The Downward Spiral:

The first real steps are often the ones you don't realize are first...

       Life rocked along, considering Donna and the trip to New England had been my first true sexual encounter, everything was fairly unchanged.  I still went online and chatted women up and down.  Oddly, it seemed to me, I was far more popular with women online than in real life.  Now I know more than a few people start to loose that distinction as they become more popular online than in real life, but I was careful to separate the two in my mind so I didn't loose perspective.

       I had plans to meet with a very good friend who had gone to college in Colorado, and decided I would test the waters of Internet women again while I was up there.  I had a nice time with a girl from Greely and on the last day we got really close to sex, but her moral won out over lust and when she asked me to stop I did, even thought I almost had her naked.  I think now, if I had gotten her naked she wouldn't have been so able to overcome the passion of the moment.  Then again, I like taking my time during the heavy petting stage of working up to sex.  

       During this point in my life I ran across an older woman online named Kathleen.  At some point during chat room tomfoolery, something in her locked on me.  I can't recall all that happened to cause that change but she and I started talking through instant messages more and more and soon it changed to phone calls and we chatted on the phone and online for probably six months.  Kathleen was 15 years older than me and in what she considered a very unfulfilling marriage.  She started dropping hints that she wanted to meet and the calls went from conversation to phone sex, a bizarre and oddly erotic concept.  I was just having fun but it became clear that she was now on a mission.      

       "I have a job in Dallas in two weeks."  He job was to go help the Mom and pop stores go out of business and to make sure they tied up all the legal and financial loose ends as they did.
       "Kate," she hated to be called by anything more than her full name, until we started with the phone sex.  I enjoyed making her like something that repulsed her.  "I can't trust my car to go the 400 miles from her to there.  And to go that distance for one night... I can't."
       "I'll buy you a seat on an airplane..." she finally got fed up with me and we didn't speak for weeks.  I thought she might be a little unbalanced after she worked so hard to get me there anyway so I didn't give it much thought.  After a few weeks, she popped back up again and wanted to call.  She and I went on in the phone/online routine for another few months when she announced she was coming to Houston.  She already had the tickets.  I had no idea of what she looked like only that she was 40 years old.  I had to have a picture to know her by at the airport.  She agreed and a friend came to rescue me if she was nuts.  She sent me the picture.  She was not a super model but she didn't look bad at all, but it was a headshot and I was interested in seeing the whole package.

       Now I have friends that balk at a gray hair on a woman and write her off, but in my family there is a tendency to get gray early.  I started getting the odd gray hair when I was sixteen, so the fact that Kate a few gray hairs didn't phase me.  She was a fit woman with simple tastes.  I could tell that by the faded jeans and turtle neck blouse.
She was about five feet six inches and had an eager smile and a sultry voice.  She had blue eyes and probably weighed around one hundred and ten pounds.  We made small talk with my back up and headed off to get her rental car and then get to her hotel.  We chatted all the way to the car and to hotel and I carried her suitcase up for her.  We checked out the hotel room and started chatting again.  I found from the time we met in the air port and hugged, I wanted to kiss her and urge had kept on growing so as I moved one way and she another, I put my left hand on her neck, just below the hinge of her jaw.  This got her to quiet and look up at me, and we finally kissed.  It was a slow kiss but it built up quickly and I knew I wanted to get her naked and fuck her silly, so I broke the kiss and said she should take me to my parents house so I could get my car.  We did.  TO this day I don't know why my instincts told me not to stay with her through the night, but I knew I wouldn't.  We got my car came back to the hotel and started kissing again.  This time there was no reason to stop.  The kiss grew in intensity and as the embrace and the moment became more heated, our teeth occasionally clashed.  She was so hot that in ten minutes I was undressing her.  I love undressing women.  I mentioned that Kate was forty, but I'll be damned if her body wasn't better than the few twenty something's I had seen.  She had the shape and the proportions of a playmate model, and I was amazed it the beautiful breasts she was able to conceal under her shirt, once I got her front hooking bra off.  I began to nuzzle and nibble her nipples and her neck and she began moaning.  I started kissing and nibbling her stomach and then her thighs and parked myself down to eat my first pussy.  I was so horny at the point I started tasting her tender folds without noting the string.  She let me go for a while before she stopped me.
       "You can't."  She moaned as she tried to pull me away.
       "Why not?"  I wanted badly to eat a nice hairy snatch.
       "Because it's my time of the month."  Now I noticed the string.  We went back to kissing and fooling around and she started undressing me.  At the time, I passed it off as my need to build my confidence through others, but I don't think it is now.  Her eyes lit up when she got my jeans off.  I don't wear underwear with jeans.  They are confining enough but with underwear and a sudden case of arousal, they can be painful, beside underwear with denim seems like a padlock on a paddock gate to keep the cows from opening it.  She put it in her mouth immediately.

       Now I'm going to tear away from this to explain a bit about me.  I had always considered everything about me to be totally average, this included penis size.  I also never felt the urge to compare any part of myself to anyone else, especially not my penis.  I kept my head down and avoided looking at any time possible.  As I gained lovers and experience here and there I learned I had a respectable sized cock.  Not one of the murderous sized ones you see in the dirty stories, but almost a full eight inches.  Now dirty story experts may scoff at this admission, but the facts are that the average penis size is no more than six inches.  Simple anatomy tells you that some of the stories are just beyond reason.  Once a cock gets to a certain size, it's dangerous to the human body.  How can someone take a 13-inch cock down their throat without ripping out their vocal cords?  Vaginal sex with a cock that size?  It's more likely to rip or damage a woman's uterus and make her cock hungry if she take is all.  And, my fellow men, try shoving a 13-inch tube up your anus and tell me it feels divine.  All of this I know now which is why I say I now know why her eyes lit up when my cock sprang free.  I never asked her the question I had asked other women I had gone out with to try and boost my ego, but she boosted it all the same.