Chapter 1
"Abbey, are you listening? I said I wanted your help on my art project," Sadie said, curling her hair around her finger.
I shook my head and looked at her. "Sorry. I have a lot on my mind."
Sadie frowned, "Well, anyway, like I was saying... Oh, right. Could you help me?"
"Uh, sure," I mumbled. Of course Sadie wouldn't care how I felt or what was going on in my person life. She never did. About anyone.
She started talking about something else then and I tuned her out completely.
"Abbey, are you feeling okay?" Josh asked, whispering in my ear.
I swallowed hard. Josh was my best friend. My gay best friend. That never stopped me from being friends with him. Though Sadie didn't really like him too much she dealt with him, hardly saying much to him.
"My brother's coming home from school for the summer. He wants to help my mom with Grace." Grace was my little sister. She was only two years old. She was very hard to handle.
He patted my hand. "I'm sorry. If you want, you can come over and stay with me at my house."
"I have to help Sadie tonight," I said, lowering my voice.
"Forget her. Your needs are more important," he said with a grin.
"I can't. She's my friend."
He sighed. "Well... call me, okay?"
I nodded. "If I have any time, I will."
He smiled. "Okay. Well I have to get to class."
I groaned softly. "Don't leave me here with her."
"You'll be fine," he said. He patted my shoulder and walked off.
I frowned and reached for my purse. Sadie was still talking. "I'm sorry to do this, Sade. But I have to go see Mrs. Shannon about something."
She frowned then quickly recovered it. "See you after school then?"
I nodded. "Yeah." I held my books close to my chest and walked down the hallway.
"Abbey, wait up!" Someone yelled from behind me.
I paused and turned, seeing Eric running past some people to catch up to me. He stopped in front of me and grabbed my hand.
"What?" I asked, taking him in. His hair was gelled back with that pound of gel he thought was necessary. His backpack strap was slung over one shoulder, probably an attempt to look cool. He always tried way too hard.
"I haven't seen you at all today. Where have you been?"
I didn't have a good excuse. I wasn't hiding from him or anything but I knew he'd think I was.
"I had a huge test earlier and Josh was helping me study."
His face fell a little. "You didn't want me to help you?"
"Josh is in AP English. I figured he'd be my best choice," I explained, starting to walk to my locker, Eric's hand still in mine.
"Okay, well..." he sighed and leaned against the locker beside mine. "I really don't like that kid, Ab."
I rolled my eyes where he couldn't see and brushed a strand of hair back behind my ear. "It's not like he likes me like that, Eric. We're just friends."
He took a book from my locker and flipped it open to a random page. "That's what I said before we started going out. It's something a guy says when he wants to get in your pants."
I glared at him. "He's gay, Eric."
"Gay boys like sex, too."
"And you would know?" I asked, ripping the book from his hands.
He sighed and straightened. "Abbey-"
"Don't, Eric." I said, tossing the book into my locker. I slammed the door shut and looked at him. "You can't change my mind about him."
"Come on, babe," he said, slinking his arm around me.
I shrugged him off. "Eric, don't. I'm not in the mood."
"What about tonight? Would you be in the mood then?" He asked, whispering in my ear.
"I'm already busy."
"Don't tell me-"
"It's with Sadie." I said, starting to walk down the hall toward my next glass. Sometimes, I was glad to get away from Eric. He could get annoying at times.
He got quiet.
I pushed him away a little. "I'll call you tonight, okay?"
He sighed. "Fine."
I gave him a light smile before walking off to class.
---
"You read Nathaniel Hawthorne?" A girl asked, standing by my desk.
I looked up and closed my book a little. "I needed something for my English book report and this looked good."
She smiled. "It's a really good book. And he's a good author, if that counts for anything."
"You read books like this?" I asked, trying to hide my smirk.
She shrugged, her blonde hair falling down her shoulders to spill at her sides. "When I'm babysitting and my neighbor won't get to sleep."
"You read books on adultery to little kids?" This girl was crazy. No doubt about that.
She laughed. "I'm kidding. I'm into poetry and novels and stuff like that. It's a hobby."
"Kind of boring if you ask me."
She shrugged and looked around the room. Most of the chairs were already filled. The teacher told us to pick new seats; I'd chosen to sit in the back, to get away from the jocks that filled the middle seats. She sat down in the empty seat beside my desk. "I don't really have much to do when I'm home."
"No friends?" I asked, running a hand through my hair.
She shook her head. "Not yet. I just moved here."
"Oh." No wonder I didn't know her.
She smiled and held out a hand. "I'm Lucy."
I took her hand hesitantly. "Abbey."
"Settle down!" Mr. Chestnut said, walking into the room. The door swung shut behind him, closing with a loud click. "Does anyone know..."
I tuned him out and sat back in my chair. Lucy seemed... different, unlike any other girl I'd ever met at this school. I wonder if she noticed how mean some of these people here could be.
Chapter 2
"Hold still. I need to capture your profile perfectly," Sadie said, the paintbrush wedged between her pink lips. Her lip gloss was sure to leave marks on the brown wood.
"So I can't move? Even if I have an itch?" I asked, fighting the urge to move.
"No!" she said, her eyes narrowed. "You can't move!"
I sighed. "Make it quick. Please?"
She nodded. "Don't worry. It shouldn't take too long."
I had never heard anyone talk so much in such a short amount of time. Though that probably wasn't her record I didn't think. She rambled on about her boyfriend, Preston, and how he wanted her to go with them to the beach on spring break. How she thought she'd lose her V card that weekend.
I almost screamed and stormed out. But I gritted my teeth and didn't say anything. It took her almost two hours to finally finish and she didn't even use colors. Just black and white.
"Thanks for this." She said, setting the paintbrush in a cup of water.
"Yeah," I said, sliding my arms through my coat.
"Oh, hey, I was hoping I wouldn't forget... Do you and Eric want to come to a party this Friday night? Kelly Smith is having a big birthday party since her parents won't be in town that night."
I shrugged. I knew I couldn't turn down a party invitation. Especially when Sadie was asking. I knew Eric would want to be there, where all the popular kids were. "We'll be there."
She squealed and clapped her hands together a few times. "Good, good."
"Are you and Preston going together?"
"Unless we break up by then."
I laughed.
She didn't. "Okay, well, he's coming over soon so... Out."
I rolled my eyes and headed toward the door. "Thanks."
She waved a hand at me. "Oh, it's no biggie. See you tomorrow?"
"Yeah, see you." I mumbled, walking out the door. I sighed and pulled my phone out of my pocket, no texts from anyone. Not even Eric.
I dialed his number as I crossed the street. It rang about four times before he picked up, sounding angry and ticked off.
"What?"
"I- Eric, it's me, Abbey," I said, unsure of why I was so nervous to talk to him.
He softened a little but not much. "Can I... uh, can I call you back?"
"You're busy?" I asked, sounding more surprised than I had intended. Though it shocked me. He hardly ever did anything when he wasn't with me.
"Yeah, Sam and Warren are over. Can I call you later?"
I held back my frustration - and my tears - and agreed. "Sure."
"Alright. Bye," he said, hanging up.
I gritted my teeth and kicked a can in front of me as hard as I could. I couldn't believe him. Hardly a goodbye and he didn't even tell me he loved me. Though he went nuts when I did that to him.
"Boyfriend problems?" Someone asked, sitting on a porch a few feet away.
I lifted my head, my cheeks now covered in tears. "I guess you could say that."
A girl patted the spot on the concrete step beside her. "Come sit."
I sighed and walked to sit beside her. She had a light pink sweatshirt on and her hair was pulled back into a tight ponytail. Beside her was a thick book, its title hidden in the darkness.
"Relationships suck, don't they?" Lucy, the girl from school earlier that day.
"Tell me about it," I mumbled.
She reached into her pocket and pulled something out: a pack of tissues. "Here. This helps."
