly shit all day and night! Can we at least brainstorm potential solutions to this problem?”

“Of course, of course,” said Lucifer placatingly. “I didn’t mean to downplay your problem. I’m just concerned about making a tolerable situation worse. But yes, we can brainstorm.”

“What if Sandy wished that everyone’s poo wasn’t smelly?” suggested Ewan.

“I suspect that would count as part of the ‘problem’ that you wished on all women,” said Lucifer.

“You said that about the multiple bags of poo,” Ewan countered. “And that turned out not to be the case.”

“True,” Lucifer conceded. “I suppose it would make the whole situation more bearable for everyone, if it worked.”

“I wish Lucifer no longer had the power to grant wishes,” said Sandy.

Lucifer vanished. Everyone turned and stared at Sandy. “What have you done?” asked Nicola, horrified.

“I did what had to be done,” said Sandy with a shrug. “Nobody should have that much power. Look what’s happened already. Clearly the laws of physics are no obstacle. Someone could accidentally destroy the universe, or end life on Earth, or all human life. I mean, the collapse of civilisation would be bad enough, but can you not imagine someone saying something like ‘I wish everything would just stop!’?” She paused for a moment to let that sink in. “The rotation of the Earth, the air flowing into our lungs, the neural processes in our brains ... the movement of atoms, molecules, photons...”

Nicola shuddered. “Why would anyone say something like that though?”

“Does it matter?” said Sandy. “Perhaps they’re mentally ill. Perhaps they’re just overwhelmed. And perhaps they’re not even talking to Lucifer; just within earshot of him. The point is, it’s just one of many kinds of unintentional wish that could have horrific consequences. Until now, though none of us knew it before today, our very lives were at the mercy of random people’s wishes and the power of one man to grant them. Well, not any more.”

Nobody said anything for a while. Then Abby said, “He was our last chance at making a bad situation a little better, though. Dealing with the smell would’ve been nice.”

“I only had one wish though,” said Sandy. “Sorry.”

Abby sighed. “I’m just grumbling,” she said. “You did the right thing.”

“I’m not sure Lucifer will see it that way, though!” said Nicola nervously.

A few minutes later, Lucifer opened the driver’s door and climbed in. He turned around, and smiled at Sandy. “Good job, Sandy,” he said.

“You’re not upset?” she asked.

“Heck no!” said Lucifer. “I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off me! I no longer have to worry about what people will accidentally wish for around me; I don’t have to suffer the inconvenience of being teleported to God knows where. I’m finally free!”

“So ... what happens now?” asked Abby. “We all just ... adapt?”

Lucifer nodded. “Women are very quickly going to figure out that the poo is somehow disappearing, one minute after leaving their arsehole. And they’ll adapt to that. A good sturdy pair of panties should hold a couple of kilos of poo. They’ll ... you’ll ... soon get used to going around with poo-filled panties. And you needn’t worry about sitting down in it and making a mess ... because any mess will disappear within a minute. Even streaks and smears on the outside of your panties, or on other items of clothing, will vanish entirely. The biggest issue will be the smell ... but people will get used to even that.”

“Well then, I’m going back to Gladstone!” said Abby. “Nice to meet you, Lucifer, but the poo I did before I made my wish isn’t going anywhere; I’m feeling the need to clean up, and change.” She opened her door, and climbed out.

“Me too,” said Sandy, giggling nervously as she shuffled towards the open door. “I’m a little underdressed!”

“And me,” said Nicola. “Will you stick around, and take me clothes shopping afterwards, Lucifer?”

“Nope,” said Lucifer. “Now that I’m free, I’m going to set you free, too. You don’t need me anymore, Nicola.”

“What?” said Nicola, aghast. “You’re dumping me?”

“You should be with someone your own age, Nicola,” said Lucifer gently. “Now that you’re in the same boat as anyone else, poo-wise, I have no concerns about you finding a boyfriend. Ewan, perhaps you might be so good as to take Nicola clothes-shopping?”

“I’d love to!” said Ewan. “If, that is, you’d like me to, Nicola.”

“But Lucifer!” said Nicola. But her heart was not in it; she knew that Ewan was attracted to her, and she was quite interested in seeing how this might develop.

“I’ve made my mind up,” said Lucifer. “Go, clean up, go shopping with Ewan – you’ll have a blast, and you’ll soon forget about me.”

Nicola leaned forward, and kissed him on the lips. “If that’s what you want,” she said. “Thanks for ... everything, Lucifer.”

“You’re welcome,” he said. “Now piss off, both of you. I need to go and get this car cleaned.”

Ewan and Nicola climbed out. Lucifer lowered his window. “I would drive off dramatically,” he said, “but I appear to be stuck here until the traffic clears up. So just toddle off, both of you – and have wonderful lives.”

Nicola smiled, and nodded. “You too, Lucifer,” she said.

As she and Ewan walked back towards the twin tower blocks of Disraeli Hall and Gladstone Hall, Ewan said, “You could have anyone now, you know. You’re like ... goddess-hot.”

Nicola giggled. “No I’m not,” she said. “Lucifer fixed my acne, and cleaned my hair up nicely ... and he gave me big boobs ... but I’m still just plain old me.”

“You’re beautiful,” Ewan insisted. “But even though all women are now filling their panties with poo constantly, I don’t think you’ll find many men who won’t find that a turn-off. But I, personally, think it’s sexy as hell. And I would be honoured if you would consider going out with me.”

Nicola beamed happily. “I’ll consider it,” she said lightly. “Let’s see how our shopping trip goes. Should I assume you’d like to see me in more short skirts?”

“Yes please!” said Ewan. “The shorter, the better!”

“With my full panties showing beneath?”

“Gosh! Yes!” Ewan’s eyes were shining.

“Okay,” said Nicola, smiling. “But I also really want to show off my breasts. Will you be okay with my wearing low-cut tops, and displaying lots of cleavage?”

Ewan grinned. “Yes, I think I can handle that,” he said.


THE END


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