I took one out and wiped my eyes, mascara and eyeliner coming off. "Thanks."
"I just ended my relationship. I know what you're going through," she said, hugging her knees to her chest.
"We didn't break up but it feels like it's coming. Like I can almost touch it."
"So be the one to dump him. If he makes you that unhappy..."
"How did you do it?"
"End things? I had to. I was moving. And I didn't want to put my girlfriend through something like that," she said, staring down at her feet, covered in socks but no shoes.
"You're gay?" I asked. There was a hint of surprise in my voice but nothing else. Not hurt, anger, or anything like that. Just... wonder, I guess you could call it.
She groaned and hid her face. "I totally ruined things. When I thought I'd get a... a new friend and-"
"Hey, Lucy, I never said that-"
"I didn't want anyone to know. Not here."
"Why not? It doesn't make you any different than me," I said, taking her arm and trying to pull her so she was facing me.
She was tense and felt a little cold. "That's because you don't hate me for it. Not yet."
I rolled my eyes. "You're being ridiculous, Lucy."
"Oh, am I? When all your friends hate you for something you can't control, is it ridiculous?"
I got quiet and looked away.
She sighed. "I'm sorry about this. I just..."
"No, I get it. You need someone to talk to."
"Do you-"
"My best friend's gay. He's always been gay, as far as I can remember. Don't feel bad."
She smiled a little. "Cool. I'm glad I'm not the only one."
I laughed. "You'd like him. He's pretty open about it, too."
"And he's never been harassed?"
"His brother's on the football team. He's got some people protecting him."
She smiled even more. "He's got it made."
"You will too." I said, getting to my feet. "Just trust me."
"Thanks, Abbey."
Chapter 3
"Come on, baby. I said I was sorry," Eric said, trying to wrap his arm around me.
I shook him off. "Leave me alone, Eric."
"Abbey, I didn't mean to-"
"I don't care what you did or didn't mean to do. You did it and that's what hurts," I said, quickening my pace to get away from him. I knew a break up was coming for us but I didn't care. He was a jerk and I really didn't want him any more.
"Abbey, come on. Let me talk."
I saw Josh standing by my locker, having it already opened for me. He tensed up a little, seeing Eric. Neither of them liked each other but it was both different reasons. Josh was scared but Eric was pissed. Always.
"I don't want to hear it." I said, walking up to my locker. I pushed my books inside with all the anger I had in me.
"What are you doing here?" Eric asked Josh.
"Shut up, Eric."
"Abbey-"
"Look, I know you're sorry and all but... I can't keep... doing this anymore." I said, looking up at him.
"Are you... dumping me?" He asked, shock and surprise in his dark brown eyes.
I shut my eyes for a second and nodded. "Yeah, I am."
"You can't... But I didn't-" he stuttered.
"I'm sorry but I am. I just did." Beside me, Josh smirked.
Eric narrowed his eyes at Josh. "What the hell-"
"Get out of here, Anderson." Luke Peters said, walking up behind Eric.
Eric glared at him for a minute before starting to leave. "We're not done here, Abbey."
I rolled my eyes and shut my locker, letting my forehead hit the cool metal.
"Boyfriend problems?" Luke asked, looking sort of concerned.
I sighed but nodded. "I dumped him."
"He deserved it," Josh said, shrugging.
I looked over him and shook my head. "I am really not in the mood for this."
"Sorry," he mumbled.
"Thanks for getting rid of him," I said, looking up at Luke.
He shrugged. "It's always fun telling him off. You guys good?"
Josh nodded.
Luke patted Josh on the shoulder. "See you at home, kid."
I looked up at josh. "Since when did he start calling you 'kid'?"
He shrugged. "No clue."
I shrugged it off and walked with Josh to lunch.
"So how was that thing with Sadie?" He asked, looking down at me.
"It was hard not to ring her neck," I admitted.
"That bad?"
"She talked all night. It drove me nuts."
He laughed. "Sorry you had to go through that."
"Yeah well... don't say anything to her but I'm not doing that again." I'd never go through that pain again. It was miserable. Painful even.
"I don't see Sadie. Where do you wanna sit?"
I grabbed his hand. "There's someone I want you to meet." I dragged him to a corner of the cafeteria where a girl was sitting at a small table by herself. Lucy.
I sat down across from her. She hardly noticed, her eyes were locked down into the book in front of her.
"Hi, Lucy."
She looked up, a little startled, and smiled. "Hey."
"Lucy, this is Josh. Josh, Lucy," I said.
"Is this the friend you were telling me about?" she asked, unable to stop smiling.
I laughed. "Yeah."
"What?" Josh asked, looking down at me.
I rolled my eyes. "Lucy's gay, too."
He nodded slowly. He really didn't understand.
"Oh, come on. You're always telling me how you don't know anybody like-"
"I said that so you'd help me find someone," he said, blushing a little.
"If you want, I know someone who might be interested," Lucy said.
"You do?" Both Josh and I asked together.
She nodded. "My cousin. He's single now, too."
"Seems like you have a whole network of friends," I said, laughing.
She shrugged. "It helps when you know other people. It kind of... helps."
"I know what you mean. The only gay friend I have lives miles away. I've never met him, to be honest," Josh said.
"Well... you have me now," Lucy said with a smile.
"Thanks."
"I heard about you and Eric," Lucy said softly, unsure of whether she should've brought it up or not.
"It needed to be done."
She took my hand and squeezed it. "It takes guts to dump someone. Especially someone like him."
I looked up at her and our eyes met. She smiled at me, just a little curve of her lips. I smiled back. "It's not him I like."
And I couldn't believe I said that. I might as well have ripped out my hair and said I'm the dumbest person ever. She had to have known that... that I... I... That I what? Liked her? No, I didn't. I couldn't. Not when I thought... I knew I was... I had to have been...
"I need to go see Ms. Green about a French paper," she said, reaching into her bag for something. She pulled back with a small slip of paper. "Call me?"
I nodded, speechless, and stared straight ahead as she walked behind me, toward her destination.
Josh laughed beside me. "Don't tell me-"
I hit him in the chest. "Did I just-"
He pulled me in for a tight hug. "Oh, you did, Abbs."
I looked up at him, my eyes wide with fear. "But what if-"
"Relax, Abbey." He said, taking my shoulders in his hands. "Trust me on this. You'll know it when it happens."
Chapter 4
"Abbey?" Lucy asked into the phone, surprise coloring her voice.
I laughed. "Yeah, it's me."
"Huh, I'm kind of surprised you called." My smile fell a little. Had I screwed up that bad today at lunch? Did she really expect me to hardly talk to her- "What's up?"
I took a deep breath. I could do this... couldn't I? I had to do it and get it over with. It'd be less painful afterward. "I was hoping we could talk... about lunch today."
Oh, great. Now, I felt worse. This whole thing, ever since I met Lucy, has made my life a nightmare. But... obviously that wasn't her fault... was it?
"What about it?" She didn't even know what happened? That... thing between us. Was she seriously kidding me?
"Am I crazy... or did something... happen?"
She laughed, laughed. What was so funny about that? Did she seriously think I wasn't... good enough for her?
"What?" I asked, looking down at my blanket. I pulled a loose string free with a shaking hand, my head spinning and my heart hammering.
"You honestly don't know?"
"No, I don't. I wouldn't be... freaking out if I did," I said, sounding a little more harsh than I wanted to be. Especially with her.
"It's no big deal, Abbey."
"Then tell me why... why do I feel this way? I never have before."
"You dumped your boyfriend because he wasn't treating you right. That's kind of a sign, at least to me it is. And that whole thing today at lunch... You think I don't know what happened there? That's why I made that sucky excuse and got out of there. I knew that you weren't... and I didn't want it to ruin our friendship and..." She took a deep breath. "I just don't know if you want the same things I do."
"You mean girls?"
"I mean 'us'," she said, sounding like she was on the verge of tears.
"Can I come over and talk?" I asked, getting to my feet. I grabbed my sweatshirt and had it over my head when she spoke again.
"Let me pick you up."
I laughed, nervousness practically gone. "You don't even know where I live."
"I do, too. Josh gave me directions."
"You talked to him?" I asked, appalled.
She laughed. "He called and told me what he said to you. Then he said that you'd probably call me. Which you did. And thanks, by the way. I was dying the entire time I was waiting for you to call me."
"I'm sorry," I mumbled, biting m nail. "I wasn't sure what to say and... you know."
"Give me a few minutes. I'm almost there."
"You're on your way?" I asked, pulling my sweatshirt on the rest of the way.
She laughed again. "See you soon." She hung up.
I sighed and shut my phone, sliding it into my back pocket. Oh, my gosh. Was this really happening?
---
I ran down the porch steps, trying not to trip and fall and hurt myself, two at a time and opened the car door. Her car was nice; some sort of small car (I wasn't good with names) with two doors. There was a three-seat backseat with it, leaving for extra room. It was a shinny black with cheetah print seat covers. Someone liked their car.
I slipped in the passenger side and pulled the door shut, seeing my breath just a little in the air.
"Where to?" She asked, turning the heat up a little. Her light pink sweatshirt was on her again, partially covering her hands.
I shrugged. "Your place, I guess."
She smiled slightly and turned back out onto the road.
"I'm sorry you... died, waiting for me to call," I said, looking over at her.
She laughed. "I didn't really die. Though, I must say, it was a very long time."
"I had homework and stuff. And I had to avoid my mom so I could call. She's kind of nosy."
"My mom's definitely different than yours She's all about space and privacy."
"Is she okay with you...?" I asked hesitantly.
"Being gay? Yeah. She's a single parent, raising me all by herself. She told me it was either accept it and get over it or deal with both of us being on our own."
"She sounds nice."
She laughed. "You have to meet her first before you judge her."
"So... not nice, then?"
"You know what I mean."
We didn't say anything for a few minutes and I was starting to wonder if she remembered the conversation we had just had.
She spoke first. "Have you thought about it at all? On whether a guy is better than a girl and vise versa?"
"Based on my last relationship, I'll say that girls are definitely better. But there aren't many girls I'd... date."
"Who would you?" she asked, turning into another street.
Inside my head, the tiny voice that told me Lucy was the one I liked, screamed with joy. "Well... there's Emma Stone, because she's hilarious. Then there's Jennifer- No, scratch that. Then there's... there's you."
"How do I rank with all those prettier, more famous people?"
"I have yet to figure that out. But I'm sure it's a little better since I know you personally."
She laughed and pulled into a small driveway. "We're here."
I took her hand and squeezed it. "Come on, I want to see your room."
Chapter 5
I walked up the concrete porch steps, feeling familiar to me now that I'd been here once before, and stopped on the top one, looking at the house. I paid more attention to it now, seeing what I'd missed before.
It was a brick house, a light on in two rooms of the house. It didn't have a second floor though it looked like it could've had an attic, or at least a small one. There was a porch swing on the far right side and a small round table close to it. A chair was pulled out, as if someone was sitting there but had gotten up for something.
Lucy came up and looked over at me. "Are we going to talk in the cold or go inside?"
"Oh, right," I said, jumping a little.
She smiled and took my arm. "Come on," she led me inside and locked the front door behind her. "Mom, I'm home!"
"In here!" A woman yelled from what I thought was the kitchen.
"That's my mom," Lucy whispered.
I nodded.
She led me down a set of steps and into a large room. There was a bed with blue sheets and blankets in the corner. A TV was sitting on a dresser with a light beside it.
"This is a really big room. And it's all yours?" I asked, still looking around. The floor was plain hardwood but it was covered in small purple rugs.
She nodded. "Birthday money... babysitting money... all that good stuff helps me decorate."
I walked over to her bed and took a seat by the pillows. "I'm kind of glad you didn't come to my house. It's definitely not as nice."
"It's not about how it looks. It's about the people inside it," she said, sitting down beside me.
I pulled my legs under me and looked over at her. "When did you... know?"
"I was thirteen. I'd just... looked at one of my friends one day and wondered why I thought she was so pretty. Then I knew... I really knew."
"Were you... scared at all?"
"About telling my mom or just in general?"
"In general," I said, staring down at my hands in my lap.
"A little. I thought I'd never be able to... find her, the one. But... I think I did." She was looking at me.
I blushed heavily and bit the inside of my lip. "Me?"
A smile grew on her face. "I really haven't met someone as slow as you in... forever."
I laughed nervously.
She reached down and took one of my hands. "You shouldn't be afraid. It's a natural thing. It's love."
I looked down at our hands clasped together. "So what happens now?"
"Now... I ask you to be my girlfriend. And you say yes, of course. And... we live happily ever after."
I laughed. "Oh, so that's how it's gonna work, huh?"
Lucy smiled. "It's an option. One I particularly like though."
I looked up at her and squeezed her hand a little.
She laughed. "I never kiss on the first date."
"There are exceptions for that, aren't there?"
She shook her head. "Sorry. It's a rule."
I pressed my forehead to her shoulder. "It's a sucky rule."
She laughed and brushed my hair back from my face. "You'll forget about it by tomorrow morning."
"I highly doubt it."
"Trust me," she whispered, hugging me.
I sighed and looked at the time. It was getting late. I groaned to myself. I felt like I'd just gotten there, too. "I have to get home soon. Can you take me?"
Lucy laughed. "It'd be my pleasure."
---
"Do you want me to pick you up tomorrow morning?" Lucy asked me.
"Definitely," I said, squeezing her hand. She was so much warmer than I was. Though it was freezing outside of the car.
She stared up at me, watching my face. It was silent for a few minutes.
I blushed heavily.
She laughed. "You look so cute when you blush like that."
"See you tomorrow," I said, my voice wavering a little.
"See you," she said, watching me head inside.
I shut my eyes and sighed for a second, my door shut behind me. Oh, Lucy.
Chapter 6
"What did I tell you?" Josh said, crossing his arms over his chest in the backseat.
"You didn't do anything. You just told me what I already knew," I said, turning in my seat to look at him.
Beside me, Lucy laughed.
"That's what friends are for, Ab," he patted my shoulder.
I rolled my eyes.
"So did you take my advice?" Josh asked Lucy.
"Sort of," she said, pulling into a parking spot in the back of the lot.
"What do you mean sort of?" he asked.
I got out of the car and held my books close to my chest.
"Everything worked out fine, Josh. It doesn't matter what help I used or not," Lucy said, running a hand through her long hair.
"It does to me. I want to know in case I go into the business of helping couples-" he started, then stopped.
Walking up to the three of us, mostly me, was Eric.
I took a deep breath, rolling my eyes in the process. "Why can't you just leave me alone?"
"We need to talk," he said. Two of his friends, Alex and Sam, were watching Eric.
"Then talk."
He looked up at Lucy and Josh then back at me. "Alone."
"No."
"Why not?" He was starting to get mad. I knew that look well.
"I don't have time for this, Eric. Either talk or walk." The problem with Eric was that he was so pushy. You had to be stubborn to get your way. But now... I was mostly annoyed by him. Just him in general.
"That fight... it didn't mean anything." He sounded... afraid, worried. That was a surprise.
"It was your fault, Eric. And it did. To me it did."
He took a step closer to me. "Abbey-"
"Don't. Things have changed."
"Abbs, you're my girl. Come on." He reached his hand out for me.
I took a step away from it, and him. "I'm not 'you're girl'. Don't call me that ever."
"What- You found someone?" he asked, his eyes widening a little in surprise.
I nodded. "Someone that's not you."
"You couldn't... We just..."
I started walking away from him but he grabbed my arm.
"Abbey, don't-"
"Mr. Anderson. Do you need to see me in my office?" Principle Evens said, walking over to the scene.
Eric looked at me for a second, sadness then anger going through his eyes, then let go of me. "No."
"Get to class. All of you." He was still looking at Eric as he spoke.
Eric stalked off to class, his body tense and agitated as he moved.
I sighed and felt tears come to my eyes. I blinked heavily, trying to keep myself from crying. Especially over him.
"Are you alright, Abbey?" He asked, looking at me with concerned eyes.
I nodded. "I'm fine."
He nodded. "Let me know if he bothers you again."
I nodded silently.
He walked off into the school, the sound of the first bell going off.
Lucy walked up to me then, watching me carefully. "Let's get to class."
I nodded and walked inside with her and Josh, not saying a word.
---
"You're still going to that party, right?" Sadie asked over the phone.
I sighed. "I don't know. Eric and I aren't..."
She gasped, almost as if she were mad at me. "No. You guys were so cute together."
"I don't care. I needed out."
"I'm sorry, Abbs. Look, come to the party with me and you'll feel better."
"He'll be there, Sadie. I can't-"
"You can. Show him you're strong."
I bit my lip. I honesty didn't care about any party, actually. I didn't even want to go anymore. Though normally I would've loved to go. "I might."
"So I'll pick you up-"
"Actually, there's someone else I want to take."
"Oh? Someone I know?"
She might have known Lucy but I doubted it. Lucy was quiet and a lot different than Sadie. She didn't act like she knew she was pretty at all. She acted... normal. Which, I knew, was one reason I loved her. "No. I don't think so."
"Don't forget. Nine pm. On the dot," she said, the sound of water running in the background.
I nodded to myself. "Okay. I guess I'll see you there."
"Kay. Bye!" she said cheerfully.
I rolled my eyes and hung up on her. She was a handful. Way too much for me.
Chapter 7
"You do this a lot?" Lucy asked, sticking close to me as we walked down the sidewalk.
"I only came because Eric couldn't be seen by himself," I said, acid creeping into my tone.
"You mean without another girl?"
I nodded. "I never really thought much of it - at first. I mean, we were dating. I thought it was normal. But after a while, I knew. Because that was when I started hating the parties and all. It gets annoying and very monotonous."
"Monotonous?" she asked, a smile on her face.
"Too big of a word?"
She rolled her eyes. "Shut up."
I laughed and stopped where I was. "Is this a date?"
Lucy stopped and turned around to watch me. Her expression was calm, collected. "What do you mean?"
"You said you never kissed on the first date. Is this the second?"
She walked up to me, getting close enough that I could smell her breath, peppermint, and took both of my hands in hers. She leaned in and kissed... my cheek. "Maybe later."
I wanted to scream. I wanted to kick something or punch something. Do something to show my anger. I was dying to kiss her. On the mouth. Why did she have to be so stubborn?
She dropped on of my hands, still holding the other, and started walking again. "Maybe when this party's over you can spend the night, get to know me a little better."
My breath caught. Did she mean-
She laughed, a soft giggle. "I mean, we can talk."
I exhaled and followed her down the sidewalk, hearing the noise of the party increase as we grew closer.
"Good things come to those who wait," she whispered in my ear. She let go of my hand and started toward the party.
We stepped inside the door and into a warm house. There were tons of people, more people than at most parties I'd been to in a while, littered around the rooms. Beer pong was set up at the dinning room table and a girl was chugging a red solo cup, her body pressed into a tall jock's body.
I rolled my eyes and walked further into the house, staying close to Lucy. I knew she wasn't a partier, she didn't look the type. This was a lot different than anything she'd probably been used to. You had to watch out for people like her.
Something I never thought I'd see was in the living room, on the couch. Sadie was sitting beside a girl, a lock of hair twirled around her pointer finger. She laughed and her eyes scrunched together, closing almost completely.
The boy turned his head and I recognized him almost instantly. Eric. He's arm was draped around the back of the couch as if...
Sadie leaned in and pressed her lips to his. Her body curved into his as if they were made for each other.
Lucy followed my gaze and her face fell. "Oh, Abbey."
I shook my head and tears flew. I was crying, full out tears. "I have to... I need to..." I turned and ran out, wiping bitterly at my face, my fingers coming back wet.
"Abbey, wait!" She yelled, running to catch up with me. She stopped in front of me, forcing me to stop running. "Abbey, you have to move on. You dumped him, remember?"
"That's not... I mean, it was... Sadie and..." I shook my head, staring down at my feet. "I thought she was different."
Lucy pulled me in close and ran her hand down my hair. "Let's go home."
---
"I brought you something," Lucy said, walking into the small living room with something in her arms.
I lifted my head from the red pillow, my hair sticking to my wet face. Lucy was in a pair of gray sweatpants, pulled low on her hips. She had a black tank-top on that looked a little small, revealing an inch of her stomach. I had a sudden urge to run my fingers along her skin but I didn't do it.
She sat down on the coffee table to face me. She sat down a bowl of popcorn beside her then handed over something pink: her sweatshirt. "I want you to have this. It's warm and... and it smells like me." She smiled a little. "I was hoping this would make you feel a little better."
I sat up against the pillow, pulling the blanket further up on my lap. I took the sweatshirt from her and held it close to my chest. It was warm.
"Am I ever going to get that kiss?" I asked, my voice sounding thick and stuffy.
She laughed. "Still thinking about that?"
"It's driving me crazy," I admitted, slipping the sweatshirt over my head. It was a little big on me though it was big on Lucy when she wore it. It was very comfortable.
She moved over and sat down beside me. "I'm sorry this night didn't go quite as planned."
I shrugged. "I wasn't expecting... the party. But... the night's been better since we got here."
Lucy bit her lip for a second, thinking to herself. Then, slowly, she leaned in to me until our faces were almost touching at the lips.
"Do it," I whispered, my eyes shutting very slowly.
She moved in the rest of the way and our lips touched, soft then with more pressure. I had been waiting so long for this and now... I realized it was worth it. All of it was. She was worth it.
I untangled my arms and wound them around her neck, my fingers running themselves through her soft hair. She was already so close yet she felt so far away.
It was amazing.
She pulled back with a smile on her face.
I laughed and hugged her tightly. "Thank you."
She squeezed in beside me and pulled the blanket over her legs. "What movie shall it be?"
I laughed and wiped my face. "'Shall'?"
She rested her head on my shoulder. "Yes, 'shall'"
"I think we've had enough weird words for one night."
She grabbed the remote and the bowl of popcorn off the coffee table and set them down between our laps. "Have a movie in mind?"
Chapter 8
The next morning I woke up to my phone ringing on the coffee table.
I sat up quickly, my eyes opened just a little. Lucy gasped and fell off the couch.
I looked down at her, rubbing my eyes. "Are you okay?"
She handed me my phone. "Just answer it. Please."
I gave her an apologetic look before answering it. "Hello?"
"Abbey, when are you coming home?" It was my mom, her voice sounding almost curious.
"Uh... I don't know. I was going to hang out with Lucy today," I said, biting my nail with anxious teeth.
"I was hoping you'd be home today. I wanted to spend some time with you, to talk."
"About what?" I asked, mentally slapping myself. I hadn't meant to say that out loud. But I couldn't take it back now. Great.
"Just things. Can you be home in... half an hour?"
I swallowed hard and avoided looking at Lucy. "I guess so."
"See you then, sweethear," she said, hanging up on me.
I groaned and slid my phone in my pocket.
"What?" Lucy asked, looking up at me with curious eyes.
"My mom... I have to get home."
She nodded and got to her feet. "I'll take you."
Neither of us said anything on the way to my house. I was still feeling pretty bad from the night before so I wasn't exactly in the mood for anything fun.
Lucy kissed my hand softly. "I'm glad you came over last night, even under the circumstances."
I nodded. "It was better with you there."
She smiled. "I'll call you tonight."
"Okay," I said, getting out of the car.
She winked at me before I headed inside, watching her drive away.
"Abbey, is that you?" Mom yelled from the living room.
I took a deep breath and walked into the room. My mom was sitting on the couch, her legs pulled under her, a cookbook in her lap.
She looked up as I walked in and gestured for me to have a seat. "Come in, sweetheart."
I sat down beside her, reading the page that was open. Just a simple recipe that I'd seen my mom make so many times even I knew it by heart.
"What did you need to talk about?" I asked, looking up at her.
She sighed. That couldn't be good. "Sadie called a little bit ago."
I tried acting like I didn't hate her guts. "Yeah? What about?"
"She said she was sorry about last night... Something about a boy you liked or something."
She wasn't sorry. I knew that. She was selfish and she would do anything to get her way. She always had been that way.
"Yeah... things aren't... okay for us anymore."
Mom frowned. "She also mentioned something about you... and Lucy. Is it true that you two are dating?"
My breath caught. I couldn't believe this. I couldn't believe Sadie. How could she do that to me? To my mother? That wasn't fair, wasn't right at all. I wanted to hit her so hard she never messed with me again.
"Dating? N-no, we never-"
Mom sighed, clearly let down by something I had said. She must have known I was lying, straight to her face. She turned and faced me. "This isn't you, Abbey. You're not... You can't be like this."
Like what? Gay? She didn't understand. And I wasn't going to just let her act like I was nuts or anything. I had to speak up. For once. "I am. With Lucy."
Mom shook her head. "How could... Why didn't you... Why didn't you say something to me? I could've helped you, could've done something to change this-"
"You can't change this, mom. This is who I am. I'm never changing, never going to stop liking girls," I said, feeling tears well up in my eyes.
"Abbey... I didn't mean-"
"I know exactly what you mean, mom. But that won't change my mind about her." I stormed out of the room and up the steps.
My brother's door was opening just a little as I walked down the hall. I darted to my room quickly and shut the door, my tears breaking free and falling out fast.
I collapsed on my bed, my head falling into my hands. My mother wasn't going to make me break up with Lucy. She wasn't going to make me regret falling in love with her. No one could do that.
Someone knocked on the door lightly and it pushed open a crack. My brother, Alex, stuck his head in and looked at me. "Can I come in?"
I shrugged, wiping my eyes with the backs of my hands.
He slipped inside and shut the door behind him. "Are you okay?"
I shook my head and sat back against the headboard. "You heard what mom said."
"She shouldn't have acted like that to you," he said softly, sounding like he meant every word.
"I'm not her perfect little girl. She has every right to act like she did," I said miserably.
"Don't say that, Ab," he said, sitting down beside me. "You're perfect no matter what she says about you."
"How can you say that?"
"You're my sister," he said, smiling sadly. "I'd do anything for you. Even standing up for you."
I laid my head on his shoulder. "Did mom tell you? Did she tell you not to talk to me, to make me feel like the awful person I am?"
"Sadie called looking for you. She told me then said maybe next time it wouldn't be me answering. I thought she was lying but... I know you. And I know how you act..."
I looked up at him. "She called here? That-"
"Abbey, don't. Forget her. She doesn't deserve to see you mad. It'll only make her feel better and she doesn't need to be happier than you."
"Alex, I can't. She... I saw her with Eric at the party. Like she was waving it around. She did it on purpose," I said, more tears coming out.
He hugged me tightly. "You have that girl... what's her name? Anyway, you did better than both of them. Who cares if they're together? They don't stand a chance against you."
I pressed my face into his arm. "So you don't hate me?"
"Nope. Never."
I smiled. "Thanks."
"But I kind of do want to see this girl."
I shook my head. "No. You might fall in love with her and steal her from me."
He laughed. "I wouldn't be with her if she did. So... you don't have to worry about a thing."
I hugged him lightly.
The door opened again and our mom walked in, looking like she was about to wring both our necks. Great.
"Alex, would you give Abbey and I some privacy?" she asked, her eyes only on me.
I swallowed hard.
"I don't-"
"Now," she said, crossing her arms over her chest.
"Sorry," Alex whispered, leaving the room quickly.
Chapter 9
"Did you come back to yell at me some more?" I asked, pulling the sleeves of my sweatshirt down. Lucy's sweatshirt.
She sighed and rubbed her temple with one hand. "Why do you think I came to yell at you?"
"I know you, mom. And I heard everything you said ten minutes ago."
She opened her eyes and looked at me hard. "Why would you think I hated you?"
"It's obvious you do. Because I'm in love with a girl."
"I never said that-"
"I heard you!" I said loudly.
"You didn't listen to me, Abigail. I said, I wanted you to tell me sooner. So I could've helped you through all this. So you didn't feel so alone," she said, moving to sit on the edge of my bed.
"But why would you help me?" I asked, my eyebrows scrunching together.
"You're my little girl. I love you, baby," she said, brushing my hair back from my face.
I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to push my tears away.
"Come here," she whispered, holding her arms open.
I crawled into her arms and onto her lap, hiding my face in her chest. She hugged me tightly to her body, kissing the top of my head.
"Would you invite her over? Lucy? I really would like to meet her," she said, sounding almost pleased. That surprised me.
"You really want to meet her?"
She nodded. "Of course. I need to know whether or not she's good enough for you."
"She is," I whispered. "She's amazing."
Mom kissed my head again then she pushed me back a little. "You should get some sleep for now."
I nodded and slipped under the covers.
"I love you, baby girl."
I took mom's hand and squeezed it gently. "I love you, mommy."
She smiled, through tears, and kissed my forehead.
---
Getting the energy and effort to go to school that next Monday was almost impossible. I was still feeling miserable from the 'party' Friday. Not even Lucy could brighten my mood entirely.
I fell asleep in the car on the way to school, my head already aching. I was sure Lucy could tell something was wrong.
Her eyes met mine as she held open the passenger side door for me. She looked worried. "Are you feeling okay?"
I nodded, brushing my hair back from my face. "Just tired."
She didn't say anymore though I knew she didn't believe me.
"Are we going in or what?" Josh asked, looking from one of us to the other.
Lucy nodded. "We should get going."
I got out and followed her inside, wishing I could just hold her hand. But I couldn't. Not here at school.
Sadie was sitting with Eric at lunch, pressed close to his side as if they'd been dating for a long time. I hated her for it.
Lucy stopped me. "Don't do it, Abbey."
I shut my eyes for a second, took a deep breath, and walked over to Lucy's regular table. It was hard, holding in all the anger I felt towards both of them.
"So what if they like each other?" Lucy said, sitting down beside me. "He's not yours anymore."
"It's not that I have feelings for him or anything. I just hate seeing it be her that he's with now." I said, nodding to them. Sadie was laughing, twirling her hair around her fingers.
"Well, at least he didn't chose her over you."
That was true. I had broken us up, not him. So why was I mad?
"She's ugly, if it helps," Josh said, opening his can of soda.
I smiled. "Just a little."
"So, I was thinking about watching some movies after school. You wanna come over?" Lucy asked.
"I'm in," Josh said cheerfully.
I glared at him. "This is girlfriend time, Josh. You wouldn't-"
"Oh, come on. I never get to do anything with you anymore. I'm so left out," he said, pouting.
I rolled my eyes. He always did that when he didn't get his way. And he knew I couldn't resist saying yes.
"Fine," I said. "But don't feel bad if we decide to get all lovey-dovey."
Lucy laughed.
"Do you want to find a gay boy for me? I've tried plenty and there isn't a single one that goes to school here."
"Are you sure?" I asked, crossing my arms over my chest.
His eyebrows scrunched together. "What are you-"
"There has to be someone. We'll help you," I said, patting his hand.
"Or you could do what I did and make a straight guy gay. Sort of like what I did with Abbey," Lucy said, looking over at me.
I felt my cheeks blush slightly. "You didn't 'turn me gay'. Where do you come up with these things?"
She laughed. "I read a good amount of fiction."
"And it tells you how to get a girlfriend?"
"In a sense," she said, smiling at me.
I suddenly felt my heart beat a little faster. She always did that to me. It made me want to take her hand and lace our fingers together. It made me want to lean in and kiss her. But I couldn't. Not here at school.
"Well... how about you two come to my house? We can work something out and-" Josh said.
"And your brother can help," I said, smiling.
His eyes widened slightly. "You've got to be kidding."
"Who knows the kids here better than the football star?"
"She has a point," Lucy said.
Josh sighed. "Okay but if he says anything mean-"
"He won't," I said, taking his soda from him. "He loves you."
Chapter 10
"I feel like I should've seen this coming," Luke said, looking from me to Lucy.
I widened my eyes slightly. Saw it coming? Even I had no idea it had been coming at all. Ever.
"You hang out with my brother all the time. It seemed kind of..." he said, then shook his head. "Never mind."
"No, finish," Josh said, crossing his arms over his chest.
Luke laughed. "Or what? You'll beat me up? I doubt you could."
"I really wish people would stop thinking that being gay is a disease that travels. It's not like Mono," he said, looking really upset.
"People come up with crazy lies because they don't want to believe the truth," Lucy said.
"If anyone, it was Lucy who did it. And it's not really even her fault. She's just so..." I sighed and rested my head on her shoulder.
"Can we keep the nasty love stuff out of here please?" Luke asked.
"Sure," Lucy said. She pulled my face up and kissed me, slow and amazing.
I melted, almost literally. I wrapped my arms around her neck and pulled myself closer to her.
"That 'nasty love stuff' definitely involves kissing," Luke said, looking back down at the notebook in his lap. "Can we just do what you came here for?"
I frowned when Lucy pulled away, giving Luke the finger.
He rolled his eyes. "Who were you thinking of?"
Josh blushed sightly. "Joey."
"Football player Joey? Are you sure?"
He nodded. "It wouldn't kill me. I mean, he's nice... and so cute."
Lucy scrunched her face up in disgust.
Luke laughed. "I take it you're only into Abbey."
She nodded. "Oh yeah."
I smiled and squeezed Lucy's hand.
Josh named off a few more people before yawning deeply.
"Are you sure mom's gonna let them stay over?" Luke asked, nodding to me. He always locked himself away in his room or the basement when I came over, knowing Josh and I would be up all night.
Josh rolled his eyes. "Abbey's always over here."
He shrugged and left, already getting his phone out to text someone.
I moved to sit on Josh's bed, pulling Lucy up with me. "Have anything fun planned for us?"
---
"Abbey? Are you awake?" Lucy asked softly in the darkness.
I rolled towards her and felt her hair brush against my bare arm. "Yeah. What's up?"
"I can't sleep," she said, covering her hand with mine.
"Come here," I said, pulling her close against my side. "It took me a while to get used to staying-"
"It's not that," she said and rolled so she was on top of me. My breathing quickened. "I have a lot on my mind."
I'll say, I thought. I brushed a strand of her hair away from her face and pulled her down to kiss me. "What is it? You can tell me."
She pulled back just a little and her hair fell around my face like a curtain, tickling my cheeks softly. "I don't want to freak you out."
I laughed. "It takes a lot to freak me out, Luce."
She ran her thumb along my cheek, staring down at me with her beautiful eyes. "I was just thinking... about us. Like how I'm glad I met you, that we've had a chance to be together."
"Why'd you think it'd freak me out?" I asked.
"Because we haven't been... all that intimate and stuff and... I thought it'd be weird. For you, anyway."
I laughed and kissed her softly. "It doesn't scare me. I'm glad you told me this."
Lucy laughed and pulled me in close. "Did I ever tell you how beautiful you are?"
I moved my head under hers, hiding my face in her neck. "A lot I think."
"Well you are. And you should know."
I sighed and let my eyes close. "We should do something next weekend. Just the two of us."
"Like a movie date?"
I nodded, my head hitting her jaw line. "Yeah. We can cuddle and stuff."
Lucy laughed. "You really like that, huh?"
"Only with you." I said, yawning deeply.
Her hand found my elbow and rubbed my arm gently, making me shiver though I wasn't cold. I felt so protected in her arms, so peaceful. I could've slept a long time there with her. She was all I needed.
"Shut up," Josh said from the floor.
Lucy's body shook as she tried not to laugh. "Night, Abbey."
"Night, Lucy." I breathed into her neck. I settled in closer and felt myself already start to drift off. I was content with her, peaceful. I loved it. I loved her.
Chapter 11
"I'm nervous," Josh said, staring down at his hands in his lap.
I rubbed his arm. "It'll be okay. I promise."
He exhaled a shaky breath. "What if he really doesn't like me?"
"Who wouldn't like you?" I said softly, taking his hand in mine.
"I could name a few," he said, looking over at me.
I opened the door and pulled him out. "Just be open."
"Don't let him think you're joking," Lucy said out the open car window.
Josh nodded. "Okay."
I smiled and hugged him. "You'll be fine."
He nodded and headed for the football field.
I got into the front seat of Lucy's car and looked over at her. "Do you really think this will work?"
"Hey, if we could find each other, he can find someone."
I smiled and rested my head on the back of the seat.
"So... my mom wanted to know if you'd wanna come over and have dinner with us one night."
I laughed and looked over at her. "Dinner? What if I do something wrong and-"
"It's not fancy or anything," she said, taking my hand. "My mom wants to make your favorite. Even if it's a simple TV dinner."
"Seriously?" I asked, surprised. No one had ever done this for me. This must be a big deal then.
She nodded. "Yeah. My mom really likes you. I really like you."
I smiled and leaned over to kiss her. "That's a good thing."
She wrapped her arms around my neck. "So what-"
The door to the back seat opened and Josh got in, not saying a word.
Lucy raised her eyebrows at me and pulled back to look at Josh. "Are you okay?"
He stared out the window but I could tell that he had been crying. Something went wrong.
"What is it?" I asked, turning around in my seat.
"He said no, okay? Just drop it," he snapped.
I felt bad for him. He didn't have anyone like Lucy was for me. He was alone.
I turned back around and stared out the window as Lucy drove. I wanted to be with her for a while, forget about Josh and how he was feeling. But I knew I had to help josh through this. It was the right thing to do.
When she pulled into Josh's driveway, he got out without saying anything.
I got out quickly and ran up to him, stopping him before he could go anywhere. "Wait."
He stopped and looked at me. He looked so... lost. And broken.
I hugged him tightly, staring over his shoulder at the trees on the side of his house.
He pressed his forehead into my shoulder and I felt tears start to run into my shirt. "Will you stay?"
"Of course," I said, squeezing my arms for a second before pulling back. "Give me a minute to tell Lucy."
He nodded and straightened up.
I walked back to the car and looked in the window. "I'm gonna stay here for a while."
She nodded. "Call if you need anything."
I gave her a small smile, nodded, and walked up the walk and into Josh's house.
The first floor was dark; the rest of his family must have been out somewhere. That must mean that Josh hadn't told any of them about today.
I headed up the steps and pushed the door to his room open. He was sitting on the floor against his bed, staring at his hands.
I sat down beside him. "You'll find someone soon."
He pressed his cheek to my shoulder, closing his eyes. "I've waited so long. It feels like forever."
"Well, Lucy told me that she was with another girl before me. And that didn't work out, obviously. She said she all but gave up. I'm kind of glad I didn't."
"She was a new kid. A fresh start. There aren't any new kids that would like me."
"You never know."
He sighed. "But I do and I know there isn't anyone out there for me."
"There's always someone," I said, pushing his head up. "You just have to put yourself out there."
"Like today? Putting myself out there will just leave me upset and depressed."
"And that's why I'm your best friend. To help you with that sort of thing," I said, smiling.
"There's something I've been meaning to ask you," he said, taking my hands in his.
"And that is..."
He sighed. He was nervous. Why would he be nervous?
"What if I've been wrong this whole time and I'm not... gay?"
"But you've always been..."
"I know. But it could explain why I haven't found anyone yet."
I was speechless. Josh had always been gay, always knew who he really was, deep down. What if he... liked me?
He laughed nervously, rubbing one hand on the back of his neck. "I just... wanted... I always wanted to know what it was like to... to kiss someone."
"You want to kiss... me?" I asked, my face heating up.
He nodded.
"I-" What could I say? No, that'd be weird? He was my best friend. I should give something in return, especially all the stuff I'd taken since we first met. "Okay."
It was awkward when he first started. His hand shook as he put it on the back of my neck, his fingers spread too far apart from each other to be comfortable on my skin.
He pressed his lips to mine and he moaned softly.
The doorbell went off. Someone was here.
I pushed Josh away softly, swallowing the lump in my throat.
"Is that Lucy?" Josh asked, looking over at me.
I shook my head. "She went home twenty minutes ago. It wouldn't be her."
His eyebrow raised and he got to his feet. "Come on. If that's some killer, I don't want to die alone."
I rolled my eyes and followed him down the steps. He stopped my the door and I walked right into his back.
"What?" I asked in an angry whisper.
He put a finger to his lips and opened the door slightly. He froze. "Joey?"
Joey? What was he doing here?
"Can we talk?" Joey asked.
Josh looked back at me, raised both eyebrows and smiled at me.
I laughed and practically pushed him out the door.
Maybe everyone gets a happy ending after all.
Chapter 12
"His cousin?" I asked, taking a handful of popcorn.
Josh nodded. "Yeah. He transferred from a different school across town."
"Because he's gay?" Lucy asked, nodding. "I totally get that."
"Yeah. Anyway, Joey said his cousin has been having a... slump, too. Did you know he's been dating someone for like a year?"
"Joey? Never saw that coming." I said around a mouthful of popcorn.
Lucy laughed. "You are such a pig."
I smiled.
"I hope I'm not like that with my boyfriend someday," Josh said.
"It won't be much fun then," I said, patting his hand.
He shrugged. "I think that's something I can live without."
I rolled my eyes.
"So when do you get to meet him?" Lucy asked, leaning around me to look at Josh.
"Tomorrow at school."
I smiled. "Care if we eavesdrop?"
"Obviously. I don't want you two saying anything that would make him think I'm a freak or something."
"You are a freak," I said.
He glared at me. "I'm not joking."
I sighed. "We'll stay far enough away he won't see us. Promise."
He nodded.
"Oh, hey, did your mom tell you when I'm coming over?" I asked Lucy.
"Friday... Is that okay with you?"
I smiled. "Definitely."
"My mom wanted to know if your mom would want to come, too."
"For dinner? I don't know... What if she doesn't think your perfect and she hates you and-" My voice kept rising and getting louder as I got more and more nervous.
"Abbey, relax. I don't think she'd do that."
"You don't know my mom like I do."
"It's just one night," she said, pressing her forehead to mine.
"What if she hates you?" I asked in a small voice.
"Oh, come on," Josh said, getting to his feet. "Your mom already knows about me. It'd be pointless for her to hate Lucy."
"See? Don't worry about it. Just invite her," Lucy said.
I nodded.
"Trust me on this." She whispered against my lips.
A car pulled up the driveway. It sounded like Luke was home.
"I think that's my cue to go." I said, pulling my phone out of my pocket.
"What? Why are you leaving?" Josh asked, looking over at me.
"It's starting to get late and I don't want my mom to get worried."
"Doesn't she know you're with me?"
"It's a Sunday, Josh. I can't stay out late."
He sighed. "Fine."
"Sorry," I said, heading for the door.
"Wait- I'll take you home," Lucy offered.
"Now you're both leaving me?"
"Calm down. It's not the end of the world," Lucy said.
"We'll see you tomorrow," I said apologetically, walking outside before he could whine some more.
"I'm glad things get to work out for him," Lucy said, wrapping one of her arms around my waist.
"Maybe then we'll get some alone time."
---
"Can you see anything?" I asked Lucy, shaking my hair away from my eyes.
She shook her head. "No. There's too many people in the way."
I sighed. "Maybe that's a sign we shouldn't know what's going on."
"Or that we should get closer," she said with a wicked grin. She took my hand and pulled me down the hallway, closer to Josh and the new kid.
"Whoa, he's cute," I said, staring at the boy. He had the perfect hair and skin tone. Even his clothes were perfect on him. He had square glasses that made his eyes even brighter when he smiled. He was perfect.
Lucy glared at me. "Really?"
I laughed. "You don't see me running after him or anything, do you?"
"No, but you're drooling a little."
I squeezed her hand. "Sorry."
Josh wrote his number on the boys wrist with marker, his hand slightly shaking. The boy was watching him with a look in his eyes that I knew all too well.
"I think Josh finally found himself someone," I mumbled.
"It's about time."
I looked over at Lucy and she looked... uncomfortable. I was sure she felt upset.
"Come here," I said in her ear. I pulled her into the bathroom and checked the stalls for anyone then I locked the door behind her. "Are you okay?"
She looked away and I noticed her hands were shaking.
I walked up to her, getting as close as I could and kissed her, hard on the mouth. "I'm not..." I shook my head, clearing it a little. "I don't like him, Lucy, not like you think."
"You've been with other guys that I can't compete with-"
"You're perfect compared to those guys. You won me over, not them. They were just... mistakes."
She stared down at my hand in hers and rubbed her thumb against the back of my hand. "I just... feel like you could do so much... better than me."
Now I was crying. I pulled her into my arms and hugged her tightly. "Who cares if I could? I want to be with you, Lucy, not anyone else."
She sniffed and laid her wet cheek on my shoulder. "Now I feel stupid. For crying like this."
"You're not stupid. You're just... you're a girl."
She laughed. "That's even worse."
I pushed her back a little. "Think about it. If you were a guy, we probably wouldn't be dating. The reason I fell in love with you is because you're a girl, Luce."
She brushed my tears away and kissed me. "Thanks."
I laughed and hugged her tightly. "We should get going or we'll be late."
"Who cares?"
"Our mothers will when they get a call wondering where we are."
She sighed but she was smiling. "Then let's go."
I took her hand and followed her out of the bathroom, past the few girls waiting to get in.
Chapter 13
I stopped in front of my locker and ripped the note off the paint, taking a few small specks with the tape.
The note read: I know. And I'm telling everyone.
I stuck the note in my folder and opened my locker. If people were going to act like that, fine. I didn't care. It wasn't going to stop Lucy and I at all.
I stuck my books in my locker, grabbing a folder and a smaller book, and closed the door.
Standing there against the other lockers was Sadie, a wicked grin on her face.
"What, here to steal one of my other ex's?" I asked bitterly. My heart wasn't in it today. Not after everything that happened to me.
"Ew, no. I'm not a gay freak," she said, scrunching her face up in disgust.
I glared at her. "What do you want?"
"I was hoping I could rub all of this in your face. You thought you were so much better than all of us, than me. Well, you aren't. Definitely not now that you go for the lowest of the low around here."
I rolled my eyes. "I thought that was you and Eric. Which is perfect, by the way. Two idiots without a clue."
"You're a bitch, you know that? And one of these days, you won't make it out of here."
"Do you think I'm scared? I'm not. None of this crap is going to make me dump Lucy. Especially not that you have a 'problem' with it."
She got close to my face, so close that I could tell she was getting a few unwanted beauty marks. "Oh, you think this is it? Hell, no. It's going to get worse. From me, from the rest of the school. We're not very keen on having gay classmates-"
"How did Josh get away with it for so long then?" I asked, crossing my arms over my chest.
"Nobody cares about him as it is. He's just... there. Unlike you and your... girlfriend waving it around school."
I punched her in the face, aiming right for her nose. "Rot in hell." I left Sadie there and ran in the opposite direction, toward the parking lot.
I was really hoping the cameras weren't turned on then. I'd definitely be in a lot of trouble.
---
"I found this before I left," I handed over the note to Lucy.
She read it once, then a second time, before she sighed. "I was really afraid of this. You don't know how serious this can get."
"I've seen this, Luce. I know how things will get. I just... don't care."
"You should. I don't want anyone to hurt you, Abbey."
I leaned against her and let my eyes close. "Please, please tell me you won't dump me over this."
Lucy wrapped her arms around me and hugged me tightly. "I'd have to be nuts to do that."
I smiled. "I was thinking of ordering pizza soon. What toppings do you want?"
She laid her cheek against my shoulder. "Whatever you want."
"Oh, come on. Pick something. Anything."
"Fine. Cheese."
I rolled my eyes and moved us to lay against my pillows.
"You know what I was thinking?" she asked, kissing me again.
"What's that?" I asked, smiling.
"We've never gone on an official date. Just the two of us."
"I think we could work something out. Soon," I said, kissing her.
Someone knocked on the door.
I screamed in surprise and fell off the bed, hitting my elbow on the floor.
"Please don't tell me your- Oh, hi." My brother walked into the room then, stopping when he saw Lucy.
I cleared my throat, wishing this would be a lot less awkward. I knew that probably wouldn't happen though. "Alex, this is Lucy, my girlfriend. Lucy, this is my brother."
"Abbey, can I see you out in the hallway?" he asked, meeting my gaze.
Sure, telling mom was hard and made me freaked but I was ten times more scared now. If Alex didn't like Lucy, this would be a very long summer.
I followed him out, closing the door with a soft click.
"So that's her, your girlfriend?"
I nodded. I completely forgot that they didn't know each other.
"So me leaving for college pretty much pushed me out of the family?"
"That's not what I-"
"You know I love you, Ab. I care more than you think," he said, hugging me.
"Then why didn't you ever call when you left?" I asked into his chest.
"I met someone too."
I pulled away from him, my eyebrows raised. "What's her name?"
"Ashley."
I nodded. "Did you get married or something? Is that why you never visited us or anything?"
He shook his head. "No, not yet."
"So you really love her?"
He nodded. "More than you think."
"Why haven't we met her yet?"
"I was waiting for a good time."
"And that's now?"
He nodded, not saying anything.
"So what's the reason? Is she a lot to take in or..."
His face got red and he nodded. "A little. She's pregnant."
"Pregnant?" I asked, almost yelling it.
He covered my mouth with his hand. "Would you shut up? If mom found out, she'd kill me."
"You're not telling her?"
"Not until Ashley gets here. She's driving down tomorrow."
"By herself? Why aren't you with her?" If that was Lucy and I someday, I'd never leave her side.
"She had a final to take before she left. And I kind of wanted to be here sooner rather than later."
I rolled my eyes. "You're kind of a bad boyfriend."
"Oh, come on."
I ignored him and walked back into my room.
"Who's pregnant?" Lucy asked, sitting up on my bed.
"My brother's girlfriend."
"I hope they know what they're doing."
I nodded. "Me too." I settled in beside her, taking her hand in mine.
"Do you think we'll ever... have kids?" she asked softly.
I looked over at her. "We can't. You know that."
"I mean... like adopt or something. Do you think we will someday?"
I shrugged. "Maybe."
She sat up and crossed her legs. "Does this mean I have to leave, now that your brother's here?"
I shook my head. "You can still stay."
She exhaled and I noticed she looked really nervous.
I moved to sit beside her and pushed her hair back behind her ear. "What is it?"
"I've never... met your mom before," she said softly.
"She's nice, I promise," I said, kissing her cheek.
Lucy nodded. "Okay."
"Please relax. For me," I said, wrapping my arms around her neck.
"I'll try," she said softly.
Chapter 14
Dinner was quiet; hardly anyone said anything. I was afraid mom was... indifferent about Lucy and I. Did she not want us together?
"How school going, Alex?" Mom asked, looking over at him.
I looked at him, trying not to smirk.
"Uh." He swallowed hard and stared down at his plate, not mom. "It's been good. My finals are all done so I don't have to go back for more schoolwork."
"That's good," she said, moving around her food on her plate. "Grace missed you since you left."
"Where's she at now?"
"Grandma has her for the weekend. We didn't expect you here so soon."
"Sorry about that," he said, lifting a shoulder. "Ashley and I wanted to get here before-"
"Before what?" Mom asked, not knowing, or having a clue, what was coming next.
Alex met my gaze for a second before looking back down. "Before the traffic got too bad, you know."
"Where's Ashley now? Shouldn't she be here?"
"She's on her way."
"Oh," Mom said, nodding. She turned her attention toward Lucy now. Oh, boy. "So Lucy, how's school going for you?"
"It's okay, I guess," she said in a quiet voice.
"Just okay?" Mom asked and looked over at me.
I took a deep breath. "People have been saying... stuff."
"About what?" Mom looked confused, her expression worried.
"About the two of us."
"Because you're a couple?"
Both of us nodded.
Mom took my hand and squeezed it. "They obviously have nothing better to do with themselves than to talk about the two of you."
The doorbell rang and all of us got quiet.
"I'll get it," Alex said, meeting my gaze before getting up from the table.
"Do you know why he's been acting funny?" Mom asked, looking at me.
"No, why would I?"
She looked at where Alex walked off and she froze, her whole body went rigid.
Alex was standing there, Ashley standing behind him. She definitely looked pregnant.
Mom got to her feet, letting go of my hand. "Alex, would you care to explain?"
"Mom, this is Ashley. Ashley, this is my mom." His voice was shaking a little.
"When were you going to tell me about... this? About her?"
"We were waiting until we were sure we loved each other. And we do."
"Enough to raise a baby on your own?" She sounded critical.
"We're not kids anymore, Mom."
"Well you're certainly not adults."
Alex glared at mom. "We love each other and we're having this baby. You can't stop us."
"You don't know what you're doing, Alexander. Babies are hard work."
"We get that. We're ready, Mom, even if you don't think we are."
Mom sighed but didn't say anything. She got up from the table, with her plate, and went into the kitchen, not saying anything to all of us.
I nudged Lucy and took my plate. She followed me outside and I set my plate on the porch floor. "I'll be right back."
I ran in the house and grabbed two things before coming back to her. I sat down across from her and put a candle down between us, lighting it with one of Mom's lighters.
Lucy laughed. "This is... wow."
I smiled at her. "I didn't want the night to be completely ruined."
"It wasn't so bad."
"Please. My mom never gets like that. I guess... All of this means my brother's growing up and that he doesn't really need her. I think it's making her moody."
"My Mom gets like that with me. Since I'm her only child and all."
"She'll probably get like that with my sister."
"I think it's because our parents are getting older and they don't like that."
I laughed. "Probably."
We ate in silence for a few minutes before Lucy spoke again. "I'm really glad things didn't work out in there."
I stared at her, confused.
She laughed. "You know, so we could end up here. It's nice, really, all of this." She moved to sit beside me and took my hand. "I don't think I could survive being with anyone else. It just... wouldn't feel right. This does."
"I love you," I said all of a sudden, staring at the green grass a few feet from us.
Lucy looked up at me, smiling. "You know you've never said that to me before."
"I haven't?"
She shook her head. "Not until now."
I leaned over and kissed her. "Then you should feel extra special right now."
She wrapped her arms around my neck and pressed her forehead to mine. "I always do."
I laughed and kissed her again, never wanting to leave from that spot. It was perfect. We were perfect.
The End